Submissive's Journey (Masters of Blackstone Book 1), page 29
“What?”
“Abuse. Mental. Physical. Emotional. I believe she was his prisoner.”
“Jesus! No! She wasn’t. Julia has mental issues.” Maxwell explained, “She was his wife. My God, they rubbed elbows with the rich and famous. She lunched with Sunny and Skye Day, often. Don’t fall for her delusions.”
“Look, you’re entitled to your opinions, but I disagree with your assessment.”
“Actually, it’s her psychiatric diagnosis.”
“Well see, there’s the other problem. I’ve no faith in Dr. Merrill. Did you know she is using overwriting and antipsychotics as a treatment on Julia?”
Merrick gasped and Everett met his gaze with a nod.
Everett could tell Maxwell was beyond irritated, but never expected his threat, “If you didn’t hit it off and you’re pissed because she hasn’t been in the lifestyle in five years and she’s not as polished as she once was, just say you pass and I’ll match her up with another dominant.”
“The fuck you will! She’s mine, Maxwell. Say the words and then say them a few more times, because if you even so much as hint to her that I’m not the right one, Trevor won’t ever find all the pieces of you.”
“Christ! What has gotten into you, Everett?”
“Julia. Julia has gotten into me, she is under my skin, and I am her protector now since you can’t see the truth that’s been staring you in the face all these years.”
“She wasn’t abused. You’ve already made me regret calling you.”
“You’re right, Maxwell. Abused is too vanilla a word for what was done to Julia. I figured that much out without hearing all the details.” Everett read the note Merrick held up. I’LL HELP YOU DIG THE HOLE AND HIDE THE BODY. I’VE ALWAYS DISLIKED THAT POMPOUS ASS.
He met Merrick’s gaze and knew he was more serious than he wanted to believe he was. “Maxwell, you called me for help. Somewhere deep down inside you, there’s an inkling of doubt. Julia’s damaged. She didn’t get that way without help. You also know I have a lot of experience helping abused submissives find peace and forgiveness that allows them to remain in the lifestyle that once failed them. Why else would you have called me to Jasper’s graveside for a look at the woman? You knew then just as now, all was not right in that house. Maybe more so then, than now.”
When Maxwell didn’t comment one way or another, Everett wished he could see the man’s reactions to his words to know if he was getting through to him at all. “Abused submissives tend to subconsciously seek out a dominating partner, but without understanding themselves can end up with a bully or worse.”
He could hear Trevor speaking softly in the background before Maxwell finally admitted, “I’ll agree I knew Julia had experienced some trauma, but I deny bringing you to the funeral to take over a problem I didn’t want.”
In Everett’s mind, Maxwell’s denials were more telling than anything else said.
“I’ve never bought the reason you gave me for wanting me at that funeral. I believe even then, you recognized something was horribly wrong, if only on an intuitive level, but then the moment was upon you to turn her over and you felt guilt. You’ve been acting from a position of guilt ever since.” Everett held space for Maxwell to confess his share of the sin but he remained stubbornly quiet. “Look, the truth is probably uglier than either of us want to admit, but please say you agree that I’m good at what I do. You know she needs me, not someone else.”
His voice cracked emotionally when he asked, “Can you help her?”
“Yes, if she’ll come to me. She has to take the first step.”
“What can I do to encourage her? I destroyed her trust in me—”
“She still knows that you care for her and would never intentionally lead her wrongly. Yes, you damaged your relationship but she will heed your counsel. I left her a list of tasks she is to complete today. She’ll check-out sometime tomorrow. At some point she is going to call you and ask for your advice. You are going to be supportive of her spending her winter break with me.”
♥ ♥ ♥
Julia dried and wrapped in the fluffy hotel robe. “This fucker is definitely going home with me.” She gathered up the two wine glasses from the night before too. She washed and wrapped them carefully in the paper each piece of lingerie had been wrapped in. On the envelope she had yet to open she wrote:
Curse words – 1
Items stolen - 3
Pushing her feet into hotel provided spa shoes that were huge, she held the envelope and paced. ”Fuck this.”
She speed dialed Maxwell and while he might not want to talk to her, she was sure as hell going to talk to him or his voice mail. One way or another, he was getting an earful.
He didn’t pick up right away, and just when she started to panic the call really was going to voicemail, she heard Trevor’s voice, “Hi, Julia.”
“I spent the day with him and I think part of the night,” she confessed in a rush. “But now, he’s gone. I woke up alone…and he left an envelope. He said it has instructions.”
“Slow down! You aren’t making any sense.”
“I fucked Everett!”
“Yes. Yes. I got that part. That’s very good news, by the way. Congratulations—”
She heard sounds of protest and then Maxwell’s voice came over the line. “Julia?”
She supposed news that the dominant he’d set her up with abandoning her in a hotel had startled him out of his angry snit. “I don’t know what to do, Maxwell. There’s instructions…I fell asleep and now it may be too late!”
In his calming ‘don’t freak the fuck out yet Dom voice’, he asked, “Too late for what, love?”
She knew all his Dom voices and now was the time for none of them. She wouldn’t have it. He needed to be freaking out too! “To follow the instructions! You aren’t listening to me, Maxwell! At least Trevor was following along.” She dropped onto the edge of the bed, realizing how much it hurt to sit on the edge of the bed. She shifted, trying to get comfortable, pinching her poor, tender, bruised, over-used pussy parts. She squealed and stood. Holy Mother of God.
“I’m listening. You aren’t saying anything. What instructions?”
“Everett’s instructions! He left an envelope.”
Suddenly Trevor’s voice filled the space. “Ooooo, you mean Master/slave instructions? How exciting! What does he want you to do?”
Clearly she’d been switched to speaker phone. Maxwell commanded, “Speak, Julia.”
In the background she heard Trevor squeal. “I bet he wants her to do something really kinky like put a scouring pad in her bras or maybe wear vibrating panties to school so she’ll think about him all day while he’s away? What time is he coming back?”
“Maxwell, please take it off speaker and I’ll tell you everything.”
“Party pooper,” Trevor accused. She imagined him flouncing off. For a moment there was bickering then a click of a door and blessed silence. Maxwell explained, “I’m in my office. Tell me what he told you to do before he returns that has you so troubled.”
“No, no—you don’t understand. He took his suitcases. He left. I don’t know what time it was. The room was dark and I went back to sleep. I think things went well. Now, I have a massage scheduled for later and this envelope with additional instructions.”
She heard Maxwell take a deep breath. “Okay, first. Everett’s a busy man with a lot on his plate. Don’t panic. What time is your massage?”
“Four, so still a couple hours away.” Julia exhaled. Of course, busy man, just happens to jet in from Savannah for an overnight to meet me and then jet back out. That doesn’t happen in real life. Did Maxwell understand she was totally losing her shit? Maybe she needed to be clearer! “Tell me what to do, Maxwell!”
“Take a deep breath and plan to do exactly what he instructed.”
Nodding, Julia breathed deeply and felt some of her anxiety recede.
“Good. First, no more sleeping. Take a shower or soak in the tub. Don’t be late for your massage, and eat if you haven’t because he will hold you accountable to the steps he laid out.”
“Yes, I know that. I already soaked in a tub and ordered room service.”
“See? So far so good, now what else does it say in his instructions, love?”
“The note? The one in the envelope?”
“Yes, Julia.” She could tell by Maxwell’s tone, his patience was wearing thin. “You haven’t opened the envelope, have you?”
“Huh-uh.”
“Don’t you think you should open it?”
“Maybe?”
“Julia,” he said softly, cajoling, before demanding in his most firmly, controlling Dom voice, “Open the envelope. Now!”
She tore open the envelope and was too stunned to even communicate when she realized what she was looking at: a one-way ticket to Savannah and a scrawled note: Come to me when your winter break starts. I’ll be waiting.
“Julia? Julia?” Maxwell said her name twice, sounding impatient. How many times had he said her name?
“It’s a ticket, a ticket to Savannah…a fucking one-way ticket to Savannah,” she whispered, not able to completely get her voice past the fear whipping down her spine.
Maxwell admitted, “Well, I didn’t see that coming quite so soon, love, but it will be lovely to spend your holiday with him.”
“So, I should just get on the plane and go? No questions asked?”
Maxwell chuckled softly. He chuckled!
“Maxwell!” she shrilled. “Don’t laugh at me!”
“Sweetheart, I would never laugh at you. Why don’t the three of us eat after your massage? If you want, reserve a table at The Palace downstairs or if you’d prefer join us at Cronies’ for a beer and some stew. The owners are back in town. I’m sure they’d love to see you.”
Scowling, she said, “I don’t know the owners of Cronies.”
“Yes, you do. You might not remember the first time because it was the day we arrived in Cincinnati from California, but I’m certain you’ll remember their performance. I took you to see Gabe and Jonathon’s rope demo a few years ago when I thought perhaps shibari might interest you.”
She’d always thought knot work was beautiful, but she’d never understood how being bound could feel like being hugged until Everett had shown her.
“Ion,” Trevor said softly in the background. Julia wondered how long he’d listened to the one-sided conversation. She didn’t know the owners of the Irish bar well enough to know if Gabe having a new partner was significant or not. Wait, she’d heard something.
“Ah, yes,” Maxwell said lightly. “Apparently Jonathon had a midlife crisis and changed his name from Jonathon O’Donnell to Ion Džugi. I don’t understand, but then it’s not my place to. I only know him as Gabe’s rope bunny.”
Oh my god! That Gabe and Jonathon! Julia pressed her brow together, remembering bits and pieces from news reports. “Gabe married Alexandra Van Zant, the president’s science advisor, but the real scandal is her harem.”
“Harem?” Maxwell asked.
“Alexandra’s partners. Gabe, Ion, and Conor,” Trevor whispered in an excited squeal. “If they’re back in town we have to go to Cronies. I need to catch up on the gossip. Talk Julia into meeting us there.”
Julia rolled her eyes. “Trevor, you know I can hear you, right? I’ll reserve a table at The Palace for six thirty. You can both catch up on Cronies’ gossip some other time. Tonight’s focus is my identity crisis.”
♥ ♥ ♥
If Julia had ever been thankful for anything in her life, it was Everett’s foresight in arranging her massage. She was naked and covered in layers of heated damp blankets with only parts of her exposed at a time. The best part was the room being dark with only a small Himalayan salt lamp illuminating the room, so the technician couldn’t see her tears. When the woman’s hands started gliding over her oiled skin the floodgates opened. She couldn’t remember crying so much in years. Maxwell had reassured her repeatedly Everett meant only for her to come for winter break, and that she shouldn’t see the one-way ticket as threatening. Was it wrong, she did?
She had an entire weekend to recover and think, but really, what was there to think about? She would be insane to walk away from her life here. Completely insane.
But some small part inside her wanted nothing more in the world.
Four hours later Julia repeated that sentiment to her protector over a glass of wine at a linen covered table at The Palace. “He’s a complete stranger.”
Maxwell didn’t comment, not with words anyway. Taking her hand and holding her gaze, he pushed back her long sleeve just enough to trace the rough edges of rope burn gracing the inside of her wrist with his lips, pointing out the obvious without uttering a word. She’d trusted Everett enough to tie her up and leave her defenseless.
Just remembering Everett’s intensity, her panties grew wetter.
“Going to Savannah would be a risk to your heart”—Maxwell interrupted her thoughts —“but not dangerous. I don’t believe for a minute you’d be mistreated.”
Julia exhaled shakily, trying and failing to push back her need. “I just feel like we’re a bad match. His life is in Savannah, mine’s here. I could ask, what in the fuck were you thinking agreeing to introduce us? You know I just got accepted to a full time teaching position…and I love my job!”
“What was I thinking? Sweetheart, you are so amazing, any school in the nation would be excited to have you on staff and Everett Hawthorne is very charming, respected dominant in the community, who would treat you well.” Maxwell lifted his wine and took a long swallow. “If you’re here for my blessing, you have it.”
“Well, I’m not.”
“So, when do you leave for Savannah?” Trevor wrapped around her from behind and kissed her cheek. “So sorry I’m late, tell me you ordered dinner.”
“About time you got here,” Maxwell grumbled, looking over his shoulder at his partner. “Julia insisted we wait for you to order.”
“I’m the nice one, you’d be wise to remember that. I don’t take her love for granted like some people.” Julia turned her head, laughing behind her lifted glass, but Maxwell caught her wrist and pulled her hand down, challenging, “Tell him.”
“I just explained to Maxwell; we’re a mismatch. I’m not going to Savannah.”
“Oh, you’re going…it’s in your eyes…and in your naughty smile,” Trevor squeezed her tighter, angling his head over her shoulder to meet her gaze. “We wouldn’t have introduced you if we didn’t think you’d be a good match for each other. The least you can do is go for a visit. I know you can afford a return flight.”
I can. I’m not a helpless child anymore. I owe it to myself to take a peek. Closing her eyes, Julia sipped and swallowed, pushing back the wave of emotion now that the decision was made once and for all. Excitement made her heart speed up. She felt giddy.
When’s the earliest I could leave? Fuck, I’m really gonna do it!
Sipping and swallowing again, she reveled in the cool, refreshing liquid sliding down her throat. “Wow. This is really good.”
Trevor lifted his own glass. “Everything is better the day after an intense scene.”
“Yes. You’re right of course.” She smiled, blushing. “I need to feel this way more often. I mean, I woke up hurting, but I felt alive, you know? Really alive.”
Maxwell covered her hand with his. “I know, lovey. It’s good to see color in your cheeks again. I was worried.”
“No need to worry.” She winked. “I’m fine.”
Trevor touched her chin, turning her head so that she was facing him, then pushed her bangs away from her eyes. He leaned his forehead against hers. “Go take a peek?”
“A peek at what might be possible. I can’t risk fantasizing about anything more.”
Maxwell squeezed her hand. “I’m pleased. Everett needs you, and in truth, you need Everett. I have no doubt you’d be as happy teaching in Savannah as Cincinnati if you decide you can make a life there with him.”
“Let’s not go crazy. A peek doesn’t equal a life, a few screaming orgasms, no more.”
Trevor pretended to take notes. “Wait, wait, I’m documenting this moment of colossal life changing event in motion that you refuse to see avalanching your way. Would you classify a few screaming orgasms as three or four?”
Maxwell held his cell out to her. “You can call him now. He’s waiting to hear from you.”
“What?” Looking at the faceplate of his phone, Julia saw he’d already dialed the number and it was ringing. She ended the call. “Oh no! I’m not ready to talk to him!”
Maxwell’s phone vibrated on the tabletop, leaving the three of them looking at it. Maxwell didn’t answer it and Julia wasn’t about to. “Answer it, Julia.”
Hesitantly, she reached for the phone. “Hello?”
“Well, hello. I was expecting Maxwell.”
“You can talk to him if you’d rather,” she said smartly, earning a sharp glance and an even sharper elbow from Maxwell. She moaned from the contact.
“No!” he said loudly and sternly, and then more softly, “I want to hear your voice, little dragon. I’ve kicked myself a hundred times for leaving you alone in that hotel room.”
She left her chair, cupping her hand around the receiver as she walked away from the table. Very softly she admitted, “That’s good, because I really wanted to hear your voice, Everett.”
Turning toward her friends, she smiled at Maxwell and mouthed “thank you” before leaving the restaurant to find a private corner in the hotel’s lobby. Happiness filled her chest, as certainty going to Savannah was absolutely the right thing to do bolstered her mood.
“How are the rope burns on your wrists?”
“Dry, not red.”
“Good. How’s the rest of you?”
She started crying softly.
Wishing you were here.
Achy in all the best places.
Lonelier than I’ve been in five years.
“I’m okay,” she whispered finally, but her heart raced with fear. She knew how desperate she was and Maxwell only pointed out the obvious. She was very good at mucking things up. This was why she hadn’t fantasized about what-ifs. She was already too attached to the idea of Everett being her dominant. What if it doesn’t work out?
