All About Max, page 10
The nine people in Mrs. Dumpty’s room were:
Commander King Cole, the naval officer
Ms. Bo Peep, detective
Coach Winkie, basketball coach
Dr. Mrs. Muffet, anthropologist
Dr. Humpty, professor of astronomy
Mrs. Diddle, prize-winning artist
Officer Dickory, medal-winning police officer
Dr. Doodle, veterinarian
Mr. Tweedle-dee, animal trainer
“Max,” said Mrs. Dumpty, “I believe you’ve met all these nice people, who are very grateful to you for taking the big risk to yourself of warning us last night. And I want to tell you that they all agree with me completely that you shouldn’t be here doing what you’re doing, especially as I’ve told them your sad story. I hope you don’t mind that I’ve done that, do you, darlin’?”
Max could only shake his head for he hardly knew what to say.
“But have you ever asked him that other question?” asked Ms. Bo Peep.
“Oh dear, I’m afraid not,” said Mrs. Dumpty.
“Well, hadn’t you better?” said Mrs. Diddle. “There is one thing, they all rather wanted to know, darlin’, and I suppose I should have asked you,” said Mrs. Dumpty. “To be truthful, have the Measley girls talked to you about...well, doing any special favors for them and then, well, rewarding you for doing them? They’ve made such offers to others of us here, and naturally they’ve been turned down. But we all think it...well, that it might be very difficult for someone your age suddenly finding yourself in this terrible life to refuse. And now especially after what you found us doing last night, and remembering what Commander King Cole mentioned about how persuasive the Measley girls can be...”
“If...if...if what you’re talking about is tattling, well, they have asked me. And I told them ‘yes” I’d do it!” said Max.
There were ten collective gasps of horror from everyone.
It was all Max could do to keep a straight face.
“But Officer Dickory,” Max said, “I’d like to ask you something. I guess you know a lot about criminals. Do you know of any criminal who might be going to rob a house, or even a bank, and comes to tell you which house or which bank he plans to rob, and when he plans to do it?”
“That would be pretty stupid,” said Officer Dickory.
“So,” said Max, “why would I tell you I’m going to be spying for the Measley’s if I’m really going to? If you all want to know, the reason I said ‘yes’ is that I suddenly had this great idea right while they were asking me. I’m going to make up stories to tell them. I’ve even thought of a couple. I could tell them Dr. Humpty is secretly planning to go on the next trip to the moon, or Commander King Cole is planning to sail around the world in a sailboat all by himself. You can all help me make up stories. Serve them right!”
The collective looks of horror on ten faces were suddenly transformed into ten collective looks of surprise, followed by wide smiles.
“There, you see!” said Mrs. Dumpty triumphantly. “Only a boy, indeed! I just knew I wasn’t making a mistake.”
“Of course, you weren’t!” said Coach Winkie. “We really knew it all along.”
“Yes, we did!”
“Certainly, we did!”
“Not know it all along? Why the very idea!”
Nobody wanted to be left out of letting everyone else know that they never had had any doubt about it, and how clever Max was to have come up with the idea, and why hadn’t anyone else thought of it. It was quite a while before everyone settled back down.
“I suppose they offered you chocolates?” said Ms. Bo Peep.
“Oh yes,” said Max. “I told them chocolates make me break out in spots. I asked for money instead.”
“And those skinflints actually agreed to that?” said Mrs. Diddle.
“They said ‘yes’,” said Max.
“What a clever boy!” said Dr. Humpty. “And what do you propose to do with the money?”
Max looked down at the toes of his shoes for help, but didn’t get much from that source. “I...I thought I might need it when I...I run away.”
“Run away!” several voices cried at once.
“Oh, but you can’t do that, darlin’,” said Mrs. Dumpty. “We want you to stay, we do indeed!”
Everyone nodded hard, and nodded, and nodded yet again.
“Yes!”
“Yes!”
“Yes!”
“You mustn’t even think about it!”
“We won’t let you go, will we?”
“No!”
“No!”
“No!”
“Oh well,” said Max. “It’s not definite. As I said, I’m only just thinking about it.”
“Well, please do stop thinking about it, darlin’” said Mrs. Dumpty. “We don’t want to hear another word about it. You’re the one bright spot that’s come into our lives in a long time. You know, don’t you that unless Moose takes us on the bus on an emergency trip to town, we’re never allowed out of the building. Didn’t I tell you that?”
Max shook his head.
“Well, it’s true,” said Coach Winkie. “Why do you suppose I have a basketball hanging from a door in my room?”
“Or why I only paint pictures mostly of the scene from my window?” said Mrs. Diddle.
“Or why I can only look through my telescope from my room?” said Dr. Humpty.
“It’s been this way since the Measley girls took over Dolly Manor from the Dolly’s and turned it into Measley Manor,” said Dr. Mrs. Muffet.
“Yes, and now gone and hired those two horrors, Digger and Dork, to patrol the grounds,” said Mrs. Diddle. “It’s supposed to be to keep out intruders, but we all know it’s to keep us in. We’ve all suspected there’s just something they don’t want us to find or find out.”
“And what you’ve told us about their night excursion pretty much confirms that, wouldn’t you all say?’”
All nodded at once.
“But we’ll talk about that shortly,” said Mrs. Dumpty. “I know Max must want to learn why we were out there having a...a stroll. First I think it would be fun to let him know about the little something we do for entertainment and to keep out spirits up as well. Don’t you think we should?”
All heads in the room nodded.
“Well, Max, darlin’,” said Mrs. Dumpty. “The something we do is fortune telling. And I’m the one that does it, so you can help me carry out my crystal ball from my closet.”
“It’s not really a crystal ball,” she whispered to him as she brought down from the closet shelf a cut crystal bowl filled with scraps of paper. “These are just fortunes from fortune cookies I saved over the years. I believe most passionately in fortune cookie fortunes.”
“Me too,” said Max. “Does everyone know that’s where the fortunes come from?”
“Oh, I suspect they do, as I may have dropped a hint or two,” said Mrs. Dumpty. “But nobody wants to spoil the fun by mentioning it. At any rate, what I say is that a fortune is a fortune is a fortune, even if it comes from a cookie. Don’t you agree?”
“I do,” said Max, who actually did.
When they emerged from the closet, Mrs. Dumpty returned to her chair and Max dropped down on the floor beside her.
“Now, darlin’,” she said. “You hold the bowl for me while I say the magic words over it so it will give up the fortunes.”
“Abracadabra,” she said, closing her eyes and waving her hand over the bowl. “Tell us our fortunes, oh wonderful bowl!”
Then she dipped her hand into the bowl, and pulled out a scrap of paper.
Closing her eyes and waving her other hand over the paper, she said, “This fortune is for Commander King Cole.”
Then she opened her eyes and read, “The skills you have learned will one day come in handy.”
“Splendid!” said Commander King Cole. “Just the thing to know for that trip I plan to go sailing solo around the world!”
This brought laughs all around.
Mrs. Dumpty continued pulling fortune-cookie fortunes from her bowl, and something was said about ever one.
For Ms. Bo Peep: “You will have a very remarkable and rewarding surprise.”
Was it to find an exciting fingerprint, perhaps?
For Coach Winkie: “Your skill will soon bring skills to another.”
Could the “another” be Max shooting baskets?
For Dr. Mrs. Muffet: “A thrilling time is in your immediate future.”
Would somebody bring her an exciting artifact some day?
For Dr. Humpty: “You will find something amazing if you keep looking.”
Could he be the one to discover a new star in his window telescope?
For Mrs. Diddle: “Your past success will be overshadowed by your future success.”
Could she enter one of the paintings of the view from her window in a contest and win a prize?
For Officer Dickory: “Do not be surprised if you have an exciting event in your future.”
Would he hunt down a wanted criminal, and earn another medal?
For Dr. Doodle: “Your skills might once again be useful.”
Would she be able to take care of Moxie and Mojo some day?
For Mr. Tweedle-dee: “Something you love will return to your life.”
Would he be allowed to train Moxie and Mojo so they wouldn’t lose all their good manners?
For Mrs. Dumpty herself: “Your skill will accomplish what many other cannot.”
Could it be that Mrs. Dumpty might make all their fortunes come true?
Max sitting there holding the bowl was beginning to have some very mixed-up feelings about his former old-people thoughts. It seemed to him that they were all stuck here, not even allowed to walk outside, and yet they all managed to be pleased with their ridiculous “fortunes” which hadn’t the chance of a snowflake in summer of coming true.
“And now, darlin’, here’s one for you,” said Mrs. Dumpty, breaking into his thoughts.
“There is yet time for you to take a different path,” she read.
So there it was, thought Max. If this didn’t make up his mind about making another attempt at running away, what would?
But the same thought must have occurred to all of the rest of them in the room.
“I don’t like that fortune at all,” said Dr. Doodle.
“Well, I certainly don’t,” said Commander King Cole.
“I think he should have a second one,” said Ms. Bo Peep. “All in favor raise their right hand.”
Every right hand in the room was raised. Hesitantly, Max raised his as well. Back into the bowl went Mrs. Dumpty’s hand.
“Abracadabra!” said Mrs. Dumpty with closed eyes. The room fell silent, no one saying a word as she rummaged and rummaged in the bowl, and finally pulled out a fortune.
“Depart not from the place to which fate has brought you, and you will have thrilling events unfold in your life.”
Smiles replaced the worried looks on every face in the room.
“Well then, that’s settled!” said Commander King Cole cheerfully.
Max could hardly help grinning himself, even though in his mind the subject had not exactly been settled.
“Now that we’ve done fortunes,” said Ms. Bo Peep, “aren’t we going to explain to Max why we were out...um...strolling in the forest at night?”
“Well, we’ve all agreed that we should,” said Commander King Cole, “including me. So I believe he needs to see the map.”
“What...what map is that?” Max asked.
“A document I found hidden way in the back of my closet, darlin’” said Mrs. Dumpty. “It simply fell on the floor one day when I was pulling something off a shelf. We all decided it could be a map of everything around Measley Manor.”
“There are some markings on it which we believe might lead to something interesting around here,” said Officer Dickory. “We think it’s why the Measley girls don’t want us prowling around.”
“Yes, and hired those two goons to see that we don’t!” exclaimed Dr. Doodle.
Max sat frozen as his conversation with the Measley girls slowly played back in his head. “Just let us know if anything unusual is going on that we should know about if anyone finds some...er...curious old papers like maps that really belong to us.”
“What is it, Max, darlin’?” asked Mrs. Dumpty.
Max had to swallow and swallow again before he could squeeze out the words. “When the Measley’s tried to get me to promise about spying, they told me to let them know if...if anyone finds some...some...curious old papers like maps that really belong to them.”
This revelation was greeted with a stunned silence.
“Well, Officer Dickory, does it?” asked Ms. Bo Peep.
Officer Dickory thought this over. “I’d have to say it probably belongs to whoever occupied this room once. We’ll...ahem...make an effort to find the owner, of course.”
“But that won’t be easy, will it?” asked Mr. Tweedle-dee. “We’re not allowed to go anywhere.”
“Exactly,” said Officer Dickory. “So we’ll just hang on to it until we find the rightful owner. If the Measley’s don’t let us go anywhere to do this, so be it. And may I suggest we all just keep our mouths tightly shut on the matter? Are we all agreed on this? Might I have a show of hands?”
All hands were raised, including the hand of Max, even though he was not officially a member of the Mother Goose-ites.
“But the question remains,” said Coach Winkie. “How are we going to do anything about the telltale markings if we can’t leave the building to go exploring? We all think it might have something to do with the old cemetery, but what is anyone’s guess?”
Max hesitated and then cleared his throat. And then cleared it again.
“Yes, darlin’?” said Mrs. Dumpty. “Would you like to say something about this?”
“Well, would you trust me with the map? Well, me and Mitzi, that is. She’s invited me to go exploring.”
Glances were exchanged around the room.
“Exploring where, Max darlin’?” asked Mrs. Dumpty.
“I have no idea,” replied Max. “She did ask if I was afraid of spooky places. That sounds like a cemetery to me.”
“We do trust you, Max,” said Officer Dickory, “but I’m afraid we don’t know about Mitzi. She’s a nice young person, but how do we know the Measley’s haven’t gotten to her with their spying proposals.”
“Oh, they have!” said Max. Then he grinned soon as he saw the looks of dismay on all the Goose-ite faces. “But she gave them a bunch of hooey just the way I did. Said she’d do it for chocolates, but she thinks it’s a big joke. If you trust me, I know you can trust her as well.”
“Then I say we let the two of them have the map,” said Commander King Cole. “Can we have another show of hands?”
All hands went up. And so it was settled. Mrs. Dumpty went to her closet, and returned with a folded piece of paper, stained and brown with age. It crackled as she unfolded it and handed it to Max. The old people were right. It did look as if it could be a map of Measley Manor or at least a building that might have once stood in the same place, and the land surrounding it, going all the way down to the shore. A faded X in the middle of it could be about the location of the old cemetery.
“You’ll take good care of it, won’t you, darlin’?” said Mrs. Dumpty.
Those really cool, nice old people trusting him with their precious map? You bet Max would take good care of it! He would guard it with his life.
It would stay right on his personal person in his jeans pocket. Snitch, the Measley girls and the goons would have to kill him to get to it.
As for the running-away roller coaster. Well, for the moment it had definitely inched way back up from rock bottom. After all, what if that second fortune proved to be right?
Chapter XVIII
In which Max explains “all” to Mitzi, they go exploring with Moxie and Mojo, and find a definite connection between a cemetery and some very suspicious and sinister shovel activity.
I t was a good thing Saturday was only the next day after Max met with the Mother Goose-ites, and left the room with the precious, and it must be said, super mysterious map in his jeans pocket. He had actually folded the jeans and slept with them under his pillow. He was going to take no chances of having it away from his person for more than the time it took to climb into his pajamas. No way! No how!
He was busting at the seams to talk to Mitzi. Wait until she heard all that he had to tell her! And all the while he was counting the hours until he saw her, he was putting two and two together. Digger and Dork with shovels and lanterns. The Measley girls crawling around at night. Mitzi asking him if he was afraid of spooky places. The old map with what looked liked markings that might mean something very important. It all added up to CEMETERY!
Did shovels mean digging up...what...bodies? Max decided he wouldn’t think about that. Not yet anyway. Well, it didn’t involve his body, did it? Better not think about that interesting idea either.
As soon as Max poked his head into the kitchen, caught Mitzi’s eye and motioned her out, they crept out and down the stairs to his room, which Max decided was the safest place to “reveal all”.
“Wow!” said Mitzi. “Is this where you actually live?”
“Yeah,” said Max. “The Taj Mahal!”
“It might not be forever,” said Mitzi hopefully, then less hopefully, “Will it?”
“I’m not planning on it,” said Max.
“You’re not still thinking of that loony idea of running away, are you?” said Mitzi.
“Does it matter?” asked Max.
“I thought I had made that clear, stupid,” replied Mitzi.
Max shrugged. “Well, I...I don’t know. The subject is...still on the table. But what I was referring to was Mrs. Dumpty’s fortune cookie fortune for me.”
“What goofy idea are you talking about?” asked Mitzi.
“I was coming to that,” replied Max. “I got in on a session with the Mother Goose-ites. Mrs. Dumpty tells their fortune from fortune cookies. Mine said, ‘Depart not from the place to which fate has brought you, and you will have thrilling events unfold in your life.”
