Love and Lies (Small Town Secrets Book 1), page 24
A few minutes later, Scott’s truck pulled up in the driveway. As he got out, my heartbeat picked up its pace. He’d always looked good in Bob’s white t-shirt, blue jeans uniform. “Been waiting long?”
“No.” The way my nerves felt, though, I’d have thought I’d been there for hours.
“Sorry about that. I had to cover for the new guy. I don’t think he’ll ever get to work on time.” I stood up as Scott found his house key on the ring. “Do you mind if I clean up a little?”
“Not at all. Do you care if I wait out here?”
“Go ahead. I’ll be back in a couple minutes.”
I leaned back against the step, once more drinking in the peaceful outdoors. When I’d lived in Winchester as a kid, I hadn’t appreciated how close we were to nature. In Denver, I’d been able to see the peaks of the Front Range, but they’d always seemed so far away. Now I was actually living in a mountainous environment, up close and personal, and failing to appreciate it. Instead of my life with Barry in the city, I enjoyed a small town where I could, anytime I chose, drive for ten to fifteen minutes and find myself surrounded by forest.
I inhaled deeply, trying to relax and not worry about anything, even the impending conversation. As I took in one comforting breath after another, I realized I felt better than I had in months. Even if Scott and I didn’t resolve anything, I felt more at peace with myself.
That was more important than anything else, and it was probably about time.
I was Casey Williams, survivor.
Scott came out as promised just a few minutes later, sitting next to me on the step.
“Sorry you had to deal with my psycho ex.”
His dark green eyes examined mine, and I wondered what he was thinking. “I got the feeling you’d seen him like that a million times before.”
I let out a long breath. “Yeah. But that time in my life is completely over.” And I knew it was. Barry hadn’t called once—not me or my parents—since that day. I reached over a tentative hand and touched the top of his. “I also wanted to apologize for leaving. I know I hurt you when I left, and I hurt you even more when I told you why. And I’m really sorry. I never meant to cause you any pain.”
“Don’t worry about it.” The way he tried to be cool and calm, pretending like it hadn’t bothered him, bruised my heart in a way I wouldn’t have thought possible. I squeezed the top of his hand, hoping he could feel what I needed him to, because I couldn’t find any words in my head that didn’t sound lame as hell.
We were quiet for a while as he turned his hand over to take mine in his, and I wondered if maybe that was a sign of forgiveness. I swallowed the saliva pooling in my mouth. “What were you wanting to talk about?”
He looked up at me from our hands. “I wanted to thank you.”
“Thank me? For what?”
The remnant of a smile that didn’t know how to cover his face appeared, never making it to his eyes. “Pain and Agony has a meeting with a label next week.”
“A record label?”
“Yeah.”
“So why are you thanking me?”
“Because you convinced me it was the thing to do. You know, get out of my own skin and do it. My band wants to thank you.”
A small smile appeared on my face. “No, it’s all you.” I dared to put a finger on his chest, emphasizing that the credit was not mine. “Can I tell you something?” I forced myself to look up into his eyes from my finger.
I couldn’t read him through those green orbs, but his voice sounded cautious. “Sure.”
I bit my lip, so afraid to say the words that needed to come out. Really, they were the only words that even mattered but that made them feel all the heavier on my tongue. Fear also weighed me down, because I had no idea how he would respond. But it was the only thing left for me to say and I could close this door after spitting it out if I needed to. “I love you.”
His eyes softened then and I saw him swallow. “What did you say?”
“I love you, Scott.” He didn’t respond, but it was too late. I’d broken the dam and it was all going to gush out. “I’ve never loved anyone, never will love anyone, like I love you. It was fucking stupid to not tell you before. And I understand if we’re still through, but…” My mouth froze with the feeling that maybe I’d gone too far.
Jesus fucking Christ. What was he thinking?
He put his arms around my shoulders and pulled me close, but he still didn’t say anything. Without seeing his face, I had no idea what his thoughts were. His body up against mine felt right but I had no visual confirmation. I couldn’t see his expression and he hadn’t said a word. Inside, I could feel a tsunami brewing as I wondered if I was on the verge of bursting with laughter or tears.
When he pulled away enough to sear me with his eyes, he examined my every feature. “You’re not just saying that, are you?”
“No. I mean it. I love you. And I was stupid not telling you everything. I know that now. I was just…afraid.”
As I fought back tears, he brushed my cheek with his knuckles. “Casey, there’s no turning back. If you love me—if you’re going to commit to me—then I expect you to do it all the way. No more running off, no more keeping secrets from me.” I couldn’t speak, just nodded, waiting for what he’d say next. His voice tender, he whispered, “I love you, too, Casey.” I kissed him then, letting myself drown in overwhelming emotion.
He took one of my hands in his again and kept his eyes focused on them. “Look…I don’t want you to be scared anymore. I don’t want us to be stupid anymore, either.” He looked in my eyes then. “You know David’s gonna move in with Gerald, right? Well, I was thinking maybe, maybe…we could, uh, start over, but…” He took a deep breath. “Maybe we could…try something different.” Holy shit. There was no mistaking he was nervous as hell, and I squeezed his hand, hoping to remove some of his anxiety, because I’d never seen Scott tongue-tied like this. “I don’t know what you’re comfortable with. I just… I’ve been fucked over in the past when I thought someone loved me, and I don’t want that to happen again. I just need to know this is for real.”
“Scott, this is real.” I touched his stubbly cheek with my free hand. “But are you asking what I think you’re asking?”
His eyes sparkled. “What if I am?”
I grinned, feeling a sense of déjà vu. “Because if you’re not, I guess I’m going to have to think of something else to say. But if you’re asking me to move in with you, I just might have to kiss you.”
To that, his whole face beamed. “Then kiss me.”
He didn’t have to tell me twice. My lips touched his and, as he responded, I felt his complete forgiveness and love wash over me. Everything was all right. Actually, no. It was more than all right.
It was perfect.
“Yes. Yes, I will.” I gave him a tiny peck on the lips. “I promise I will be completely honest with you from now on. Forever.”
I gazed in his eyes and I could almost see the forever I was dreaming of, many good years together, maybe even full of children and grandchildren, but definitely full of happiness and more than I could even imagine. “If I move in with all my shit, though, you’ll probably want to use David’s old room to store your drums.”
“Yeah, but you’ll need room for your artwork, too. How about we split it?”
“Deal,” I said, holding out my hand to shake. Laughing, he grabbed it and then pulled me into an affirming kiss. It was a kiss that said forever, and that was all I needed to know.
* * *
Scott’s kiss was sizzling and I let my fingers wind through his hair when we heard a knock on the door. “Five minutes.”
Letting go of my lips, Scott sighed. “Fuck.”
I squeezed his ass, relishing the feel of leather. “We’ll just have to resume this later.”
He took a deep breath through his nostrils but then nuzzled my neck. “I don’t know how the fuck I let you talk me into this.”
“Into what?”
“Recording an album.”
“And it’s, like, the best fucking album ever. You guys needed to be heard by the world.”
“Yeah, but now I have this fucking tour…”
“And they love you.”
He lifted his head, touching his forehead to mine. “And you’re here, just like you promised.”
“Exactly.”
There was another rap at the door. Scott sighed and shook his head, letting go of me and walking across the dressing room. When he opened the door, Lee and Dom stood at the door. “You ready?”
“Norm just said five minutes.”
“Close enough.”
Dom looked at the fresh ink on Scott’s forearm, the tattoo he’d had done based on my artwork in the show last fall. It was a pair of lips shaped like mine with two pairs of Xs and Os being blown from them. “Think you could draw me something, Case?”
Lee grinned. “I think she should come up with a better band logo than the studio did for us. ‘N then we could all get it tattooed on our backs.”
“You know this tattoo was like the tamest thing my girl’s ever done, right?”
“Yeah, I’ve seen her far-out stuff. But you know what? I trust her to do us right.”
“Let’s go, guys.”
As Lee and Dom left the room, Scott squeezed my hand. “Yeah, I think I trust you, too.”
“You think?”
Laughing, he took my hand and led me down the hallway of this new venue, heading toward the stage. “I know. Just be with me forever, and I can do anything.”
Indeed. And so could I. I emblazoned this moment on my mind in the crowded space of our happy forever.
THE END
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
“Nobody puts Baby in a corner.” While you’re more likely to see Jade headbanging than Dirty Dancing, she—like Baby—won’t be put in a corner…or a box. So even though you can’t really stick her books in one genre, you could say she mostly writes steamy Contemporary Romance—and, while you’re at it, you’ll notice in her stories that Jade freaking loves Colorado, hard music, coffee, bad words, and CHOCOLATE!!! And so do her characters.
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Jade C. Jamison, Love and Lies (Small Town Secrets Book 1)
