Everyday Enlightenment, page 12
• Would you describe your mind as busy or calm?
• Do you believe you have a clear grasp on reality?
• What do you do when you have troubling thoughts, such as worries, concerns, guilt, or anxieties?
• Do you believe your life would be better if you had better control over your mind?
• Have you tried to quiet your mind? What happened then?
• Do you try to think positively? Have you successfully done so with any consistency?
• Should people be held responsible for petty, jealous, negative, or sadistic thoughts or ideas?
• Would you like to live a more simple life? What might this have to do with your mind?
Anatomy of the Mind
First a word on thoughts, since I use this term often. Thoughts are those subjective pictures, sounds, and words—and the beliefs, associations, interpretations, opinions, and meanings—that pass through our mind or hold our attention. The mind is an ocean of awareness through which thoughts pass, sometimes like flotsam and jetsam, sometimes like sailboats or speedboats.
We can deliberately think thoughts, as when we rehearse a speech, remember a shopping list, or solve a puzzle or math problem. Clearly, such deliberate thinking is a profound and useful capacity of the human mind—a boon, not a problem.
The thoughts we need to transcend, the mind we need to tame, are those random, problematic gremlins that interfere with clear thinking, with the silence of clear perception, and especially with our relationship to ourselves, to others, and to everyday life. This is the discursive mind, the wild monkey-mind that must be tamed.
Even as you read this, ongoing research into the human brain is expanding the frontiers of scientific knowledge. Yet few of us have insight into the anatomy of our own mind—its structure and function. So to begin that process of insight, I present here a speculative model about the right and left hemispheres of the brain (which I'll refer to as the right brain and left brain). Although both sides of the brain interact to form a whole, each side has general functions and responsibilities different from the other.
Your left brain functions in a more linear, logical, rational, structured, mathematical (conceptually based) fashion; it deduces, reasons, processes, weighs data, sorts values, compares, and analyzes to come to decisions.
Your right brain functions in a more primitive, childlike, suggestible, symbolic, visual ( sensory-based), spatial, holistic manner; it instantly processes information through instinct and intuition rather than logical thought.
These facts are well-known. What is not commonly known, but what I also believe to be true, is that
• your left brain functions as the center of your ego or conscious mind—your personal identity and intellect. It learns—takes in and processes information, data, beliefs, and values that you can access at will.
• your right brain functions (in ways we don't yet understand) as the center of your subconscious mind—unexamined beliefs, data, values, and associations that you cannot or do not readily access at will.
Later in this book you will learn more about the right and left brains' roles in intuition and in our sexual character. In this gateway we will focus on the role and influence of the conscious and subconscious minds in the quality and clarity of our life.
For now, understand that your brain and your whole body function best when both hemispheres work together, forming a whole greater than the sum of the parts, expanding both your powers of reason and your full creative capacities.
Shedding Light on the Subconscious
one important aspect of expanded awareness, healing, balance, and wholeness is making what is subconscious, conscious. That includes beliefs, thoughts, and memories.
The unconscious mind is that of which you are normally unaware and cannot usually access—the place of deep sleep, silence, stillness, and mystery. The unconscious mind is so mysterious, in fact, we don't know whether it even exists.
The subconscious mind is that of which you are normally unaware but can access—dreams, intuitions, beliefs, images, and other material. (The subconscious mind is the unexamined or uninspected mind.)
In this gateway (as in meditation), we direct the light of awareness into new and unexplored territory, illuminating the darkness, turning shadows into three-dimensional reality.
You have already learned that your subconscious mind also functions as your instinctive body wisdom and controls autonomic (involuntary) processes such as immune response and vital energy reserves (through endocrine and hormonal secretions). You also know some of the childlike qualities of the subconscious mind as it is related to motivation and will. (Those who refer to their “inner child” are actually pointing to their subconscious mind.) You need familiarity with your subconscious mind because the subconscious is the stream of random, discursive thoughts—the same field we access in dreams and in meditation.
Thoughts arise of their own accord, in a subliminal flow. Sometimes they get your conscious attention (you notice that you are thinking thoughts), but mostly they pass unnoticed, like a subconscious stream. These thoughts manifest as subliminal whispers, becoming moods, emotions, desires, and impulses. When unnoticed, they operate like hypnotic suggestions to influence your behavior. When you observe them consciously as thoughts (as you do in meditation), a healing takes place, because thoughts—fears, beliefs, and associations—are clarified in the light of awareness, lose their power to distort your reality, control your moods, or limit your life.
Filters of the Mind
An ancient spiritual proverb says, “The mind is the slayer of the real.” What does that mean, and how might it be important to your life? Look around you right now. What do you see? Listen to the sounds around you. What do you hear?
You experience the world through five primary senses: visual (sight), auditory (hearing), tactile ( touch), olfactory (smell), and gustatory (taste). But you do not take in these impressions directly, objectively, as they are. They pass through multilayered filters, colored and often distorted by your interpretations, expectations, assumptions, beliefs, associations, fears, desires, and opinions. You also perceive through cultural, religious, professional, educational, racial, and gender filters, created by your unique life experience.
Thus, for example, you don't just see or hear or taste. You see a barren or sad or interesting sight; you hear glorious or disappointing music; you taste delicious or bland food that reminds you of Grandmother's cooking. Reality becomes your reality; what is becomes replaced by what you think it is. A key principle to remember in taming your mind is that reality is not what you think.
If you happen to be hungry while walking in the city, eating establishments stand out. If you need money, you see banks. And as Ram Dass once said, quoting one of his teachings, “If a pickpocket stands in a crowd of saints, all he sees are their pockets.” (This makes me wonder what a proctologist sees.)
Having different filters, none of us see or hear exactly the same world. We view the same objects but perceive different meanings. As an unknown poet once wrote on a prison wall, “Two men looked out of prison bars; one saw mud and the other saw stars.”
Pictures about Reality
We do not see reality as it is; we see reality as we are—through the filter of our own personal experience. Two people ride a roller coaster; one screams with delight, the other with terror. One person imagines the next curve to be even more exciting; the other anticipates the car flying off the tracks. Our experience of life depends upon whether we have formed the habit of mentally sorting for—or expecting—pleasures or dangers.
Expectation determines perception. If you walk through a reputedly dangerous neighborhood, every large male stranger may look like a potential mugger. I recall a public service announcement that brought this point home. The television screen displays a photo of a serious-looking man of African heritage. Imagine this somber face as you read the following words: “Andrew Coombs: Vandalism and petty theft-14 years old. Aggravated assault-16. Grand theft auto-17. Armed robbery-20. Sought for murder at 24. Pursued and apprehended by Federal Marshal Bob Jones—pictured here.” Suddenly our assumptions are shattered.
To the degree your perception is distorted by a filter of associations or beliefs, you experience misunderstandings and miscommunications. Simple reality, as it unfolds in the present moment, is clouded by meanings, troubles, hurts, interpretations, and confusion.
Different Worlds
If you could see life through the eyes of someone else, the world might appear so different that you would think you were hallucinating. A chair would still be a chair, and an automobile would still be an automobile, but your thoughts, feelings, and associations about them might differ so much that you would have a radically different experience of them.
Even when we speak the same language, our personal filters account for much of the difficulties in communication. The same words have different meanings for different people. Try this simple experiment: Picture a horse in your mind's eye. Is it a mare or a stallion? Is it all white, or does it have markings? Where? How large is it? Approximately what age? Any other characteristics? Now put down the book and ask someone nearby to visualize a horse and to describe it to you. Chances are it will be a very different horse from the one you picture. Not only that, the two of you will have different feelings and associations about horses.
Given that we live in different worlds, it seems amazing to me that we understand one another at all.
Filters and Communication
Conflicting filters can cause communication problems in our relationships. Case in point: Reba's teenage son, Alex, gets home from school, goes directly to the refrigerator to pay homage to the God of Food, and then crashes on the sofa, television remote control in hand, for a few minutes of space time. Enter Reba. She sees Alex and remembers that he has a big exam coming up. Reba knows that Alex is a good student, with conscientious study habits. She is busy with her own project but wants to show interest in her son's life and studies, so before she returns to her office, she says, “Hi, Alex. How are your studies coming for the history exam on Friday?”
“Get off my back, will you, Mom?” Alex says defensively. “I'll get to my studies soon!”
Reba's intent was to show Alex that she is interested in and cares about what he is doing. When she says, “How are your studies coming?” Alex interprets these words through his own filter, hearing, “Hey, couch potato, why are you sitting here watching Idiot Youth Mating Rituals when you have work to do?”
When you understand your mind, or at least begin to recognize the filters you see and hear through, you will no longer suffer the illusion that you are hearing or seeing the real world. Rather, you are creating your own meanings, interpretations, and associations.
Setting aside subjective filters takes a little practice. The following two exercises are designed to provide an experience in objective listening, observing, and speaking—without subjective interpretations.
Listening Objectively
“Did you hear what I said?” All of us have heard that phrase, because few of us listen attentively to what people tell us. So we end up responding to what we heard ( through our own filters) rather than to what was said.
The first duty of love is to listen.
—Paul Tillich
You can practice objective listening by asking someone to tell you about themselves and their life and by paying close attention to precisely what is being said. As you hear the words, repeat them silently to yourself. By focusing in this way on what they actually say, you better understand their meaning rather than your meaning.
Seeing and Speaking Objectively
This exercise is both challenging and revelatory. For maximum benefits, do it with a partner and then do it alone.
First, sit facing your partner, observe his or her face closely, and then describe what you see without interpretation or value judgments. Name exactly what you see—shapes, colors, textures, tones, lines, not how it looks to you. Avoid subjective value judgments like “pretty, attractive, ugly, weird, or interesting.” Ask your partner how objective you were. Then ask your partner to describe you in the same way.
Next, stand alone before a mirror and observe your own face closely, then describe it objectively. Speak aloud. Notice carefully whether you are describing exactly what you see rather than interpreting what you see. This exercise clarifies the meaning of objective observation and also gives a rare chance to see yourself clearly.
By reducing the influence of your interpretations and associations on your perceptions, bringing you in more intimate contact with reality—and with other people—objective listening serves to tame your mind and bring you closer, in moments of attention, to everyday enlightenment.
The Two Kinds of Beliefs
There's an anecdote about an American Indian brave who asks his young son the color of a nearby pony. “It is white with brown spots—on this side.” This is a tale of knowledge based upon direct experience. He described only the side he could see.
Many of us believe that we operate, act, and make decisions based upon knowledge and direct experience. In reality we operate on innumerable beliefs and assumptions rather than on direct experience.
Unconscious beliefs are those we mistake for truth or reality. We don't say, “I believe this is so.” We say, “This is truth.” Unconscious beliefs lie at the root of fundamentalism; true believers zealously defend their beliefs and ideas as ultimate truth, confusing their opinions with the word of God. Such fundamentalism exists not only in the arena of religion, but in any field, any place, any time we are convinced that our way, our method, our ideas, are universally true.
A magnificent leap of awareness occurs when our beliefs become conscious, the instant we recognize them as our truth rather than as the truth. This is the first step in recognizing the illusory nature of thought. Thoughts, like the stuff of dreams, arise mysteriously from the psyche as naturally as waves on the sea. Thoughts are not a problem; it's only when we believe them, mistake them for reality, that we get into trouble.
Suffering is Optional
In any moment, your attention resides in one of two worlds: the objective world of what is happening or the subjective world of your thoughts and interpretations about what is happening. Only one is real.
Physical pain, for example, is an objective function of your nervous system. Mental and emotional pain are your subjective creation, based upon your own meanings and interpretations. Life has no consistent meanings except as you project your own meanings onto life. Good and bad depend upon your point of view. A Chinese farmer's son breaks his leg; this is bad. The army comes but cannot take him for war; this is good. The broken leg was first bad, then good.
Pain and Suffering
Pain is a relatively objective, physical phenomenon; suffering is our psychological resistance to what happens. Events may create physical pain, but they do not in themselves create suffering. Resistance creates suffering. Stress happens when your mind resists what is. If your spouse or lover leaves you, the amount of stress or suffering each of you experiences depends upon the meanings each of you places on the event. If you believe it to be good, that you are now free, you suffer less; if you believe it is bad, that you are now alone, you suffer more. The only problem in your life is your mind's resistance to life as it unfolds.
The mind…in itself, Can make a heav'n of hell, a hell of heav'n.
—John Milton
By accepting an event as it occurs—not passively, but by making the best of it—and by accepting your thoughts and feelings and acting constructively, you can reduce suffering and create greater ease and flow in your life. Such acceptance is the practice of everyday enlightenment. You tame your mind not by changing your world, but by changing your response.
Liberating Attention at the Source
As you pass through the twelve gateways, a central and recurring theme is the liberation of attention. We've seen how your attention can become trapped or monopolized by issues in each gateway. The most subtle and insidious attention trap, however, is the mind itself.
Imagine a television set turned on all day in the background of your mind. The volume moves up and down as your attention channel surfs through inner dramas. Sometimes you pay attention to what is going on in the world around you, to daily tasks and activities. Much of the time, however, you are drawn back to your internal television world.
When something happens in your world that demands your full attention, it pulls you away from the inner television world. At such times you feel you are living fully, intensely. Yet in any moment, you have the power to tame your mind by liberating your attention from the internal programs and dialogues simply by looking up and becoming more aware of the beauty of the real world.
Many of us drive down the highway of life for minutes or hours or years, lost in thought, daydreaming, worrying, wondering, in a kind of half-awake reverie, until we notice we have missed our exit, and most of the scenery on the way. The party continues, but we never quite show up. But when we recognize the subjective mind as a purveyor of illusions, we come to our senses. And instead of napping our way through life or flying on autopilot, we wake up and come alive.
The Illusion of a Quiet Mind
Most of us view the world through the mind without seeing the mind itself. Arising thoughts and impressions become our thoughts and impressions—become our truths. We believe our beliefs and interpretations the way a young child believes a movie is real. But at some point we wake up enough to suspect that the filters of our mind might actually be the source of our difficulties.
At this point we become interested in fixing, improving, or quieting our mind. As our insight grows, we notice how the mind plays like a radio tuned mostly to the noise of worries, concerns, regrets, and anxieties. We become seekers of positive thoughts or inner silence. And for the first time, we form an interest in meditation.
