Infinite Stratos, Volume 5, page 6
“What?!”
“Open wide.”
Nom. A bite of food filled Houki’s mouth. As if shocked by the suddenness, she sat down and began to chew. Maybe she was just conditioned to think that eating while standing up was rude. I guess.
“Well? Is it any good?”
“Definitely. This beef stew is wonderful.”
“Oh dear. You flatter me.”
The other girls were as surprised by this turn of events as Houki and I were.
“Would everyone like to try some?”
“Well, uh—”
“S-Sure.”
“Yes, please.”
“Well, well. Looks like I’m popular today.”
Tatenashi fed the other girls with a pleased smile on her face. The food was delicious, and we were being hand-fed by the beautiful student council president. Our own expressions that lunchtime must have been indescribable.
◇
Example three.
Phew... That was exhausting... Especially the parts involving Tatenashi. For someone so playful, her training was incredibly strict. And she wasn’t angry when I failed, so I couldn’t even resent that. It just made me feel like a failure. Anyway, practice had ended, and I was taking a shower in my room before dinner.
“Hmm-hmm.”
I showered my hair, rinsed it off, then stretched my hand out of the shower, reaching for my towel. Huh? That’s funny. Where’d it go? Click.
“Hi! I’m here to wash your back!”
“Wh—?!”
Tatenashi, in a swimsuit, had suddenly opened the shower door. The deep indigo of the school swimsuit barely held in her curves. Her swelling breasts, especially, looked as if they could pop out at any—wait, I was naked!
“What are you doing?!”
“Washing your back.”
“That’s not what I meant! Don’t look at me!”
“No need to be shy. You can let it all hang out.”
“I don’t want to! And why are you trying to cram yourself into this tiny room?”
“Hmm. To be closer?”
Don’t answer in the form of a question!
“Please, just get out of here!”
“Don’t say that...”
Something pressed on my back. I tensed up as I felt her breasts rub on my back through her swimsuit.
“Ahg! No! Please, just get out of here! This is really bothering me!”
“Bzzt. You’re such a buzzkill sometimes.”
“This isn’t about— Ah!”
I felt a hand reach around me and start to trace a pattern on my chest. My voice became ragged as the sensation started to take over my mind.
“Seriously, Tatenashi! Knock it off—”
“I’ll leave after I wash your back.”
“.........” There was no resisting her. “Fine, fine. Do whatever you want.”
“Why thank you!”
You’re the one who forced me into it... Slumping forward, I let her wash my back in the tiny shower.
“Is anywhere itchy?”
“No.”
“That’s too bad.”
What kind of response was that? A sponge laden with body soap, no doubt Tatenashi’s, lathered up my back with just the right amount of pressure. How many years had it been since I’d let someone wash my back? Probably since Chifuyu did it for me when I was little.
Mmm... I forced myself to not think anymore about Chifuyu. If I did, I’d think about how we bathed together too, and that was somewhere I didn’t want to go right now.
“Your body is amazing, Ichika. You don’t just lift, you work all your muscles.”
“Thanks, I guess.”
“You used to do kendo, right? How about now?”
“Nah, I’ve been out of it for a while. Houki absolutely smashed me just recently.”
“Houki, huh. She’s a pretty impressive girl. I can really tell how hard she pushes herself. Just like me.”
“Are you sure about that?”
“Aww, don’t be mean. I’m a hard worker. It definitely isn’t from talent.”
“You can keep saying that, but...”
“Hmph. If you’re not gonna believe me, then... How about this?!”
A soapy hand began to scratch at my armpit. It was even more effective than before.
“Ahahahahaha! Stop... Please, stop...”
“Tee-hee. See what you get for doubting me? Trust me instead, okay?”
“Sure! Fine! Understood! Just sto— Ahahahahah!”
“Okay. Anyway, I’m getting out, now that your back’s washed.” She stepped back briskly, rinsed the lather from herself, and opened the door. On her wait out she stopped and called out to me, “Ichika.”
“...What?”
“You’ve got a nice tight butt.”
Tatenashi left the room giggling. I couldn’t see her expression, but I’m sure it was a jaunty smirk.
“.........”
I turned down the temperature and raised the shower head above me to, quite literally, cool my head.
“That’s cold!”
Of course it was.
◇
“Ahh...”
The usual crowd looked on with wry smiles as I slumped over the table. It was dinner time in the dining hall, but I wasn’t hungry at all. Tatenashi had been running me ragged for the past few days, and I was exhausted.
“You’re really working yourself hard, Ichika.”
“Oh... Charl...”
“Would you like some tea? If you’re not going to eat, you should at least drink.”
“Oh... Thanks.”
I lifted up my head to manage at least a sip. Everyone was enjoying their varied dinners. But I wasn’t hungry at all... If I kept this up, it was going to kill me. Probably by starvation.
“So, where is that woman?”
Laura was a little bit prickly. Ever since she lost against Tatenashi, she’d been on edge. Her failed attempts to sneak into my room just worsened her mood further. I was kind of grateful to Tatenashi for that, at least, but... Nothing good can come of Laura being this moody. I slowly thought it over, in my haze. The tea Charl gave me was warm and relaxing.
“Ichika. I asked you, where is that woman?”
“Hm? She said she had student council stuff to do.”
“Yeah... There’s a ton of paperwork piled up,” came a relaxed drawl. I slowly turned toward the direction it came from, and sure enough, it was Miss Casual. C’mon, you’re the student council secretary. You should be helping out with that.
“You know, if I’m there, she ends up with even more to do. So I figured I’d get out from underfoot, kind of,” she continued.
“Don’t talk yourself down like that.”
I was kind of worried about the student council, if that’s how its upper echelons worked. Anyway, though, I was curious about what she’d picked for dinner, and it turned out to be ochazuke. Ochazuke with a big filet of salmon perched like on top. That was a bit showy for someone like her.
“So, how do you like ochazuke? With green tea? A nice rich black tea? Personally, I like oolong.” She sat down in an empty seat and struck up a conversation. As she spoke, her chopsticks moved quickly, mixing up the bowl. “Oh, and I like to add this.”
“This?”
“An egg.”
Plop. Did she really just put an egg in?
“Mix, mix, mix...” There was a warm smile of anticipation on Miss Casual’s face as the dish turned even gluier. I definitely wasn’t hungry after that. “Here I go. Schlurrrrp...”
“Umm. You don’t have to make that much noise when you eat.”
“Aww, yeah I do! You’re supposed to slurp!”
“That’s for soba noodles!”
“Okay, okay, I’ll try. Sluuurp.”
Sigh. At least it was a little quieter. Anyway, what was I thinking about again?
“Ahem. Ichika?”
“Huh? What is it, Cecilia? Why so formal?”
“If you can no longer bear to be in that room, I simply must offer, as a matter of both honor and mercy, my own instead.”
Oh, the room with one big bed and very little else.
“Hey, wait, Cecilia! Hold it right there. Ichika, you should come to my room. I have playing cards!” said Rin, a bit too excitedly.
“What do you think I am, an elementary schooler?”
“I have rock candy too.”
“A preschooler, then?!”
It just got worse and worse. Rin, sometimes I really don’t get you.
“How about popcorn, then?”
“A pigeon?!”
Just... whatever. All this was doing was wearing me out even more.
“I’m going back to my room.”
Glumly, I stood up and walked out of the cafeteria. At least I could get a nap in before Tatenashi gets back, I thought. I turned the doorknob, looking forward to that faint solace.
“Welcome back. Would you like a bath? Dinner? Or maybe... Me?”
Two seconds after I turned the knob, I heard Tatenashi. The sheer dejection made me crumple to my knees.
Chapter III: Glass-Clear Chord of Cinderellas’ Slippers
Finally, it was the day of the school festival. It wasn’t open to the public, so there wouldn’t be fireworks or anything, but emotionally everyone there was about to explode.
“Seriously? Class 1’s having Ichika as a host?”
“He’ll be in a butler’s tuxedo and everything!”
“And I heard you get to play a game with him.”
“If you win, you get a photo with him! Just him and you! There’s no way I’m gonna miss that!”
Class 1-A’s ‘Servant Café’ was packed as soon as it opened. I’m the only one really getting worked hard, though. Everyone else is just having fun.
“Welcome! Right this way, madam.”
The happiest was probably Charl, wearing a maid’s uniform, who’d had a wide grin on her face all day. Probably because I told her it looked good on her. I didn’t expect her to get that pumped up about it though. The hosts and hostesses—that is, the group in cosplay—were me, Charl, Cecilia, and unexpectedly, Houki and Laura. I guess Laura makes sense since it was her idea, but I’m surprised Houki gave in. I never would have expected it in a million years. She looks so sour as she leads people in. Especially when they ask how long the line is for me. Is she getting enough calcium? Anyway, uhh...
Watching them all work in their maid uniforms was really getting me excited in a way I couldn’t quite pin down. Dan always used to say: “Maid uniforms, school swimsuits, and bloomers! If those don’t turn you on, turn in your man card!” Perhaps there was some validity to that. Maybe. Hmm. Anyway, the rest of the class was split into two groups. One was cooking, and the other was taking care of everything else. They were kept busy with stuff like getting ingredients when we ran out and bussing tables. The hardest of their tasks, though, was dealing with the huge line that had formed in the hallway.
“I’ve been waiting two hours already!”
“Don’t worry. We’ll be open for the whole school festival.”
Dealing with all the complaints—most of which seemed to be about the wait time—looked like hard work. The line’s already pretty long. Are we gonna make it through the day? As I pondered it, I looked out past them to the hall.
“I’m the end of the line.”
“What games do they do?”
“It looks like rock-paper-scissors, Concentration, and darts. So if you’re not good at any one of them, you can pick something you’re better at.”
“We’re still waiting?”
The hall outside the first year classrooms was a lake, a sea, an ocean of people. I could only imagine the trepidation everyone else in the class felt looking out at it.
“Look! There’s Orimura!”
Dammit! They saw me! As soon as I realized it, the crew handling the line moved to shoo me back into the classroom.
“We told you, no leaving!”
“Look at the mess you’re making!”
“Everyone needs to get their chance.”
Huh? Just how many people was ‘everyone’?
“Don’t worry about it, just get back in there!”
I couldn’t argue with that. So I didn’t.
“You, there, butler. Show me to my table.”
That sounds like— I knew that harsh tone. I knew that just-a-little-bitchy word choice. I turned around, and sure enough, it was Rin, but...
“What are you staring at?”
It was Rin in a qipao. The traditional dress was sewn from a single piece of cloth, cut to a skirt, with slits which rose daringly high. On its crimson fabric, a dragon sprawled forth. Its seams and hems were painstakingly detailed in gold.
“Seriously, stop it! It’s just because my class is doing a Chinese-style café!”
“Oh? You have dim sum?”
“They made me be the waitress, and I don’t even get to do anything because everyone’s coming here!” My second childhood friend was a bit resentful.
“Really? Oh, hey. That’s not your normal hairstyle. What do you call those buns?”
“Ugh, they’re called chignon.”
“Yeah, those. They look good on you.”
“Uh. Well, I mean, they are the traditional Chinese style.”
Huh? Why couldn’t she take a compliment?
“Anyway! Show me to my table!”
“Sure, sure. Right this way, madam.”
“Mada—?!”
“All of our customers are called that.”
“Hmph! I guess if they’re making you call people that, you have to. As long as they’re making you do it.”
What’s that supposed to mean? It was a bit naive of a question, but I thought it over as I lead Rin to an empty table. The furniture, by the way, was far beyond what you’d expect for a school festival. Cecilia had supplied it, and I especially had to wonder just how much tables and chairs cost. And the tea sets, too. I could see the cooks trying their hardest not to slip.
“So, madam. What will your order be?”
“Well...”
Rin squirmed in her seat, apparently unused to such fancy furniture. After settling down, she turned her attention to the menu. Of course, it’s impolite to force our customers to hold the menu themselves, so it fell to us to hold it for them. It was a little bit scary how quickly I got used to it...
“What’s the ‘Reward for the Butler’ meal?”
“Um... May I interest you in one of our cakes?”
“Don’t change the subject.”
“My apologies.”
“Stop being so stiff. It feels creepy.”
“Wha— Who are you calling creepy?! This is what butlers do!”
“A butler? Then I’ll take the ‘Reward for the Butler’ meal.”
“Well, uh... Perhaps you’d like to try the ‘Reward for the Maid’ meal?”
“Ichika. This meal involves you, doesn’t it.”
I nervously hiccuped and replied, “You have such a wit, my lady.”
“If you’re going to be that subservient, then actually listen to what I say! I want the ‘Reward for the Butler’ meal.”
I couldn’t say no to those upturned eyes for a third time. I had to go along with it. Though she seemed to be pretty embarrassed by it, too. Was it just because of the name? C’mon, Rin. There’s far worse. You haven’t even gotten to things like the ‘Song of a Nightingale by the Lake’ or ‘Echoes of Romance in the Deep Forest.’ Ugh, just repeating those back made me feel weird.
“One ‘Reward for the Butler’ meal, then. It will be just a moment.”
I bowed deeply, from the hips, and stepped away from the madam—from Rin. There was no need for me to carry the order to the kitchen, though. I was wearing a lapel mic disguised as a brooch. That’s the kind of thing only a woman would think of.
“Here you go.”
Reaching the kitchen, I was handed the ‘Reward for the Butler’ meal. It was an iced herbal tea and a package of Pocky, for only 300 yen. Our customers’ smiles were a greater treasure than any gold. Yet still, I was filled with trepidation as I made my way back to the table where the girl in the qipao awaited.
“My apologies for the wait, madam.”
“Mm. I suppose I can forgive it, once or twice.”
Jeez. Getting a bit too into the role, there. And still not quite nailing it.
“Now, if you’ll pardon me.”
“Eh?”
I sat facing Rin across the table for two. Me in my tuxedo, her in her qipao... was how the scene was set.
“Why are you sitting down? Oh well, it doesn’t matter.”
“Allow me to explain.”
“Oh? As you will.”
“Ugh! I can’t do this! Rin, can we just talk normally?”
“Ahahah. You were talking a bit funny there. Very well.”
Oh, like you weren’t?
“What is this meal? It looks like just a snack and a drink.”
“The thing with it is, you’re allowed to feed me.”
“What?”
“That’s why it’s ‘for the butler.’”
Rin blinked, and her cheeks flushed bright red. After a moment she stuttered out, “S-So what is this? I have to pay to feed you?”
“Unfortunately, we don’t take cancellations. That’s why I wasn’t so hot on it.”
“No, just, um... Since I ordered it...” Her voice sank into a mumble.
“What’s wrong, Rin? It’s up to you. You don’t have to feed me if you don’t want to. I can just leave.”
“Eh? No, that’d be a waste! Just this once, I suppose I’ll give you your reward.”
Huh? It’s not like I was that excited about it, either. Rin picked up a stick of Pocky and pointed it at me. As she looked off to the side she said, “Here’s your reward. Say ‘ahh.’”
“Don’t look away like that, all the other girls are looking. If you’re too embarrassed, we don’t have to go through with this.”
“I-I’ll do it! I said I’d do it! Jeez! Give me what I paid for!”
“Okay. You don’t have to get so angry.”
“All right. Say ‘ahh.’”
“Ahh.”
The sound of it snapping as I bit down echoed in my mouth. It was served in a chilled parfait glass, so rather than melting immediately, the chocolate stayed as a light film between my tongue and the pretzel. Only a few seconds later did it fill my palate.
