Sir Callie and the Dragon's Roost, page 11
But that doesn’t feel right. That doesn’t make sense in the puzzle of my head.
If Teo was tricking us to help xem escape, that was a big gamble. Xe never asked us to help. That was my and Willow’s idea, all by ourselves. Xe told us not to risk it but we did anyway. Teo could’ve gotten away on xir own once we were out of the dungeons.
But xe didn’t.
Teo stayed with us and ran with us.
And saved us.
If there is a lie there, I can’t find it.
I let all the burned air out of my lungs and close my eyes.
* * *
In my dreams, I hear the dragon’s song, but this time it’s not calling for me.
Private, desperate. Keening. And I feel like I’m eavesdropping on a conversation not meant for my ears.
There are no words, just a whistle that sounds like none I’ve ever heard before. Not a person or a bird. Not even the wind. It’s high and low all at once; a trilling bird and a moaning tree. It seeps through my skin and into my bones and resonates there until I’m trembling.
I am in the middle of the moors on an open plain, surrounded by sky and long grass that bends and bows to the tuneless song; the clouds rushing away like they’re being chased. There is no wind.
I crane my neck, searching for their hunter.
I see nothing but the shadows of dragons.
They swarm and swim, slashing the clouds with bladelike wings and snapping them with glinting teeth. Their eyes burn bright in the darkness of their looping silhouettes.
And then one of them pauses in the air and turns to stare at me, great wings flapping slowly.
This dragon isn’t a shadow.
Its scales glint red. Blood and fire and burning bridges.
A smile stretches across Kensa’s face.
So, little knight, you did it. I knew you would.
You don’t know anything, I want to yell. I try to. I open my mouth, but my tongue has forgotten how to make letters. All that comes out is a smoke-scorched rasp from the bottom of my throat.
Don’t worry, says Kensa. You will find your voice again. Be patient. Give it time. Then the dragon twists in the air, fluid as a snake. Be seeing you, little knight. Very, very soon.
* * *
When I wake up, I splash into the stream and I drink and drink and drink until my belly is full. Then I lie in the water, clothes and all, and let the sweet, fresh water soak into my skin.
It’s the best bath I’ve ever had.
I push my fingers through my hair, carefully combing out as many of the knots as I can, then I rip out a handful of spongy moss and scrub until I remember what clean feels like.
It’s cold in the early dawn, but I don’t care. It feels good to shiver after a night on fire.
I sit on a rock and rebraid my hair, looking back at our makeshift camp. No one stirs. I’m glad. I hope they sleep long and hard.
Mostly because I don’t want to even think about what we’re supposed to do next.
I let my feet wander and they carry me to the edge of the cliff.
The water is peaceful, shallow waves lapping lazily over the sand like all is well with the world. Like there isn’t still smoke in the air. I wonder if I’ll ever get the smell out of my nose.
“Hey.” Edwyn eases himself down beside me, long legs dangling over the edge. His hair is slicked back and dripping, the blood and soot scrubbed from his skin. If anything, he looks worse now that the bruises and shadows are uncovered. There’s a cut in his lip that’s still oozing. “You should be sleeping. We’ve a long day ahead.”
“Says you.”
He laughs softly. “I’ve never been much of a sleeper. It takes a long time to fall asleep, and I always wake up early. And it still never feels like there are enough hours in the day.”
“There are for people who don’t try to fit a week’s worth of stuff into one day.”
I mean it as a joke, but Edwyn doesn’t laugh. “I suppose that’s accurate.”
“How’re you doing?”
Edwyn hunches down. “I’m okay. This may or may not shock you, but I’ve had worse days. And few that have ended so triumphantly.” He catches my eye and hesitates. “I…wanted to thank you. I know how much you have left behind on our behalf. I underestimated you.”
I can’t unknot my frown. “Huh?”
“There’s an order to things,” says Edwyn jaggedly. “All things. And I…I—I’ve never been at the top of anyone’s list.” He flushes heavily. “You put me and Elowen first. Above those you love more. Above your fathers and the dream you fought for. You gave all of that up. For us.”
I scrunch my face with literally no idea how on earth I’m supposed to respond to this. Even thank-yous are excruciating. “No big deal.”
“Yes big deal,” Edwyn insists. “Very big deal. I know what you left behind.”
My shrug goes up to my ears. I don’t want to think about what I left behind. “Anyone else would’ve done the same,” I mumble.
“I know you know that’s not true, Callie.”
I suck my lip between my teeth and bite. Hard. Yeah, I do know. And that’s the worst part of all of it. It was so simple to me and Willow. Straightforward. Black-and-white. There was no need for the grown-ups to treat it like it was some complicated, fragile thing.
“It wasn’t a choice,” I tell him bluntly. “And you don’t need to thank me. It’s not like we…stopped him from—”
“Regardless. Thank you. And thank you for not giving up on me when I was…not at my best. I know it would’ve been easier to leave me behind.”
“El didn’t mean it. She would never really go without you.”
“Elowen is, rightly, sick of making sacrifices on my behalf. She stayed in our parents’ apartment when she could’ve left to live in the Queen’s Quarters. She would’ve been happier. She would’ve been safer. She stayed for me.”
“A choice isn’t the same as a sacrifice,” I say, nudging his shoulder with mine. “And you need to stop being so shocked that folks are willing to fight for you. You deserve it, no less than everyone else.”
He still doesn’t believe it, I realize when he turns his face away. To him, they’re just words; the kind of hollow placation people tell you when they want you to shut up.
We sit together on the edge of the cliff, looking out to the endless horizon, as the sun rises to warm us. It’s a long while before Edwyn speaks again.
“What happens next? Where do we go?”
“I dunno,” I admit. “Didn’t really think that far, to be honest. The odds were low that we’d even get out. Anywhere you want to go?”
Edwyn shakes his head. “I never gave much thought to the world on the other side of the bridge. I knew I’d cross it once I became a knight, but I’d go where they told me and I would always go back. Father said everything on the other side of the bridge was dangerous. Cursed. Lawless.”
“Has your father ever been right about anything?”
Edwyn gives a soft laugh. “Just because you don’t like him, doesn’t mean he wasn’t right about a lot of things.”
My eyes narrow. “Like what?”
Edwyn tenses, all wide-eyed like he’s been caught doing something he shouldn’t, and his fingers start fidgeting. “It doesn’t matter.”
“Of course it matters!” I take a deep breath, doing my best to keep my irritation out of my voice. “Look, two wrongs don’t make a right. Just because your dad and Adan—”
“And the whole court.”
I grimace. “Okay, a hundred wrongs don’t make a right. It wouldn’t matter if the whole entire world agreed with Peran, he was wrong. Period.”
The fiddling gets faster. “Okay.”
I want to yell in frustration and shake Edwyn until he gets it. But somehow I don’t think that’ll help much. I wish there was a place we could go that would prove to Edwyn that the whole world isn’t as cruel or bitter as Peran painted it…
I perk up so suddenly, Edwyn startles.
“What?”
“Eyrewood!”
He blinks. “I…don’t know what that is.”
“It’s home! Or, at least, it was before Papa and me went to Helston. It’s the best!” The more I think about it, the more perfect the plan is! It was Eyrewood that pieced me back together and helped me work myself out and let me be messy and make mistakes and loved me the whole time. That’s what Edwyn needs. That’s what we all need. “It’s not so far,” I tell him enthusiastically. “Well, actually it’s pretty far, especially if we’re walking, but it’s absolutely worth it! And they’ll love you!”
Edwyn winces slightly. “They?”
I launch into an enthusiastic description of the family we left behind—Faolan and Rowena, Josh and his awful cooking, and Pasco the pirate, and the home they cobbled together in Eyrewood Forest out of nothing, where everyone is welcome. Unconditionally.
“Nothing is unconditional,” says Edwyn bitterly, and I deflate.
“I know it seems like that, but—”
“Everything comes with conditions, Callie. That isn’t a criticism, just a fact. And I’m not going to be foolish enough to let you convince me otherwise again. I—I don’t mean that badly,” he adds quickly, catching the look on my face. “I understand why you wanted me to believe it the way you believe it. And I understand how you’re able to. But we’re not the same, and it was my own fault for forgetting that.”
I don’t tell Edwyn he’s wrong. I don’t argue that the twisted world Peran and Adan created for him is the false one. I don’t promise better on the other side of this adventure.
I just hope, with everything I am, that I can prove him wrong.
“I’m glad you’re here with us.”
“Me too. Thank you for not leaving me behind.”
“Nothing to say thank you for. We’re family. Family sticks together.” I elbow him lightly until I pull a smile from his lips. “Unconditionally.”
CHAPTER TWELVE
Willow and Elowen are up and stoking a small fire by the time Edwyn and I head back.
“Teo’s gone to catch breakfast,” says Willow before I can ask. And, “Callie, there’s something you need to know—”
“Xe’s a dragon. Yeah, I worked it out last night.”
Edwyn says, “Dragon?”
Just as Willow says, “Xe’s?”
“Yes, dragon. And Teo told me yesterday xir words are ‘xe/xem.’ ”
I swear, every time Willow goes starry-eyed, they get brighter. “That’s pretty!”
But Edwyn has gone a sickly gray color. “Dragon…Xey’re a…a dragon.”
“Xey’re not bad,” says Willow. “Xe’s on our side—”
“But a dragon! Dragons are—”
“What we are not doing,” says Elowen with a sharp glance at her brother, “is making rash assumptions.”
“Elowen.”
“Edwyn.”
The twins glare at each other, and I’ve never agreed with two differing opinions so heartily.
Dragons are the known enemy of humankind—the villain of all the best ballads, and the worst insult folks sling around. The greatest accomplishment a knight can achieve is slaying a dragon. Everyone knows this. And it’s not like our previous experience did anything to change that opinion. Fangs and fire and flame…But El’s right too. Teo is different. Or seems to be different.
Dragons lie, Papa’s voice echoes in my head. Trust your gut.
But I don’t know what my gut thinks.
My gut is hungry.
“Dragons are the enemy,” Edwyn insists. “Don’t you remember the last time we encountered one? How do we know Teo isn’t trying to lure us into its nest?”
“Do dragons even live in nests?” Willow muses.
“Not the point,” says Edwyn. “We have a plan and it doesn’t include partnering with a dragon.”
“It’s not really a plan,” I amend when Elowen and Willow raise questioning eyebrows. “More of a direction. I figured we could head north, toward Eyrewood. I know we’ll be more than welcome there, and it’s far enough away from Helston that it’ll at least feel safe.”
Elowen hugs her middle. “There isn’t anywhere far away enough from Helston to feel safe.”
Willow pokes at the fire. “I wonder what they’re doing right now. It’s late enough they’ll be awake—”
“I’m pretty sure burning down the bridge was enough to wake anyone up last night,” I say. “I wonder if they’ve found Adan. I wonder what they told Papa and the queen.”
Willow winces. “I’m sure they’re worried.”
“I’m sure they’re furious,” says El. “Wherever we decide, we should start moving as soon as we can. I don’t believe for one moment that a broken bridge will be enough to stall Helston for long.”
I sit forward. “Seriously? I thought the bridge was the only way in or out of Helston.”
“It’s the only easy way,” Willow says, almost apologetically. “It could never be the only way, precisely for reasons such as these. There weren’t always protective wards up. It isn’t impenetrable. Not truly. There always needed to be an escape.”
My head aches. “So they could be after us. They could be tracking right now. We need to go!”
“No one has used the boats in years,” says Willow. “Decades. If they’re even serviceable, it’s going to take a while. We have time to breathe.”
That’s not what the panic in my chest says.
“And if they catch us, we are not helpless.” Elowen’s voice is quiet but sharp, edged with anger. “We fought and we won unarmed. I am not afraid to face them again. In fact, let them try.” She raises her face with a flash of something fierce and a curling smile that makes me uneasy. “Let them come close enough that I may take revenge.”
“Revenge?” Willow echoes. “Against Helston?”
“Don’t you want it too? After everything they’ve done to us?”
Willow catches my eye.
“I think we got a pretty healthy dose of revenge last night, El.”
But she shakes her head hard. “Not enough. Not nearly enough.”
* * *
Luckily we have to put all revenge talk aside in favor of breakfast when Teo returns, triumphant, with a whole armful of limp rabbits, which xe promptly starts to skin with one deadly-sharp claw.
“And I was certain we were going to starve,” I muse, unsheathing Satin in an attempt to help out.
“The moors provide,” says Teo, finishing xir second in less time than it takes me to get halfway through one. “So long as you know where to look.” Xe grins, showing off glinting fangs. “Lucky you’ve got me to help, huh?”
Can’t exactly argue with that, dragon or not.
Willow takes charge of the cooking like he’s a seasoned camper and not the future king who, until a few hours ago, lived his whole life in a royal palace. He skewers the rabbits on sticks Edwyn sharpens with Satin while I take the time to study Teo properly.
It’s so obvious what xe is now, I can’t imagine not seeing dragon in xem.
“Did they know?” I ask. “Adan and his lot. That you’re a dragon.”
Teo shakes xir head. “No way. I would definitely be dead if they did. The first thing any dragon learns is how to hide what they are.” Teo reaches to touch one of the pale horns sprouting from xir head like xe’s confirming they’re still there. “It feels good to be me again.” Then Teo pauses, pointed ears twitching down, and xir eyes dart anxiously between us. “It’s not a…You’re not gonna…We’re allies, aren’t we? Friends?”
Xe’s scared, I realize in shock. Not just scared—terrified.
A dragon is scared of us.
“Of course we are,” says Willow quickly when my silence stretches a little too thin. “We’re indebted to you.”
Teo screws up xir face. “You’re the ones who saved me.”
“We saved each other,” says Elowen. “I don’t think it can get much more equal than that.”
“At least let me repay you in some way,” Teo insists. “I don’t know what your strategy is, but there’s a haven for you as long as you want it. If you want it.”
I frown. “A haven?”
The dragon nods eagerly. “A sanctuary. A safe place for all those who wander the moors in search of a home. Everyone is welcome.”
Edwyn’s eyes narrow. “And the conditions are?”
Xir head cocks. “Conditions?”
“Nothing is free,” says Edwyn with a bite of impatience. “And we don’t have anything to give.”
“No conditions,” says Teo, shaking xir head emphatically. “I swear.”
Dragons lie.
“How do we know to trust you?” I ask. “How do we know you’re not just leading us into some kind of trap?”
Hurt floods Theo’s face, and I fight against the guilt. But it’s a fair question, isn’t it? We might’ve been through a nightmare and back, but that doesn’t mean we know each other. And when it comes all the way down to it, knights and dragons are natural enemies. There’s no point pretending otherwise.
“I know it’s risky,” says Willow softly. “And it seems illogical to willingly go into the heart of enemy territory, but El’s right—whose enemy? We don’t know anything about anything. Friends are enemies and enemies are friends, and I say we give xem a chance. Besides”—he twists the hem of his tunic—“maybe it would be useful to make contact with Dumoor. Positive contact. Maybe if we help Teo get home, it might go some way to repairing the relationship between Helston and Dumoor.”
Something inside me sparks and explodes. “You wanna go on a diplomatic mission? Are you kidding me?”
Willow flushes. “We’re not on anyone’s side anymore, but maybe we can use that to stop this war before it begins. If we can show Dumoor that Helston isn’t that bad, maybe they’ll make amends with Helston. And Helston will see that magic isn’t the problem and their fears are unfounded and—”
