Enclosed, page 3
The door creaked as I entered the shop, and Abigail put on a bright smile for what she thought was a paying customer.
“Just me,” I said as I walked into the clothing store. I looked at the beautiful material that she was able to purchase from our one outside source and felt the smooth touch that came from it.
Abigail ran from her spot to give me a big hug. I lost my breath as she slammed into me, but needing some kind of love, squeezed back to return the hug.
“Lis, I am so happy for you,” she whispered before letting me go.
I yawned and waved away at her comment. “Don’t be happy for me, it is just how the ceremony turned out. Can we sit for a few minutes and chat or are you busy creating a new masterpiece of a dress?”
Abigail’s took just a second too long to reply as I realized how stupid I was to make that remark. Over a year ago, Abigail and her family were in charge of making Catherine Gerard’s dress for our annual Fall Festival. The fabric she wanted, this beautiful lilac dress with violet elements, was very desirable but Mrs. Simmons got there first, and bought out most of the fabric for her dress. When Catherine Gerard came and demanded the fabric, although Mrs. Simmons dress was already completed, purchased, and sent home, she threw a tantrum in the store and demanded to get the fabric back so she can have a dress made from the beautiful cloth. Abigail’s parents refused out of principle and did the worst thing you could do to yourself in this town—deny Catherine Gerard what she wanted. She never got to wear that dress, but she spoiled the reputation of the store, and has now controlled Abigail’s chances at the lottery to find herself a true husband.
“I am glad at least one of us will get married,” Abigail claimed as she took a seat, reaching for a needle and thread. “I think it is all over for me.”
I cringed at her pessimistic words and contemplated on what I wanted to say. I was guaranteed that she was doomed, but my sister’s words rang back to me about how I could help her situation and maybe, I could help Abigail. But, since I first had to meet Aaron Gerard, I was not going to share this with Abigail just yet.
“Abigail, we will do what we can to make it work,” I announced in a determined way. “If anything, we will have each other to rely on and help each other. I mean, I am now officially stuck with Catherine Gerard of all people. It’s so bothersome to think I will have to spend all my time with the most spiteful woman in town and always pretend to like her because she is family. I do, however, rely on you to help me with it.”
Abigail stopped playing with the thread and stared at me with a look of determination in her eyes. She took a deep breath and put her work down.
“Lis, after what that hateful woman has done to me and my family, I don’t believe we can continue our friendship if you’re related to her.”
I just felt the air release out of me like I was punched in the gut. Her kind but determined features remained cool as I processed what she was saying.
“But… I didn’t choose this,” I whispered, too stunned by her bluntness.
Abigail’s coolness thawed as she reached a hand towards me. “I know, Lis, I really do. I hate this more than you, and I know I should not put any blame on you. Just look at it from my point of view. Knowing what position I am going towards and the position you will soon be in, we will have nothing left in common and my resentment will only grow until one of us gets hurt. I don’t ever want to think of you in a negative way when we have been so close growing up. With that being said, our lives will change drastically next month, and it might be best to dissolve our friendship and focus on the future.”
I bent my head during her speech so she couldn’t see me cry. Nodding demurely, I stood and kept my gaze on the floor as I exited the shop, trying to ignore the tears that hung on my eyelashes. I don't know Abigail felt about me running out. I just know she didn't try to stop me. She didn't call out or anything. I ran to the woods, crying as misery wracked through my chest, misery that was becoming my life.
As I burst towards the blurry green that I knew to be trees, I started crying earnestly over the last couple days. I sat on the ground and let the tears spill out of me before wistfully playing with the grass that I sat in. As I started braiding the grass, trying not to think about how Abigail and I used to do this when we were children, I heard groans coming from behind me.
Stilled by the sounds, I sat frozen, wondering if it was human or animal.
Then I heard the grunts again and I shot up, ready to flee if I felt I was in danger. Just as I was about to leave, I heard a giggle and felt my stance relax as I realized there were people in the woods just like me. I tried to shake the dirt from my dress and quickly braided my hair, but I knew I was not very pleasant looking from my wild day.
Wiping my face, I decided to put on a smile and say hello to the people behind me, partly because I needed companionship, but also because I didn’t want to scare them when they would have trampled over me when they would start heading back into town. Putting on my Catherine Gerard smile, I trampled in the shrubbery, ready to put on the performance of my life that I was happy, joyful and ready for anything that comes my way.
I remembered a lot of these moments as snippets of my life, but what I discovered is engrained inside my mind, like a painting that you viewed thousands of times. The turning point of who I was happened by the scene laid in front of me as a man, pressed against a woman up against a maple tree, was moving rhythmically with the sounds of his grunts. The woman giggling and moaning along, her hair more disheveled than mine, while also wrapping her legs around the man’s buttocks, which was bare-bottomed and flexing up against her.
I had never seen a scene like that and my face heated as I just witnessed what I would be doing as a married woman with my husband. Trying to come back the way I came, I backed up slowly, so I wouldn’t be caught during the middle of their lovemaking. Fate wasn’t on my side that day as I tripped backwards and stumbled to the dirt, not hiding my presence whatsoever. The woman’s eyes snapped open as she stared at me with shock, but it was the face that turned towards me that had my heart frozen in place.
His blond hair stuck to his forehead and his labored breathing didn’t make this man attractive, but I did know I would never forget seeing Aaron Gerard, as he made it perfectly clear how important I was to him.
Chapter 5
W ithout a moment's hesitation, I popped back up and ran away from the couple to head deeper into the woods. My mind felt cloudy and my breathing grew labored as I ran as quickly as I could towards the boundaries of Cromerth. I needed to ignore what I had seen. I heard rustling behind me and, with the last of my strength, pushed my weak legs forward, hoping to lose the person behind me. Without even realizing it, I made it to the boundary and not even a moment before I could stop, Aaron Gerard was right by my side, heaving alongside me, staring at me with a face I couldn’t read.
When we both stopped our panting and was able to stand up straight, Aaron Gerard faced me with a stony face, one that I never saw on him before.
“So, Lisbeth. This is not the way I wanted to introduce myself to you,” he whispered softly, almost like he was talking to a skittish rabbit.
“Not the way I wanted to meet you either,” I answered, trying to calm my thumping heart.
He eyed me up and down, and I knew I looked like a mess. I just hoped he didn’t focus on that. “So, you know…” He scratched his head, buying himself time.
I waited patiently for him to speak, not sure where he was going with this. “I hope you aren’t offended by what you just saw, I was just getting bachelorhood out of my system, you know, er, before we become committed together, for the rest of our days.”
“So, you choose Lucille Anderson, a married woman with a newborn, to get bachelorhood out of your system.” I scoffed, not afraid to hide what I thought of his declaration. My dream of finding companionship within my betrothed flitted away as quickly as it did when I dreamed it up. I felt truly angry at the predicament I was in.
“Well… yes,” he started out, trying to take a step closer to me.
I jumped back, not wanting to be anywhere near the man. He sighed, looking up and down my disheveled dress, his beauty nowhere near matching my own as the sun enlightened his blonde hair.
“Might as well get with someone who is already committed and won’t be sniffing around me when we are married, you know.”
I scoffed again at his words and looked away when I saw a look of irritation flash his eyes, reminding me that he wanted nothing to do with me.
He tried taking another step towards me, and I scurried backwards, this time hitting the barrier that held us inside for the many centuries that we came to know Cromerth.
Seeing my predicament, he rushed up and stood in front of me, making me feel like Mrs. Anderson pinned up against the tree. I felt my mouth drop open, my instinct to scream but Aaron Gerard covered it with his sweaty hand. I felt trapped and only prayed that this man, my betrothed, would go easy on me.I started to breathe in shallow breaths, trying to ignore smelling the sweat from his hands and his look of anger as he cornered me.
“Here is what we are going to do, my future wife,” he whispered, not hiding any uncertainty anymore. “You will not tell a soul what you saw today. When the month hits, you will be a blushing bride, and I will be your dashing groom. We will live in civility and peace, but you will be understanding when I want to do things on my own and you will get the same respect when you are keeping our house. Do you understand?”
Numbed by his statements, I nodded, and he slowly let go of my mouth, but still had me pinned to the barrier. I took a deep breath of fresh air and turned to look up at his face to better understand what he was hinting at. He obviously wanted Mrs. Anderson to be his companion, but we all knew the rules if he got caught, especially if you are already married. I also know that he does not really want me to be his wife, but that led me to wonder why put his name in for me in the first place. I knew it was a risk, but I had to ask my questions, even if it led to abuse the way I believe this man is capable of.
“I understand,” I whispered, feeling sweat on my brow. “I think, though, I at least deserve some explanations before we have our fairy-tale ending.”
He looked at me, seeing if I was mocking him before taking a step back.
I pushed myself off the barrier, relieved I could stand on my own two feet again.
“Fire away,” he decided, crossing his arms to prepare my inquiry.
I nodded and gathered my thoughts. Before I began he spoke up once more “Just three questions for now, Lucille is probably wondering where I am, and I don’t want to leave her too long.” I cringed at the words but gathered my three most important questions and fired away at him.
“When you say civility and peace, what are you implying?” I asked first. I knew what he meant, but I wanted to make sure that next month, we were clear on each other's roles from the beginning.
“Easy, we will live together but not see each other. Unless my blasted mother tells us to have kids, I only need you to do your wifely duties of cleaning and cooking and I will do my husband duties for appearances sake, but that’s it. I don’t need you for anything else.”
“So, I will basically be your servant,” I said, just to clarify his meaning.
“Precisely,” he said, not looking at me when he said it. “It’s just a show. We will both get a good deal out of it though—a perfect match.”
“So, my second question then is what will happen when you and Mrs. Anderson are caught?”
He chuckled at my question and brought his eyes back to mine. “We won’t get caught. We have been at it for quite a few years now, it hasn’t happened yet.”
“Except today,” I whispered, not afraid to show my courage.
I knew the rules were that if caught, the spouse that was cheated on gets to decide the fate of the person responsible for the disloyalty of the marriage. Mostly, they forgive, wives not able to live on their own without any trades to satisfy them, but the husbands usually could force them to do laborious work, or worse. Mr. Hiddleton had his wife killed by stoning. The only difficult issue with doing that is you would be unable to take another spouse if you kill them—you are only allowed one unless your spouse dies within five years of your marriage. You can only take a new spouse if you don’t have any children in your house. Looking at Aaron Gerard, he seemed not worried in the slightest about me announcing his infidelity to the town. It could be leverage but I decided to keep that to myself for now.
“You know what would happen if you told,” he hinted, a smile wide on his face. “My mother would never forgive you.”
I sighed internally, knowing he was right. My life would forever be ruined if I did announce to the world about Aaron Gerard’s secret.
“My last question then.” I took a deep breath, afraid to ask this one since it was more emotional than the last two questions I previously asked. “Why choose me as your wife?”
Aaron Gerard didn’t even hesitate to give me his answer. “My mother recommended I needed a wife. We looked at the possibilities that were coming this year and you were the only one that we had any leverage on. Your father wanted a new wife and you aren’t bad to look at. We also know that you will be obedient and not upset by the arrangement. I believe my mother is hoping we will become attached and I will forget Lucille, but just in case, she knows we can scare you into silence. Or so she told me. I trust my mother’s judgement so, here we are, dearly beloved.” He scoffed at the last two words, but my beating heart froze at his declaration of his choice over me.
“Thank you for your explanations.” I coughed, hoping my next words would come out louder. “I appreciate your time. Your secret is safe with me. I will see you at the ceremony.”
Without much more than a nod goodbye, Aaron Gerard turned around and started running back the way he came, to his one true love that waited for him in the woods.
My walk back into the woods became a blur. I faced so many obstacles with the outcome of my new adult life, I wasn’t sure if there was a way to save it anymore. All relationships seemed to have abandoned me because of the fate of the ritual and I was furious that I couldn’t move forward now without accepting that it was out of my hands now.
Not realizing where my feet were going, the barrier wall was my guide and I had never strayed from it. In anger, I ran up and started pounding on it, wishing for an escape. After a solid kick which I instantly regretted, a tear escaped me once again.
“I hate being like this,” I screamed at the barrier. “I have never felt such anger or confusion and it is all because of you!” I wiped my face again and looked beyond the barrier, the trees no different than ours. I pressed my face against it, the coldness calming me. “Please,” I whispered, taking a deep breath. “Free me from this place. I’ll do anything for freedom if it’s to myself. I need an escape. Please. Please. Please.”
I let the last of my tears fall, letting the words please keep leaving my lips. Once I felt emotionally prepared to leave, I pressed a hand to the barrier like a friend and turned to walk home.
Chapter 6
T he next week passed in a lonely blur of commotion. No one came to check in to see how I was doing and I didn’t reach out to follow up with any of the conversations that I had with those closest to me. I was too hurt to repair any relationships. I spent most of my time wandering along the barrier reading, trying to enjoy the last few days of freedom before my marriage.
With only three weeks before the wedding, our peddler arrived in town. Twice a year, Matthew Gilmore would ride up on his teetering wagon with his team of horses and provide relief and excitement over his wares. No one was entirely sure why or how this happened—that an outsider could come in and out as they pleased—but we were grateful that Matthew Gilmore and the others before him came at all to kindly provide things from the outside world.
I knew Abigail would be looking through his fabric later today and wished I could join her and her family to pick out the most beautiful cloth to create delectable pieces. I also know they were not going to be able to choose much the way their business has been.
Matthew Gilmore was the master of trading our valuables for his. He drove his team into the town center and smiled fondly at each prospective buyer as they bargained for his deals. Looking sweet and calm, his balding hair and peppered beard enticed many just to talk with him, but I knew most waited for his stories. They would be camping around his fire tonight to hear tales of the outside world. It was what we craved the most, these tales, and I got excited for the first time since the lottery for something new to break up my depressing routine.
Though I didn’t have anything to trade, I spent the day in the town square watching the exchanges happening. I saw everyone in the town come in groups of two or three, prepared to barter or trade with anyone who would listen. Catherine and Aaron stood by Matthew as they helped with the lines. Clara was with Wilson, looking stiff, looped arm in arm as he tried to trade some wooden statues, which he was so famous for. I saw Abigail with her parents and my father laughing boisterously among his friends, already appearing tipsy as they watched the people’s excitement. Like a shadow, I was ignored but got to enjoy the brightness from the people around me and it lifted my spirits just a fraction.
After a few hours, Matthew called for a rest and people started heading home for a few hours. Not having anywhere to go, I stayed seated in my spot, watching those depart until only a few stragglers stayed back, chatting among themselves. I got a nod from Catherine Gerard as she passed me, not hiding the smirk from her lips, while her son just scowled at me. I did my best to ignore both of them, not wanting to dwell on anything but this day.
An hour after Matthew’s announcement, I saw him leave his covered wagon and he eyed me suspiciously before walking over. My heart thrilled at the thought of talking to him and I nervously straightened out my dress, hoping I wasn’t too much of a mess.
