Rebel (Royal Bastards MC: Sacramento Book 4), page 6
“Then who the hells door am I supposed to lay it at?” It all came back to Barracuda.
“Menace,” Playboy thundered. “Menace is the one who needs to pay for this. There are two people this all comes back to, and Menace is the one who needs to pay for it. You need to get your ass back into the club and help us take this guy down. If after that, you still don’t want anything to do with the Bastards, then walk away. None of us will stop you. You at least owe that much to Tank.”
I closed my eyes and shook my head.
“Playboy,” Raelyn called softly.
“My woman maybe heartbroken, but I’m not going to rest until the guy who made her that way is dead.” He clapped me on the shoulder, and I opened my eyes. “Grieve Tank, Rebel. No one is telling you not to, but there is no reason why you have to do it alone. We all feel the same way you do, and we’re all here for each other.”
Raelyn reached Playboy’s side, and she slipped her hand into his. “Take me home, Playboy,” she whispered. Her cheeks were stained with tears, and her voice wobbled.
Playboy sighed and tucked Raelyn to his side. “Think about what I said, Rebel. You don’t have to be alone.” He led Raelyn back to his bike and helped her on.
I watched the way he handled her. There was so much love between the two of them that it almost felt wrong of me to watch them together.
That was something all of us were chasing, even if we didn’t know it. Raelyn may have been heartbroken, but Playboy was going to be there to be the one to help put the pieces back together.
They roared out of the cemetery and headed in the direction of the clubhouse. The place that should be my home, but it didn’t feel like it anymore.
I turned and sat with my back to Tank’s grave.
Life was moving on, but I didn’t know how to move with it.
*
Chapter Thirteen
Prudence
Beer delivery…
I stood in the middle of my kitchen and looked around.
His bike was in my driveway, but I couldn’t find Rebel anywhere. So, he wasn’t here, but he really couldn’t have gotten too far without his bike.
I had been home for an hour, but there still wasn’t any sign of Rebel. I ran my fingers through my hair and sighed. How could I be worried about a man I didn’t really know, but it felt like I knew him?
Dear, Lord.
I tried to think of all of the places he could have gone. He could have had one of his friends pick him up. He could have walked to the store or bar. Hell, he could be anywhere.
And why did I care so much?
I couldn’t just sit around and wait for him. There was one place near-by that he could be. A place I had asked him about, questioned why he was there, and he wouldn’t tell me.
The cemetery.
After I put on my coat, I grabbed two beers from the fridge and headed out for the cemetery. The thing was, it wasn’t a small cemetery, and I had never really been here before. Of course, I had driven by it many times, but I had never crossed through the gates.
This was another instance of your day changing in the blink of an eye. I was wandering through the cemetery with two beers and no real idea of where I was going. Hell, Rebel might not even be here.
Lord have mercy, how did I get myself into this? I should have just stayed home and waited to see if Rebel came back. Any sane woman would have done that.
I obviously wasn’t sane.
A main road ran the length of the cemetery, and rows upon rows of gravestones lined each side.
The sun was setting, and I hugged my arms around my middle. I slowly walked up the road, looking up and down each row as I went.
Ten rows later, I saw him.
Rebel was leaned up against a grave with his head tipped back and his eyes closed. I could feel the pain and sadness radiating around him. I didn’t know whose grave it was, but this was why Rebel seemed so lost.
I stepped off the road onto the grass between the graves and his head shot up.
I halted in my steps and held my breath.
This could go two ways. Rebel was either going to tell me to get lost, or he was going to drink a beer with me. In the cemetery.
“Uh, hey,” I called. I didn’t know what else to say. I thought you were going to be at my house when I got home, and you weren’t so instead of just waiting for you I decided to grab some booze and head to the cemetery. Again, I was obviously not sane.
“You normally go for a walk in the cemetery with two beers?” he called.
That was a good sign. He didn’t seem mad to see me. I held up the beers. “Uh, well, not normally, but it seemed like the thing to do right now. I have an extra, if you want one.”
“You’re not double-fisting it tonight?” he laughed.
I shook my head. “Um, no.” I walked over to him and held out the beer to him. “And I also forgot to bring a bottle opener.” My walk in the cemetery with two beers wasn’t exactly well thought out.
Rebel chuckled and turned slightly. He pressed the cap of the beer to the hard stone of the grave behind him and knocked off the cap. He held it to me and reached for the other one, then repeated the process before leaning against the grave and taking a drink of the beer.
“That was pretty impressive,” I laughed.
“As long as you got a hard surface around, you can easily open a beer.” He shook his head and smiled sadly. “And I know that Tank wouldn’t mind helping me out.”
I looked at the headstone behind him.
Thomas ‘Tank’ Reynolds
Beloved son and brother.
12/02/1990 – 09/13/2021
Barely two months.
The insignia of the Royal Bastards sat etched in the stone beneath the date.
“He was your friend?” I asked softly.
Rebel scoffed and closed his eyes. “You could say that.”
I knew members of an MC were family. They crossed the line of friendship and became brothers.
He bit his lip between his teeth and shook his head back and forth.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.
“You’re not the one who should be sorry.” He leaned his head back and tears escaped his closed eyes.
My heart broke right then and there.
“Rebel,” I whispered. His grief was overwhelming, and I didn’t know how to help him, but I wanted to try to.
“You should go back home, babe.”
I wasn’t going to leave him. If all he wanted to do was sit here and cry, I was going to stay. “Is it okay if I sit next to you?” I didn’t know the person Rebel was grieving, but I wanted to be there for him.
His eyes opened. “Pru,” he croaked.
He wasn’t going to ask me to stay. He thought he didn’t need anyone, but he was wrong. This was a time he absolutely needed someone. That someone was going to be me.
I parked my ass next to his and leaned into him. “Not going anywhere, Rebel.”
He dropped his chin to his chest and sighed.
“Do you want to talk?” I asked softly.
He shook his head.
“Okay.”
I stayed still, just trying to give him my strength. I wanted to give him anything he needed.
“It’s hard to breath sometimes, Pru. Just knowing he’s not here anymore and I am, is enough to knock me off my feet.” His words were raw and unfiltered.
I leaned to the side and put my arm around his shoulders. “He was your brother.”
Rebel nodded. “He was. He was the one guy in the club I trusted blindly.”
“And I’m sure he felt the same about you.” I could feel how much Rebel had loved Tank, and even though I didn’t know Tank before he died, I was one hundred percent positive he felt the same way. Friendship like that was something most people never got to know or feel.
“He was my brother,” Rebel gasped. A sobbed ripped from his lips, and he scrunched his face. “I don’t want to live without him, Pru. Why did it have to be him?”
I turned my body into him and wrapped my arms around his neck. The words “it’s okay” were on the tip of my tongue. I held them back because even though things were hopefully eventually going to be okay for Rebel, the words weren’t going to help him right now.
He was in the middle of grieving, and I wasn’t going to take that away from him.
Rebel wrapped his arms around my waist and hauled me into his lap. I planted my knees on either side of his hips, and he buried his face in my neck. He squeezed me tightly and sobbed. I tightened my arms around his neck and just held him.
Words weren’t what he needed right now.
Tears stung my eyes, and a lone tear rolled down my cheek.
I would be there for Rebel for however long he needed me. I wasn’t going anywhere.
*
Chapter Fourteen
Rebel
Hop on…
My tears had dried, and the sobbing had passed.
So many times before, I had sat right here and cried, asking God why it had to be Tank. But I had never done it with someone else to witness it.
My guilt was so immense over being alive and Tank being in the ground. I didn’t know how to explain it to anyone, so all I could ever do was cry.
Pru had been there for me.
She didn’t try to tell me to suck it up, or that things would be fine. She just let me talk when I wanted and held me when I didn’t have anything to say.
“We better get out of here before the groundskeeper calls the cops on us,” I grunted.
“Pftt,” Pru scoffed. “We’re staying here however long you want to, Rebel.” She sighed and ran her fingers through my hair. “I’ll tell that groundskeeper to go fly a kite.” I felt her smile. “Or go dig a hole.”
“Babe,” I chuckled. “I’m ready to go.”
She leaned back and looked down at me. “You sure?”
I nodded and brushed her hair from her face. “I think I’ve embarrassed myself enough for today.”
She rolled her eyes and laid her hand on my chest. “I hope you don’t think you embarrassed yourself in front of me. If you stick around, I’m sure there will be nights the ASPCA commercial comes on and I will openly bawl my eyes out over puppies and kitties I don’t even know. Just wait.”
“I’ll make sure to change the channel if I see it.”
She laughed lightly. “My hero.” She reached up and stroked her hand down my cheek. “We don’t have to go anywhere, Rebel. We can stay right here.”
I turned my head and pressed a kiss to the pad of her thumb. “I’m good, babe. It had been too long since I came by to see Tank.”
And I was good. Better than I had felt in weeks. Something had shifted inside me.
Before Pru had appeared like an angel, I had been thinking about what Playboy had said.
I needed to get off my ass and avenge Tank’s death. Without a doubt, I knew that Tank would have been doing everything he could if we had switched places. I was never going to get over losing my best friend, but I had to keep living.
“If you’re sure,” she whispered. Her eyes connected with mine, and she smiled shyly. “My knees are frozen, so it’ll be nice to get up.”
“What?” I wrapped my arms around Pru and lifted her as I stood. “What the hell, Pru? Why didn’t you tell me your knees were getting wet?”
She stepped back from me and reached down to brush the grass off her knees. “Because my wet knees didn’t seem important at the time.” She stood straight. “And I figured if my knees were getting wet, so was your ass.”
“My ass is dry as a bone, babe,” I laughed.
“What the hell?” she chuckled. “I’m going to need to talk to the groundskeeper,” she muttered.
I shook my head and grabbed our beers off the ground. Neither of us had taken more than a sip. I turned my back to Pru. “Hop on.”
“Hop on?” she asked.
“You’re not walking home with wet pants. I’ll carry you since I’m the reason it even happened.” I glanced over my shoulder at her. “Hop on.”
“I’m not getting on your back, Rebel. I’m a big girl and I can walk home, even if my pants are wet.”
“You either hop on, or I’m going to lift you up and carry you home like a baby,” I warned.
Pru pointed her finger at me. “No, you won’t.”
“Try me,” I laughed.
She rolled her eyes. “You don’t have to carry me, Rebel.”
“I know, Pru. Now, hop on.”
Pru threw up her hands and laughed. “Whatever. You’re the one who is going to have a sore back tomorrow.”
She stepped toward me and laid her hands on my shoulders. I crouched down, and she jumped up. I quickly handed her the beers and then her legs wrapped around my waist, and my hands wrapped behind me to hold her butt.
“You good?” I asked.
“I am, but I have to tell you that this is complete overkill for wet knees.”
I chuckled and turned toward her house. “It’s the least I can do after you let me cry all over you.”
She sighed and leaned her head down next to mine. “I’ll always be here for you, Rebel. Even if you don’t have anything to say.”
I didn’t know how it had happened, but Pru had come into my life just when I needed her. If she hadn’t been there for me today, I don’t know what would have happened. She was a ray of sunshine that I didn’t know I needed.
All I knew now was the past sucked, and I would never get over losing Tank. But I had to keep living.
I still felt the club had let me down, but what had happened was something that none of us could have seen coming, not even Barracuda.
Life was moving on, and I needed to get moving with it.
Menace was going to the ground. I wasn’t going to rest until it happened.
And Prudence was going to be mine.
*
Chapter Fifteen
Prudence
What in the…
I hadn’t been carried since I was three years old, and I vividly remembered Mom putting me on the ground and telling me I was a big girl who didn’t need to be carried.
Now, I was thirty-one years old, and Rebel was carrying me on his back like I weighed nothing. Talk about a boost for a girl’s ego. “You’re sure I’m not hurting you?”
Rebel chuckled and climbed the porch steps. “Babe, I’m fine.” He reached for the door handle and pushed it open. “You didn’t lock the door when you left?”
He ducked into the house and crouched to set me down.
I brushed my hands down my shirt. “Uh, I was kind of preoccupied trying to figure out where you were.”
“Lock the door. Don’t matter if you’re just leaving for a minute. Lock the door.”
I rolled my eyes. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll do better next time.” I walked into the kitchen and dropped our empty bottles in the garbage. “Did you want another beer?” I asked.
“I think you mean do I want my first beer. You were the one who drank the last two.”
I flitted my hand in the air and opened the fridge. “You had some of yours,” I muttered. It wasn’t that long of a walk back from the cemetery, but I got thirsty. And I happened to have two beers in my hand. Win, win.
“Babe,” Rebel drawled.
I grabbed two more beers and handed him one. “Catch up.”
“You keep giving me beers that I need to open.” He grabbed the bottle opener off the fridge and popped the top. “Give me yours.” He opened mine and handed it back. “You got plans for dinner?”
“Tator tot casserole?” I suggested.
“Does that go with beer?”
I shrugged and opened the freezer. “Doesn’t beer go with everything?”
He laughed and leaned against the counter. “Slow down, babe, I already think you’re the woman of my dreams. Keep talking like that and we’ll skip straight to dessert.”
I closed my eyes and stuck my head in the freezer. I mouthed “Oh, my God” silently to the ice cream and Cool Whip. Woman of his dreams? Holy crap. “I think I need to check the garage freezer for tator tots,” I muttered.
Rebel chuckled and moved next to me. He laid his hand on my hip and squeezed. “I’ll go check, babe.”
I didn’t pull my head out of the freezer until I heard the garage door open, and his footsteps fade down the stairs. Then I slammed the freezer shut and fanned my face with my hand.
I liked Rebel. Like, I liked Rebel. I was more than willing to be that woman of his dreams, but I was absolutely terrified that I wasn’t what he thought I was. He was going through some heavy stuff losing his best friend and possibly his club. Changes were afoot for him, and maybe I was just a stop along the way.
“Pru,” he called.
I closed my eyes, and I placed a hand on the counter to steady myself. “Uh, yeah?”
My garage was a mess, and he probably couldn’t even find the freezer.
“Come out here.”
“Coming.” I stepped through the door to the garage and went down the three steps. “What’s wrong?”
Rebel had his back to me, and he was looking down at a something on the floor. “How often do you come out here?”
I cringed and tried to think. “Uh, probably a couple of weeks ago. This place is more of storage for me.” I moved next to Rebel and looked down a pile of clothes at his feet. “Why is my underwear out here?”
“These are yours?” he asked.
I crouched down and grabbed my favorite pair of white boy shorts with yellow daisies on them. “I literally wore these two days ago. Yes, they are mine.”
“Is this where you normally leave them?”
I looked up at Rebel and rolled my eyes. “That would be a negative.” I sifted through the rest of the pile and frowned. “This is the dirty laundry from my bedroom.”
Rebel moved to the service door of the garage and pulled it open. “Please tell me you normally have this locked.”
I darted my gaze to the side. “Uh, well…”
Rebel growled and stepped out to look outside. “You’re killing me here, Pru.”
