Something About a Sword and a Stone?

Something About a Sword and a Stone?

Jeffrey Wikstrom

Mythology / Arthurian / Fantasy

Join Uther Pendragon jerkass; his advisor Merlin, who's even worse; his knights Sir Ulfius and Sir Brastias, the Old Firm; and young Arthur, King of the Britons, and actually a pretty okay guy! This comic retelling of the first two books of Sir Thomas Malory's Le Morte D'Arthur also descibes Sir Balin and his weird quest to strike the Dolorous Blow and die tragically. It's a hoot and a half!DID YOU KNOW:Sir Balin, the knight who delivered the dolorous stroke, was so stupid half of Camelot assumed it was an act to cover for his witchcraft? Sir Gawaine was a whiny little brat who demanded unlimited special treatment on account of he was King Arthur’s nephew? Arthur only married Guinevere to get his hands on her dowry, the Round Table? Nobody liked Merlin because he was terrible?If you did know all those things, clearly you’ve read Le Morte d’Arthur by Sir Thomas Malory, and I pity you. No one should have to slog through that pile of continuity errors and insipid descriptions of jousts. I’ve spent years of my life poring over all twenty-one Books of this foundational work of fantasy literature, dreadful as it is. Here, for your amusement and edification, I recount, dissect, and ruthlessly mock each ridiculous plot contrivance, each self-contradictory anecdote, and each unnamed damsel who runs in from offscreen and dies.Arthur Dies at the End volume 1: Something About a Sword and a Stone? covers Books I through III of Le Morte d’Arthur. Here you’ll find King Arthur’s earliest days, from the hilarious and rape-filled account of his conception to the bit with the sword in the stone we all remember to his first war to his loveless wedding to Guinevere and his nephew Gawaine’s very first quest (he screws it up pretty bad)!ARTHUR DIES AT THE END: I read Le Morte d’Arthur so you don’t have to!
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Solomons Orbit

Solomon's Orbit

William Carroll

Classics / Mythology / Arthurian

Unlike some other reproductions of classic texts (1) We have not used OCR(Optical Character Recognition), as this leads to bad quality books with introduced typos. (2) In books where there are images such as portraits, maps, sketches etc We have endeavoured to keep the quality of these images, so they represent accurately the original artefact. Although occasionally there may be certain imperfections with these old texts, we feel they deserve to be made available for future generations to enjoy.
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The River Motor Boat Boys on the Mississippi; Or, On the Trail to the Gulf

The River Motor Boat Boys on the Mississippi; Or, On the Trail to the Gulf

Samuel E. Lowe

Mythology / Arthurian / Fantasy

Leopold is delighted to publish this classic book as part of our extensive Classic Library collection. Many of the books in our collection have been out of print for decades, and therefore have not been accessible to the general public. The aim of our publishing program is to facilitate rapid access to this vast reservoir of literature, and our view is that this is a significant literary work, which deserves to be brought back into print after many decades. The contents of the vast majority of titles in the Classic Library have been scanned from the original works. To ensure a high quality product, each title has been meticulously hand curated by our staff. This means that we have checked every single page in every title, making it highly unlikely that any material imperfections – such as poor picture quality, blurred or missing text - remain. When our staff observed such imperfections in the original work, these have either been repaired, or the title has been excluded from the Leopold Classic Library catalogue. As part of our on-going commitment to delivering value to the reader, within the book we have also provided you with a link to a website, where you may download a digital version of this work for free. Our philosophy has been guided by a desire to provide the reader with a book that is as close as possible to ownership of the original work. We hope that you will enjoy this wonderful classic work, and that for you it becomes an enriching experience. If you would like to learn more about the Leopold Classic Library collection please visit our website at www.leopoldclassiclibrary.com
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At Amberleaf Fair

At Amberleaf Fair

Phyllis Ann Karr

Mythology / Arthurian / Fantasy

They come to Amberleaf Fair—toymakers, storytellers, conjurers, and adventurers. They bring song and dance, gifts of love, and tales of far places. But in the midst of celebration, the high wizard Talmar is stricken with what appears to be the Choking Glory, his brother Torin the toymaker has been rejected by his lady love, and a fabulous necklace from across the sea has been stolen—and Torin is the chief suspect! This year Amberleaf Fair promises to be more than a place of marvels, a crossroads for magic, mysteries, and fabulous wealth. This year the fair promises to be much more interesting...and dangerous!
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The Bloody Herring

The Bloody Herring

Phyllis Ann Karr

Mythology / Arthurian / Fantasy

A Fantasy Historical Romance of the First Decade of Papa's Pride, by Clea Ortiz Newcome—but actually a Gilbert & Sullivan Fantasy in Space Opera Framework, by Phyllis Ann Karr!Some have told me that the events of Ship Years 8 and 9 were far too terrible to use as underpinning for a light fantasy romance, and one that in any case can appeal chiefly to the hundred or so avid Savoyards in the ship's population. My response is that light treatment has been among humanity's most effective defense mechanisms for dealing with disaster, probably since our race became recognizably human back in Old Earth's paleolithic; and that Savoy enthusiasm is as precious in Papa's Pride as any other artifact of our Old Earth heritage.In any case, these things lie more than half a century in our own past, and if half a century does not make them fair game for historical fantasy, what does? Is the past not the past, whether ten or ten thousand years ago, whether back on Old Earth or out...
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Frostflower and Thorn

Frostflower and Thorn

Phyllis Ann Karr

Mythology / Arthurian / Fantasy

The sorceress Frostflower could bring a babe from seed to term in the course of a winter's afternoon. The swordswoman Thorn could strew a field with corpses in a moment's battle rage. Outcasts, both of them. Hunted by the farmer-priests who ruled the wasteland that once had been a world. Then Thorn in her folly got pregnant. Flower, in her folly, wanted the child. And together, foolishly, they set out to survive...
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The Idylls of the Queen

The Idylls of the Queen

Phyllis Ann Karr

Mythology / Arthurian / Fantasy

The arrangements for the dinner party were overseen by Queen Quenevere herself. She selected the apples with her own hands. And before the evening ended, a young knight lay dead...and Arthur's beloved, unfaithful queen stood branded as a murderess and condemned to death!Phyllis Ann Karr has taken Celtic legend and given it a fresh new twist in this magical murder-mystery of knights and sorcery, romantic entanglements and courtly intrigues. This is a tale that explores the passions and motivations of the men and women who stride through the pages of Mallory's romance: Sir Kay, the sharp-tongued seneschal; Nimue, the elusive Lady of the Lake; Morgan le Fay, Merlin's complex nemesis; the tormented sons of Lot and Morgawse; and Mordred, Arthur's own bitter, terrified son!
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The Fanciers & Realizers MEGAPACK

The Fanciers & Realizers MEGAPACK

Phyllis Ann Karr

Mythology / Arthurian / Fantasy

The Fanciers & Realizers MEGAPACK® assembles Phyllis Ann Karr's complete series for the first time — 37 stories and novels, totalling more than 1700 pages of great Steampunk/alternate history reading! Included are:CAGEY WARRINGTON THURSDAYSOMETHING SHADY AT SUNVALE CLINICTHE CYCLOPS KILLERTHE REALIZERS/FANCIERS WORLDTHE STANDARD MURDER MYSTERYVARIETY'S NAMEROSEMARY LOZINSKI LESTRADETHE MONDAY AFTER MURDERWHO MOURNS FOR SILVERSTAIRS?THE BLUE THREAD KILLERMURDER WITH AN ARTIST'S RAGLOVE AND DEATH IN THE ASTEROID BELTHOUSE OF THE PENTAGRAMCORWIN AND ANGELATHE SPIDER: AN INCIDENT FROM THE BOYHOOD OF M. CORWIN POEA PREDICAMENT IN THE BELFRYTHE BREAKING POINTMAYDAY ON THE MELONAUTUMN LEAFTHE DREAMSTONETHE DREAMSTONE I: SOULS FOR TRADETHE DREAMSTONE II: LICENSED TO KILLTHE DREAMSTONE III: CURLING SNAKESHELLMOUTH PARKTHE PICKETS OF HELLMOUTHBLOOD GROTTOTHE HELLMOUTH SEVENCLEMENT CZARNYTHE...
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Frostflower and Windbourne (Frostflower & Thorn)

Frostflower and Windbourne (Frostflower & Thorn)

Phyllis Ann Karr

Mythology / Arthurian / Fantasy

The sorceress Frostflower has the power to guide the lightning through the air...and to leave her body to roam the Tanglelands. But her fellow traveller and fellow sorcerer Windbourne, blamed for the murder of a farmer-priest, carries a monstrous guilt that saps his powers and threatens their lives. Led by the valiant warrior Thorn, Frostflower and Windbourne begin the dangerous journey to Five Roads Crossing, where the mourning High Priestess lies in wait...
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All But a Pleasure

All But a Pleasure

Phyllis Ann Karr

Mythology / Arthurian / Fantasy

The four members of Dante's Delight Purgatorio do not consider what they do to be in any sense sado­masochistic. Of course, society at large takes a different view. And society at large includes Julie Whitcomb's new­met lover, Police Detective Dave Clayton, for whom she hopes to retire from purgatorial activity. Society at large also includes Angela Garvey, childhood sweetheart of the lad Julie hopes to mold into her Dante's Delight replacement, Corwin "Thesaurus Kid" Poe.When murdered bodies start turning up wearing the membership mark of Dante's Delight, it falls to Dave's immediate superior, Detective Sergeant Lestrade, to determine the guilt or innocence of the obvious prime suspects. And Rosemary Lestrade got into police work less to catch the guilty than to clear the innocent.
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