Flood, page 48
Damn butterflies.
“Um, how’s football?”
His eyes instantly light up like a proud dad talking about his only son.
“Everyone is saying we have the best shot at the Super Bowl than we have in decades. It feels incredible, really. The rush.” He slicks his hands over his hair. A smile hangs on my face. I love how happy he looks.
“I have to stay really focused. My whole team is counting on me. It's like switching everything off in the world and focusing on that one thing. I feel good, though. Just staying focused. Eating, breathing, sleeping football. Training. Thinking about you.”
Guilt surfaces majorly.
I bite my lower lip.
I really want to tell him I’m pregnant, that I’ve read his letter, that I’m an emotional basket case with my feelings floating everywhere. Maybe I should hang up the basket on a later shelf until his season is over. Surely he would forgive me for thinking of him first?
“I know you’re against the sport, Willow, but I’ll win it for you.”
“What?” I’m shocked.
“I’ll win a ring. But when I do carry my team to the Super Bowl, promise me you’ll come?”
I’m doing the math in my head. I’ll be six months pregnant. God, how do you dress a bump for an event like that? Imagine that surprise!
“Okay. I promise,” I quietly agree, a thousand scenes running through my mind of how crazy of a moment that would be for him.
“Willow, what happened in Capri with us, it wasn’t just sex. It was more than that. You have to know that.”
“I know that.”
“And you read my letter?”
I nod my head slowly. If I speak anymore, I know I’m going to spill the baby news. And I just can’t put that responsibility on him. He’d lose his focus. I know it. And I know this means the world to him.
Whatever happens with us, he is this baby’s father. I know he would want to make her proud.
“You make me want to be a better person, Willow. I mean that.”
“Thank you,” I barely say. I’m fighting back tears. I want to tell him everything right now. I want to run into his arms, let myself feel every single thing I’ve been holding back for so long, but now is not the timing. I have to show some restraint, some discipline, for his dream’s sake, for his team’s sake, heck, for every Dallas Derricks fan’s dream’s sake.
I exhale that large pressure. What a tall order.
“Pack your bags, get your outfits ready, I’m taking my team to the Super Bowl, baby. Mark my words.”
* * *
LUCA
* * *
I walk her to the foot of the elevators and shove my hands in my pocket. “Look, I’m going to watch you get in those elevators and stay put. I don’t trust myself being anywhere with you alone where there’s a bed. You’ve been through a lot today. I don’t want to confuse you. I just wanted to see you again. To make you feel special. To show you how I care for you. You do know this, right? I care for you?”
She nods slowly, with fresh tears in her eyes. I want to kiss her. God, I want to kiss those tears away. But if I do, I won’t stop. I won’t be able to stop.
“Willow, I say this with everything in me and I mean it. I’m going to bring my team to the Super Bowl. And every practice when it’s hard, when I’m tired, I’m going to pretend I’m throwing for you because Willow, will you be there when I win? Will you trust me again and be my real prize?”
“I guess you’ll have to win to find out, Luca.” Her soft lips graze lightly across my cheek as she turns around and heads into the elevator. I know she’s enticing me on purpose. Clever motivation tactic. It’s already working.
“Oh and Luca.…” She turns around. “You can write me. I like letters. I really do.”
Chapter 23
LUCA
* * *
It’s the moment I’ve lived for my entire life. It’s the moment I’ve devoted my entire career for. I’ve dreamt of this moment, I’ve visualized what it would feel like, but nothing could ever have prepared me for the emotions that come rushing in as the lights on the clock descend down from 3…2…1….
“And the Dallas Derricks have won the Super Bowl! Luca Medici has thrown the game of his life!”
I hear the announcer in my ear and my teammates tackle me. The crowd’s roar sounds as loud as a freight train.
We did it!
I can barely breathe even with my helmet off. Our hugs, our slaps in the pads, and elation; there is no way to fully prepare and digest this feeling.
“We’re gonna celebrate tonight!” Moses palms cup my face. “We did it! We did it!” His tears in his eyes sparkle under the lights. “We’ve got the girls, we got the Cristal, we are partying like it’s 1999, baby!”
I meet his high five in the air and grasp it.
“Nah, man. I’ve got my own thing tonight.”
“Okay, you missin’ out, though! Antwon and I are gonna live it up!”
“And you should. We fucking did it!”
The hotel room is booked. I booked the suite of the best hotel in Dallas months ago as motivation. A promise is a promise. I just hope she lives up to her promise. She said she would be here.
After showering and redressing in my best suit and giving interviews, my family rushed to my side with their own hugs, tears, and praises.
“Aunt Maria! Uncle Gino!”
“We wouldn’t miss this moment for the world. Even if we lived on Mars! We’d be here, boy. I’m so proud of you.”
“Thank you.…” I say, truly grateful, but I’m staring still. Scanning… for her.
And then I see her.
I knew she’d come. Her face is radiant as ever, her curls so silky and soft. I can’t wait to run my fingers through them. I can’t wait to—
My eyes drop lower.
Dressed in a fitted long sleeved navy blue dress and winter boots, she has an undeniable baby bump and my heart drops.
Had she been with someone after Capri? Some Italian lover? Is that why she barely even spoke to me and didn’t reciprocate the desire to really be with me in Vancouver? ‘Cause I put it out there at the elevators. Hell yeah, I did.
“Excuse me, Auntie and Uncle Gino. I need to speak to Willow for a moment.”
“Certainly, dear.”
It was as secluded as we could manage with the press everywhere and lingering family members and close friends of us players.
“Congratulations, Luca. I’m so proud of you.” Her eyes glisten with pooling tears. “You were right. It is chilling and amazing seeing the crowd as you said they would be back last summer.”
I kiss her on the cheek and glance lightly down to her belly.
She is the most gorgeous pregnant woman.
The royal blue is the Derricks team color and it was thoughtful of her to wear it.
“You look beautiful, Willow.”
“Thank you, Luca,” she says nervously. I can tell she’s nervous. It’s written over her face.
I know she’s about to tell me something that will be the biggest blow. At least I’ll hear it on the day of my greatest victory. It will outweigh the shattering personal defeat.
“I’d like you to meet someone, Luca.”
I look around for her Italian lover. Where is he? Where’s my competition?
She reaches for my hand and places it softly on her belly. A little kick says hello to me and something in me instantly melts. Shifts.
Chills, the same crazy emotions I experienced out on the field come rushing back to me.
I swallow back a lump in my throat and stare at her watery eyes.
“Luca, meet your daughter. Capri.”
I can’t pick up my jaw off the floor.
“Wh-what?”
“I wanted you to stay focused, Luca. I knew how important it was for you to perform for your team. For your coach. For your fans. For America! That’s why I didn’t tell you in Vancouver. And I needed to just figure things out. How I felt. Now I know.”
“Wait, what?” My hands are flying in the air in excitement. “How long are you? Are we? Before you answer that, there’s one thing I have to do.”
My hands cup the back of her neck and I kiss her like it’s the most important kiss of my life. Bright lights flash all around us as people gasp and sing our praises.
I have a feeling this will be an iconic photo in tomorrow’s headline. I just know it.
“Well, baby. Just so you know. You’re mine for life now. There’s one more thing to know.” I kiss her even harder and judging by the way she melts into my body, I’ve just taken her breath away.
Oh, she has no idea how many more breaths I’ll be taking away from her later when I’m between her legs.
* * *
WILLOW
* * *
Dear Willow,
* * *
Congratulations, honey! I saw the news today. I know your head is probably spinning, especially after having such a quaint summer and fall in Italy.
I heard some crazy rumor that you've been without a phone for nearly 6 months. Honestly, must be nice.
I just want you to know, hon, that you're an amazing, talented journalist. I want to encourage you to not be afraid of your newfound spotlight. You can really do some good in the world. You can spread a lot of light because now people are really listening.
You have a newfound audience. More people than ever will listen to what you have to say. I just wanted to encourage you as I know it may be scary. I have been in your shoes.
When the whole world found out about my very unwanted sex tape between Ramon and I, it opened up the door for me to find a whole new platform. I used it for good and have helped change a lot of lives with my personal story of fitness and the struggles I used to face in high school.
I know you’ll dazzle the masses just the same, scratch that, if not more!
I hope to see you soon in the land of the Internet world, sharing your brilliance with all.
And I look forward to coming to the beautiful baby shower honoring your precious little one growing inside, Capri.
* * *
All My Love,
Cat Johnson
Chapter 24
One year, four months later….
LUCA
* * *
The late spring air is just right. Just right.
“How was the ferry over here?” I ask Uncle Gino as I pass him the bread basket.
“Delightful! Perfect day for the sea.”
“We saw a few dolphins, and the water looked extra aqua blue!” Maria chimes in. “Um… this sauce is just delicious, absolutely scrumptious, Willow!”
Willow made every single dish on this table.
“Thank you!” Willow calls from a few feet away, out on the blanket with our daughter, Capri. “I have had great teachers!”
“Yes, but this is a gift. It’s art. The way you have everything together, it’s magazine worthy.”
“Oh, I don’t know about that.…”
“It is!”
I snap a photo of our family lunch and brag about my wife’s cooking skills on an Instagram post.
My wife’s hot, smart, and a master chef. #luckiesthusband
* * *
“It's so good to have you here once again in the summers, Luca. This is what family is all about.” Uncle Gino passes a bowl of caprese salad my way.
“It sure is. I just love having this little one around again. I just can’t get enough of her! When are you going to let us watch her one night or two? You two can dash off for a romantic getaway.”
“When do I sign up?”
I take a sip of my cold ice tea and lean back in the chair, admiration in my eyes as I stare at my two loves.
“Aw, thanks, Maria! That’s the sweetest offer! Are you sure you’re ready to chase around a toddler who has more energy than all the espresso beans that are on this island?” she laughs.
“Oh, I’d welcome even more!”
“Trust me, Auntie. I’m working on it. I’m an Italian stallion. I’m working on that. We’ll have a full offensive line before you know it. I’ve gotta make up for lost time.” I wink.
“Offensive line! That’s like five children! Does this baby maker even get a say about this formation?” she teases.
I shake my head playfully, no, you don’t have a say. And I blow her a kiss.
“You know you want it!”
“Love, life, marriage, children, food, wine, that’s what life’s all about. Which reminds me, I’m so happy your father’s getting married and has found love again. He sounds just like he did when he first met your mom, Luca.” Gino cleared his throat. “And your mother, too, Willow!”
We all laughed.
“Yeah, Dad got trigger-happy again.”
“Capri’s going to have a new Grandmommy,” Willow sings to Capri and kisses her on the cheek. “Last time we saw Giorgio, he was walking on cloud nine with Anna. And they are the cutest thing ever together.”
“Well, maybe this new wife will have some sort of long lost second cousin we can get to settle your wild sister, Stella, down! You never know!”
“Yeah, that will take a miracle,” I mumble into my garlic bread.
“Well, I shall go and light a candle at St. Michael’s and say a prayer later today.”
“Oh, you’re going to have to burn the whole place down and go straight for a bonfire to get angelic intervention on that wild soul. There’s not enough candles for that wild one.” I can’t help but burst into laughter.
“It will take every candle on this island to maybe even elicit a peek from St. Michael before he rolls his eyes at that one.” I laugh even harder.
The table rumbles with laughter.
“Well.…” Maria sighs. “Never say never. I won’t give up on that one. I will go light my candle, nevertheless!” She waves her breadstick.
“Have you read Willow’s latest blog post?” I ask the table.
“No! Read it to me!” Aunt Maria thrillingly dabs at the edges of her lips with her linen napkin.
“Oh, Willow. I’m so proud of you already!”
“Aw, thanks…well, I just really wrote from my heart, you know?” My gorgeous wife tilts her head sideways. With her fedora summer hat and her oversized glasses, I can’t help but snap a photo of my two girls. It will be a framer for sure.
One for us to always remember, marking our first summer together as a family at our new home in Capri, Italy, a tradition that we’ll carry on every year.
I upload another picture on my personal Instagram page. It’s crazy how many photos there are of my baby girl and wife on my account. I’ve become the very thing people thought I’d never become, a family man.
In the last year, my page has turned to obsessed father and proud, doting husband. I get jokes about it all the time by the guys and in the press about the absolute softy I’ve become, but the truth is, I’m happy. Family life suits me in a way I never knew it would or could. Now all I want to do is spend time with the people who mean the most in the world to me.
“Okay…I found it.” I switch to Willow’s website. “Are you all ready for wise words from Willow Medici?”
* * *
WILLOW
* * *
As I watch my husband admire my words, eager to share and cheer me on, I can’t help but get a wee bit emotional and I wipe at a happy tear falling down my cheek.
My heart feels so full, so happy, so warm.
I feel so blessed, so lucky, so found.
Sitting on the lawn of an absolute dream home overlooking the most magical waters in the world, I can’t help but think, maybe I am reaping the seeds of my mother’s sacrifice.
Looking down at my little Capri and seeing the light in her eyes, the innocence, it’s confirmation enough that I was being guided the day I left my career on the spot.
This.
My free hand rests on the soft, vibrant green grass.
This is real life. Real happiness.
Real news.
* * *
In the past, the feeling of belonging was something very foreign to me. As a truther reporter for the past 10 years, I've always felt like a fish out of water in the real world.
Shakespeare said it best: ignorance is bliss. While I am not promoting ignorance by any means or being uninformed, I do believe that sometimes one can simply know a little bit too much for their own good, which can become very isolating at times.
I know what that used to feel like.
From connecting the dots and uncovering so much truth, I felt the calling to awaken as many people as I could. But in doing so, I never felt more alienated and separated.
The stories I reported and information I shared over the past years, while they presented truth, facts, uncovered secrets, and important matters to be addressed, most often left a lot up in the air for the “what next” and “what can I do with this information?”
By exposing the truth, there's always a cost.
I do value those who are brave enough to turn over these secrets that need to be known. But for me, my time has ended. There is a season and a time for everything under the sun. There is also nothing new under the sun. Everything that is happening today has already happened before and will happen again.
Where do I want to be on this wheel?
How do I want to live?
I've learned over my sabbatical, the best way to really make a difference in life is to first of all make sure your own life is healthy and in balance. Then, live your life from joy. That’s what creates a ripple effect, inspiring others to create the same in their own life, and in their immediate family, thus, then, the community.
Fear cripples.
Joy frees.
A wise man very close to me, who happens to be the grandfather of my baby daughter, Capri, once said that the table is meant for eating and sharing. Eating at it alone would be the greatest tragedy. And spending hours in isolation alone reporting and digging, well, I had a wealth of information on the inside and was full of knowledge, but I was very hungry relationship wise.
