A Cowboy Never Quits, page 17
Beside him, Jessica stiffened. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. Do the kids usually go into town?”
Wade didn’t want to have this conversation in front of her, and he also didn’t want to snap at her, or even try to explain while Aiden watched. This was why he should’ve kept his distance. Left that amazing night of dinner, dancing, and drinks in town. Now he felt like he was walking a tightrope.
“Excuse us for a sec,” Wade said, and Aiden nodded and backed up. Wade turned to face Jessica and forced his stern expression in place so he wouldn’t be too soft because of his personal feelings for her. “You’re not trying to interfere, are you?”
She scowled at him. A huff escaped as she crossed her arms. “Not trying, but I do tend to overachieve in a lot of areas.”
He appreciated her attempt at a joke, even though she’d delivered it too tensely for it to land.
Worry crept into her features. “What if she tries to run away? Or what if she’s in town and—”
“Aiden will take care of her.”
“Yeah, but what if she convinces him to drive her back home? Or they get into troub—”
“I know it’s not easy to let go of control, especially after everything you’ve been through with her, but if Aiden says she needs a break, I’d rather she get that with someone I trust. I trust him, and I need you to trust me.”
Her forehead scrunched up, making it clear there was an internal battle playing out in her head. She glanced around him at Aiden before her big, brown eyes returned to Wade. “Okay, so what if we just followed behind them a little bit? She wouldn’t have to know.”
He raised an eyebrow, and her scowl returned. This was usually where he’d be gruff and stern, but he was trying to strike a better balance, one where he was firm yet more understanding. “You brought her here because you knew we could help her, right?”
Jessica shrugged. “You’re asking me to accept defeat, and I don’t do that very well.”
He gripped her shoulders. “I’m asking you to trust the process. Trust that we know what we’re doing. Do you trust me?” he asked, and while it was a common enough question, he found himself holding his breath for the answer. Hoping she did.
“I do. That doesn’t mean I’ll always agree with everything you say.”
“Pfft. That’ll be the day. I’ll know it right away because I’ll look into the sky and there will be flying pigs.”
She tried damn hard to fight her smile but lost the battle. The muscles under his fingertips softened, hinting she was considering giving in. Putting her trust in him.
“Aiden will take care of her,” he repeated, because he could tell she needed to hear it. He told her he’d catch her later, and then went to give Aiden a lengthy lecture with lots of rules to ensure that nothing would happen in town that’d make a liar out of him.
Chapter 17
“This is my nightmare,” Chloe said as she took in the small-town diner. A moment ago Aiden had been telling her about their amazing burgers and shakes, which she could wholeheartedly get down with. She could even handle that the place went all rustic wood for the floors and booths, and while she wouldn’t choose horseshoes and a giant longhorn skull that emptily stared down at you as decorations, to each their own.
But the stools that had saddles where a round cushion should be made her want to sprint right back out the door. I almost forgot I was in hell.
Aiden placed his hand on her back and gave her a nudge toward the stools. Dang guy must’ve seen her urge to flee. “Don’t knock it before you try it. They’re actually pretty comfy.”
“You would say that.” She widened her legs and walked around the broad back end of the saddle before plopping herself down in the middle of the worn leather seat. When in the sticks…
Aiden settled into the stool next to her, looking perfectly at home in spite of his legs being way too long for the stirrups. When he’d first said he’d gotten permission for them to go into town, she’d thought he was playing the cruelest joke ever on her. That he’d add, “In a month, if you play your cards right,” or maybe “Psyche! I totally got you.”
Part of her even worried there’d be a line of adults waiting for them at the edge of the property, barring their escape. While she was getting used to the ranch and loved the times she got to climb into a saddle with a living and breathing horse under it, she’d felt increasingly restless in spurts. After her computer session today, she’d been ready to implode.
“Okay,” Aiden said, looking at her instead of picking up the laminated menu in front of him and focusing on it. “Let’s hear it. What’s wrong?”
“I’m on a stool shaped like a saddle. And my horse is an effing pole.” Chloe nudged her heels as if she were on Rowdy, then made a big show of trying to see why her horse wasn’t responding before knocking on the metal post. “I think he’s dead. Rigor mortis has set in.”
Aiden cocked his head, his expression making it clear he wasn’t buying her bullshit. “Is the guy still not responding?”
If she had hackles, they would’ve risen. “No, Tyler and I have been talking.”
Aiden continued to stare, and the dam of humor and sarcasm she’d erected to hold back her emotions cracked and began leaking at an alarming pace. The betrayal and doubt and panic and pain all rushed forward.
One minute she was grateful beyond belief to have Aiden as a friend, and the next she regretted that she’d made friends with him. He was far too observant, not to mention way too good at reading her. How could he read her so well after such a short time? Most people told her she was difficult to read, and she’d pretty much mastered shoving her feelings down deep, only to deal with them late at night when she was alone.
Which had never happened since she’d arrived in Silver Springs, so the lid on them kept rocking, the pressure building to a breaking point.
Her breaths grew thinner and thinner until there wasn’t any oxygen to be found. Aiden was going to see she was a fraud. Tyler didn’t love her anymore. Maybe her friends all thought she was stupid or crazy. Maybe Trinity was being a mean girl instead of a friend.
Even worse, what if she was crazy? What if Liza and Mom found out and she’d be here forever?
“Chloe. Look at me.” Aiden reached out and squeezed her shoulder. She saw him do it, yet she couldn’t feel it. Everything was getting fuzzy and swirling too fast. “I know something must’ve happened to make you so upset. Talk to me. Please.”
It was the please that got to her. It shot through the eye of the storm and provided her a lifeline to use to climb out. Then she could feel his fingers on her shoulder, and she focused on that. On the saddle underneath her and the smells of the diner. Gradually her thoughts and breaths calmed as the real world came back into focus.
She lifted her head and peered into Aiden’s green eyes. Eyes the exact color of the clover Rowdy was so fond of. A couple more deep breaths, and her lungs began functioning normally as well. “What do you want me to say? That sometimes Tyler’s amazing, and we talk about anything and everything. We even talk about the future, and he tells me things he says he’s never told anyone before…”
Chloe ran a thumbnail along the counter. Luckily, it came away clean, which made her feel better about eating here. “And sometimes he ignores me and takes days to respond, even though he doesn’t have limited internet time like I do. He knows that I don’t have a lot to look forward to and that I’m waiting to hear from him. And…” Seriously, what was it with Aiden? She’d gone from panic attack to spilling her guts, but talking about Tyler with him was too weird. She was probably overacting anyway. She waved her hand in front of her, as if she could bat away her last couple sentences. “Never mind. I’m sure it’s nothing.”
Aiden ran his fingers down her arm as he leaned closer, and she didn’t pull away. Or even look away. Maybe it was because he understood what she was going through in a way no one else did. He’d told her enough about his old crowd for her to draw some parallels to the people she’d been hanging out with. Yes, she’d done things she wouldn’t have if she hadn’t met them, but she’d made her own decisions. She wasn’t going to cop out and claim peer pressure. Honestly, she sometimes missed the mind-numbing effects going out with her crowd had provided.
“Why don’t you tell me,” Aiden said, his voice low, “and I’ll decide if it’s nothing.”
Since she was going to cave anyway—she was desperate to talk to someone about it and could no longer count on Mom for that, and Rowdy was awesome but not the best at coming up with solutions—she blurted out the thing that’d sent her into a tailspin. “My friend Trinity said Tyler was hanging out with this girl Kayla. But it’s okay for him to have friends,” she said before Aiden could say anything she might not want to hear. “So like I said, I’m sure it’s nothing. Like I have you as a friend, and that doesn’t mean anything.”
The corners of his mouth tightened. “Gee, thanks.”
“You know what I mean.”
“I can also read between the lines and have too much experience with manipulative jerks.”
Chloe placed her hand on his knee. “Please don’t, Aiden. Don’t say something that’ll ruin the afternoon and our chance to escape the ranch for a while. Because then I’ll start overthinking and worrying again, and my breaths will come faster and faster until I can’t breathe at all. I just want to sit on my invisible horse and order a milkshake.” She squeezed his knee and implored his eyes with hers. “Okay?”
He covered her hand, and her stomach rose as if her invisible horse had just reared into the air and left her trying to cling on so she wouldn’t fall. “Okay.”
* * *
Aiden glanced across the cab of the truck at Chloe. Yeah, he’d noticed she was pretty. He tried not to notice it so much, but with the sun setting behind her like that, lighting up her profile, it was pointless. The other problem was that the more time they spent together, the more time he wanted to spend with her. It was more than because she was pretty, too.
She was smart. She liked to pretend she didn’t have a heart of gold, but he’d seen her around Rowdy. Not to mention all the help she’d given him on his math homework, and often during her free time when she could be doing something more fun. Sure, she could turn icy cold in a flash, but now he saw it was the wall she threw up in an attempt to keep herself safe. And some asshole had broken through and was taking advantage of that.
Aiden tore his gaze off her and checked the time. Wade said they had to be back before dinner, even though they’d eaten, and he didn’t argue. They had a whole ten minutes to spare. As soon as they arrived at the ranch, he might lose the chance to really talk to her, especially alone, for a day or two.
That made up his mind, and he slowed at the end of the driveway and put the truck in park.
“Ooh, do I get to drive now?” Plying Chloe with sugar might’ve been a bad idea. She’d practically bounced through the shops along Main Street after she’d downed a pop and a milkshake. Not only was it entertaining, it was also cute as hell, and he’d fought the urge to grab her hand and hold it so many times he’d lost count.
“Do you even have your license?” he asked.
Her smile widened, as if that would be enough for him not to notice the answer was obviously no. “You wanna get me in trouble?”
“I’ll tell them I fought you for it—that it was all me. They’ll believe me, because in addition to being wicked strong, I’m the delinquent and you’re all reformed.”
“Not that reformed,” he said before he’d thought better of it. Honestly, he wished he didn’t have any desire to return to his old life. He didn’t really. Occasionally he thought about how it’d been easier, freer in some ways—until he’d tangled with the law, that was—but he loved it here. Loved the horses, and the Dawsons were amazing. Kind and funny, hardworking and loving. Even though he balked at the rules now and again, guidelines were better than realizing no one gave a shit where you were or what happened to you.
Part of him still had a wall up himself, worried that if he made the wrong move, they’d send him back.
Like, say, if he leaned across the cab and kissed Chloe.
Extra-bad idea, since he’d already gotten in trouble with the Dawsons for something similar. About a month into his stint in the program, he’d met a girl from Silver Springs who’d been looking for a way to piss off her parents, and he’d fit the bill. In her parents’ eyes, he was the bad boy who’d taken advantage of a good girl, and he’d almost been sent to juvie because of it.
Jess would probably feel the same about him kissing her daughter, and the Dawsons would be pissed, thinking he hadn’t learned his lesson.
Chloe would probably be pissed as well, considering she had a boyfriend. Who didn’t deserve her.
“Aiden? Is this where you tell me you have a plan? Does it involve spoons and tunneling at night?” She gently nudged his shoulder, and he snapped out of his thoughts of the past and what he wanted to do with his present. It also reminded him that this wasn’t about him. This was about Chloe.
He cleared his throat and deliberated on the best way to say something he knew she wouldn’t like. Here it goes anyway. “Have you told Liza about the panic attacks?”
Her eyes went wide, her lips parting.
“Yeah, I put two and two together. Even someone as bad at math as I am can figure that one out.”
As expected, she threw up her shields, the line of her jaw going tight. “That’s none of your business.” She reached for the door handle. “I think I’ll walk the rest of the way.”
He reached across her to hold the door closed, only realizing how close it brought his body to hers after his fingers were wrapped around the handle and her lips were mere inches from hers. “Chloe, don’t be mad. Remember that part about how we’re friends? I’m just worried about you.”
The ice thawed, and her lip trembled as tears rose to her eyes.
Dammit. Now he felt horrible and wanted to abort the conversation, even though he knew someone needed to have it with her, and he was afraid he was the only person who’d figured it out.
“My anxiety has just been a little out of control this year,” she said. “It’s not a big deal.”
“Then it won’t be a big deal to tell Liza.”
Chloe shook her head. “She’ll just tell my mom, and then I’ll be trapped here forever.”
He tried not to let that offend him, since at one point he’d felt the same way. “She won’t. The stuff you tell her is confidential. If you truly want to leave, let her help you. It’s not like she doesn’t know something is up. Once you tell her and start dealing with it, you’ll make more progress with the staff and be out of here before you know it.”
“I…” Her fingers slipped off the door handle, and then she twisted to face him, her knee bumping his thigh as she tucked her leg under her. “Don’t get me wrong. I love riding more than I ever thought, and certain aspects are growing on me.” She gave him a small smile as she studied him. “I’m glad I have you to talk to. But I don’t belong here. And I need to get back before…”
“Before your boyfriend cheats on you?”
The line of her shoulders snapped tight, and he swore under his breath. That was the opposite of getting her to listen and open up.
“I’m sorry,” he said, softening his voice. “I shouldn’t have said that.”
“No, you shouldn’t have.” She bit her lower lip. “But maybe you’re right. Does that make me pathetic?”
The way her voice cracked at the end killed him. “No. It makes him pathetic.”
Her smile turned sad, and she returned to facing the windshield, her gaze focused on the road in front of the truck. Obviously that meant she was done talking, and he wasn’t sure there was anything he could’ve said to make her listen. He’d never been good at the talking-it-out parts of a relationship.
Looked like that carried over to being friends with a girl as well.
He shifted the truck into gear and drove them to the ranch. As he pulled up in front of the main cabin, he caught the figure at the window. Wade pulled back the curtain and peered out at them.
With their talk, they’d cut it closer than he planned, only two minutes early.
“Thank you for getting me out for a few hours,” Chloe said. “I really needed it, and I appreciate it more than you’ll ever know.”
He knew. He’d been there. Yet he still didn’t have the answers to change it.
The slam of the door echoed in his ears, and Aiden gripped the steering wheel tighter, fighting the urge to hunt down the guy who’d hurt her and give him a piece of his mind.
Chapter 18
What was I thinking? I should’ve known better than to push my luck.
Jess had come a long way when it came to recognizing what foods felt and looked like before they turned into something edible, and she was forever working on having more patience. Over the past week she’d also watched dozens of YouTube tutorials on dough. While she’d done her homework, she’d thought Kathy would be here to help keep her from screwing up this part of tonight’s dinner.
But Mrs. Dawson had gone into town earlier this afternoon, and Jess figured she’d go ahead and get started, an hour-ago version of her far too optimistic.
The door to the kitchen opened and she held her breath, hoping that meant Kathy had returned.
Instead, a familiar tan cowboy hat appeared, the stack of freshly washed dishes blocking the rest of him for a moment before Wade stepped into full view. Then she held her breath for an entirely different reason.
“Hey,” he said.
“Hey,” she replied, because he hadn’t given her a whole lot to work with.
