Gage, page 10
“I can understand that. I have a niece, and I miss her so much. I can’t wait to have kids.”
“You’ll be a great mother,” Brienne says softly.
“I think you would too,” I reply, because while she might not have time or even want to have a family, Brienne cares about people.
“No thank you,” she drawls, shaking her head with a laugh. “I’m horrible with kids. When I say I wanted nieces and nephews to spoil, I mean by buying them stuff. Kids and I don’t connect at all.”
“Really?” I ask in astonishment.
“No real experience, but the few times I’ve been around kids, I about break into hives.”
I laugh because I know she’s exaggerating, and she grins back at me.
Brienne tips her glass and drains the rest of her whiskey. She stands from her chair, and I scramble to do the same. Her eyes drop to my drink. “Not to your liking?”
Wrinkling my nose, I shake my head. “Little too strong for me. I don’t think I have more than the few tiny sips in me.”
Chuckling, Brienne takes my glass. “What is your drink of choice?”
“Wine,” I admit.
“Red or white?”
“Either,” I say.
“I’ll get some, and we’ll enjoy it together one day,” she says as she moves over to the wet bar.
“You don’t have to,” I say awkwardly.
“Nonsense.” She deposits the glasses on the marble countertop and then faces me. “I don’t connect with many women, Jenna, but I do connect with you.”
“I feel the same,” I admit.
“Then we shall occasionally share a drink here and avail ourselves of gossip and other fun things.”
“I’d like that.” I kind of want to hug her, but that would be inappropriate.
“Just remember… I’m always the boss,” she says sternly, but I also see the twinkle in her eye.
Still, it’s something I’ll never need reminded of. “I’ll be respectful of that line,” I assure her.
“I admire you, Jenna,” she says as we walk to the door. She opens it and stands back for me to walk through. “And I don’t admire a lot of people.”
“Thank you,” I say softly as I glance back. “My sister says that, Gage said it… now you. I might start to believe it.”
“You better,” she says fiercely. “Now, I expect to hear all the details about your second date with Gage.”
Laughing, I nod. “Deal.”
CHAPTER 11
Jenna
“Are you okay?” Sophie asks as she twirls the straw in her drink. She ordered a screwdriver, and I’ve already finished half my wine.
I wipe my sweaty hands on my jeans. “I’m fine.”
“Are you nervous about seeing Gage?” she asks, and boy, she has no clue how spot-on she is.
Sophie knows Gage and I went on a date night before last, and of course, she sort of knows this is our second date, so to speak, since Gage invited Baden and Sophie to join us for drinks at Mario’s after the game. Sophie and I are waiting for the guys, but she said it could be a bit since they had postgame talks and showers to handle before heading over.
What Sophie doesn’t know is that we kissed, because when I told her about my first “date” with Gage, I downplayed it. Told her we went out and grabbed a bite, making it seem far more friendly than flirtatious.
However, she does know it was Gage’s idea for the four of us to hang out tonight, so maybe she’s assuming there might be more.
I guess it’s time to fill her in completely. “We kissed.”
She blinks. “Excuse me?”
“Gage and me. We kissed. Or rather, he kissed me at the end of our first date. More than once. And it was really, really good. And then he sent me flowers yesterday, and he texts me just out of the blue to see how I’m doing, and even sends me funny GIFs. But he called me last night, because he says he likes the sound of my voice. Who says that to a woman? I mean, who really means that? But he does. Gosh, Sophie… he’s so genuine and kind. The real deal, and yes… to answer your damn question, I’m nervous.”
When I finally shut up, Sophie’s mouth is hanging open. Only one word comes out. “Wow.”
I groan and pick up my wineglass to take a fortifying sip. “I’m going to get drunk tonight.”
Sophie places a hand on my forearm and pushes it down. “Lie low on the sauce, or you might end up sleeping with Gage tonight.”
I look at her in horror. “No way. Uh-uh.”
She frowns at me. “You don’t want to have sex with him? I mean… because you have seen him, right?”
“Yes, I want to have sex with him.” Then I close my eyes, shake my head. “I mean, no… I don’t… not while drunk. Or anytime soon. Maybe soon. I don’t know, Sophie. I’m not used to this type of attention. I’ve never had someone like Gage interested in me, and well, let’s just say my prior experiences weren’t great. I really like him, but I’m still having a hard time believing he’s real. Know what I mean?”
A dreamy look comes over her face. “I know exactly what you mean. It’s how I felt about Baden for the longest time. I thought we’d never be anything beyond friends, and I wanted more, but I was afraid to believe it could happen.”
“How did you get past that?” I ask, curious that she might have a legit answer.
“Time,” she says simply. “Communication. You need to be honest with your fears. Baden had insecurities because of his injuries. I had insecurities because of my PTSD. We were open about it. If you’re nervous, you tell Gage. Simple as that.”
I snort, laughing at the image. “I can see me telling him I’m nervous about being intimate and then him telling me that was never on his agenda.”
“Oh, it’s on his agenda,” Sophie says with a resounding nod. “A man doesn’t send flowers or call to hear your voice if he’s not interested in that way.”
I can’t help but smile, the same smile that’s been plastered on my face since Gage kissed me. “He’s really a great guy. Like, so great, it doesn’t seem real. When he sees me getting insecure with my scars, he tells me not to doubt him. He’s so sincere, I have to believe him.”
“You should,” Sophie says solemnly. “Baden says they don’t get better than Gage. He’s the real deal… not just as a man, or a friend… but as a human being.”
“How’d I get so lucky to snag his notice?”
“Who cares?” Sophie says with a laugh. “Just go with it and enjoy.”
“You’re right,” I agree, knowing I have to quit worrying about the what-ifs or I will sabotage myself.
While sipping our drinks, I give her more details about our first date. The bar and restaurant are filled to capacity with fans who trickled over after the game. It’s loud and jubilant, despite the Titans 2–1 loss after a hard-fought battle against the Houston Jam. Sophie tells me the city has been absolutely nuts in their support of the new team, and it’s always a celebration after every game because we actually have a team to celebrate. That really touches me.
I hate that the Titans lost, but the only goal came from Gage, and it was thrilling to cheer for him in a different capacity from just being a fan or an employee of the organization.
The man had his lips on mine two nights ago, and that made watching him extra special.
Sophie’s eyes light up as she spies something behind me, and she raises her hand. I tense, knowing it must be Baden and Gage she’s waving to.
I swivel on my stool at our high-top table for four Gage had reserved. Here he comes, looking impossibly more gorgeous than the last time I saw him. He’s dressed casually in jeans, which he must’ve brought with him to the arena since I know they arrive in suits. The black Henley fits his torso so well, I can see the curves and dips to his chest muscles between the edges of the leather jacket he’s wearing over it.
He’s laughing at something Baden says, but then he turns his head my way and our eyes lock. His smile slides a little, only to ease into an appreciative curve as he notices what I’m wearing.
His jersey.
Over a turtleneck, of course.
Baden moves past me to reach Sophie, and perhaps he even greets me, but I have no clue. All I can do is stare at Gage as he walks toward me.
“You got a Heyward jersey,” he says, staring down at me.
I shrug. “He’s my favorite player, so yeah.”
Gage laughs and then to my surprise, delight, and slight embarrassment, he leans down and kisses me. So easy with displays of affection, but I still tense up and force myself to stay in the moment. Both pleasure and pain—it’s hard for me to trust—but I have to believe it will get easier to enjoy and accept.
“It looks good on you,” he murmurs as he draws back. “I feel like a dumbass. I should’ve gotten you one.”
I shake my head. “No. I would’ve never expected—”
“I know,” he says, placing a finger over my lips to silence me. “Doesn’t mean you don’t deserve to have someone give you nice things.”
Pushing his hand away, I remind him, “You gave me flowers.”
“I’ll give you more if you let me,” he says, and it’s done in a low rumble so only I can hear it. The double entendre sends a shiver up my spine.
A waitress appears quickly. She’d been hovering, ready to pounce, when Gage and Baden showed up as she knew Gage had reserved the table and obviously, the hockey players are treated like royalty.
We soon settle around the table and discuss the game for a bit. I update Baden and Sophie on my job, and we talk about the documentary. There’s a lot of teasing that Gage will become a big film star, and Sophie fills us in on their house hunt. She wants to remodel an old Victorian for them to live in, and while I can tell it’s not Baden’s cup of tea, he hangs on every word she says. If she’s pleased, then he’s pleased.
Throughout it all and over the course of two drinks, Gage draws a lot of attention from the fans. Several stand off a few feet and take photos of him sitting there. Some come up and ask for autographs and pictures together. He’s gracious to all of them, taking particular care and extra time with the kids.
I enjoy watching him.
Except when it’s women seeking his attention, and not women in general. I’m discovering a certain type of fan who goes above and beyond just wanting an autograph or a simple photo. They tend to be scantily dressed and do a lot of pouty lips and snuggling in too tight before the camera clicks.
In fairness, Gage doesn’t seem to enjoy those interactions. Just as I can tell he’s a little tense when it’s a group of rowdy, drunk male fans. I suppose one would call this the perils of celebrity.
More importantly, I logically understand that my own insecurities about my outward appearance are magnified when I see Gage near a beautiful, sexy woman. And that’s my problem to deal with.
In fact, it’s absolutely imperative I learn how to handle it because I don’t want to withdraw. I don’t want to mess things up.
And I don’t want to be that way.
In between autographs and pictures, we have a lot of laughs with Baden and Sophie. Gage moves his stool right beside me so he can drape his arm over the back of mine. Periodically, he lets his thumb graze the back of my shoulder, and it’s not in a sexual way. It’s not really even a sign of affection. I think it’s more along the lines of him saying without words, I’m here. I’m with you. No need to be nervous about any of this.
At least, that’s how I’m choosing to take it.
The waitress reappears and asks if we want refills. Gage glances at his watch before lifting his eyes to mine. “Let’s get out of here. Any interest in a walk along the river?”
I blink in surprise that he’d even think such a thing. Maybe I’m really out of practice with this whole dating business, but I thought the date was this… sitting in Mario’s and spending time with Baden and Sophie.
There’s no helping my smile, because as much as I’m enjoying being here with friends, I’d love time alone. “Let’s do it.”
Baden smirks. “That sounds like a great idea.”
Gage gives him a mock glare across the table as he stands from the stool, holding out his hand to help me off. “You’re not invited.” He then looks to Sophie. “No offense.”
“None taken.” She laughs.
Gage helps me into my coat. While the mid-April days have been lovely here, the evenings are still chilly.
I wave goodbye to our friends and let Gage lead me by the hand out of Mario’s.
We head east on the Three Rivers Heritage Trail toward the baseball park that sits adjacent to the Roberto Clemente Bridge. It’s a clear night, and the river is calm. The reflection of downtown buildings, all lit up, along the water’s surface is almost magical.
Gage holds my hand, and we walk slowly as we talk. Others are out tonight, and I notice some recognize Gage as we pass. But his attention is focused solely on me as we stroll.
“Sorry about getting interrupted back at Mario’s,” Gage says. “It didn’t happen at dinner on our first date because I had them seat us in a semiprivate area. In nice places like that, people stay back. But in Mario’s, it’s a lot more festive and there’s alcohol, so that—”
“It’s fine,” I say, glancing up at him.
“Not always,” he replies. “It’s intrusive, especially if we’re spending time together. I just want you to know, I try to be cognizant of it. I don’t ever want you feeling left out.”
I’m not sure he could say anything more perfect. In fact, I’m wondering if Gage might just be without flaws, which I suppose gives me a bit of confidence when I say, “I have to admit… watching half-naked women hang on you isn’t fun.”
Gage snorts and gives me an admonishing look. “First… they weren’t half-naked, although I’ll admit there seemed to be increased cleavage on some of them.”
“Aha!” I proclaim, pointing a finger at him. “You noticed.”
“Everyone noticed,” he throws back with a smirk, “including you.”
“Yeah.” Can’t help but chuckle. “It was sort of out there, huh?”
“I imagine that’s not fun for girlfriends to see—”
Wait a minute. Did he just say girlfriend?
“—but know that stuff doesn’t interest me. It didn’t interest me before I met you. Those type of women don’t do it for me.”
I consider his words, and I want to believe him.
I need to believe him.
And there’s no reason why I shouldn’t. Gage has never given me reason to believe he doesn’t find me likable, attractive, and sufficient for him.
But am I, really?
“Ugh,” I growl out loud, and he looks at me with raised eyebrows. I shake my head. “I’m sorry. I get in my head all the time. It’s something I have to work through.”
Gage stops, turns toward me. My back is to the river, and the reflection of city lights in his eyes is magnetic. “We’re not talking about low self-esteem here, are we?”
I chew my bottom lip. Are we?
His hands go to my face and pull my gaze to his. “You’re not a low self-esteem kind of woman. Your confidence might be dinged up, but it’s situational, right?”
“I’m sorry. But there were a lot of unkind people after I stepped back into my life after I recovered. There are still a lot of unkind people. I expect it now rather than consider it an unusual moment.”
“I hate that for you, Jenna,” he murmurs. “But I also don’t expect you to take my word for it when I say I think you’re beautiful and I’m attracted to you and you have absolutely no reason to doubt these words. I guess I’m going to have to keep showing you.”
His head dips to kiss me, but I put my hands to his chest and pull my head back a bit. “But… why?”
“You’ve asked me that before,” he says in exasperation. “My response is the same. Why not?”
I shake my head. “Yeah, I know that. And I’m not looking for you to stroke my ego. But you seem determined. You’re putting in so much effort with me, and yes, I’ll accept and believe you like me and there’s attraction—”
“Both ways, right?”
“What?” I ask, confused he’s gotten me off track.
“You’re attracted to me, right?” he asks with a grin.
I roll my eyes. “Of course I’m attracted to you.”
“Then prove it,” he dares, dropping his hands. “Prove it right now. Make the move on me. You kiss me, and you prove to me that you feel the same as I do for you.”
My eyes widen, my skin flushes, and my mouth gapes.
“Go on,” he taunts. “Prove it. You keep needing me to prove it to you, but honestly… how do you feel about all this? Don’t tell me… show me.”
I glance left, then right. People walk by us, mostly ignoring, but a few offer curious glances.
My attention goes back to Gage, and he’s staring at me with absolutely no shutter over his expression. He stands open and vulnerable and ready to let me inside if I’ll be bold enough to take the first step.
He’s turned the tables, forcing me to work for this. I’ve been so stuck on why he wants to go through all this trouble with me, I’ve forgotten that he might need something too.
It’s all so new.
So scary.
And so thrilling, a surge of power and confidence emboldens me. I move into Gage and put one hand on his chest. The other I wrap around the back of his neck. While I go slightly to my tiptoes, I mostly pull him down to me.
Tilting my head, I straighten up the last bit, and I’m the first to press my lips to his.
To open my mouth.
To slide my tongue in against his as everything else in the world disappears. There’s only me and him and the connection between us.
Gage’s arms circle my back, pull me in close. The heat of his body simmers against mine as I relish his hard muscles, the smell of his bodywash, and the rumble of appreciation deep in his throat.
