Skye Blue, page 30
part #6 of Firsts and Forever Series
12 oz. Kinky Liqueur (turns out that’s a real thing!)
2 oz. vodka
Splash of lemon-lime soda
Add Ice
Serve in a big-ass margarita glass with as many garnishes as you can possibly cram in there. You might think it can’t possibly all fit, but cram it in anyway. You’ll be glad you did!
Disclaimer: Don’t even THINK about drinking and driving after one of these! Safety first, y’all!
To go along with the contest, I put together the following bonus scene for my readers, in which Skye visits Nana on the set of her cable TV cooking show. Enjoy!
I squinted at the crew on the other side of the glaring lights, then tried not to look like a total cheeseball as I smiled at the camera. I’d never intentionally been on television before. Sure, there’d been that news footage of me go-go dancing beside a giant phallus as both it and I stuck out the sunroof of the Bonermobile, but this was way different.
Nana seemed right at home in front of the camera, though. They’d started filming a couple minutes ago, and she was off on some tangent about Pasta Puttanesca. It was news to me that translated from Italian, it meant ‘pasta a la whore.’ This show was quite educational, actually.
I was pretty sure she’d forgotten I was standing beside her until she whirled on me suddenly and said, “So, Skye, you were going to tell us about your Big Fucking Cock.”
“I – wait, what?”
“That cocktail you like so much! The one you got at that cafe. We won’t say where it’s from, on account of we’re going to try to copy their recipe and maybe they would take offense to that. But I take offense at the fact that they charge twenty-five bucks for one drink!”
“It’s a big drink, though.”
“I know it’s big! That’s right there in the title! What, you think I wasn’t paying attention? Now look here.” She shoved her huge, round glasses on her face and gestured at the dozens of bottles of liquor cluttering the counter in front of us. “This is what we got to work with. I went down to this cafe and ordered me one of these Big Fucking Cocks just so I could get a taste of it. I have an idea what we’re shooting for, so now all we gotta do is recreate it!”
“Okay.”
Nana hoisted an absolutely huge glass up onto the countertop. The thing could have served as an aquarium for a manatee. She then picked up a bottle of vodka and poured about half of it into the glass. “I figure everything’s better with vodka, so let’s start there. What do you think we should do next?”
“I’m not sure, but it needs to be fruity.”
She tossed a couple strawberries into the glass. They floated to the surface. “Fruity. Check! What’s this stuff?” She pulled the top off a square bottle and took a big swig. “I don’t know what it is, but I like it.” Nana poured half of that bottle into the glass, too. I couldn’t see the label, but I was pretty sure it was tequila.
“We need to turn it pink somehow,” I reminded her. She looked around the counter before picking up a bottle of grenadine and adding about a teaspoon to her concoction.
Next she grabbed some sort of liqueur and took another big swig, then smacked her lips together a few times before saying, “Nah.” She sampled three more bottles, and as she was doing that, she picked up the bottle of vodka with her free hand and poured the rest of it into the glass.
She paused to assess her creation for a moment, then randomly grabbed two bottles off the counter and filled the glass almost to the rim. After that, she added another tiny dash of grenadine. “I gotta be honest,” she said. “I usually let other people do the bartending. This looks pretty good, though. All we gotta do is doll it up like they do at that cafe.” She drove a pineapple wedge onto the rim of the glass, then tossed in a handful of plastic monkeys. They bobbed to the surface like shipwreck survivors.
“Festive,” I said with a grin. By now, I’d all but forgotten that the camera was rolling. I was having too much fun watching Nana.
“Oh, I’m not done. I know this drink is all about the sexy bits. I gotta tell you though, I searched everywhere for a straw that looked like a big weenie dongle, and I couldn’t find one. So I needed to improvise. I’m good at that. I bought us some regular straws,” she dropped a couple into the glass, “and this.” She pulled a big, pink, far too realistic-looking dildo out from under the counter and plunked it into the drink, where it landed with a big splash.
I burst out laughing as her director, who’d been remarkably stoic throughout all of this, finally threw his hands up and yelled, “Oh for the love of God, cut!”
###
Thank you for reading!
For more by Alexa Land, please visit
http://alexalandwrites.blogspot.com/
Books by Alexa Land Include:
Feral
Tinder (The Tinder Chronicles, Book One)
Hunted (The Tinder Chronicles, Book Two)
(The Third Book in The Tinder Chronicles will be Available in Late 2014)
And the Firsts and Forever Series:
Way Off Plan
All In
In Pieces
Gathering Storm
Salvation
Skye Blue
The series will continue in early 2015
Table of Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Epilogue
Bonus Scene
About the Author
Alexa Land, Skye Blue
