Gateway (The Gateway Trilogy, Book 1), page 16
I was munching corn flakes when what sounded like a herd of elephants came down the stairs, and Kat burst into the kitchen.
“Do not do that to me again,” she said, stopping short when she saw me. “You almost gave me a heart attack.”
“Sorry,” I said. “I was hungry and it looked like you were going to sleep for awhile.”
“You move, I move,” she said, grabbing a mug from the cupboard. “That's how this is going to work until I get you safely back to the Institute.”
“Got it,” I said.
“How's your mom doing?” she asked.
“I'm not sure yet. If history is any indication, she'll probably spend most of the day in bed. After that… if she stays off of her meds, things will only get worse.”
I knew my tone was matter-of-fact, and it wasn't that I didn't care, I had just seen it all before. There were only so many times I could get my hopes up. Still, I was grateful for the good time we'd had the day before, and glad Kat had seen her that way, and not just the other.
It was after eleven and I was expected back at the Institute by one. When we’d finished breakfast, Kat and I worked on packing. She was concerned with clothing, I was more concerned with art supplies, books, and finding my iPod. Kat informed me that until I was second year I wouldn't be allowed to bring my cell phone and to be prepared to have my bags searched once I got back. First year students were considered too fragile to have unregulated contact with the outside world. By the time we'd filled my oversized duffle and a backpack, it was time to leave.
After we loaded my things into the car, I went back inside to say goodbye to my mother. I knew she wouldn't want to see Kat right now, and Kat seemed to understand.
I knocked, but when there was no answer, I entered my mother's room. She was snoring softly. She'd passed out, fully clothed on top of her comforter.
“Hey, Mom” I said, kneeling beside her bed, “it's time for me to get going.”
Her eyes fluttered open. “So soon? Can't you stay another day?” Her voice was husky with sleep.
“No, I'm sorry. But I'll come back soon.” I felt guilty making a promise I wasn't sure I could keep, but I wanted to avoid a scene.
She groped until she found my hand and squeezed it. “I can call them, the people at the Institute. I'll tell them I'll bring you back tomorrow. What's one day?”
I shook my head. “I've got to go, Mom. I love you.”
“Please don't leave me,” she said, her voice cracking. “If you leave you're not ever coming back. I need you, Em.”
She did. I knew she did. But I also knew the Institute needed me. And not for selfish reasons, but because together we needed to find a way to lock the Gateway again, lest the world be overrun by demons. The breaches would only get worse; when I connected to the Gate I had sensed how weak it was. It was only a matter of time before it failed completely. I couldn't let that happen, even if it meant breaking my mother's heart in order to save her life.
I pulled my hand away. “I'm going, Mom. I love you, but I'm going.”
I stood and walked to the door. Her sobs were quiet, each one pricking my heart. I imagined her face buried in the pillow, but I didn't turn back. I shut the door behind me.
***
By the time I got into the car I'd wiped my eyes of tears, but they felt puffy. I'm sure Kat could sense I wasn't up for conversation and we made the drive back to the Institute in relative silence.
Winding up Laurel Canyon I was focused on nothing but keeping out the voices and the motion sickness. For the most part it worked, and as we approached the front gate I felt proud of myself.
Three Guardians stepped in front of Kat's car as we approached the guard shack. All looked worse for the wear.
“Where have you been, Kat?” one of them asked when he recognized her. “We needed you last night.”
“What happened? Was there another breach?” Her tone was anxious.
“During the ritual. Why weren't you here?” the Guardian answered.
“What ritual? What are you talking about?” Kat sounded as confused as I felt.
“To re-seal the Gateway. The Elders called upon every Keeper, every Guardian, and every student to help. Word went out at dinner. Everyone was there except you and Taren. And her, I guess.” He pointed to me and a chill ran down my spine.
My mind raced with thoughts faster than I could pluck them out of the air. I'd spoken with Annys and Master Dogan around two, was it possible it hadn't been planned yet? If so, why wouldn't they have called us back?
“Who was hurt? Did we lose anyone?” Kat asked.
“With so many Guardians there, we didn't lose anyone, but dozens were injured. At least three-dozen more hostiles escaped and the Gate is in worse shape than ever. You really didn't know about this?”
“If I had known, don't you think I'd have been here, Adam?”
She slapped the steering wheel and cursed.
A conclusion was solidifying in my mind, making it impossible to think there was any explanation other than Annys and Master Dogan not wanting me present at this ritual. It made no sense. I was their best chance at repairing the Gateway; they themselves had told me as much. Why was I training so hard, otherwise? Why was I leaving my mother to cry alone if I was just going to be pushed aside? Anger welled up from deep within me and I clenched and unclenched my fists. I pulled on the door handle and strode out of the car.
“Ember, where are you going?” I heard Kat jump out the car, heard her footsteps behind me.
“I'm going to talk to some Elders,” I said, quickening my pace.
Perhaps we should talk first.
I'll deal with you later, I told the Voice, pushing it aside.
Wrong.
Chapter 21
I was falling, tumbling through endless darkness, being pulled by a force stronger than gravity. Just when I was sure I would fall forever I landed, face down, the impact reverberating through me. It took a moment before I could move. Was my back broken? I was sure my cheek had shattered. But when I was able to lift my head and probe it with my fingertips it seemed intact. I struggled to sit back on my heels.
I was in a dark wasteland, the only light an eerie glow that filtered through the blackest clouds I'd ever seen. Wind whipped at my hair and blew an acrid smoke into my nostrils that made me double over in a fit of coughing. It subsided only to be replaced by retching. What came up wasn't the cereal I'd eaten for breakfast but a tar-black slime that continued to coat my mouth no matter how much I spit. It tasted how I imagined a rotting corpse would smell. A scream ripped through the landscape followed by a crunch that sounded like bones and I turned, wild-eyed, searching for a place to hide.
BEAUTIFUL, ISN'T IT? YOU CAN SEE WHY I AM SO DESPERATE TO LEAVE.
The Voice crushed down upon my mind, allowing no other thought. I clutched at my temples, panting. Time passed differently in this dimension and I had no way of knowing how long I'd really been here. Was Kat already racing to find someone to do a Retrieval or had I not even collapsed to the ground yet in the human dimension?
IT ISN'T THE HUMAN'S DIMENSION. IT BELONGS TO THE DAEMONS. IT WAS STOLEN FROM US AND NOW IS THE TIME TO TAKE IT BACK.
I howled in pain and had to stop myself from beating my head against the cracked earth. I had to hold on. It couldn't be much longer, it couldn't—
YOU WILL NOT GO BACK UNTIL I RELEASE YOU. AND I WILL NOT RELEASE YOU UNTIL YOU HAVE SEEN.
My mouth hung open and my throat contracted, but no more sound came out. There was no voice left in me, none but It.
The landscape around me shifted and blurred and I thought I might be flying, until I realized that I remained on my hands and knees gripping the dirt. It was my surroundings that were moving.
Just as abruptly it stopped, and I found myself in the passenger seat of a car. I couldn't will myself to move; I was just an observer in this body, not the animating force. We pass a small market and I know we’re traveling through Laurel Canyon.
“I wish you would tell me what's bothering you,” a male voice says.
I turn to see a handsome man in his mid-forties with a salt and pepper beard. “It's nothing, honey, I'm fine.” The voice isn't mine, but I know it passes through the lips of the person whose body I'm inhabiting.
“It's not nothing, you toss and turn all night, lately. Are you having nightmares again?” The man's face is etched with concern.
“No,” I say, “it's just headaches. I made an appointment with Dr. Wilson to get checked out, but I'm sure there's nothing to worry about.” I reach across and rest my hand on his leg, giving it a squeeze. I look up to see the Institute coming into view. A Guardian steps out of the guard shack.
“Morning, Richard, Gretchen. Have a good shift,” he says and hits the code for the gate to open.
The world spun and for a moment I was back in the wasteland, back in my own body. But then—
I'm pacing back and forth in a dining room.
“You're being completely irrational. You're not making any sense,” Richard says. He's seated at the table, his expression pleading.
I stop pacing. “Stop calling me irrational! I know what I saw.” My voice booms.
Richard stands and grabs me by the shoulders. “Gretchen, listen to me, please. This isn't you talking. I can feel you slipping away. We have to get some help.”
Again my surroundings blurred, the motion making me queasy.
I'm in Master Dogan's office. All of the Elders, including Annys are gathered around his table. They're tense—eyes tight, posture stiff.
“It's not that we don't have sympathy for what you're going through,” says a female Elder with dark hair, grey streaking her temples, “we just have no one to replace you yet.”
“The centers are always the hardest to find, as you know,” says a plump man with thinning hair, “but we are trying.”
“Three more are due to graduate in the summer,” Annys says. “Surely you can wait until then to take a leave of absence.”
Master Dogan is studying me with his tranquil eyes.
“I have an idea to mitigate your exposure,” he says, “if you and Richard are willing.”
The world lurched.
I'm in a bathroom, fumbling with a bottle of Ibuprofen. I hear running bath water. My hands are shaking, my head pounds. At last, I unscrew the cap and pour four tablets into my palm then toss them back with a sip of water. I lean against the counter until I stop shaking. I pull off my robe and step into the steaming bath, so hot it's painful. I sink in slowly, getting acclimated. I soak long enough for the bath to have cooled. The throbbing in my head recedes, leaving a dull ache. Back in my robe, I exit the bathroom to see Richard reading in bed.
I slide under the covers next to him and lean against his chest. He's reading Hemingway.
“How are you feeling?” he asks.
“Better,” I say. “I haven't had a headache since we got here.”
The scene shifted and—
I'm entering what looks like a grand ballroom. The floor is tiled in a beautiful mosaic, the walls decorated with rich tapestries. The room is circular, with a wooden staircase leading to a balcony that rings the entirety. I'm holding Richard's hand and he gives me kiss before going to stand against the wall with other Guardians. I walk to the center of the room and look down. I'm standing on the center tile of the Gateway.
The time is now.
No, comes my mental response. Not now, not ever. Eight others surround me, dressed in the same white robe I wear. We all take our seats. I close my eyes and see a beautiful ball of golden light pulsating at my third eye. I'm reaching out, ready to form the link.
You know what I'll do to you.
It doesn't matter. I will never help you.
The first connection slides into place. A ribbon of energy pulsates between us. The second connection is made and I exhale.
It's only going to get worse.
Stop it! The thought is loud in my head and the connections break, sending shooting pain through my body. I open my eyes. There is shock on the faces of the other Keepers.
“I'm sorry,” I say. “Let's begin again.”
I form the links hastily, one after the next. There's nothing elegant about it, but my heart is racing, my palms sweating; I'm afraid to go slowly. The strength of the symbol buoys me. I'm relaxing, the tension leaves my shoulders, my breath deepens. I feel myself at the center, connecting all of us together.
You will help me.
The link wavers, but I struggle to hang on. I don't respond to the Voice. It requires all of my focus to keep the connection, now.
Are you surprised, Gretchen, that I can reach you even now? Do you think yourself safe when you link with these humans?
Perspiration beads on my forehead. My teeth grind with effort.
Do you think there is anywhere you can go that I cannot find you?
The connection slips a fraction but I regain it. I'm swaying now.
It's no use fighting it. You will help me destroy the Gateway and release—
NO! The thought consumes my mind, blocking out all other sensations. I WILL NEVER HELP YOU. NOT. EVER!!!
I push back against the Demon with everything I have. Too late I realize what I've done. The link is severed; the eight lights pulsating around me wink out. My eyes fly open to see the other Keepers knocked backward. The Guardians at the wall rush forward, but the earth shakes violently below us. They struggle to keep their footing. Looking down I notice the tiniest of cracks appear.
“No!” I scream as it spreads, spidering in different directions.
The other Keepers haven't stirred other than being shaken by the force that feels like an earthquake but isn't. The center tile is splitting beneath me. I feel my insides threatening to erupt. I cry out in agony as the pain overwhelms me, paralyzes me. It's Richard who grabs my arm and hauls me out of the way as a gaping hole opens where I'd been just seconds before.
The other Guardians reach the Keepers and drag them back from the ever-widening maw.
“Run, Gretchen!” Richard is standing, sword drawn, balancing on the shifting floor.
The rumbling slows, and from the hole comes a mass of demons, clawing their way to freedom. The Guardians hack and slash at the monsters. An alarm sounds, barely audible over the clash of battle. The demons are coming in torrents, raining down upon the Guardians. We're outnumbered, but the demons seem more interested in fleeing than fighting. They stream toward the doors only to be met by the now rallied forces. The Guardians make easy meat of them, but they keep coming.
I squeeze my eyes shut. I imagine the symbol, glowing bright. Not just the center this time, but the whole Gateway. The ribbon of energy pulsates throughout my body. I am the Gateway—pieces fragmented, but still here.
Something is coming, something huge, and it's going to grind me to bits.
I will the pieces back together. I've blocked out the sound of battle but am acutely aware of tile scraping slowly across the floor.
The something that is making my heart pound in my chest and my blood turn to ice is still coming.
I hear a click as one of tiles slides back into place. With part of the link formed I pulsate with even more power. Inch by inch I go, reaching out energetically to form the link, the tiles following suit and sliding into place. The center is the last and hardest one. Unlike the others it's in pieces. My guts twist with effort as I imagine it whole, complete, perfect. The connection is made, though the center glows much more weakly than the others. I open my eyes. The battle is ending, the last of the demons being dispatched. I crawl to the center of the symbol, my body like jelly, and see the center stone, still cracked down the middle. Richard races to my side and I collapse into him, tears streaming down my face.
“I did this,” I whisper. “I did this.”
The vision faded and I was slammed back to the present, once again jarred to my core. I stayed completely still, but this time the world didn't shift around me.
“Oh, my God, Ember, what happened?” It was Kat's voice, though I knew it was an illusion.
But as my eyes adjusted, I saw not scorched earth below me, but grass. I twisted enough to see Kat, kneeling beside me, concern etched on her face.
“I-I was… How long was I gone?” I asked. Moving my mouth was agony.
“What do you mean, gone? You were storming off to find Annys and Master Dogan and then you just collapsed.”
“When?”
“Like ten seconds ago. You're really freaking me out. Do you want me to get the nurse?”
“No,” I said, sitting upright. My head swam but I fought against it. “I want you to tell me about a Keeper named Gretchen.”
Chapter 22
“Gretchen?” Kat said, confused. “Gretchen Hart? What do you want to know about her?”
“Hart?”
I trembled.
“Well, yeah. The only Gretchen I know is Taren's mom.”
As my world collapsed, Taren came racing toward us and skidded to a halt. “I saw you fall from across the lawn. Are you alright?”
He crouched at my side but I just stared at him, unable to form words.
“She asked how long she'd been gone and then asked about your mother,” Kat said when I didn't answer.
“You were… gone?” His brow creased with worry.
“Your mother,” I said, “she's a D—”
“Come on, let's get you to the nurse,” Taren said, trying to help me to my feet.
“I'm not going anywhere with you,” I said, pulling away from his touch.
“Ember, please,” Taren said, his eyes pleading, “let me take you to the nurse.”
I stood, wincing with the pain of my fall. “Fine, let's go.”
Kat made as if to follow, but Taren waved her off. “I've got it, Kat. Annys wants to speak with you anyway.”
“Do not do that to me again,” she said, stopping short when she saw me. “You almost gave me a heart attack.”
“Sorry,” I said. “I was hungry and it looked like you were going to sleep for awhile.”
“You move, I move,” she said, grabbing a mug from the cupboard. “That's how this is going to work until I get you safely back to the Institute.”
“Got it,” I said.
“How's your mom doing?” she asked.
“I'm not sure yet. If history is any indication, she'll probably spend most of the day in bed. After that… if she stays off of her meds, things will only get worse.”
I knew my tone was matter-of-fact, and it wasn't that I didn't care, I had just seen it all before. There were only so many times I could get my hopes up. Still, I was grateful for the good time we'd had the day before, and glad Kat had seen her that way, and not just the other.
It was after eleven and I was expected back at the Institute by one. When we’d finished breakfast, Kat and I worked on packing. She was concerned with clothing, I was more concerned with art supplies, books, and finding my iPod. Kat informed me that until I was second year I wouldn't be allowed to bring my cell phone and to be prepared to have my bags searched once I got back. First year students were considered too fragile to have unregulated contact with the outside world. By the time we'd filled my oversized duffle and a backpack, it was time to leave.
After we loaded my things into the car, I went back inside to say goodbye to my mother. I knew she wouldn't want to see Kat right now, and Kat seemed to understand.
I knocked, but when there was no answer, I entered my mother's room. She was snoring softly. She'd passed out, fully clothed on top of her comforter.
“Hey, Mom” I said, kneeling beside her bed, “it's time for me to get going.”
Her eyes fluttered open. “So soon? Can't you stay another day?” Her voice was husky with sleep.
“No, I'm sorry. But I'll come back soon.” I felt guilty making a promise I wasn't sure I could keep, but I wanted to avoid a scene.
She groped until she found my hand and squeezed it. “I can call them, the people at the Institute. I'll tell them I'll bring you back tomorrow. What's one day?”
I shook my head. “I've got to go, Mom. I love you.”
“Please don't leave me,” she said, her voice cracking. “If you leave you're not ever coming back. I need you, Em.”
She did. I knew she did. But I also knew the Institute needed me. And not for selfish reasons, but because together we needed to find a way to lock the Gateway again, lest the world be overrun by demons. The breaches would only get worse; when I connected to the Gate I had sensed how weak it was. It was only a matter of time before it failed completely. I couldn't let that happen, even if it meant breaking my mother's heart in order to save her life.
I pulled my hand away. “I'm going, Mom. I love you, but I'm going.”
I stood and walked to the door. Her sobs were quiet, each one pricking my heart. I imagined her face buried in the pillow, but I didn't turn back. I shut the door behind me.
***
By the time I got into the car I'd wiped my eyes of tears, but they felt puffy. I'm sure Kat could sense I wasn't up for conversation and we made the drive back to the Institute in relative silence.
Winding up Laurel Canyon I was focused on nothing but keeping out the voices and the motion sickness. For the most part it worked, and as we approached the front gate I felt proud of myself.
Three Guardians stepped in front of Kat's car as we approached the guard shack. All looked worse for the wear.
“Where have you been, Kat?” one of them asked when he recognized her. “We needed you last night.”
“What happened? Was there another breach?” Her tone was anxious.
“During the ritual. Why weren't you here?” the Guardian answered.
“What ritual? What are you talking about?” Kat sounded as confused as I felt.
“To re-seal the Gateway. The Elders called upon every Keeper, every Guardian, and every student to help. Word went out at dinner. Everyone was there except you and Taren. And her, I guess.” He pointed to me and a chill ran down my spine.
My mind raced with thoughts faster than I could pluck them out of the air. I'd spoken with Annys and Master Dogan around two, was it possible it hadn't been planned yet? If so, why wouldn't they have called us back?
“Who was hurt? Did we lose anyone?” Kat asked.
“With so many Guardians there, we didn't lose anyone, but dozens were injured. At least three-dozen more hostiles escaped and the Gate is in worse shape than ever. You really didn't know about this?”
“If I had known, don't you think I'd have been here, Adam?”
She slapped the steering wheel and cursed.
A conclusion was solidifying in my mind, making it impossible to think there was any explanation other than Annys and Master Dogan not wanting me present at this ritual. It made no sense. I was their best chance at repairing the Gateway; they themselves had told me as much. Why was I training so hard, otherwise? Why was I leaving my mother to cry alone if I was just going to be pushed aside? Anger welled up from deep within me and I clenched and unclenched my fists. I pulled on the door handle and strode out of the car.
“Ember, where are you going?” I heard Kat jump out the car, heard her footsteps behind me.
“I'm going to talk to some Elders,” I said, quickening my pace.
Perhaps we should talk first.
I'll deal with you later, I told the Voice, pushing it aside.
Wrong.
Chapter 21
I was falling, tumbling through endless darkness, being pulled by a force stronger than gravity. Just when I was sure I would fall forever I landed, face down, the impact reverberating through me. It took a moment before I could move. Was my back broken? I was sure my cheek had shattered. But when I was able to lift my head and probe it with my fingertips it seemed intact. I struggled to sit back on my heels.
I was in a dark wasteland, the only light an eerie glow that filtered through the blackest clouds I'd ever seen. Wind whipped at my hair and blew an acrid smoke into my nostrils that made me double over in a fit of coughing. It subsided only to be replaced by retching. What came up wasn't the cereal I'd eaten for breakfast but a tar-black slime that continued to coat my mouth no matter how much I spit. It tasted how I imagined a rotting corpse would smell. A scream ripped through the landscape followed by a crunch that sounded like bones and I turned, wild-eyed, searching for a place to hide.
BEAUTIFUL, ISN'T IT? YOU CAN SEE WHY I AM SO DESPERATE TO LEAVE.
The Voice crushed down upon my mind, allowing no other thought. I clutched at my temples, panting. Time passed differently in this dimension and I had no way of knowing how long I'd really been here. Was Kat already racing to find someone to do a Retrieval or had I not even collapsed to the ground yet in the human dimension?
IT ISN'T THE HUMAN'S DIMENSION. IT BELONGS TO THE DAEMONS. IT WAS STOLEN FROM US AND NOW IS THE TIME TO TAKE IT BACK.
I howled in pain and had to stop myself from beating my head against the cracked earth. I had to hold on. It couldn't be much longer, it couldn't—
YOU WILL NOT GO BACK UNTIL I RELEASE YOU. AND I WILL NOT RELEASE YOU UNTIL YOU HAVE SEEN.
My mouth hung open and my throat contracted, but no more sound came out. There was no voice left in me, none but It.
The landscape around me shifted and blurred and I thought I might be flying, until I realized that I remained on my hands and knees gripping the dirt. It was my surroundings that were moving.
Just as abruptly it stopped, and I found myself in the passenger seat of a car. I couldn't will myself to move; I was just an observer in this body, not the animating force. We pass a small market and I know we’re traveling through Laurel Canyon.
“I wish you would tell me what's bothering you,” a male voice says.
I turn to see a handsome man in his mid-forties with a salt and pepper beard. “It's nothing, honey, I'm fine.” The voice isn't mine, but I know it passes through the lips of the person whose body I'm inhabiting.
“It's not nothing, you toss and turn all night, lately. Are you having nightmares again?” The man's face is etched with concern.
“No,” I say, “it's just headaches. I made an appointment with Dr. Wilson to get checked out, but I'm sure there's nothing to worry about.” I reach across and rest my hand on his leg, giving it a squeeze. I look up to see the Institute coming into view. A Guardian steps out of the guard shack.
“Morning, Richard, Gretchen. Have a good shift,” he says and hits the code for the gate to open.
The world spun and for a moment I was back in the wasteland, back in my own body. But then—
I'm pacing back and forth in a dining room.
“You're being completely irrational. You're not making any sense,” Richard says. He's seated at the table, his expression pleading.
I stop pacing. “Stop calling me irrational! I know what I saw.” My voice booms.
Richard stands and grabs me by the shoulders. “Gretchen, listen to me, please. This isn't you talking. I can feel you slipping away. We have to get some help.”
Again my surroundings blurred, the motion making me queasy.
I'm in Master Dogan's office. All of the Elders, including Annys are gathered around his table. They're tense—eyes tight, posture stiff.
“It's not that we don't have sympathy for what you're going through,” says a female Elder with dark hair, grey streaking her temples, “we just have no one to replace you yet.”
“The centers are always the hardest to find, as you know,” says a plump man with thinning hair, “but we are trying.”
“Three more are due to graduate in the summer,” Annys says. “Surely you can wait until then to take a leave of absence.”
Master Dogan is studying me with his tranquil eyes.
“I have an idea to mitigate your exposure,” he says, “if you and Richard are willing.”
The world lurched.
I'm in a bathroom, fumbling with a bottle of Ibuprofen. I hear running bath water. My hands are shaking, my head pounds. At last, I unscrew the cap and pour four tablets into my palm then toss them back with a sip of water. I lean against the counter until I stop shaking. I pull off my robe and step into the steaming bath, so hot it's painful. I sink in slowly, getting acclimated. I soak long enough for the bath to have cooled. The throbbing in my head recedes, leaving a dull ache. Back in my robe, I exit the bathroom to see Richard reading in bed.
I slide under the covers next to him and lean against his chest. He's reading Hemingway.
“How are you feeling?” he asks.
“Better,” I say. “I haven't had a headache since we got here.”
The scene shifted and—
I'm entering what looks like a grand ballroom. The floor is tiled in a beautiful mosaic, the walls decorated with rich tapestries. The room is circular, with a wooden staircase leading to a balcony that rings the entirety. I'm holding Richard's hand and he gives me kiss before going to stand against the wall with other Guardians. I walk to the center of the room and look down. I'm standing on the center tile of the Gateway.
The time is now.
No, comes my mental response. Not now, not ever. Eight others surround me, dressed in the same white robe I wear. We all take our seats. I close my eyes and see a beautiful ball of golden light pulsating at my third eye. I'm reaching out, ready to form the link.
You know what I'll do to you.
It doesn't matter. I will never help you.
The first connection slides into place. A ribbon of energy pulsates between us. The second connection is made and I exhale.
It's only going to get worse.
Stop it! The thought is loud in my head and the connections break, sending shooting pain through my body. I open my eyes. There is shock on the faces of the other Keepers.
“I'm sorry,” I say. “Let's begin again.”
I form the links hastily, one after the next. There's nothing elegant about it, but my heart is racing, my palms sweating; I'm afraid to go slowly. The strength of the symbol buoys me. I'm relaxing, the tension leaves my shoulders, my breath deepens. I feel myself at the center, connecting all of us together.
You will help me.
The link wavers, but I struggle to hang on. I don't respond to the Voice. It requires all of my focus to keep the connection, now.
Are you surprised, Gretchen, that I can reach you even now? Do you think yourself safe when you link with these humans?
Perspiration beads on my forehead. My teeth grind with effort.
Do you think there is anywhere you can go that I cannot find you?
The connection slips a fraction but I regain it. I'm swaying now.
It's no use fighting it. You will help me destroy the Gateway and release—
NO! The thought consumes my mind, blocking out all other sensations. I WILL NEVER HELP YOU. NOT. EVER!!!
I push back against the Demon with everything I have. Too late I realize what I've done. The link is severed; the eight lights pulsating around me wink out. My eyes fly open to see the other Keepers knocked backward. The Guardians at the wall rush forward, but the earth shakes violently below us. They struggle to keep their footing. Looking down I notice the tiniest of cracks appear.
“No!” I scream as it spreads, spidering in different directions.
The other Keepers haven't stirred other than being shaken by the force that feels like an earthquake but isn't. The center tile is splitting beneath me. I feel my insides threatening to erupt. I cry out in agony as the pain overwhelms me, paralyzes me. It's Richard who grabs my arm and hauls me out of the way as a gaping hole opens where I'd been just seconds before.
The other Guardians reach the Keepers and drag them back from the ever-widening maw.
“Run, Gretchen!” Richard is standing, sword drawn, balancing on the shifting floor.
The rumbling slows, and from the hole comes a mass of demons, clawing their way to freedom. The Guardians hack and slash at the monsters. An alarm sounds, barely audible over the clash of battle. The demons are coming in torrents, raining down upon the Guardians. We're outnumbered, but the demons seem more interested in fleeing than fighting. They stream toward the doors only to be met by the now rallied forces. The Guardians make easy meat of them, but they keep coming.
I squeeze my eyes shut. I imagine the symbol, glowing bright. Not just the center this time, but the whole Gateway. The ribbon of energy pulsates throughout my body. I am the Gateway—pieces fragmented, but still here.
Something is coming, something huge, and it's going to grind me to bits.
I will the pieces back together. I've blocked out the sound of battle but am acutely aware of tile scraping slowly across the floor.
The something that is making my heart pound in my chest and my blood turn to ice is still coming.
I hear a click as one of tiles slides back into place. With part of the link formed I pulsate with even more power. Inch by inch I go, reaching out energetically to form the link, the tiles following suit and sliding into place. The center is the last and hardest one. Unlike the others it's in pieces. My guts twist with effort as I imagine it whole, complete, perfect. The connection is made, though the center glows much more weakly than the others. I open my eyes. The battle is ending, the last of the demons being dispatched. I crawl to the center of the symbol, my body like jelly, and see the center stone, still cracked down the middle. Richard races to my side and I collapse into him, tears streaming down my face.
“I did this,” I whisper. “I did this.”
The vision faded and I was slammed back to the present, once again jarred to my core. I stayed completely still, but this time the world didn't shift around me.
“Oh, my God, Ember, what happened?” It was Kat's voice, though I knew it was an illusion.
But as my eyes adjusted, I saw not scorched earth below me, but grass. I twisted enough to see Kat, kneeling beside me, concern etched on her face.
“I-I was… How long was I gone?” I asked. Moving my mouth was agony.
“What do you mean, gone? You were storming off to find Annys and Master Dogan and then you just collapsed.”
“When?”
“Like ten seconds ago. You're really freaking me out. Do you want me to get the nurse?”
“No,” I said, sitting upright. My head swam but I fought against it. “I want you to tell me about a Keeper named Gretchen.”
Chapter 22
“Gretchen?” Kat said, confused. “Gretchen Hart? What do you want to know about her?”
“Hart?”
I trembled.
“Well, yeah. The only Gretchen I know is Taren's mom.”
As my world collapsed, Taren came racing toward us and skidded to a halt. “I saw you fall from across the lawn. Are you alright?”
He crouched at my side but I just stared at him, unable to form words.
“She asked how long she'd been gone and then asked about your mother,” Kat said when I didn't answer.
“You were… gone?” His brow creased with worry.
“Your mother,” I said, “she's a D—”
“Come on, let's get you to the nurse,” Taren said, trying to help me to my feet.
“I'm not going anywhere with you,” I said, pulling away from his touch.
“Ember, please,” Taren said, his eyes pleading, “let me take you to the nurse.”
I stood, wincing with the pain of my fall. “Fine, let's go.”
Kat made as if to follow, but Taren waved her off. “I've got it, Kat. Annys wants to speak with you anyway.”
