Ex in the City, page 14
I head to the main hall, where the stage is, and where Dylan said they were holding the auditions today. I told him I would catch him up, as I wanted to arrange some interviews for him – getting him the right press in the right places right now is crucial, with the reunion tour announcement on the horizon. I frown to myself, as I wonder what Rebecca might be up to, but the thoughts are quickly pushed from my mind as I finally enter the hall.
I hear the music first, the familiar tune of ‘Fat Sam’s Grand Slam’. I’m pleasantly taken aback when I realise it is Dylan up on the stage singing – I’m even more surprised when I hear that he’s singing the female parts too, making his voice super squeaky for his audience. He looks like he’s having a blast, like he isn’t just performing for the kids, he’s one of them.
The kids are completely captivated. They laugh at Dylan’s onstage antics and mimic his playful dance moves. His enthusiasm is clearly infectious. I can’t help but bob along to the music too, smiling as I watch him up there doing his thing.
Dylan takes his final bow, and the applause and cheers from the children roar through the hall. He grins, acknowledging their cheers, like the natural-born performer that he is.
‘Okay, Miss Pallett, dancers,’ he says, addressing a petite blonde teacher and her group of excited teenage girls. ‘That’s the song I want you to work on a routine for.’
‘We’ll get right on it,’ Miss Pallett replies with a gleeful nod and – of course – a flirtatious smile.
Dylan’s attention shifts to the rest of the room.
‘Now, who is the naughtiest boy?’ he asks, a mischievous glint in his eyes. ‘Be brave, point him out.’
Laughter and chatter fill the hall as every finger in the room points toward the same boy, who somehow just looks like he would be the class clown. He stands up with a proud smirk.
‘What’s your name, kid?’ Dylan enquires.
‘Calvin Conley,’ the boy replies confidently.
‘Not any more,’ Dylan tells him. ‘From now on, you’re Fat Sam. Apparently, that’s how they cast the movie, so that’s how we’ll do it.’
Everyone laughs, and Calvin – or should I say Fat Sam – celebrates with a bit of a victory dance.
‘Assuming you’re any good, though,’ Dylan quickly adds with a wink. ‘Anyone who wants a big part, stand over on that side of the room. One at a time, we’ll have you sing a few lines, and we’ll see who is best placed for each part.’
I love how naturally Dylan handles the children, bringing out their enthusiasm and creativity. I didn’t know he was good at anything, apart from music, but he seems like a born teacher, as well as an entertainer, and the kids clearly adore him already.
Dylan’s eyes meet mine from the stage, and his smile lights up the room. He quickly hops down from the stage and makes his way over to me, wrapping me in a warm hug.
‘Okay, this is seriously fun,’ he tells me, as though I might not have realised either. ‘Honestly, I’m so excited about this musical. Come on, sit down with me, help me audition the kids.’
I can’t help but laugh at his enthusiasm.
‘Okay,’ I reply with a smile. ‘We’ll be like Simon and Sharon.’
Dylan’s forehead furrows in confusion.
‘Who?’ he asks.
‘I was just making a noughties X Factor reference,’ I say with a laugh, batting it away with my hand.
‘You watched The X Factor?’ he replies in disbelief.
‘I was a music journalist,’ I remind him.
‘Exactly,’ he replies with a playful roll of his eyes.
Dylan takes his seat behind the audition table. I join him, and while I’m not sure what someone with minimal musical talents like me can offer, I am kind of looking forward to getting involved.
As the auditions crack on, we watch each kid take the stage one by one, and show us what they can do. Dylan is an absolute natural with them, encouraging every single one and offering compliments, no matter what kind of performance they put in. He scribbles notes on his pad, pencilling different kids in for various characters. He really is enjoying this.
A blonde teenage girl confidently steps onto the stage.
‘Hi, my name is Ellie Pallett,’ she announces. ‘And I’ll be auditioning for the part of Tallulah.’
‘Pallett?’ Dylan replies, his eyes flicking over to the dance teacher, Miss Pallett. ‘Any relation?’
‘Yeah, she’s my mum,’ Ellie tells him, giving her mum a wave.
Dylan playfully drops his jaw.
‘Well, that doesn’t make any sense,’ he teases. ‘Something isn’t adding up here.’
‘Oh, stop,’ Miss Pallett insists with a bat of her hand, but you can tell she’s loving it. Attention from Dylan is a special thing, it makes you feel like the most important person on the planet – when you have it. When you lose it, it’s like coming off a drug.
‘So, Ellie, who do you look up to musically?’ Dylan asks her.
‘Tay Magenta,’ she says quickly and certainly. ‘I want to be a pop star just like her.’
‘Okay, Ellie, who can’t be more than four years old based on how her mum looks,’ Dylan jokes. ‘Go for it.’
I join the laughter with everyone else, though I can’t help but feel a tingle of something that is not jealousy… but it’s close.
As Ellie sings, she shows that she is as talented as she is confident. She has a great voice and the kind of stage presence that is essential for playing Tallulah.
‘Okay, wow,’ Dylan praises as he jots down notes. ‘Absolutely fantastic, Ellie. Good work.’
We sit through the rest of the auditions, pretty much finishing up as the bell rings for break time.
‘Great work, everyone,’ Dylan calls out. ‘Someone will let you know when the next one is.’
The kids disperse, their excited chatter filling the room as they go.
‘Who is that?’ I ask Dylan, nodding towards a small, shy-looking boy who is lingering near the stage.
‘You okay, bud?’ Dylan asks him, approaching him slowly. ‘Didn’t fancy auditioning for a big part?’
The kid shifts on his feet, remaining silent.
‘What’s your name?’ Dylan asks, a warm smile on his face.
‘Joey Pallett,’ the boy replies.
‘Ah,’ Dylan says simply. ‘Joey Pallett of the super-talented Pallett family?’
Joey nods in acknowledgement.
‘I’ll tell you what, it’s just me and Nicole listening. Why don’t you sing for us?’ Dylan suggests. ‘I know I’m great, but Nicole can’t sing a note, so you can’t be as bad as her.’
I laugh. Joey does too.
‘Are you really bad?’ he asks me.
You know what, I probably am.
‘Terrible,’ I reply. ‘Show me how it’s done.’
Joey seems unsure at first but he eventually agrees. As he starts singing, his nervousness gradually gives way to a beautiful voice, one that that fills the room.
‘You’ve got a great voice, bud,’ Dylan compliments him. ‘Honestly, one of the best. You should have a lead part.’
Joey’s eyes widen with horror.
‘What does your mum think?’ Dylan asks him.
Joey just shrugs. My heart breaks for him, it must be tricky, having such a confident sister, and being talented yourself but so unsure about it.
Dylan moves to sit on the floor, crossing his legs and patting the space next to him, inviting Joey to join him.
‘Do you want to hear a story, about when I was younger?’ Dylan asks.
Joey nods, his curiosity piqued.
‘So, I have a brother called Mikey, who started classical guitar lessons when he was, like, six – really young,’ Dylan begins. ‘He was really good, even from a young age, and he only got better as he got older. My mum and dad thought he was brilliant, so they wanted to do everything they could to help him. And it made me feel like they spent all of their time and their resources on him, and that they weren’t really bothered about me.’
It’s funny how, even when you know everything worked out for the best, it can still break your heart to see the sad look on a person’s face when they talk about their past.
He’s playing it down, because he is telling the story to a young teen, but Dylan’s parents really did push him aside for perfect Mikey. And it’s not that Mikey wasn’t talented, or didn’t deserve it, but Dylan deserved some attention too, not being left to his own devices, inevitably getting himself in trouble, starting to drink and smoke at an early age – I often wonder if that’s where his problems with drinking originated, using it to escape when he was a teen.
‘So I did what kids do,’ Dylan continues. ‘I acted up, I was disruptive at school, because if I couldn’t be the really good kid, then maybe I could excel at being the really bad one – I don’t recommend that, by the way.’
Joey laughs.
‘Anyway, one night, when I wasn’t much older than you, we went out for my auntie’s birthday, to the pub,’ he continues his story. ‘I was bored, there were no fit girls there, and I wasn’t allowed a dr…’ Dylan’s voice trails off briefly, as he rethinks endorsing underage drinking.
‘Basically, there was nothing fun to do,’ he says instead. ‘But then the DJ started taking karaoke requests. You know the song from The Lion King, the Elton John one?’
Dylan sings a little bit of ‘Can You Feel the Love Tonight’ and Joey nods in recognition.
‘Yeah, I sang that,’ Dylan continues. I give him a reassuring smile to show my support. ‘I don’t, er, I don’t think anyone knew I could sing. My mum was sobbing, my old man looked like he was going to cry too. I had the room, every single person, all eyes on me. I didn’t even know I wanted to be a singer until that night, and then I couldn’t imagine ever doing anything else.’
Joey listens intently, captivated by Dylan’s story, obviously seeing similarities with his own life. I know it was hard for Dylan, growing up in his brother’s shadow, which is probably why he was so willing to be the frontman of the band, singing, leaving the writing and playing to Mikey, letting him take the credit.
‘The reason I’m telling you this,’ Dylan concludes, ‘is because I know how hard it is when you have a sibling who finds it easier to step forward.’
Joey’s shoulders slump again.
‘My sister doesn’t even like me,’ he tells us. ‘She doesn’t think I’m cool – no one does. It’s my birthday today, and I’m having a party tonight, and she says she won’t come because no one else is going to come, because I’m a loser.’
I notice Dylan’s facial features tighten.
‘That’s not very nice,’ he remarks, shaking his head.
Miss Pallett joins us.
‘Teenage girls,’ she says with a sigh. ‘I’m trying to get her to be nicer.’
‘Miss Pallett, you have two talented kids, it turns out,’ Dylan says, lightening the mood.
‘Please, call me Jessica,’ she insists, an unmistakable hint of flirtation in her voice.
Oh, boy, here we go again.
‘And we’re hoping some people will turn up to the party, aren’t we, Joey?’ Jessica says, rubbing her son’s shoulder.
‘Can I come?’ Dylan asks like it’s the most normal thing in the world.
Joey’s eyes widen. So do Jessica’s, to be honest.
‘Really?’ Joey squeaks with delight. ‘You would come to my party?’
Dylan nods with a friendly smile.
‘Of course,’ he replies. ‘Can I bring a friend?’
Joey turns to Jessica.
‘Mum, can Dylan come to my party, and can he bring a friend?’ he asks her.
I can’t help but laugh at how funny it sounds, Joey asking his mum if his new friend can come over.
‘Dylan can bring anyone he likes,’ Jessica tells him. ‘In fact, Dylan, if you give me your number, I can send you the details.’
Oh, smooth. So nicely done.
Dylan promptly hands her his phone – a little too promptly, maybe – and Jessica keys in her name and number.
Once Jessica and Joey head off, it’s just me and Dylan.
‘I can’t believe you’re going to a teenager’s birthday party later,’ I tease him.
‘We’re going to a teenager’s birthday party,’ he corrects me with a chuckle. ‘You didn’t think I’d go without you, did you?’
I laugh and roll my eyes in mock exasperation.
‘Oh, great,’ I say sarcastically. ‘Can’t wait.’
But, now that I think about it, is it weird that I can’t?
24
Standing in the village hall, with Dylan, at a teenage boy’s birthday party was not something I ever thought would happen this year – or ever.
It’s certainly not one of our usual haunts, or our usual crowds, but here we are.
Joey’s mum, Jessica, has gone all out, renting the village hall but, heartbreakingly, there are only five other kids here. There’s a DJ playing music and the disco lights are on but no one is home – well they are all quite literally at home, that’s the problem.
I lean in close to Dylan because, even over the music, in an otherwise empty room I worry my voice will carry.
‘This is so sad,’ I say softly. ‘I can’t believe Ellie hasn’t even shown up. She’s his sister, and she’s popular – she could’ve packed this place with kids if she wanted to.’
‘Kids can be cruel to each other, but hopefully, they grow out of it,’ he replies. ‘In the meantime, I’m determined to make sure Joey has a good birthday.’
Jessica and Joey make their way over to us.
‘Thanks so much for coming,’ Jessica tells us both, before turning to Dylan. ‘This is probably the quietest party you’ve ever been to, I’ll bet?’
‘Back in the day is a different story,’ Dylan replies. ‘But these days no one invites me to their parties, so thanks for letting me come.’
Dylan gives Joey an encouraging smile.
Jessica, not wasting an opportunity to flirt, tilts her head.
‘Speaking of back in the day, I would love to hear your stories sometime,’ she says. ‘Even if it has to be away from little ears.’
‘Mum, I’m fourteen,’ Joey reminds her with a groan.
Yeah, unfortunately, I know what she’s suggesting too.
Dylan, always the gentleman (these days, at least), nods and maintains a friendly tone.
‘I’ve probably forgotten any stories worth telling,’ he replies. ‘But I’ll bet Nicole can tell you a few.’
Jessica isn’t interested in what I have to say. She flashes me the briefest of smiles before turning her attention back to Dylan.
‘Well, I’d still love to hear it from the horse’s mouth,’ she continues. ‘And we were wondering if you might sing tonight. I would love to see you up there, doing your thing – we both would.’
She quickly adds on those last few words, I’d imagine to offset the flirty-sounding voice she said the bit before in.
‘Usually, I would love to,’ Dylan replies. ‘But I made a promise to my friend that she could sing tonight.’
‘But Dylan, you said Nicole can’t sing,’ Joey points out.
Fantastic to be reminded of that fact again.
‘Oh, no, she can’t,’ Dylan agrees with a shudder. ‘I was talking about my other friend.’
Before the conversation can go any further, a bulked-up figure in a black suit walks into the village hall, towering above the few kids that are here, terrifying pretty much all of them.
‘He’s singing?’ Joey asks, even more confused now.
Dylan grins and nods towards the door.
‘No, she is,’ he replies.
My jaw drops with everyone else as we witness the unexpected and unbelievable arrival of pop superstar Tay Magenta. She struts in, dazzling in a glitzy pink catsuit, her pink hair cascading in bouncy curls that have a life of their own. It’s amazing how she can walk through a village hall the same way she walked the catwalk during Fashion Week, and still look just as flawless.
‘Happy birthday, Joey,’ Tay chirps, approaching the birthday boy, who can only manage to gawp at her in awe.
Dylan doesn’t miss a beat, stepping in to greet her with a hug and a couple of showbiz air kisses.
‘Tay, hi. Thanks for coming,’ he says.
‘No problem,’ Tay says. She turns to Joey. ‘Dylan said I could come to your party, thanks for inviting me.’
As Joey and Jessica begin chatting with Tay, I turn to Dylan, completely gobsmacked.
‘Tay Magenta is a friend of yours?’ I say in disbelief. ‘And you got her to come to a kids’ party?’
‘Sometimes I think you forget I’m Dylan King,’ he replies. ‘Not to hit you with a “don’t you know who I am” – but do you remember, for your birthday, when I hired out that science museum you love, just for the two of us to walk around, and you couldn’t understand how I’d blagged it?’
I laugh. It was a museum I used to visit as a kid, full of interactive things for kids to do, to learn all about all areas of science – but, crucially, it was for kids. One of the most depressing things about growing up is realising that, one day, you’re not allowed to visit one of your favourite places any more. So Dylan – being Dylan – got them to open it for a night, for my birthday, and we spent hours in there, just the two of us, having a laugh, playing with all the exhibitions.
‘Fair enough,’ I reply.
‘To answer your questions, yes, she’s a friend of mine,’ he explains. ‘And she owed me a favour, so she was happy to do it.’
My inner curiosity nags at me, but I decide to let it go. After all, this is an incredibly kind gesture. It doesn’t matter what Dylan did to make it happen.
‘I can’t stay too long, unfortunately, but I thought I could sing a couple of songs if you’d like?’ Tay tells Joey.
Joey, for the first time today, is beaming with confidence.
‘Yes, please!’ he replies.
Tay grins back at him.
‘I’ll go set up,’ she says.
Jessica’s gratitude could not be more apparent as she throws herself at Dylan and plants a lingering kiss on his cheek.
‘Now, see, all the kids that didn’t come are going to miss out on this,’ Jessica tells Joey. ‘And they’re going to think twice about the choices they make in the future.’
