Battered Soul: Mail Order Brides of Spring Water Book Three, page 9
Framing her face with his hands, Willis gave Iris one last kiss. “Yes.” He was too choked up to say anything more. He walked to the door of the office and hesitated. He wanted to turn and get one last look at her, but they’d said their goodbyes, and he didn’t think he could take it. He opened the door and left.
* * *
Iris could barely breathe but she asked for water and a cloth. She wanted to press the cloth against her swollen eyes. She’d stand tall and proud with all the dignity she could muster. Last words! She didn’t ask him what she should say. It didn’t matter really, since he wouldn’t be there, and somehow knowing he would not watch gave her strength.
Finally, it was time. Her eyes were as good as they would get. She braided her hair, so it hung down her back and then tried to smooth the wrinkles out of her skirt with her hands. With her head high, she walked out of the cell and waited for Major Cooke to put the irons on her wrist.
Fear had left. The heartbreak was still there, but she was no longer afraid to die. God was with her, walking out of the sheriff’s office with her. There were so many people all trying to get a close look at her. Kent and Max helped to push people back. It wasn’t a far walk at all, and the gallows loomed large. The steps were in front of her, how many were there? After nodding her thanks to both Kent and Max, she went up the first step. McGregor looked so smug standing at the top and she leveled him with a glare.
Suddenly she was yanked off the step and through the air until she slammed back against a hard chest. She struggled to get back to the steps and bruising hands held on to her arms. Was she not allowed her dignity? McGregor’s face grew red with anger causing her to still.
Parker swept her up and carried her quickly into the sheriff’s office. Fear shrouded her. If they spared her a day, she’d rather just get it over with. Saying goodbye again would be unbearable.
Cooke took the irons off of her, and the surrounding noise was so excessive she couldn’t hear what was happening. She walked toward the cell and waited for Major Cooke to open it for her. She wouldn’t be able to keep her promise to Lex. She was trying her hardest not to weep, but one tear and then another flowed down her cheeks. Why was it so crowded? It was getting too hard to breathe. Why wasn’t the cell being opened for her?
Captain McGregor came in shouting. He, she heard. Turning she stared at him.
“Ulysses S Grant gave the order! You would go against the U.S. Secretary of War? Your career in the Army is over Major Cooke. I’ll carry her up the steps if I have to!” McGregor raged trying to push his way toward her.
McGregor drew his gun and aimed it at Cooke. “You fool! Stanton is back as the Secretary of War. How stupid can you be? He’s known Iris since she was a baby. You touch one hair on her head, and I’ll string you up!”
“That she-witch is not Iris! Iris died, Julie survived. Are all of you blind?” McGregor pulled his weapon and turned to shoot Iris.
She closed her eyes and heard the shot, waited for the pain. None came. Cautiously, she opened her eyes and glanced about. McGregor lay on the floor, dead. His eyes were still open, but he wasn’t breathing.
Iris opened her mouth, but no sound came out. She would have fallen to the ground if Parker hadn’t caught her and swung her up into his arms again. She put her arms around his neck and hid her face against his chest.
“Let’s get you home,” he whispered as he carried her out of the jail and down the boardwalk. He stopped and transferred her into the strong arms of another.
* * *
“She doesn’t seem to know who I am. She’s shaking like a leaf,” Willis said accepting a blanket from Max to cover Iris with.
“She might be in shock or something. We’ve seen it before in a few soldiers,” Max told him.
“I’ll drive us out of town and then we can stop and see.” Parker didn’t wait for a reply as he urged the horses forward and drove the wagon toward the end of town. He stopped at the boulder where they’d left their guns.
“I never felt so helpless as I did in that jail without a gun,” Kent said as he strapped his gun belt on.
“What happened?” Willis asked, moving to the edge of the wagon bed so the others could lay their bedrolls on the bottom for Iris.
“McGregor was tight with Grant, but Grant resigned as Secretary of War when he realized Stanton was fired unjustly. President Johnson is in some hot water. Stanton knows who Iris is. He must have known her family,” Parker explained.
Willis laid Iris in the middle of bed they’d made. He started to sit up but she wouldn’t let him go.
Kent shrugged and put the last blanket down, covering the two of them.
“Parker, you have contacts at the Capital?” Willis asked.
“I had hoped so. We weren’t always at war. I’m just grateful for the help.” Parker jumped to the wagon seat. “Let’s get home.”
Not knowing what to say, Willis nodded. He turned onto his back and pulled Iris so her head lay on his chest. She burrowed as close to him as she could. She still shook, and it worried him, but she was alive. He swallowed back tears. Thank you, God, thank you.
He stroked her arms and back, kissed her forehead and talked sweetly to her, but she didn’t respond. But she held on to him the whole ride home. Everything would be fine. They’d plan their wedding as soon as possible, and he’d work double time to get their house ready. He didn’t want to be parted from her again.
When the wagon stopped, Willis required help to get both himself and Iris out of the wagon bed. She gripped him tightly and would not let go of him. He carried her up the steps and through the door of Parker and Georgie’s house and sat down in the parlor, cradling her on his lap.
Parker and Georgie exchanged worried expressions. He heard a few whispers, and before he knew it they were alone.
Iris stopped shaking, but she wept soundlessly. He rocked her and crooned to her as he’d seen mothers do to their children. He didn’t know what else to do.
“I’m not dead,” she finally whispered.
“No, my love, you certainly aren’t.”
She sighed heavily, drew back enough so she could see his face and then put her head on his shoulder and slept.
Georgie finally tiptoed in and whispered to Willis. “Take her upstairs. I know I can trust you to be a gentleman, so sleep with her. Keep her in your arms and make her feel safe.”
He held Georgie’s gaze for a moment before he nodded. Then he stood up with Iris in his arms. She barely stirred as he carried her up the stairs. He laid her on the bed and took her shoes off. He took off his gun belt and boots before he climbed into bed with her. There wasn’t much room, but he didn’t mind; it meant having her close.
He thanked God over and over for His mercy while he watched her sleep. Finally, he closed his eyes.
Chapter Nine
Iris opened her eyes and took a deep breath. She was in her room with Lex. She was still alive! The pain she’d gone through tempered her joy. She’d loved Lex too much, and thinking she’d be gone from him forever had ripped out her heart. It wasn’t good to allow another to get so close. The agony was worse than when her family had been killed.
Someday she’d be hunted by the ex-Confederates and it would happen all over again. They wouldn’t allow goodbyes; they’d just throw a rope over the nearest tree. She’d never be safe. It felt so right in Lex’s arms, but this would have to be the last time. It would probably be best if she left, but where would she go?
Perhaps she should go up North as she had planned before. She needed to think with a clear head. Waiting a week or two wouldn’t hurt. Her head lay on his shoulder and her hand was over his heart. It would hurt him, but it was for the best. There would never be a love like the one she’d shared with Lex, but that was the whole point.
His eyes opened, surprising her. He smiled a long lazy smile. “Good morning.”
“Good morning. I’d best get up and help around here.”
“Stay in my arms for just a minute more. I like having you near me.”
What could she say? She stayed silent as he held her tight. If she had any more tears, she’d have cried, but she was all cried out. This would be harder than she thought. But courage and strength would get her where she needed to be.
He slowly let go and sat up. “Do you need anything before I go downstairs?”
She wanted to reach up and caress his whiskered cheek. It wasn’t often she’d seen him unshaved. But she shook her head instead. Her voice couldn’t be trusted. She watched him leave, and she hardened her resolve to stay away from him. What else could she do?
Standing, she discovered she was bone weary. Something drew her gaze across the room. Her suitcase lay on Sondra’s bed. How had it gotten there? She opened it and all her belongings were inside. How strange. At least she had clean clothes. She grabbed what she needed and got dressed. Her dress was wrinkled, but she didn’t care. Where was Sondra? Had she been told to give Iris and Willis their privacy last night?
Iris looked with longing at her bed. It would be so easy to climb back in, but she had a job. She walked down the stairs and went straight into the kitchen. To her dismay, everyone was there: Veronica and Max, Glory and Kent, Georgie and Parker… and Lex. The others each had their children with them, and it hurt to see what she’d never have. But she pasted a smile on her face.
Georgie hugged her first, then Iris hugged each of the others. Lex was the last, and she couldn’t help but stiffen in his arms. No more one more time to remember; it would never be enough.
“Where is Sondra?”
“I sent her to spend time with Walter. She wasn’t happy here,” Parker explained.
“My suitcase?”
Kent spoke up. “Major Cooke gave it to me. It was with McGregor’s things.”
She nodded, trying to take it all in. Lex tried to put his arm around her, but she moved away and the hurt on his face was almost more than she could bear. “Does anyone need coffee or something to eat?”
“Sit down,” Georgie told her.
Glory put a full cup of coffee in front of her, and Veronica placed a plate full if flapjacks and bacon in front of her.
“Don’t forget the syrup,” Max said as he put it on the table.
“Thank you.” She stared at her coffee then her food.
“I guess we should give you some breathing room,” Parker suggested.
They filed out, and she sighed in relief.
A voice from behind her startled her. “Do you want me to leave too?” Lex stayed behind her, and she could tell by his tone that he knew something was wrong.
“Please. I need to be alone.” She didn’t look up as he passed her and went out the door. Staying was not a good idea. She ate a few bites and drank her coffee. Then she donned an apron and cleaned the kitchen. Her nerves were shot, and she jumped at the littlest of sounds, even those she made herself by washing the dishes.
When she was done, she put on a straw hat, intent to see what was in the garden to pick for supper. She reached for the basket and was on her way to the back door when Georgie came back in.
“I didn’t mean for you to do any work today.”
“I can’t sit around and think about what almost happened. I need to keep busy.”
Georgie nodded. “You’re different. I guess it’s the shock of everything that happened. From what I hear you were walking up to the platform before they freed you. It must have been awful. I planned to come see you, but it happened so fast.”
“It was fast, yet it was so slow all at the same time. I feel different, and I’ve had a lot of time to think while in the cell.”
Georgie tilted her head as though she was waiting for more, but there was no more Iris wanted to say.
“I’m going out to the garden.”
Georgie gave her an odd smile.
* * *
Willis gave the newest trained horse quite a workout. He rode him long and perhaps too hard. He kept going over everything in his head, but he didn’t know what he’d done to make Iris so standoffish. He longed to hold her, but she flinched when he tried to touch her.
She had so many excuses why she couldn’t sit or walk with him, and she seemed to resent it if he stayed for supper. He’d taken to eating his meals at the bunkhouse again. He didn’t have the heart to work on the house. He didn’t believe he’d ever live there.
Her smiles were few but worst of all they were never for him. It hurt him more than he was willing to admit. He played it off to the others by saying he never wanted to get tied down, anyway. Iris never broke the engagement, but he knew. He didn’t feel comfortable on the ranch anymore, and he wondered what he should do.
He deserved an explanation, but what if she said something he couldn’t accept? Her rejection hurt him in a way he’d never felt before. He tried to avoid her, but she was everywhere it seemed. He’s never been so alone and miserable.
He owned a piece of worthless property. He had more than enough money saved. It was time to go.
As he rode the horse to the barn, he saw Kent and Max stop talking. He was often the topic of conversation he bet, no he knew. That made it all the more painful. He dropped to the ground. “The mare’s ready to be sold. I hate to do this, but I’m leaving. I have land of my own.”
Max’s eyes widened. “You always said the land was so worthless that weeds wouldn’t even grow on it.”
Kent stepped forward and put his hand on Willis’ shoulder. “I know you’re having a hard time, but don’t leave. We’ve been like brothers for the longest time now.”
Willis’ throat felt raw, and he swallowed hard. “It won’t be forever. I can’t get over Iris and seeing her every day is making it impossible. I can’t take it anymore. I keep wondering what I did wrong. I’m leaving today as soon as I get packed up.”
He turned and walked toward the bunkhouse. The heat of their gazes was on his back. He had to go now, or he’d never go. He went into the bunkhouse and grabbed his saddlebags. He packed as much as would fit. It hit him that he really had nothing of value. He had more than a drifter would possess, barely.
“I hear you’re going to your place,” Parker said.
Willis turned and nodded. “I haven’t been back there since before the war. The house has probably fallen down by now. It’s difficult to leave but…”
“I understand, and I’ve watched what you’ve been going through. I wish I had words of wisdom for you, but I don’t. Come back when you can. You’re part of all of us.”
“I will.” Willis slung his saddlebags over his shoulder. He embraced Parker quickly and then left.
They saddled his paint for him with his bedroll attached along with a bag of food. Word got around fast. He set his saddlebags on the horse and mounted up. He didn’t stop to take one last look; he couldn’t. His eyes misted as he rode away.
* * *
Iris set the bowls of stew on the table along with the cornbread and honey. Something had happened, but no one said anything to her. There were long faces everywhere. She’d been saving every penny she made, and she’d soon have enough to go North. Then it wouldn’t matter if no one wanted to share what was wrong.
Georgie and Parker sat down and waited for her. She took her seat and bowed her head, waiting for Parker to say grace.
“Lord, thank you for this food. Please watch over one of my dearest friends, Willis. He has a hard journey ahead. Help him please, Lord to find a measure of peace and happiness. Amen.”
Iris’ jaw dropped. “He left? He’s gone?”
Georgie nodded. “He couldn’t be here anymore. It happens when couples break up. Some people can get past it, but others can’t. He’ll be able to work his land and find a woman to love.”
Iris knew he was mad, but unhappy enough to leave the only family he had? She’d been so busy making sure no one got close to her, she hadn’t paid enough attention to what others felt. She’d stayed away from Lex. It hurt to see him and not talk to him.
“It’s because of me. I planned to leave in about a month. Is it too late to tell him so he’ll come back?” Her heart beat hard and fast.
Parker looked at her as though he was trying to read her thoughts. “He needs time alone. He never planned to love, but when he did, he was all in head first. Things happened that weren’t your fault. He wants to work his land. There’s a town not too far from there where I hope he’ll meet people.”
It’s what she wanted, right? So why did she feel as though she’d lost her best friend? It would have hurt more if he’d been courting her and left. She took a bite of her cornbread, and it tasted like sawdust. If he’d truly been courting her, he wouldn’t have left.
“If you’ll excuse me, I’ll clean up soon.” Iris ran upstairs to her room.
It had been two months since her almost execution. It had been very hard to stay away from Lex, but lately he’d hardly been around. She should have been relieved, but instead she had kept looking for him. She’d wanted to catch sight of him. She’d been selfish, and now he’d left alone. This was his home, not hers. She should have been the one to leave, not him. How was she supposed to feel or act? She’d hidden her true feelings for too long it seemed.
Tears flooded her eyes. She’d been such a fool. How many on the ranch blamed her? All, she imagined, and she didn’t blame them. It was time for her to leave. Maybe she could change her name and move to another town not too far away. She needed to figure something out fast.
Chapter Ten
Two weeks later
Iris finished her work in the hotel restaurant for the night. Her back and feet hurt, but she expected to get used to it. It was a sad goodbye at the Eastman Ranch, but she knew the people there blamed her for Lex leaving. They were too well mannered to say so, but she felt their anger all the same. She had confided in Georgie her plan to change her name and move to a different town in Texas.
