Down and Dirty, page 15
Luca chuckled. “Paranoid bastard probably thinks we sent her in to spy on him.”
“When you put it that way, I’m not so sad about her keeping that job,” Joey said, laughing. “Let him sweat it out, thinking she’s feeding us all his sordid secrets.”
It wasn’t unusual for the guys to come over on Sunday afternoons in the winter to watch whatever sport was in season together. Today was a little quieter than usual, as Aunt Berta had taken Jasper to a birthday party for his cousin’s son, Billy. Jasper had been living for the party, talking about little else all week. Tony was glad the day had finally come, not sure Jasper would have been able to contain his excitement a second longer.
The moment she’d discovered Jasper would be occupied all afternoon, Jess had taken an extra shift at Paulie’s, despite his invitation to join them all to watch the game.
It had been three weeks since he and Rhys had kissed her.
Three long fucking weeks.
Since then, Jess had spent most of the time she was in the apartment with Jasper in their room or taking on more shifts at the diner.
She was working herself to the point of exhaustion, and Tony’d had enough of seeing the dark circles under her eyes. To make matters worse, she was losing weight again.
Something needed to give, and he intended to bring the subject up to Rhys as soon as the guys left.
Tony glanced up at the sound of Jasper’s voice.
He bounded into the living room with a bit more energy than usual. Which was saying something, considering the kid bounced more than Tigger.
Tony grinned as Jasper made his way around the room, fist-bumping all the guys, something Kayden had taught him to do whenever their team scored. Since then, it was Jasper’s favorite greeting.
“Hyped-up on birthday cake?” Rhys asked Aunt Berta, who followed him into the room, looking like she’d had a day and a half.
“Fifteen kids under the age of seven,” she said exhaustedly. “All of them on sugar overload by the end of the party. Not sure who thought a pinata was a good idea.”
Tony stood up and gave his aunt a kiss on the cheek. “Why don’t you go on down to your apartment and relax for a little while? I’ll call Jess and ask her to bring us all subs home from Paulie’s for dinner.”
The fact Aunt Berta was okay with takeout told him just how insane her afternoon had been. “Sounds perfect.” Then she looked around the living room, giving every single man a very pointed look. “All of these beer bottles are going to be in the recycling bin when I come back up, right?”
“You can count on me to keep these slobs in line,” Joey said, winking at Aunt Berta, who rolled her eyes at him.
“Joseph Moretti, you were the one I was talking to. Lord help the woman who agrees to marry you.”
Joey had a well-earned reputation in their family for his messiness. It was one of the reasons Tony had been anxious to move into this apartment with Rhys. If he’d had to spend another month picking up his brother’s smelly socks and dirty dishes, he would have lost his shit.
Aunt Berta left and Jasper climbed onto the couch, squeezing a spot for himself between Rhys and Aldo, the latter playfully ruffling the boy’s hair. “How are you doing, Jasper?”
“Good.” Jasper grinned, revealing a new gap left behind by the loss of his second front tooth. He loved hanging out with the guys on Sundays, and Jess had admitted a couple weeks earlier the best part about living with them was that Jasper had the opportunity to spend time with positive male role models.
“Did you have fun at the party?” Rhys asked him during a commercial break.
Jasper nodded enthusiastically. “We played games and had cake and ice cream and…oh!” He jumped off the couch. “I forgot. We got toys too!” He dashed out of the living room.
Two seconds later, Tony heard glass breaking.
He and Rhys rose quickly, following the sound.
Jasper stood by the front door, his coat in his hands. Next to him, in three broken pieces, was a pottery bowl Aunt Berta had found at a yard sale. She’d given it to them to put their keys in.
Jasper’s eyes welled up with tears. “I bumped into the table.” He held up his coat, retrieving a small plastic football from his pocket. “I wanted to show you my toy.”
“That’s okay,” Tony said, bending down to pick up the broken bowl and keys scattered on the floor. “It was an accident.”
“I’m sorry.” The boy’s voice quivered as he tried to hold back his tears.
“Jasper,” Rhys said, putting a comforting hand on his head. “It’s okay, buddy.”
“Are you going to make us leave?” he asked miserably.
“What?” Tony asked, kneeling in front of Jasper. “What are you talking about?”
“I broke a lamp at Miss Brenda’s and she told Mommy I couldn’t come back anymore. Are you going to make us go back to the shelter?”
Tony placed the three pieces of pottery and keys on the table and hugged Jasper, his heart breaking that the kid was so afraid of being sent away. “Jasper. It was an accident. We would never send you away for breaking something. Hell—heck,” he amended. “There’s nothing you could do that would make us send you away.”
Rhys reached over and tipped Jasper’s face up with a gentle hand under the boy’s chin. “You and your mommy will have a home here for as long as you want it. Nothing you do will change that. That’s a promise. And I don’t break promises.”
Jasper nodded, but he still didn’t look convinced.
Tony, desperate to ease the boy’s mind, stood up, grabbed the biggest piece of the broken bowl, and threw it down, splintering it into five more pieces. “Besides, I broke the bowl way more than you.”
Jasper looked up at him uncertainly, but finally a small smile appeared. “You broke it on purpose.”
Tony nodded. “Yep. And that’s way worse than doing it on accident. Why don’t you and Rhys go back and watch the rest of the game while I clean up my mess?”
“I can help,” Jasper offered. “Earn my keep.”
He was mimicking Jess, and it occurred to Tony that while Jess may not have intended it, her inability to accept help easily was rubbing off on Jasper. He and Rhys clearly still had some work to do. To convince mother and son that this was their home, and they didn’t have to walk around on eggshells in order to stay.
“Come on. You don’t need to be messing around with those sharp edges,” Rhys said, grabbing the plastic football Jasper had dropped on the floor. “Leave that to a grown-up. We’ll go back, watch hockey, and play with this with the guys. They’ll all be jealous you have such a cool ball.”
Jasper allowed Rhys to lead him back to the living room, while Tony retrieved a broom and dustpan. Once the mess was cleaned up, he returned to watch the game, but his heart wasn’t into it. He was too distracted by his new roommates, wishing he knew how he could set their minds at ease.
Jess had made several comments in passing over the past two months about her upbringing, and it was apparent she’d never truly lived in a home where she felt she belonged, where she didn’t have to earn the right to remain there. She had also told them about her experiences with foster care, explaining that was why she’d been hesitant to call social services immediately. It killed him to know she’d been so terrified of losing Jasper. As far as he was concerned, there wasn’t a more loving mother on the planet.
He was still sitting on the couch, long after the game ended and the guys left. The television was on, but he wasn’t paying a damn bit of attention to it. Rhys had found some National Geographic thing about penguins, though Tony suspected his roommate wasn’t really watching it either. Jasper had crashed pretty hard after his sugar rush, falling asleep on the couch. Rhys had carried him back to the bedroom an hour ago so he could finish his nap in peace.
“You’ve been quiet this afternoon,” Rhys mused.
“Just thinking. Worried. Jess never stops. I thought living here would take some of the stress off her, but it hasn’t.”
Rhys nodded. “I had hoped for the same thing. Jess has had to work hard her entire life, only having herself to rely on, Tony. It’s going to take more than a couple months of living here to break something that is so deeply ingrained inside her.”
Tony knew all of that, even though it was hard for him to accept. But that wasn’t the main thing bothering him. “She’s holding herself back from us. Staying away.”
“Those kisses…” Rhys started.
Tony wanted to regret kissing Jess the way he had. It had been impulsive and stupid and it had spooked her. But that kiss…it had solidified something he’d only suspected up until that point.
Jess belonged here. With them.
“I want her. Want to be with her.” Tony hadn’t spoken those words aloud. Doing so now felt…freeing.
Rhys studied his face, and Tony could almost imagine the wheels turning in his best friend’s brain, seeking—as always—the truthful answer.
In the end, Rhys forced himself to admit what they both knew. “So do I. I’ve never felt an attraction like this. I’ve spent more hours this past month than I care to admit, trying to pinpoint what it is that makes Jess so different from other women. Honestly, I think it’s everything. She’s tenacious, brave, intelligent, stubborn as hell, and so fucking gorgeous, it’s hard to look away from her. She’s one of the most loving mothers I’ve ever met, and I know that because I have a pretty amazing mom myself. She works as hard as we do.”
Tony shook his head. “No. She works harder.”
Rhys nodded, accepting that correction. “You’re right. She does.”
“I want to take away her stress. Her fears. I just…don’t know how to do that because she won’t let me. Won’t let us,” Tony quickly amended.
“I know, but she’s not wrong to hold herself back, Tony. To use caution. I’d bet my entire life savings she knows we want her. And she wants us too. But none of us has a clue how to morph those desires into…whatever comes next. We’re just as inexperienced when it comes to relationships as she is, if you think about it.”
Tony ran his hand through his hair, overwhelmed by the need to argue that fact. But he couldn’t. And he didn’t get the chance when they heard the front door open.
Jess walked into the living room with a large bag in her hands. “Dinner,” she said, offering them the same tired smile that had taken up permanent residence on her face. “Where’s the key bowl?”
“I broke it,” Tony lied smoothly, rising to take the bag from her hands. “I’ll text Aunt Berta and tell her dinner is here.”
“Jasper in the bedroom?”
Rhys nodded, rising as well. “Yeah. Overstimulated by the party. He conked out about an hour ago. You look tired.” He lifted his hand and ran his fingers along Jess’s cheek affectionately.
“I’m fine.”
“You don’t need to keep working extra shifts, Jess.”
“Or the second job with the Russos,” Tony added.
“You know Matt Russo is a pretty nice guy these days, right? He’s not eighteen anymore.”
It was the worst thing she could have said, but he got the sense that was why she said it. Jess was scrambling to maintain her distance, using every weapon in her arsenal. “Stay away from Matt Russo. He’s a fucking prick,” he groused.
Jess rolled her eyes, and Tony itched to spank her ass for it. She had a very spankable ass. Something she probably would not like hearing.
“You don’t have to work so hard all the time.” Rhys said the words gently, but Jess’s response was the same as always.
She bristled, her spine stiffening, the response her go-to. “I can’t impose on you guys forever.”
Tony’s temper flared, but he forced himself to bite his tongue.
“I’ll go wake Jasper for dinner,” she said, obviously aware she was pushing their buttons and ready to make a quick escape.
The rest of the night passed somewhat peacefully, Aunt Berta and Jasper dominating the dinner conversation. He, Rhys, and Jess were more subdued, the tension between them simmering just below the surface. The string connecting them had been stretched too taut and they were quickly approaching a day of reckoning.
Though God only knew what the hell that would look like.
He and Rhys had retired to the living room to watch yet another a hockey game. Aunt Berta had returned to her apartment right after dinner, still worn out from the birthday party. Tony had listened as Jess and Jasper worked their way through their nightly routine of a bath and bedtime story. It had been quiet in their room for nearly an hour. Tony assumed Jess had given in to her own exhaustion and gone to bed with Jasper.
So he was surprised when she strolled into the living room a few minutes later. She was dressed in a long-sleeved T-shirt and lounge pants, fuzzy socks on her feet. She’d pinned her hair up in a ponytail. She looked completely adorable, and his cock—the asshole—responded instantly.
Jess tossed a twenty-dollar bill down on the coffee table.
“What’s that for?” he asked, not bothering to mask his irritation. He was tired of her constantly trying to give them money they didn’t want or ask for.
“Jasper told me he broke the bowl.”
Tony waved at the money. “Take that back. It was an accident.”
“Accident or not, I’m paying for it.”
Tony rose, the frustration that had been simmering all day finally pushing its way out. “Take. The. Money. Back.”
“You lied. You said you broke it.”
Tony raised his hands, gesturing in aggravation, his Italian roots showing. “It was no big deal, Jess.”
“I’m trying to teach Jasper responsibility. And if it was no big deal, why would you say you broke it?”
Tony leaned toward her, refusing to back down. “The kid was scared. He thought we were going to kick you both out.”
Rhys stood as well. “Jess. Jasper was upset. We were simply trying to defuse the situation.”
She turned to Rhys, her voice still raised. “By lying?”
Tony pointed to the twenty. “This conversation is over. Pick up that money and take it back.”
She crossed her arms, her stubbornness shining through. “No.”
“Goddammit, Jess. Take it back.”
“No!” she shouted.
“Fuck. I’m done with this.” Tony reacted before he could think. Spurred on by so many emotions, he didn’t know which end was up.
He reached out and grasped her upper arms, tugging her toward him.
Jess gasped in shock, but that sound was cut off the second he slammed his lips against hers, kissing her roughly.
He expected her to shove him back, his body already tensing, braced for her retaliation.
What he didn’t anticipate was her returning the kiss tenfold, her hands going to his waist, pulling him toward her.
Tony released her arms, wrapping his own around her body, needing to feel her—every inch of her—pressed against to him. The kiss elevated to the next level, tongues and teeth fighting for domination. Jess gave as good as she got when she nipped his lower lip, drawing blood.
The kiss went on and on. Tony was afraid to stop. Terrified she’d pull away again.
Finally, he felt a hand on his shoulder, one that didn’t belong to Jess.
He and Jess ended the kiss at the same time and when he opened his eyes, he realized Rhys had placed a hand on both of them. He and Jess were breathing heavily, gasping for air like horses who’d just run the Kentucky Derby.
They looked at each other, shell-shocked, dumbfounded.
“We need to move this to the bedroom,” Rhys said. “Now.”
Chapter Thirteen
Jess walked down the hall to Rhys’s bedroom, both men flanking her. For weeks, her brain had been working on overdrive, whirling twenty-four seven over this inevitability.
She’d come up with a very long list of reasons why sleeping with Tony and Rhys was wrong—top of that list including she didn’t want to fuck up her current living situation, as well as the fact Tony and Rhys were confirmed bachelors who restricted their relationships with the fairer sex to booty calls.
Sex wasn’t just a physical thing for Jess. She wished she could separate sex and emotions, but she wasn’t wired that way. God, Rhys and Tony had only kissed her so far, and already she felt her tenuous grip on her heart slipping.
Then she’d created an equally long list of ways to avoid this situation that included staying away from them as much as possible and cold showers. Lots of cold showers.
She’d also come up with a strict budget she thought would help her achieve her goal of getting her own place sooner so she wouldn’t be around them constantly, tempted.
Jesus, the temptation had nearly driven her mad. She counted her savings at least a dozen times a day, as if counting would increase it.
Every single second of every single day had been exhausting, yet not enough to keep her from tossing and turning all night until the next morning, when she stepped on the treadmill that never stopped moving again.
All that thinking, fighting, resisting.
And now?
It was gone. All of it.
There wasn’t a single thought in her mind as she walked into Rhys’s room and watched Tony close and lock the door.
Nothing except the bone-deep feeling that for the first time in her life, she was exactly where she wanted to be.
The impact of that realization was so overwhelming, she couldn’t breathe.
Something Rhys clearly noticed.
He cupped her cheeks, his astute gaze missing nothing. “There’s no point of no return. You say no or stop, and it all ends. You understand that?”
“I want you,” she whispered. “I want both of you. So much it hurts.”
Those words were the ones she’d shoved to the deepest recesses of her mind, refusing to allow them out in the light of day. She’d buried them in the back of the filing cabinet behind all her very logical lists and budgets.
Once they were spoken aloud, the corner turned, Rhys and Tony moved in unison. It was as if she’d unshackled invisible bonds, setting them both free.
