Lycan Legacy (A Soulmark Series Book 5), page 2
I keep the warmth to my smile even though inside I cringe. Not going to college had been... difficult. Yet, bound to the will of my alphas, I couldn't disobey their orders to remain and put my efforts into what they deemed to be of the utmost importance—the pack.
"The library and internet are a powerful combination," I say at last. They most certainly had been. I force down the resentment that ignited in my belly at the reminder. The library became my refuge. My childhood fascination with plants turned into a more studious pastime to fill the void of the higher education I was denied.
I clear my throat, the sound a gentle rumble, and pin June with a playful squinting of my eyes. "But back to your dream wedding... a certain Toby Jensen wouldn't happen to be the one you picture waiting for you at the end of the aisle, would it?"
June lets out a high-pitched squeal and grabs the nearest pillow to throw at me. I delight in the rush of color that floods her cheeks. "Winter Blanc!" she shouts as if the scandalized tone will bring me to heel. I laugh merrily instead.
"Don't tell me he's not. I thought you two were madly and deeply in love."
June's rosy cheeks deepen to crimson. "Toby and I aren't like you and Atticus, Winter. We're not soulmarks."
"No, you're not. But you and Toby aren't like the rest of the couples in the pack. You're genuinely in love. So many of our pack mates are together through arranged circumstances. You're lucky your parents and his approve of your relationship."
Her shoulders drop from their stilted position, but her blush only recedes a quarter. A sense of hope pervades me as I think of my cousin's relationship with her boyfriend. They make being in love look easy. And although they are young, ages seventeen and nineteen, their relationship is far more mature than several others in the pack.
It lightens my heart to know she will be in Toby's safe care once I leave for Montana.
Thoughts of the American state raise my heartbeat, or rather, ideas of Atticus do. Our matching marks, three intertwined rings, were discovered when we were children at a great meeting of the North American packs. As fate would have it, Atticus accidentally touched the soulmark still forming on my lower back as he valiantly helped me pilfer a box of cookies.
The box of cookies my small, five-year-old hands strove for had been far out of reach. Heedless of the difficult task, I stretched to the very tips of my toes. As a by-product of my determination, my shirt had ridden up in my efforts. A gentleman, even at age eight, Atticus had attempted to assist my cookie heist and inadvertently touched my soulmark while giving me a much-needed boost.
The moment was electric. Literally.
He dropped me in shock, wide-eyed and shaking. I succumbed to tears of confusion and a small bit of pain from my landing.
It was a match made in heaven.
I duck my head to hide my smile. My interaction henceforth with my soulmark was conducted via letters and heavily monitored by my family. In rare occurrences did we speak over the phone. We certainly never saw each other. Secret social media stalking was my only means to garner a glimpse into Atticus Hayes’s life. That, and the short secret messages we embed in our letters to each other.
They are trivial phrases snuck into boring paragraphs that express our excitement to be with one another and clue the other in to the more meaningful details of our life. Our secret code took years to get right, but the painstaking effort was worth it. I can't speak of Atticus's experience throughout our exchange, but our letters have always been subject to my parents' disapproving eyes. Having the means to express myself without the threat of my parents' censorship was everything.
If our discovery had taken place anywhere else, my parents would have whisked me away to some tower and kept me hidden—along with their secrets—for the rest of my life. I shudder at the thought.
At the time, I could not comprehend the soulmark curse upon my family. Why was it bad? Why did they look so ill whenever I expressed my joy and excitement? Five-year-old Winter did not understand their disdain and anger. Nor could six-year-old Winter, but at age seven, my parents made sure I did.
The soulmark is a weakness to the Blanc pack, for it does not bolster us as it did the other packs spread out across the world. It is a curse, they had explained, for the purpose of marriage is to procreate, and we cannot with our soulmarks—souls bound or otherwise. If those outside the pack knew of our weakness, they would surely take advantage, and the Blanc pack would come under attack.
They told me those who truly understood the importance of the pack's survival proudly did as our ancestors and removed the cursed mark from their skin in solidarity with the pack. That I, the daughter of the alphas, would forsake this privilege to prove my commitment to the pack was a grave disappointment.
As those who do forsake the pack in such a way are met with sometimes fatal unkindness.
To show my solidarity with the Blanc pack's plight, I am not to bind my soul with Atticus... regardless of our impending union. This is to be my concession to alleviate their disappointment.
The thought makes me ill.
Tomorrow I leave for Montana with a dozen or so of my pack. And the following day I will be Mrs. Winter Hayes. My heart gives a nervous flutter.
"Our parents are okay with it now, Winter, but they aren't the ones who need to approve it. You and I both know that," she ends with a small, rebuking voice.
I hold back a grimace. "Haven't you heard?" I ask playfully. "I have an in with the alphas. If Toby is the one you want, I'll put in all the requisite good words needed to make it happen."
June tries for a smile. "I trust in your capabilities of persuasion when it comes to Uncle Malcolm, but Aunt Adele is another matter."
"My mother is a staunch supporter of having the best... so just make sure Toby can prove he treats you the best, and you'll be golden, kid." June frowns as I lean forward and punch her in the arm.
"I'm not a kid. I'm seventeen."
"Well, I'm twenty-five, so to me, you'll always be a kid."
June rolls her eyes but then softens.
"You'll really put in a good word for Toby with your parents? I mean, we don't plan on getting married tomorrow or anything"—June laughs a touch hysterically —"but knowing he's got their approval will go a long way for us."
"Have I ever let you down before?"
I'm tackled into the hard couch cushions, June's squeal of excitement nearly bursting my eardrum. "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!" Hauling her off is a more difficult task than I anticipated, but somehow, I manage through a storm of thunderous laughter passed between us. "Oh, Winter, I wish you weren't going. I'm going to miss you."
A lump forms in my throat. "We can talk as frequently as you want. I'm only a text or call away, okay?"
June bops her head up and down happily.
"You know who might end up missing you more than me?"
My eyes widen as I take in a steadying breath. "Don't say—"
"Knox!"
I release a groan. Knox Bernard does not approve of my marriage or soulmark with Atticus. He's been one of its most vocal opponents throughout the past few years. Worse are his demands that I go through the same soulmark removal process as the rest of the pack, even though a betrothal contract was signed a long time ago with the Hayeses.
"He'll get over it," I tell her dryly. There are few things I envision missing about home, and Knox doesn't make the list.
Silence overtakes the small space between us, and my thoughts drift to the new pack I'll be joining, the Adolphus pack. How different will they be from mine? And what exactly does it mean to be a "new age" pack and leave tradition behind? I smooth my features into something serene as a pit of doubt begins to well in my stomach.
Mother and father have nothing nice to say about the Adolphus pack, and our chance meeting with Irina Adolphus at the Celestial Court did little to change that opinion. They insist her pack is no good. Impulsive. Dangerous. Feral. Mother frets over my survival among them, for I possess none of those qualities. My upbringing ensured me to be a groomed, well-behaved woman, docile yet amiable enough to sway decisions.
"There you are!" My mother's voice rings throughout the guest powder room with shrill exasperation. "It's almost six o'clock, Winter," she reprimands me as she marches into the room, her heels clicking like stakes against the floor. I stand with grace endowed to me through years of training, and June follows suit with far fewer airs of polite society about her.
"Hello, Aunt Adele."
My mother dons a patronizing smile as she stares down her niece. "Shouldn't you be home doing homework?"
"It's winter break!" June announces. "And—"
My mother's hand is in the air, palm thrust forward before June can prattle on. "Go home, Juniper. Don't keep your mother and father worrying about your whereabouts."
June doesn't lose her smile as she envelops me with a brief hug. "I love you," she blurts out. "Your wedding will be beautiful! I can't wait to see all the pictures and go over every detail, Winter. Bye! Bye, Aunt Adele."
A cheery wave is delivered before she exits the powder room, but I am the only one to return it.
"Sit, Winter." I do so and prepare myself for one of her lectures as she remains standing. "It's important we discuss a few... private matters regarding your marriage."
The implication of her words drives a flush of red to my cheeks, and I deftly avoid her steely gaze.
"That's really not necessary, Mother."
"Oh, Winter!" Her voice echoes her mild embarrassment, and immediately I realize I have misinterpreted her words—a scenario I attempt to avoid at all costs. "You're twenty-five for heaven's sake. I'm well aware of certain... private activities you participated in. Though, while on the topic, you should do well to avoid those scenarios with your soon-to-be husband. Interested parties might take offense later should your marriage to that man become null and void."
A prickle of doubt crawls across my skin. "Interested parties" referred to Knox Bernard. To my parents, he is the perfect suitor for me.
"Forgive me," I say with a demure air. "I misunderstood."
"That much is clear, Winter." She barely contains a scoff. "The matter I wish to speak to you about is one we have discussed before. But one who marries outside the pack can never be reminded too often, lest they end up like the Maces, Parishs, or Steinbecks."
A cold thrill runs down my back at the mention of the families who have chosen to leave the Blanc pack over the last decade. Since they had nothing nice to say about our pack upon their departure, their ability to speak further had been removed.
"I assure you I'm aware of the consequences of such actions." The words are spoken quietly as I look past June to the bay window at the end of the room. Snow falls peacefully outside. The soft, white crystals drift down at their own leisure and blanket our property. "I won't say anything about the soulmark curse."
"And...." The slight chill about the room is nothing compared to the arctic tenor of her voice. The hope I attempt to keep safe in my heart for better tomorrows trembles.
"And I won't let him complete the soulmark," I answer.
My mother makes what she considers a pleased noise. It is the cross between a purr and a growl and does little in the way of reassurance.
"Excellent. You must realize, Winter, the Adolphus pack is destined for doom. These 'new-age' packs are too erratic. They have nothing to keep them balanced and structured, and that's what we more traditional packs have in spades." She tsks and stands in one fluid act, then strides to the window. "If the Adolphus pack loses their squabble with the Wselfwulf pack, I don't want my daughter tied down to a wolf who cannot appreciate our set of values. Your father and I only want what is best for you, Winter."
Knox surfaces again in my thoughts. His hawk-like eyes and sharp jaw conjure in my mind. Even there their intensity is unnerving. Knox doesn't so much want me, as he does the prestige that comes with marrying the last member of the Blanc line. It doesn't hurt that his courting efforts are accompanied by a sizeable inheritance in tow—an inheritance he garnered through suspicious means.
How can my parents want me to be with a wolf whose loyalties lay first and foremost with his own self-interest? They might doubt my ability to survive among the Adolphus pack, but I know I cannot endure a life alongside Knox Bernard.
"Are you even listening to me?"
I gulp, and I'm unable to hide my startled expression fast enough for my mother's eyes. "Of course," I reply, turning my expression into one of shocked disbelief. "You were reminding me of the importance of keeping our other pack secret. About the true origins of the lycan curse." Mother's chin thrusts high into the air. "I won't speak of the lycan curse to the Adolphus pack, Mother. If brought up, I'm well versed in directing the conversation in another direction. I would never confirm the curse's origin to our pack."
For a moment, I wonder if I have guessed incorrectly, and a knot of worry winds itself around my stomach. Could I be wrong? Mother always follows her reminder of the soulmark curse with that of the lycan curse.
"You do have an affinity for stretching the truth," she concedes. Her chin lowers, and her eyes become hooded as she studies my reaction. I know better than to react to her words, but the small slight still stings.
"I'm loyal to the pack, Mother. Above all else."
A hint of approval dashes across her face in the small twitch near the corner of her mouth. But this is not the type of approval that leaves me reassured. Instead, the knot in my stomach tightens like a snake ready to devour its prey.
"And here I had my doubts these last few months. I'm so pleased you say this, Winter. Your father and I have spoken at length about this arrangement of yours and have agreed upon a way to use it to our advantage."
My cool facade finally breaks, a frown creasing the skin between my brows. "The advantage is being able to call the Adolphus pack our allies through this marriage. They'll help in whatever future qualms we may have—"
"Don't be so naive, Winter," my mother interrupts. "The association of our pack with theirs is a sully to our name. To request any type of aid from them is unthinkable."
I stay silent a moment, collecting myself as best I can. "Then what advantage do you speak of?"
"This war of theirs is not beneficial to the lycan community. It's causing too many waves and needs to be settled with haste." Mother turns her back to me, staring out into the night. Her reflection is stony in the glass windowpane. I attempt to garner her true emotions through the pack bonds, but they are unreadable to me, as per usual.
"What will you have me do? Mediate the situation?"
My innocent question draws an uncouth bark of laughter from my mother. I shrink back into the couch in response.
"Mediate the situation?" Her laughter slowly dies down, and she faces me. The stony expression is swept away in favor of one of pure condescension. "Oh, Winter, don't be ridiculous. Anyone with eyes can see a resolution between the two packs by mediation is out of the question. The only way their feud will end is with blood, and whoever claims the most will be the winner."
"What do you want me to do?" I ask, my words turning colder. My mother's expression remains the same.
"This need for bloodshed needs to come to a head. Sooner rather than later."
"And you want me to instigate the fight?"
My mother rolls her eyes. "Nothing so dramatic as that, Winter. Honestly, girl. We only wish for you to keep us updated on the goings on of the Adolphus pack. What their thoughts and plans are for their confrontation with the Wselfwulf pack."
"You want me to spy on them?" I ask. My question is delivered with quiet restraint.
"I want you to do as your father and I command, as a good daughter should, not ask meaningless questions," she responds. The alpha in her voice makes my wolf bend in submission, and without thought, I stretch my neck to the side in a silent offering. "You must understand, Winter, that you are in a unique position. Without completing the necessary elements of the soulmark binding, you will never entirely leave the Blanc pack, not under my careful watch.
"And though your union to that man will tie you a certain degree to the Adolphus pack, you will likewise never be completely part of their pack. I don't want you to think of this business as spying. Think of it as proving your loyalty to the Blanc pack. Perhaps we should not have shielded you as we did from the rougher aspects of pack life. I wonder how you will survive among those savages. Even for this brief period of time," she says.
Shielded? What utter nonsense. My loyalty to the pack was ensured through persuasive hands and fits along with verbal lashings until I learned my place as their daughter: to be sometimes seen and never heard.
I suck in a harsh breath that my mother ignores. Really, I shouldn't be surprised at the request, and yet I am. Mother has always enjoyed testing our pack mates’ loyalties, why not her daughter's as well? I dare not think of what consequences might occur should I fail, for I learned long ago the pain it could wreak went beyond the physical.
"Don't think too hard on it, Winter, dearest. You'll get wrinkles, and we can't have you spoiling that lovely face of yours," she chides before striding out of the room. "And remember, there are more players in this game than you realize. Should you disappoint us, there will be others who face the consequences of your actions."
By the Moon
Chapter 2
It's undoubtedly quieter without June's running commentary whispering in my ear as we fly to Montana. The journey is many things without a true friend or ally nearby.
Bittersweet.
Somber.
Stark.
How I manage without her shine is a remarkable feat. The pack mates who accompany me are not the liveliest of peoples. Worse still, my only bridesmaids are my cousins Lucy and Jessica. They're a vicious duo who are equally cruel apart.
My mother has three sisters, Cora, Jules, and Margaret—but only two if you were to ask her. Aunt Cora is mother to Lucy and Jessica and holds the rank of third she-wolf. Aunt Margaret is June's mother. Her rank fluctuates near the bottom of the top ten she-wolves. It is a fact that constantly makes my mother and Aunt Cora cringe. As for Aunt Jules, she left the pack without a word to be with her soulmark. Nobody discovered her departure until days after the fact.
