Cold Silence, page 20
She concentrated on catching a string of melted cheese. She hated talking about herself. People always pushed for a little bit more and a little bit more after that until they had everything and she had nothing but a need to run and hide. “I’ve had roommates in the past but I didn’t particularly enjoy the experience. And, yes, I’ve always been quiet.” She grimaced. “Unless I’ve had too much to drink and then, apparently, I don’t shut up.”
His eyes shone with amusement. “That would be something to see.”
Except she never had too much to drink nowadays. Not since she’d been young and foolish and had given away her secrets to a boy she’d mistakenly thought would keep them. She gave Shane a smile she hoped didn’t reveal her bitterness. “No, it isn’t. Really.”
“According to my sister I started talking early and never shut up. I think that was written in every report card I ever received. But by the time I joined the Army I finally learned the value of keeping my mouth closed. Scotty always says—” He cut himself off, clearly suffering from raw and terrible grief every time he forgot his friend was gone.
It was devasting to watch.
She needed to stop feeling sorry for herself and her own pathetic hurts. People were dying. She slipped off the stool and went to him. Touched his arm.
“I’m so sorry about your friend.” She withdrew her hand and snuggled deeper into the hoodie. “I know I said it before, but I mean it. I know finding this killer is personal to you. I know why. I promise I’ll do everything I can to track him down.”
“I keep forgetting Scotty is dead,” Shane admitted. “I find myself about to text him or think of a joke to share.” He turned sideways. “Sometimes I want to tell him how much I enjoy working with you and how smart you are.” His voice got deeper. “How beautiful you are.”
Her mouth opened in surprise and she looked away.
“And how you don’t like anyone noticing the latter.” He stood in front of her and her nerves fluttered.
He dipped his head and kissed her. She stood there, desperate to kiss him back like she had yesterday, but…
He pulled away, his eyes dark and intense. “What’s wrong?”
She went with honesty. “Yesterday, afterwards, you said you shouldn’t have kissed me.”
His lips tugged into a rueful smile. “I was trying to do the right thing.” He brushed her hair that must have once again escaped its constraints, back behind her ear. “Now I can’t even remember why this might be the wrong thing to do.”
She didn’t either. She rose up on tiptoes, her breasts pressed against his chest as she kissed his mouth. She ran her fingers through his hair, grazing her nails over his scalp.
He pulled her against him and she felt edgy and nervous knowing she wanted him in her bed but worried it wouldn’t be worth the fallout.
He pushed aside the pizza box, lifted her up onto the kitchen island despite his cast and stood between her legs. His fingers seemed to quiver as they tightened on her hip and shifted her forward. He slowly unzipped the hoodie and it slipped easily off her shoulders.
She kissed him again, not wanting to think about why they were together or what would happen if it all went wrong. It had been a long time since she’d desired intimacy and now she’d tasted him she couldn’t stop craving him. He tasted of musk and pine and warm male skin after a cold day in the sun.
Her fingers ran over his back and she nibbled his lower lip which made him groan and pull her against him.
Heat bloomed over her skin making her hands tremble.
His fingers went to the buttons of her pajama top and he started undoing them one at a time until they were all undone. He slowly swept one edge of the material to one side, then the other, his eyes going wide with appreciation at her breasts. Her nipples were tight with arousal. He shifted lower to take one pink tip in his mouth and she moaned.
The sensations he created made her shudder with desire.
She tugged on his t-shirt and helped ease it over his plaster cast before he trailed his lips over her collarbone and up the tender skin of her throat.
She’d never been with anyone this muscular or toned before and knew he must put hours into honing his body into a weapon of sorts. She was grateful he didn’t seem to mind her softer curves because her spin classes and yoga couldn’t hope to compete.
But she liked her body. Liked her curves. She loved the feel of his hands gripping her hips possessively, the sensation of his mouth on her skin, and the heat in his eyes as he discovered her.
His tongue circled her nipple until she was squirming and he let go of her hip to touch her body as if all he wanted to do was arouse her until she burned. Then he pushed her gently back and she rested on her elbows, watching him.
His fingers hooked onto her pajama bottoms. “Lift.”
“Say please.” Her voice didn’t wobble for which she was glad.
“Please.” He grinned and slowly dragged the soft cotton down her legs. Next thing she knew she was wearing nothing except a thong.
Thankfully the drapes were closed and the lights were dimmed because Yael was not nor had any desire to be an exhibitionist and the idea of stopping this terrified her. She was reserved and slow to trust but somehow, she trusted this guy. Enough to have sex with him anyway. She couldn’t imagine him wanting to stick around once the case was over. This might be her one chance to physically enjoy this man.
His gaze was so intense she bit her lip. He kissed her stomach. Then the tattoo of a raven on her hip and the other one of a snake on the inside of her wrist. “I like these.”
Of course, he did.
He traced his tongue lower, over her hip bone and she tensed knowing where he was going and wanting him there but being nervous too. She thought about her vibrator upstairs. It had plenty of plus points but had never gone down on her on the kitchen counter—which happened to be a fantasy she’d believed would remain mysterious and unfulfilled.
He draped her legs over his shoulders and dipped his tongue along the side of her barely there panties.
She shot up.
He laughed. “Relax. I want to make you feel good.”
What she was feeling wasn’t good. It was a mix of clawing desire and desperate want. It left good in the dust, along with dry white wine and potato chips. This felt like diamonds and fairy dust. Like castles and dreamscapes. It felt incredible.
His short hair gleamed and the stubble of his jaw scraped her skin in a way that made her toes curl. Her eyes closed and her mouth opened on a soft gasp. He licked and kissed until she lay prone against the cold marble feeling nothing except the slow drag of his tongue over her most sensitive flesh, wanting nothing except for it to last forever even as she wanted more of him. All of him.
His fingers sank inside her and the need built higher and higher, sensation coiling like a spring. She wrapped one leg around his neck knowing she was speeding toward climax faster than she’d ever gotten there before.
He ignored her not so subtle urging and took his time.
“Shane.” She didn’t beg. She didn’t remember ever wanting this desperately in the past. Sex was usually fast fumbles in the dark with people she planned to never see again. Right now, she wanted this man inside her more than she’d ever wanted anything in her entire adult life.
His tongue pressed flat against her clit and her world exploded into a million pieces of light that shattered and sparkled. A shudder of pleasure ripped through her as she cried out.
He lay his rough cheek against her stomach as she slowly spun back to earth.
She squeezed him with her legs and stroked his short hair. “Shane.”
“Just give me a moment. I’m trying to be a gentleman about this. You’ve had a tough day and not a lot of sleep recently. I’m looking for the strength to walk away without doing something you might regret tomorrow.”
Her heart gave a little flutter. A warning shot across the bow. This man had lost so much and right now he needed her as much as she needed him.
“I don’t plan to regret anything,” she said gruffly. “Not after the last few weeks. Life’s too short.”
He tensed at her words and she thought he was going to pull away again.
18
People didn’t live forever and wasting opportunities like this topped the stupid list. Yael’s words reminded him he’d lost two people he cared about in the last two weeks.
And, if he was honest with himself, he’d never been as desperate to get inside someone as he was to get inside Yael right now. Making her come had made him dizzy with lust. She’d turned him on with her mix of insecurity and wanton enjoyment. Despite everything, she’d trusted him to make her feel good. To get her to that place they both wanted to go.
A lot of the women he’d dated lately treated sex like a series of expected choreographed moves that they’d read in a magazine or seen in a TV show. More than one had asked him to handcuff her to the bedposts, which he could deal with as long as they had their own fluffy cuffs and didn’t expect to use his.
Nothing seemed choreographed or planned with this woman. She’d obviously assumed that coming downstairs in her plaid pajamas would be some kind of turn off, but apparently, he had some sort of previously unknown LL Bean fetish.
They worked together but they were not coworkers.
A relationship wasn’t against any rules.
Soon he’d be going back to the team and he’d probably lose the opportunity to be with this woman—and he didn’t like that thought.
She intrigued him.
And if he was being a little disingenuous about why he’d attached himself to her in the first place? His concerns had proven unfounded and he knew they were on the same page about catching this killer. And he certainly wasn’t faking his attraction for her. He was so hard even his head hurt. And she knew he wasn’t interested in anything long term.
She took the matter out of his hands by sliding off the counter and wrapping her pajama top tight around herself. Disappointment flashed through him for a moment, before she grabbed his good hand and tugged him to follow her up the stairs to her bedroom. He went willingly.
Her bed had a purple satin duvet and mauve sheets. There was a large cream armchair in one corner with a reading lamp and an ereader on a small side table. She went over to the drapes to close a narrow gap in the material.
He followed her across the room and when she turned around, he stopped her, pressed her up against the covered glass and kissed her deeply.
She obviously had no idea what she did to him with her little tattoos and the totally unexpected red fucking thong. She was like his favorite Christmas gift and he wanted to unwrap her over and over again.
She sank her fingers into his hair and he hoisted her higher until her legs were around his hips.
“Your arm,” she protested.
“Is fine.” He turned them toward the bed and came down on top of her. The room was dark except for the light from the hallway which was more than enough to see the heat in her gaze. He pulled back and removed his SIG and Glock from their holsters and placed them on the nightstand.
She struggled to sit up and opened the drawer. He placed both weapons out of sight and she relaxed back onto the covers again.
He tossed his wallet on the table, grateful he always carried condoms for survival purposes and also because sometimes men were weak when it came to the opportunity to get naked and lucky. As she’d said, occasionally his job was lonely as fuck.
It had been a long time for him.
He’d been caught up with work and avoiding anything that smelled even vaguely like commitment.
But, really, no one lived forever and Grace’s tears were proof of that.
Emotion clogged his throat and he didn’t want to think about his dead friend. He wanted to think about nothing except burying himself inside this woman with her beautiful brown eyes full of shadows and secrets.
Yael’s gaze followed the movement of his hands as he slowly unbuckled his belt and stripped off his boots and pants.
The appreciation in her gaze almost made him blush, but he was more interested in her body. She had the most mouth-watering curves that he wanted to spend all night exploring.
He sank down onto the bed and felt the mattress give. He kissed her mouth and she released a sigh. Then he moved lower, careful not to catch her with the rough edge of the cast on his left arm.
His broken bones ached a little. Enough to remind him he probably needed to take a little more care of his injury, but not for the next hour or so.
She reached out and ran her hands over his chest and shoulders. “You must work out every day.”
“Pretty much. It’s part of the job.”
Her skin was pale but her cheeks were flushed and her eyes were wide as she took him in. The fact she liked his body almost made the brutal workouts worth it. Not so much the gym—but the assault courses and close quarters combat and climbing and general dangling on a rope from a helicopter wearing fifty pounds of gear. That was the incentive to maintain his upper body strength. It was also the main reason Novak had pulled him off the team.
The team was the last thing on his mind right now.
Yael’s fingers left a trail of arousal in their wake until every inch of him was on fire. She wrapped her hand around him and sweat burst from his pores.
He caught her wrist. “Wait.”
Her brows rose in surprise.
“I want to make you feel good,” he said.
“I already feel good.” She laughed and the low sound sent a ripple of something that felt a lot like tenderness through him.
He moved so he lay alongside her. “Again.”
“Again?” She sounded dubious.
He kissed her mouth. “Again.”
He reached up and released her hair. Spread the black mass over the pillow. He nuzzled her neck. “You always smell incredible.”
He felt her smile. Why that made him feel good he didn’t know. She was wary of men and he figured some of her experiences hadn’t been great. He wanted to replace those memories with something good. Keep up HRT’s reputation for excellence.
She stroked her hands over his shoulders and pecs. He made his way down her body tasting every inch and finally removing that last tiny scrap of clothing. Her legs were long and her toenails were painted a soft pink that he’d never have predicted.
He tasted her breasts again, unable to resist.
Her fingers dug into his scalp impatiently. “Do you have a condom?”
He couldn’t wait either. He winced as he moved up the bed to grab one out of his wallet.
Yael caught his look of pain and her expression sobered. “Are you okay?”
Leaning on his good arm he found the condom, tore it open with his teeth and she helped him quickly put it on. He was better than okay. He was sublime.
He moved between her legs and she guided him to her. She wrapped one knee around his thigh and he pushed inside.
She gasped and his heart hammered as they held each other’s gaze for a wondrous hot moment.
He moved, then pushed against her again, and again. She clung to him so tightly and they fit together so perfectly he couldn’t think straight. It was exquisite torture as he moved faster and faster and she matched him, her fingers digging sharply into the channel of his spine and then lower as she grabbed his ass which would have made him smile if he hadn’t been so focused on her.
They strained against one another, over and over until finally she arched up off the bed and closed her eyes as she cried out.
But his own control slipped and he thrust home one more time as his climax rocketed through his entire body searing his brain in a white haze of pleasure.
When he could breathe again, he realized he’d collapsed on her and she probably couldn’t breathe. He shifted his weight and her arms tightened briefly before letting go.
He climbed out of bed and went to the bathroom, getting rid of the condom.
When he came back Yael was curled up under the covers watching him with big eyes.
“Want me to sleep in the other room?” he asked softly.
She shook her head.
That was all the permission he needed.
He flicked off the hall light and climbed into bed. Lay on his back because of his stupid cast and pulled her against him. She was warm. Her cheek rested on his chest, her leg hooked over his thigh. Her skin was soft as velvet and blew his mind.
That had been spectacular sex. He wondered if she’d enjoyed it as much as he had or if he’d added to her list of disappointments.
His good arm tightened around her and she snuggled closer, her scent filling his senses. He felt her pulse slow and her breath deepen. He drifted off slowly, wanting round two but knowing they both needed sleep.
Yael slipped from beneath the covers and used the bathroom. That had been the most incredible sex of her life but she had no intention of mentioning that to Shane. She suspected sex was always like that for him. Energetic, sweaty, intense—with women, as he’d pointed out in one of their first conversations, always wanting more from him than he was willing to give. She’d known he’d ruin her for anyone else but she hadn’t known how deeply being with him would affect her. How desperately she’d want more of him…
Pathetic.
Just as predicted.
She didn’t want to wake him so she grabbed her pajama top off the floor and crept downstairs to put away the pizza and set up that internet search for the convicted felon, which she’d meant to do before falling asleep.
It wasn’t what she wanted to do. What she wanted to do was have another unforgettable round of sex with Shane Livingstone but she didn’t want to come across as too clingy or demanding. She didn’t want to assume anything more than them having a one-off sexual escapade, otherwise she risked setting herself up for disappointment.
They still had to work together and she didn’t want her emotions trashed.
She glanced at the clock on the stove. Three a.m. She shivered and stuffed the pizza box into her refrigerator. Then she dragged her laptop onto the counter and plugged it in, turning it on and quickly setting up the web crawler searches she’d meant to initiate earlier.
