Next-Door Incubus, page 8
part #1 of Becoming Lust Series
He chuckled. “I think we’re past the point of looking stupid in front of each other, don’t you think?”
My cheeks flushed even more. I looked down at my glass, then back at him. “It’s—uh…” I shook my head. Fuck it. “You were in my dream last night.”
His lips curled into a smirk. “And?”
“And…” I smiled, looking back down. “You were wearing those horns I wore at the Halloween party.” I gazed back at the top of his head, gnawing on the inside of my lip. The dream was torturing me. Visions, sensations, feelings of last night replayed over and over in my mind. Not letting me think straight once today. It wasn’t even real and here I was frustrated just by the thought of it. “I just thought you looked really, really good in them.”
He raised a sharp brow. “You liked them?”
“Yes.”
“You’ve been thinking about me with horns?”
“Yes. And…” My head swayed slightly.
“And?”
“Your eyes.” I brushed my fingers against his cheekbone, heart pounding in my chest. “They were so black.”
He smirked. “What’d you think of that?”
I thought a lot about it, but all of those thoughts would get me sent straight to Hell. So, instead of telling him what I really thought, I giggled softly to myself. “They were… nice.”
“Nice?”
“Yes. Very, very nice,” I said. I closed my eyes, listening to him chuckle, and smiled. “Crazy dream, huh?”
He sipped the rest of his drink and gazed at the table, looking like he was contemplating something. After a few moments, he gazed back at me. “No, not really.”
“What do you mean?” I asked, my head feeling light.
His fingertips paled around the glass. “It’s not something that we should discuss right now.”
“When?”
“I don’t know...” He sighed. “Why don’t you go find Trevon?”
“But—”
“Dani, please.” His voice was quiet. “When I tell you—really tell you—there isn’t any going back. I’d prefer us to stay like this for now.”
Chapter 16
After downing the rest of my shot—because I needed all the liquid courage I could get—I staggered down the hallway, fingers gliding against the wall to guide me toward Trevon’s office. I still didn’t know what I was going to say to him. Hell, maybe he wouldn’t even want to talk to me since I reeked of alcohol and was a tiny bit tipsy.
By the time I made it to his office, I was rubbing Mom’s pendant between my sweaty palms and breathing heavy. Scenario after scenario was playing out in my head of how this could all go. Some were bad: Trevon yells at me for being immature by drinking before we talk. Most were really, really bad: I tell him I was going to give him another chance and spend the rest of my life feeling like shit.
So much for drinking to calm my nerves. That plan went right out the window.
I took a deep breath and knocked against the cold door. No answer. I knocked again. Nothing.
I jingled the doorknob and walked into an empty office. I had done it a million times before but barging into Trevon’s office never felt so wrong.
His black peacoat was draped over the arm of the couch and his baseball cap was sitting on his desk. I shut the door behind me and wandered over to sit in his big comfy chair. He was probably in the bathroom.
My head still felt light, and I swayed in the chair, knees bouncing.
A manila folder was sitting on top of a bunch of legal documents on the desk. Termination of Employee: Samantha Bernard. My eyes widened, and I picked up the folder.
Trevon fired Samantha? Why would he do that? I mean, sure, she was a bit rude to me. Okay… she was very rude to me. But he wouldn’t fire her because of that, would he?
I played with the edge of the folder, debating on finding out why. I didn’t want him to yell at me again—this time for being too nosy—but I couldn’t help it. He was acting suspicious.
Just as I was about to open the file, the doorknob rattled. I quickly placed it back down and stood. If he caught me snooping, he would think I didn’t trust him. And he definitely wouldn’t trust me.
Someone banged on the door, and then it was pushed open. Trevon stumbled in backwards, a pair of hands squeezing his ass.
What the fuck?
Javier pushed him into the room, lips pressed against Trevon’s. Trevon was fumbling with his belt, groping Javier through his pants, grinding himself against him like Javier was the only damn thing that he ever wanted. And he was so desperately craving him right now.
My eyes widened.
Holy Hell.
What was he doing? Was this really happening?
I blinked a few times. Maybe I was just seeing things. Maybe I was drunker than I thought. I should’ve just had one, not three.
Javier pushed Trevon’s hand into his jeans, and Trevon groaned softly against his lips. “Fuck,” he said under his breath. “I’ve been waiting for this all day.”
Oh, God. This was actually happening.
“What the hell are you doing?” I shouted.
Trevon jumped back and pushed Javier away. He wiped his lips with the back of his hand. “Dani…” he said breathlessly. His eyes were a hazy and intoxicated brown like I had never seen before. I parted my lips, gazing wildly between the two. I didn’t even know what else to say. “Dani, I-I can explain! It’s not what it looks like!” He pulled up his pants and buckled his belt.
“Really, Trevon? How is seeing you kiss Javier supposed to look?” I dug my nails into my palms. I couldn’t believe this. How could he do this to me? And with Javier?
A wall of heat crashed into me, followed by the strong scent of licorice. Javier stepped toward me, eyes low and viciously dark. Trying to intimidate me. I glared at him—not backing down. All I felt was pure rage for the man who was ruining my life.
My life and Maria’s life. I thought he had a thing with her, but I guess I was wrong. He seemed to fuck anything and anyone he could get his goddamn hands on.
Trevon rushed over to me, gently placing his hands on my shoulders. “Dani, I… I—we… we weren’t—” So much regret in his eyes. It was all a damn put-on.
“How long has this been going on?” I asked. Trevon just stood there, brows furrowed together, not even attempting to speak a single word. “I can’t believe you.” I pulled myself out of his grip. “Damn it, Trevon. Did you ever even care?”
He parted his lips, but I cut him off. I didn’t want to listen to another one of his lies. I didn’t want to be played again.
“You know what—I can’t take this anymore. We’re done! Done!” I stormed out of the office, not sparing Javier another look, and slammed the door behind me.
Don’t cry, Dani. Don’t do it.
I hurried down the hallway and through the bar. My heart raced. An angry tear rolled down my cheek. Fuck Trevon. Another tear. I hated him. I hated him so much.
All those memories—lying in bed late at night, fingers brushing softly against my chin, holding me against his chest and letting me listen to his steady heartbeat. Every early morning, I spent with him as he desperately tried to get his bar up and running. Every late night I waited at home for him with his favorite kettle corn and cheesy Hallmark movie.
So fucking stupid.
How many people has he cheated on me with? How many times? How long has this been going on? And… I drew my brows together, teary gaze fixed on the ground… why?
I had done everything for him, tried to be the perfect girlfriend, tried to give him everything he wanted, sacrificed my happiness for his. And all I got was a front-row seat to Trevon’s raunchy escapades.
God, I wanted to march right back into his office and make sure he knew how badly he hurt me. I wanted an explanation. I wanted an apology for wasting five years of my life on him. But something in my gut told me to keep walking and to never turn back. Not even when he knocked on my door with teary eyes and a sappy apology.
And I wasn’t going to.
He didn’t make me happy anymore. I knew that now.
Chapter 17
“What a dick. Honestly, who the heaven does he think he is? Did he really think he could just do that to you?!” Kasey paced back and forth in her apartment with her arms crossed and a sinister look in her eye.
I curled into the side of her plush white sofa and clutched a pillow to my chest. When I walked out of the bar three hours ago, I didn’t feel this bad. But when I made it to Kasey’s, it hit me. Hard.
Trevon would never visit me after work with a bottle of white wine and a pepperoni pizza again. He would never hold me when I woke up at night from a nightmare about Mom’s death again. He would never love me—really, truly love me—again. At least, I wouldn’t let him—I couldn’t, because maybe he never had.
There was no way in hell that I’d go back to him now, no way that I’d forgive him for this. I dug my fingers into the pillow. I wanted to rip it apart. I wanted to scream and cry—both at the same time.
Five years. I wasted five years of my life on him. Five years of laughing at his stupid jokes and smiling at his stupid faces and loving his stupid ass.
If he wanted to see other people, he should’ve just broken up with me. It would’ve saved us both a bit of hardship.
“You know what? Screw him. I didn’t like him, anyway.” Kasey pursed her red lips. “He’s a no-good cheater. He’s going to Hell. I’ll make sure he has the worst time down there.”
I loosened my grip on the pillows and laughed lifelessly. I guess I’d see him there. With all the lying and denying my lustful thoughts and dreams of Eros, I wouldn’t make it to Heaven, that’s for sure.
Someone knocked on the door, and my heart leapt. A part of me wanted Trevon to be standing there, clothes soaked from the rain, a sorrowful expression on his face. Not that I would accept any apology from him. I just wanted to see that he cared, even if it was just a little.
Kasey stormed to the door and yanked it open. A female dressed in a soft pink dress stood in the doorway—the waitress from Ollie’s diner that Kasey had flirted with when we were out. Her natural curls were parted down the middle and a cute maroon bow was clipped in her hair. “Hey Baby,” she said, holding out a bottle of wine.
“Mycah,” Kasey whispered, immediately relaxing. She took a deep breath and leaned closer to her. “Now’s not really a good time.”
Mycah gazed over her shoulder at me and frowned.
I stood and dropped the pillow. “I was just leaving. It’s okay.” It was late anyway.
“No,” Kasey said. “You’re staying the night.”
After shrugging off her coat, Mycah placed the bottle of wine on the counter. “Man trouble?”
“Boy trouble,” Kasey said. “That bastard cheated on her.”
Mycah poured three glasses of wine. “That guy you used to always come into Ollie’s with?”
“Yes,” I said.
She handed me a glass of wine. “Well, here’s a little something to rid him from your mind.” Then, she sat on the couch next to me and gently rubbed my knee. “Who needs cheaters anyway?” Kasey lightly grabbed her chin and placed a kiss on her cheek.
For the next few hours, we talked about anything and everything other than Trevon. From Ollie’s to Dr. U to my sexy neighbor that wouldn’t leave me alone. And when Kasey brought him up, Mycah stood and raised her eyebrows at me. “Do I hear a rebound?” she asked.
My cheeks tingled, and I gazed out at the city through her floor-length windows. “No.”
Kasey pursed her red lips. “We’ll see about that.”
Mycah placed her hand on Kasey’s knee and kissed her. “Well, I’m going to bed. I look forward to hearing more about this mystery man.”
Kasey watched her disappear down the hallway and grabbed our empty wine glasses.
“So, are you two a thing?” I asked, following her to the kitchen.
“Yeah.” She smiled.
“How long?”
Her eyes widened with excitement, and she leaned against the counter. “A few weeks. I’ll have to tell you more about her in the morning. If I tell you now, you won’t be able to shut me up and I don’t want to keep her waiting.” She brought me to a spare bedroom and pulled out a few blankets. “Are you alright?”
I smiled weakly. “I will be.” Hopefully.
When I laid down and shut my eyes and was finally alone with my thoughts for the first time tonight, I clenched the blankets in my fists. I wasn’t alright. My heart hurt. I felt like I was suffocating. The tears wouldn’t stop rolling down my cheeks.
Did I drive him to cheat on me? Did I not go out with him as much as he wanted me to? Was I not fun and spontaneous anymore? Was it because I said that I needed time to think?
I wiped the tears. No. This wasn’t my fault. I refused to blame myself for this. Cheating on me was his choice, and it was a bad one.
~~~
I was lying in a bed and staring up at a plain white ceiling. Gusts of wind blew in through a cracked window. All I wanted was to pull the blankets over my body, but everything felt too heavy to move. My head and my heart.
“Dani, it’s not your fault,” someone whispered.
Eros laid next to me, fingers grazing against my cheek. I turned onto my side, tucking my hand under my pillow, and gazed into his black eyes. He was wearing those horns again.
I waited for him to say something to take my mind off of this, but he just wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his chest. I inhaled his cinnamon aroma and relaxed in his arms. They were so warm.
We laid like that for hours. My fingers digging into his bare back, me holding him closer than I ever held Trevon, clutching him like he was the only thing I had ever wanted. I didn’t know how much I needed this.
“I’m going to make this right for you,” he said.
~~~
When I woke up the next morning, I swore I could smell Eros on the bed sheets. It felt as if he had been there with me the whole night, but that was an even stupider thought than the idea of me giving Trevon a second chance.
After Kasey dropped me off at home, I stood in the elevator with my phone pressed to my ear. “I’m so sorry again, Dr. U., but I… I won’t be able to come in today.”
“Is everything okay, Dani? You never call off,” she said, worry clear in her voice.
“Yes.” It was. At least, I was feeling a bit better than yesterday.
She paused for a long moment. “Dani, it’s not good to deny your feelings. Don’t let them build up. Remember how that unfolded in the past for you.”
“I know,” I said softly, stepping out of the elevator. Denying Mom’s murder made me so hateful of everything. Now I had to deal with Trevon and his cheating.
“Take as much time as you need,” she said. “And promise me you’ll talk to someone about this, even if it’s not me.”
“I promise.”
I hung up the phone and walked down the hall. Trevon was the only good in my life after I lost Mom and now he was gone too—willingly. What did I have left? Who did I have left to talk to about this? Kasey. Maria, maybe.
Everything was eerily quiet as I pushed my key into my apartment door, lost in my thoughts. Then, suddenly, I heard yelling from next door. I was going to ignore it until I heard Javier’s voice.
“I can’t fucking believe you!” Eros said.
“Come on. You know how I live, Eros,” Javier said. I gripped the doorknob, fingers turning white.
“I told you to stay away from her!”
“You told me not to fuck her, and I didn’t.” Javier’s voice was laced with annoyance.
“So, you fuck her boyfriend instead?” Eros paused. “I can’t believe that I actually fell for this shit. I should’ve known. You’re just like your father.”
Javier chuckled lowly. I could only imagine he had the same sinister look on his face that he gave me when I caught him with Trevon. “You should be used to it by now.”
“This is why I left.”
“Who are you kidding, Eros? You were banished! You didn’t leave. Mother didn’t want a son like you. She never did.”
Silence…or was that whispering? My ears tingled, and I sucked in a breath.
“Why didn’t you tell me that she’s—” Javier started, but I heard sudden footsteps and saw the door swing open, so I slipped into my apartment and shut the door behind me. That didn’t sound good.
I inhaled deeply, breathing in the scent of eggs and bacon, and closed my eyes. Eros and Javier were half-brothers? Where did their mother banish him from—and, on second thought, who even used that word anymore? Why did Eros warn Javier to stay away from me?
The last question interested me more than the others. Maybe I was hoping that it was because he possibly liked me too. After last night’s dream, I was starting to think anything was possible.
He probably told Javier that so he could be the one to fuck me. He had made it clear from the moment that he met me that that was what he wanted.
The bacon on the skillet was sizzling in a heap of grease. Maria hurried out of the hallway, running a hand through her hair, phone pressed to her ear. “I don’t know where she is. She didn’t come home last night, and I’m so worried about her, Zane. And this breakfast is burning and—” She looked at me with wide teary eyes and clicked off the phone without saying goodbye. She rushed over to me and pulled me into a hug. “Dani! Where have you been?”
“At a friend’s place,” I said, awkwardly patting her on the back.
She wiped a tear from her cheek, trying not to mess up her mascara. “I was so worried about you. I heard what happened. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.”
“You are?”
“Yes,” I said. “I think so.”
Honestly, I was still hurting, but I felt so much better. Last night, my world felt like it was shattering. I didn’t think I’d ever spend another day without disgusting wet tears rolling down my cheeks and puffy red eyes.
“Are you okay?” I asked. “You and Javier—”
