Bear, page 15
“Even my attitude?” she playfully asked.
“Especially that.”
“I’ll be sure to remind ya you said that.” She smiled even though he couldn’t see it.
“Little momma, how could I ever forget?” He chuckled and the smell of whiskey mixed with her essence lingered on his breath. While the latter was hot as hell, the former just fed into the twinge of uncertainty that’d burrowed deep in her heart the morning after their first time.
“I am pretty remarkable,” she whispered, but she was second-guessing her decision to leave the past behind them. She’d decided not to clue him in on their real history since it didn’t have anything to do with what had developed between them this time around, but if what they were building was real, then there should only be honesty between them.
If she told him, he could erase any doubt—no matter how tiny and fleeting—that he’d only acted that way to brush her off. Both of their lives had changed so much over the last couple of years. She knew the truth about his job with the Bang Shift and understood the danger of him being a mercenary. She hoped if he’d lied, it was for some noble reason, like for her protection. If he truly didn’t remember, then he was missing a major milestone in their relationship, and she was the one keeping it from him.
Teddy’s breathing slowed as he fell asleep, but Roxie continued to rub light circles on his chest, thinking about their past and their future. When her thoughts drifted to Chad’s father and the possibility that he’d lied to her all along, she made a decision.
Regardless of what had really happened after that fateful night of heavy drinking, she was going to tell Teddy exactly what had gone down.
They had a long drive back tomorrow. Just the two of them. Alone, in a confined space. For several hours. He’d be her captive audience. It was the perfect opportunity.
Before they arrived home, he would know the truth…and finally, so would she.
Chapter Twenty-One
Bear topped off the gas tank as Brody changed Xander’s diaper in the backseat of the Honda.
“I don’t know how a person his size can poop this much.”
“At least, I’m down wind. That kid’s part you. I know how bad your shit stinks.”
Brody tossed the dirty diaper into the trash can and flipped the bird.
Bear chuckled, shaking his head at his friend, and caught sight of Roxie and Xan in a spirited discussion, waving around the cups of coffee they were carrying, as they walked back to the vehicles. “Well, that can’t be good,” he muttered.
After belting Xander into his car seat, Brody stretched. “Whatever it is, they didn’t forget our body’s fuel. That’s all that matters.”
Roxie broke off from Xan’s side even though her friend looked to be in mid-sentence. Xan huffed and stomped to the Honda. “I ain’t tryin’ to hear that,” Roxie said before Xan got in the car.
Bear eased into the driver’s seat of his truck and started the engine. Roxie’s arms were crossed as she stared out the side window, obviously affected by whatever she and Xan had been arguing about. Once they were on the road, he said, “Thanks for the coffee.”
“Welcome.” No other words came.
Good thing he was used to being direct with his team. Though, working with a bunch of pissed-off mercenaries, who could take out a target without leaving any witnesses, was less scary than approaching an angry woman. He was a team leader, not an idiot. “What was that about?”
She grumbled something under her breath as she tied her locks into a knot on top of her head. With her hair up high, Bear had a hard time not reaching over and running the back of his finger along the column of her neck.
“She’s just pitchin’ a hissy fit.”
“Doesn’t really seem like her to do that for no reason,” he said gently and hoped it didn’t come off as combative.
Roxie whipped her head around and shot him a deadly glare. Apparently, it hadn’t worked.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Why don’t you enlighten me, babe?”
When she didn’t speak, he glanced through the back window and saw Xan waving her hands around. Without holding two cups of coffee, she was pointing at Bear’s truck and at herself as she talked rapidly. Clearly, she didn’t have the same problem as Roxie. Normally, Bear didn’t mind silence, but whatever was going on affected her. Not only was he direct, but he was also patient. They had a long ride ahead of them.
After about twenty minutes, she relaxed in her seat, but he wasn’t foolish enough to open his mouth just yet. After another ten minutes of her sipping coffee, she finally said, “She’s of the opinion that, sometimes, it’s not a good idea to dredge up the past. That doing so is just borrowing trouble.”
Without showing any victorious reaction that Roxie was talking, he said, “Yeah, sometimes, it is a bad idea. You just gotta decide if it’s worth the risk.”
“I mean, she’s right, though. We have a lot of stuff going on right now with y’all rebuilding the shop, hitting dead ends on Thad, the boys graduating high school…”
“True, but what does any of that have to do with walking down memory lane?”
“Nothing. Everything. Depends on how you look at.”
When he glanced in her direction, her gaze scrutinized him. “How do you look at it?”
“That’s not a question easily answered. Before? With a mix of confusion and hurt with a healthy dose of irritation. Now? I’m not sure.”
She was talking in circles. “That’s how you viewed the past, or how you feel about bringing up the past?”
Shaking her head, she said, “You ever keep something to yourself, rather than talk about it with others?”
“C’mon, Roxie. My job is one big secret. Very few people know what I actually do.”
She seemed to mull that over. “Okay, how ’bout this? You ever keep something from me?”
“Sure. There are missions I can’t ever talk about.”
“I don’t mean stuff like that. I’m talking personal.”
If he looked hard enough, he swore he’d be able to see big, flashing yellow lights with a sign warning, “Danger! Proceed with Caution,” right above her head. “I can’t say for certain I have. We’re still getting to know each other.”
“We’ve been doing that for years. Shouldn’t we already know everything? If not, shouldn’t we be able to talk about anything, regardless of what it was?”
He bit his cheek and looked out the side window. He wanted her to vent whatever was bothering her, but he didn’t want to become a target for her anger since the person she was pissed at wasn’t in shouting distance. Then something occurred to him. What if this wasn’t about Xan? What if…
“Does this have anything to do with me?”
Her lips flattened, and she looked out the window.
Shit. Shit. Shit. He racked his brain for what he’d done in the past that had set her off. How far in the past had she gone? Was she talking years ago? Hell, she’d been fine last night. “Is this because I didn’t wear a condom? I thought we talked about going without. I figured it’d be special to have that first time while we were away. I’m so sorry if—”
“No, you big dummy.”
Her slight smirk eased his concern a little, but something bothered her and that something was him. No, he wasn’t a dummy, but it didn’t take a genius to figure out he was the root of what troubled her. “You can tell me anything, babe,” he said again, gentle with his words. When she didn’t lash out again, he released the breath he hadn’t realized he’d held.
“What do you think happened after our first time?”
His eyes popped as he watched the road. Talking with Chad had felt like navigating a minefield, but this? Jesus, this was like Roxie chucking explosives right at his head as if playing a deadly game of dodgeball. There was no easy way to answer this question. At all. “Someone retreated,” he said slowly.
He chanced a glance at her and saw her brow furrowed. She opened and closed her mouth a few times without saying anything, which meant his answer surprised her. Rather than keep talking, he reached for his cup to take a sip while she worked through his answer in her head.
“Do you have a drinking problem?”
He choked on the coffee he just tried to swallow, coughing several times. After he managed to get what remained in his mouth down the correct pipe, he said, “No. Why would you think that?” He put the cup down and dug out a napkin to wipe up the mess.
“Just trying to figure out if you regretted it because you’d been drinking and not thinking clearly.”
What the hell? “Babe, I don’t even remember the last time I had so much to drink that I was that impaired.” If he thought hard enough, he probably could, but that’d require him to drift off from this conversation. No way was he taking that kind of risk. He needed his wits about him.
“Um, because you were drunk as Cooter Brown.” The word obviously was very definitely implied. “And don’t give me that. We both know how shitfaced you can get.”
Now, he was the one opening and shutting his mouth like a fish out of water. When he didn’t respond fast enough, she continued, her voice becoming more incredulous with every word.
“Xan got all snippy because I was determined to tell you about that night, but I thought you were going to tell me you didn’t remember. I mean, I knew there was a chance you’d lied about it, but Xan was all like, ‘Good grief, Roxie, he’s not playing mind games with you. You’re gettin’ your knickers in a knot over nothin’. Don’t be that woman.’ But here we are.”
“I remember that night.”
“I know,” she yelled. “That’s why I’m so pissed.”
“Wait. So you’re mad at me because I remember having sex, not because I don’t?”
“Yes!”
Was she drunk now? He knew better than to actually voice that question, but damn, it was hard. “Babe, I’m not following you.”
“I’m mad that you lied to me.”
“Roxie, I have never lied to you. Ever.”
“You just admitted you’d retreated after we had sex.”
“No. I said someone retreated. I figured it was obvious the person who’d thrown up barriers was you.”
She reared back as if he’d taken a swing at her. “I did no such thing!” Her phone rang, and she jumped, grabbing her chest.
Bear gritted his teeth. For as much as he embraced this woman’s sass, he didn’t like it being directed at him.
She looked at her phone and mumbled it was her son. “Hey, baby,” she answered, releasing a heavy breath. “Wait, what?” she asked, her gaze flying to Bear. His darted back and forth between the road and her, watching as her demeanor changed from anger to confusion. “Chad, slow down. I’m putting you on speaker.”
“Don’t even need stitches, which is good since the Bears’ scout is coming by on Thursday. I need you to sign a permission slip for me to get out of class early—”
“Stitches?” she shrieked. “I thought you said something about the car. Did you get into an accident?”
Bear put his hand on Roxie’s knee to soothe her and calmly said, “Chad, I’m going to need you to start from the beginning, buddy.”
“Becca wanted me to come over and eat with her family. I only brought sweats and stuff to Oz’s house, so I stopped by home to shower and change into something nicer. When I walked outside, someone was squatting down by the back tire, messing with it.” He said each sentence as if reciting directions from a manual. “I rushed over, yelling at the guy. I didn’t see the tire iron. He swung and apparently clocked me in the head because the next thing I knew I was coming to on the ground. He was gone when I woke up.”
“Oh my God,” Roxie breathed.
“I called Oz, and he took me to the hospital. They did x-rays and stuff. Busted the skin, and they sealed it with glue. No broken bones. Gonna have a nasty bruise, though.”
“You were supposed to stay with Oz at all times, Chad,” Roxie said, her voice taut with anger.
“But, mom, it was afternoon dinner at my girlfriend’s house.”
Bear stroked Roxie’s thigh, trying to ease her tirade. She’d been swimming in irritation with Bear before the call, and he didn’t want her taking out her frustration on her son. “What did he look like?”
“Shorter than me. Brown wavy hair that needed a good washin’ and skinny. The cheap shot he took was the only reason he got away.”
Roxie’s cheeks drained of their rosy color. “Sounds like that guy who mugged me.” Her gaze flew to Bear. “He knows our address.”
Bear gave a slight shake of his head, not wanting her to jump to conclusions without all the facts. It wasn’t likely a random criminal would risk robbing her house in daylight, but it was possible with social media that he knew she’d be out of town this weekend. He couldn’t dismiss the idea, but he wanted to talk to Oz before developing theories.
“Actually, mom, even though it happened so fast, you know who he looked like? A scrawny version of Flint.”
Roxie’s hand went to her chest. “What?”
Bear gripped the steering wheel tighter and pushed a little harder on the gas. Flint Willis? He hadn’t shown his face in this town since he’d gotten mixed up with the wrong crowd and went on the run. The sheriff’s office had spent too much time dealing with the embarrassment and only a few months ago had elected a new official to replace him.
“Did you tell Oz?” Bear asked.
“No. I mean, he wasn’t around when Flint was sheriff, so he wouldn’t understand that comparison when I described the guy. I’m not saying it was him. Just that it looked like him if he was a lot thinner now.”
“That’s all right, bud. We’re still an hour out. Just hang tight with Oz until we get back.”
Roxie said her goodbye, her voice losing its panic, but her eyes held tightly to the emotion.
“What if it’s Flint, that no good, dirty piece of shit?” she said.
“Then, I’ll deal with him.” She stared out the window. Bear knew what he was about to ask would probably only rile her up more, but he couldn’t avoid it. “Babe, have you told Chad about his father being in town?”
Her gaze whipped to him. “No, and unless we have proof, I’m not going to. How could I tell him his father might be around, but if he is, he’s an evil bastard?”
“I know you don’t like thinking about it, but he’s eighteen. The guy is smart. He can deal with the blow either way, but leaving him in the dark puts him at risk. If he’d known about the possible danger, he might not have gotten caught alone today.”
“So, this is my fault?”
His lip twitched at her sassy comment. It lacked the anger from her earlier words with him. “No, babe. Knowledge is power, and we can use all we can get. I’ll respect whatever you decide, though.” He reached for his phone to call Oz but smiled at her. “Just like I’d do if you had married me when I told you to.”
Rolling her eyes, she muttered, “Bossy-ass motherfucker.” Then she grabbed her phone. “I’m messaging Xan.”
One way or another, Bear was getting to the bottom of this. Everything was hitting too close to home, and he didn’t fucking like it.
Not one fucking bit.
Chapter Twenty-Two
The last few days, Bear had the Bang Shift crew holed up at the shop, digging into everything little thing they could find on The Shadow, Chad’s father, Flint, and the guy who’d attacked Chad. Oz had spent most of his time there, too, sharing what he’d found on Roxie’s mugger and the Flint-lookalike guy from Sunday. Nothing had debunked the theory that Chad’s father was The Shadow, and Roxie had finally sat Chad down last night and told him what had been going on. Just like Bear had figured, the boy had taken it all in stride if he wasn’t just a little shocked.
It seemed too coincidental for some of this to not be related, since Roxie was the common denominator. It just didn’t make any sense.
The only people not spending every moment picking apart the pieces of what’d happened over the last four months—Hell, over the last several years—were Shelby, Blade, and Anna. Shelby stayed on Roxie like glue, and no way did Bear want to disrupt Blade and Anna’s honeymoon. Blade would probably take his favorite knife to Bear’s throat if he so much as called them right now. Brody either video-chatted from home or brought Xan and the baby into the shop. Ever since the possibility of The Shadow being in town had stirred, Bear hadn’t left her unprotected.
Oz put some uniformed officers at the school, which helped ease Bear’s mind. If the boys were out of school already, their asses would be up here, too. At least with the local police force assisting, Bear could put all his energy into finding who had attacked Chad…at least while he was at the shop.
When he was home with Roxie, his attention was focused on her. Whatever miscommunication she’d thought they’d had about Halloween night, she’d buried it. Every evening since they’d returned from Louisiana, she’d practically mauled him whenever he’d walked through the front door and Shelby promptly left. If Chad was already home, Roxie would wait until late at night to rock his world. He wasn’t complaining. It was a good stress reliever to plow into her willing body until they were both spent, but he wasn’t a fool. His little spitfire was one minor disagreement away from boiling over again. The threat would remain until they could hash it out, but his days were long, and their nights were sweaty. If a physical release, and not an engrossing conversation, was what she needed right now, he was more than willing to give it to her. It sure as hell wasn’t a sacrifice.
Jesus, he should be exhausted, but his dick twitched just thinking about their last time together. After staying up late talking to Chad, she’d woken Bear up early this morning, sucking his dick. When he couldn’t resist her hot little body any longer, he’d pulled her off and rolled her over. They’d fucked as if they couldn’t get close enough to each other, a heady desperation cloaking the air. And still, he wanted her again…and again.
Maybe he could slip away a little early this afternoon. After all, she was off on Thursdays.
