Stone, page 22
I stare at her a long moment, memorizing the way she looks right now. Crushed and disappointed. I’m used to people feeling that way about me, so I’m not sure why it hurts so much. But I deserve it.
I nod, accepting the way things are.
I turn for the door and when my hand hits the knob, she says, “This has nothing to do with you and me, but don’t ever forget… even when you are having a moment of weakness, you can never forget that you still have strength.”
I don’t dare turn around to look at her. It would only make me feel more ashamed. I walk out and close the door behind me.
And I know I’ve just lost the most incredible thing I’ve ever had in my life.
CHAPTER 25
Harlow
I finish reading the psychological evaluation that my client, Tonya Hillman, underwent two weeks ago. She’s right now my most important case, and she happens to be my favorite client. Tonya went through a few years of incredible darkness, which included a heroin addiction. In that time, she lost custody of her three-year-old son Charlie, who was put in foster care. Tonya fell so hard and fast out of normalcy, she spent over a year homeless, sleeping on the streets or on friends’ couches and doing horrible things for her drug fix.
But she’s a different person today. She went voluntarily into rehab, finally acknowledging the pain of losing her son was worth the fight to overcome her addiction.
Unfortunately, by the time she completed rehab, got a steady job, and was able to save some money to hire me, the courts were already deep into the process of finalizing adoption papers for her son with his foster family.
Tonya hired me to stop that process and get him back.
That case is moving slowly through the courts. The psychological evaluation had to be made. Tonya has to meet certain milestones. She has to prove her sobriety is here to stay, and she won’t be getting full custody back until she’s able to show a long pattern of sober behavior.
But for now, we need to stop the adoption.
There will be a huge hearing in a few weeks during which I’ll present all the necessary case law to support Tonya’s case. Pennsylvania fortunately favors birth parents, so we have a leg up. I was even able to get the court to grant visitation rights, and for the last three months, Tonya has been able to see Charlie twice a week for two hours at a time, supervised, of course. I decided to come into the office today to go over my research and work on my memorandum of law that I’ll be submitting to the court. It’s not due until the hearing date, but I needed something to take my mind off Stone. There’s nothing better than concentrating on my most important case.
It’s disturbingly quiet in the office, but that’s a Saturday for you. The phones aren’t ringing, and I don’t hear Bonita’s laughter out in the reception area. I even left Odin home because I just wanted to be alone. I wanted to dive into Tonya’s case, let myself get sucked down into the fulfillment of making the justice system work for the ordinary person, and forget about how badly Stone hurt me.
I was blindsided last night by his revelation that he couldn’t be the man for me. I don’t understand how I could’ve misjudged him so badly. Was I perhaps focused too much on what I loved about Brooks in him?
None of what he told me as he stood in my foyer made sense. How could he take everything we’ve been building through weeks of friendship, and most recently deep intimacy, and throw it all away because he got a little spooked? Because he doesn’t understand how my parents aren’t more upset that Brian isn’t doing something with his life? Or that my dad didn’t strong-arm me into staying with the firm?
It’s all bullshit. I know damn well the real Stone Dumelin doesn’t care about things like Brian being a playboy, and I sure as hell know that he knows how much I love my career just as it is. I’m hoping when he thinks about it, he’ll understand it was bullshit too. It was a moment of fear, and I can be okay with that.
I have a much deeper knowledge and understanding of weakness than I’d like.
Christ, the minute he walked out that door, I wanted to drink. My mouth literally filled with saliva at the thought of slamming a few shots of vodka. I hate that he did that to me. I loathe it even more that I let him become a weak moment.
Even when you are having a moment of weakness, you can never forget that you still have strength.
I told him that last night before he walked out. I had to keep repeating that mantra to myself so I wouldn’t go to the liquor store and drown my sorrows. I haven’t wanted to drink like that since Brooks died, and last night it felt a bit like Stone was permanently lost to me too.
What I did do instead was oogle the closest AA meeting, get my coat, and walk right back out the door. There wasn’t one at the local church hall, but I found one about twenty minutes away. And it did its job because by the time I left, I felt more in control.
I didn’t have the greatest sleep last night, although cuddling Odin certainly helped. But when I woke this morning, I knew I had to do something to take my mind off things. Thus, I am here getting lost in Tonya’s case. I’m happy to report that my desperate need to drown my sorrows in alcohol is gone, the AA meeting having strengthened my resolve.
This morning all I needed to do was look in the mirror and remind myself that my determination to stay sober is greater than any pain someone could inflict upon me.
It’s working, for now.
Am I still devastated over what happened last night?
I am.
Do I think things are hopeless?
I don’t.
In the bright light of day, I remember one very important thing.
Stone is a strong man. He’s overcome so much, and I refuse to believe that he’s going to let this moment of doubt ruin things between us. My game plan is to lie low and hope he comes to his senses.
And if he doesn’t… I’ll deal with the pain and disappointment later.
For now, I have Tonya Hillman’s case to keep me busy.
I dive deep into legal research online, thanks to a company called LexisNexis who has digitized all the research books an attorney could ever want or need. I was never the strongest researcher, and half the time I would hand it off to a law clerk, but that was back when I worked in a big fancy firm and had law clerks to do my research.
Now I have to do it myself, and it’s not my favorite part of the job.
My phone rings and I consider ignoring it, but I recognize the ringtone as my neighbor Natalie. She’s my unit two neighbor, and her wife Liz is pregnant and very close to her due date, so I wonder right away if that’s why she’s calling.
“What’s up, Natalie? Is it time?” I ask as soon as the line connects.
Natalie sighs with heavy frustration. “Not time. We got sidetracked by some Braxton Hicks contractions last night, but so far, the little nugget doesn’t want to come out.”
“Then may I suggest you two go for a very long walk today? I know it’s cold this morning, but you can bundle up.”
The temperatures dropped to freezing last night in a weird cold front that came through western Pennsylvania. It’s supposed to warm up this afternoon, though, into the sixties.
“We’ll definitely do that, but that’s not why I’m calling. I wanted to let you know that I just came in from the grocery store, and there was a man and woman waiting outside of our building. They said they were Stone’s parents here to visit him, and he wasn’t answering the intercom. I let them in, and they’re waiting outside his door. He doesn’t seem to be home.”
I don’t think to question Natalie to see if she’s positive it’s his parents. There’s no way a random couple would come to this building that’s not even in Stone’s or Brooks’s names since the property is owned by a dummy corporation to protect their identities. I have no doubt that it’s Stone’s parents.
I don’t berate her for letting them in. I know she did it just to get them out of the cold.
“I went and knocked on Stone’s door, but he’s not answering, so I’m assuming he’s out somewhere.”
“He might have gone to the arena already,” I muse since he has a game tonight. “It’s earlier than he normally goes, but that would be my guess. I’ll text him and let him know, and I’ll head over and talk to them.”
I thank Natalie for calling me, and when I hang up, I tap my phone against my chin for a moment.
I have no clue why his parents are here. The text that Stone sent his dad a few days ago was an absolute cutoff in their relationship. Stone even blocked his father’s number so he couldn’t call.
Maybe they’re here to make amends with Stone. Maybe Stone severing the relationship finally made his dad wake up. Maybe they’re worried about him.
I’m an optimist by nature and refuse to believe that they’re here to cause trouble, although I’m not foolish enough to deny that possibility. Regardless, I’m going over there to see what they want and will offer them hospitality at my place until Stone can tell me what to do.
I shoot a quick text to Stone.
Your mom and dad are at the condo. Natalie let them in and they’re waiting outside your door. I’m at the office working, but I’m going over there and will let them into my place until you can tell me what to tell them.
I send the text and wait a few moments to see if Stone responds. When he doesn’t, I assume that he either has his phone off or is unable to look at it. Despite the way we left things last night, I know he would not purposely ignore me about his parents.
I save my work, log off my computer, and grab my purse, keys, and coat. When I exit my office building, I turn my collar up against the brisk wind.
It takes only about five minutes to walk from my office to the condo, and when I make it to the top of the stairs, I lay eyes on Stone’s father. His back is to me and he’s talking with animated hands to a woman I assume is Stone’s mom.
As I proceed down the hall, my movement catches Mrs. Dumelin’s eye, and her husband pivots to face me.
It only takes a second for him to recognize me, and his eyes flare wide before narrowing in anger.
“What the hell are you doing here?” he demands.
Before I can respond, he goes on the attack. “Don’t bother answering that. I’ve got it all figured out. You were fucking Stone and somehow both of you got Brooks to agree to leave his entire estate to his brother. I don’t know how you talked Brooks into it, but I’m not going to stand for these criminal actions.”
I had thought that Mr. Dumelin’s last text to Stone sounded a little bananas, but hearing that type of craziness straight from his mouth is shocking. I actually halt, unsure what to do now. There’s no doubt he is unwilling to have a reasonable, calm conversation.
I figure my best bet is to spin on my heel and head out of there. His parents can sit in the hallway until hell freezes over for all I care. It’s not an option to go to my unit because Mr. Dumelin stands in between me and my door, but besides that… I don’t think I want him knowing I live here. As of this moment, he thinks I’m here to see Stone.
“That’s it, isn’t it?” he snarls, striding down the hall with his fists balled in anger.
“Mason,” Stone’s mother implores, “please… let’s not—”
Mason Dumelin whirls and stomps back toward his wife, who shrinks in fear. “Don’t you fucking start on me, Nancy.”
She apologizes with downcast eyes. “Of course. You’re right. I don’t know what I was thinking.”
I frown at the scene playing out in front of me, taking in his aggressive stance, the way he went after her but stopped the minute she apologized.
Is he abusing her? Stone never said that his dad was physical with his mother, but I know he hit Stone and Brooks when they were growing up.
It makes me sick to my stomach but also fills me with a loathing for this man that I didn’t think was possible.
“Leave her alone,” I say with a steady voice, knowing his attention will come back on me and this could get ugly.
Mr. Dumelin whips around, his face mottled with fury that I would dare question him. He comes back after me, long strides down the hallway that eat up the distance between us. “And what the fuck do you know, bitch?”
I hold out my hands and try to speak in a calm, soothing manner. “Mr. Dumelin, I know you’re upset. Perhaps we can sit down and talk about this over coffee.”
He doesn’t stop but continues to barrel toward me. I consider attempting to skirt past him, perhaps get to my own door and open it to let Odin out. But there’s no way I’ll make it if he attacks me.
Stone’s dad moves too close and grabs the lapels of my coat. He spins me around and pushes me into the wall. It’s not hard enough to hurt, but he’s strong enough that I cannot move.
His eyes look wild with insanity. “You cost me a lot of money, you fucking whore, and I’m going to—”
He doesn’t finish the sentence because he’s simply gone. Torn away from me by a massive person who barrels into him like a linebacker taking down a quarterback.
Mr. Dumelin flies to the ground, and it takes me a moment to realize it’s Stone standing there over his dad. He’s sweaty but dressed in jeans, so I know he didn’t go out for a run.
Mason pushes himself up into a sitting position, and rather than ordering him to stay down, Stone actually helps his dad up.
But not by the hand, and not in a nice way.
He grabs his father by fistfuls of his coat, whirls him around just like was done to me moments ago, and shoves him into the wall so hard, it had to hurt.
Stone snarls at his father, “If you ever put your fucking hands on Harlow again, I will end you.”
I’m stunned. He just threatened to kill his own father, although I know rationally, it’s his anger talking.
“Stone,” his mother exclaims as she rushes forward. She puts her hand on Stone’s shoulder. “That’s your father. You talk with respect.”
Mason swivels his head sharply to look at his wife. “I don’t need you defending me, woman.”
Nancy shrinks back and lowers her gaze to the floor. Stone hasn’t taken his eyes off his father, though. He speaks in a low growl that sends a cold shiver up my spine. “I want you to leave and never come back. You are not welcome here or anywhere around me. If you come back, I will call the police.”
Stone doesn’t wait to see if his father nods in agreement. I’m sure he figures his father won’t agree to anything. He starts to loosen his hold, but Mason tries to assert his masculinity and control by shoving Stone’s hands off him. “You don’t tell me what to do.”
I don’t know if Mason is just so self-centered and egotistical that he would never think Stone would do this, but the next thing I know, Stone is ushering his father along the hallway, one hand on the back of his coat and the other on his arm. Mason is no match for his son’s strength, and although he struggles, Stone has no problem dragging him down the stairs. I rush that way and bend over the railing to watch him open the exterior door, shove his dad out onto the sidewalk, and shut it again where it auto locks.
Mason bangs on the door, but Stone calmly turns away and trots back up the staircase. He doesn’t spare me a glance but moves straight to his mother who is wringing her hands with worry.
He doesn’t touch his mother, but he speaks gently to her. “Mom… you do not have to go with him. You can come into my place right now and stay as long as you want. You do not have to stay with him ever again. All you have to do is say the word, and I will take care of you.”
My eyes sting with tears at such a generous offer. His mother has never been there for him, and he did not witness what I saw his father nearly do to her. I guess Stone suspects that she may not be as complicit in his father’s delusions of grandeur but maybe is just too fearful to be anything other than what she is.
It’s incredibly sad and pathetic when she shakes her head and mumbles, “I’m sorry, but he needs me.”
She scurries past Stone, then me, and heads down the staircase. Stone follows her but as he passes me, he says, “Don’t go anywhere.”
He has yet to look me in the eye.
I assume Stone is going downstairs to make sure his dad doesn’t muscle his way back in. And I’m certainly glad he showed up to take care of the situation. But I don’t answer to his beck and call, and I remember that he’s the one who broke things off. I’m most certainly not going to wait around.
I head to my condo, unlock the door, and once inside, shut it behind me.
I lean back against it and sigh, my heart heavy that Stone once again had to see how much his parents don’t care about him. I hate that for him, and I hope it’s something he’ll be able to reconcile one day.
Odin is sleeping on the couch and makes a slow exit off of it, stretching luxuriously with a big yawn. He starts to walk my way but halts when my door is pushed open. Given that I’m still leaning against it, I am pushed out of the way, and Stone comes inside without an invitation.
“What are you doing?” I say as I whirl on him.
Odin growls, taking a cue from my exasperated tone.
Stone’s eyes move from me to Odin, and he points at my dog. “Don’t you even start in on me. I’m here to apologize to your mom, so give me a fucking break.”
His tone is harsh and any normal dog who doesn’t understand words but operates off vibes would’ve continued growling.
To my shock, however, Odin merely sits his butt down and watches us both carefully.
“I’m sorry, Harlow,” Stone says, and it jolts me that he’s speaking to me directly. I turn my head to him.
Stone’s palms move to my cheeks. “I’m sorry for all the stupid shit I said to you last night. I meant all of it, but I don’t want any of it to mean anything at all. Does that make sense?”
I frown and shake my head. “It makes no sense whatsoever.”
“What I’m trying to say is that all those feelings I had were real and legitimate, and they were clearly brought on by the fact that I have a fucked-up, dysfunctional family causing me doubt. But I was wrong in letting them eat at me in a way that caused me to give up on us. It’s not who I am. I’m not the guy who gives up anymore.”
