Chapter 3

  As a consequence of Elizabeth’s harsh rejection of his marriage proposal, Darcy had promised himself that he would be a better man than the one who had stood before her some months ago with every expectation of a favorable reply.

  Blind and self-important best described his character at the time. Blind to the very real fact that Elizabeth did not care for him and self-important to the extent of presuming she possibly could care.

  “And those are the words of a gentleman.”

  How Elizabeth’s assertion had struck him to his very core, for if he were not the consummate gentleman, then what was he?

  Darcy was not immune to the irony that had Elizabeth accepted him as he presented himself to her that evening at the parsonage, she might very well have done so not because she suffered the same ardent love for him as he did for her, but rather because it was the most prudent thing to do for a young woman–any young woman regardless of her station in life.

  He had allowed his own wealth and station in life to cause him to think meanly of those whom he considered beneath him in consequence, and his behavior toward Elizabeth and her family had found him wanting.

  Meeting Elizabeth at Pemberley, of all places on earth, had not been something he had expected, but it was precisely what he needed.

  Surely our meeting for the first time since I gave her the letter in the grove at Rosings is not merely a coincidence. Surely it is more than a lucky chance. I have to believe her being here is meant to be.

  Darcy gave his walking companion a sidelong glance. He recalled their having walked along beside each other so many times before about the lanes at Rosings Park, and how he had blissfully misunderstood what was happening between the two of them; assuming a degree of familiarity with her that was wholly unwarranted.

  I pray I am not setting myself up for further disappointment, for I am as much in love with her as ever before, and I will do everything in my power to show her that I am worthy of a second chance, starting with her relations.

  Darcy and Elizabeth were likely just as surprised as the Gardiners when their paths crossed near the pond. How disappointing for the former, for as much as he wished to meet Elizabeth’s London relations, he longed for more time alone with her.

  Elizabeth could barely suppress her enthusiasm in approaching the elegant couple, giving Darcy to know that they were very important to her and she was exceedingly fond of them. Darcy could only hope that one day in the very near future he would be fond of them as well.

  * * *

  When the introductions were made, Elizabeth could not help but be pleased by the readiness with which Mr. Darcy fell into conversation with her aunt and uncle. What a triumph! How consoling that Mr. Darcy should know she had some relations for whom there was no need to blush. Elizabeth listened most attentively to all that passed between her relations and Mr. Darcy, and she gloried in every expression and every sentence of her uncle, which marked his intelligence, his taste, or his good manners.

  When it was time for the visitors to take their leave, Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth trailed slowly behind the Gardiners on the way to the awaiting carriage. “May I call on you in Lambton tomorrow, Miss Elizabeth?” he asked.

  His addressing her by her Christian name was such a welcome reprieve to the decorum he had exercised earlier. The past couple hours spent in Mr. Darcy’s company along with her relations had established a sense of intimacy with the gentleman, the degree to which had never even existed in Kent when she had spent copious amounts of time in his company.

  There they were, the two of them standing next to each other, and he was expressing an interest in calling on her. How odd that he had offered his hand in marriage to her and never once had those particular words crossed his lips: may I call on you?

  Can this really be a new start for the two of us?

  Against her own will, her mind leaped from a renewed friendship to courtship to marriage–all within the blink of an eye.

  Reason just as quickly prevailed over such a fanciful notion, which was fortunate, indeed, for having spent time with him, the steadily increasing favorable opinion she suffered could only improve, but she was not so certain that the reasons for her initial refusal had dissipated entirely.

  True, the complete discrediting of all of Wickham’s false accusations against Mr. Darcy had removed a significant impediment. His exemplary manner of behavior when meeting and subsequently conversing with her relations had also helped. But there was still the matter of his separation of his friend Mr. Bingley from her dearest sister Jane. His explanation, though very sound in hindsight, was rather insufficient in quelling her own pain as a consequence of Jane’s continuing heartbreak.

  “There is very soon to be an addition to my country party who will claim an acquaintance with you and will surely wish to renew said acquaintance as soon as can be.”

  “Oh?” Elizabeth asked, finding her voice even as she realized she still had not accepted his request to call on her in Lambton.

  “Indeed, it is Charles Bingley. He and his family are expected to arrive very soon.”

  “All his family?” Elizabeth questioned, unable to hide her dismay.

  Mr. Darcy nodded. “Also, my sister Georgiana shall be arriving shortly, and I would very much like to introduce the two of you. I shall have both of them accompany me, that is assuming you consent to my earlier request to call on you.”

  Elizabeth said, “Oh, yes–yes, indeed. I should very much like to see Mr. Bingley after all these months, and I will be delighted to meet your sister as well.”

  “Capital,” said Mr. Darcy, smiling.

  Once again, his smile nearly took Elizabeth’s breath away. Once again, she wondered at never having realized what a handsome man Mr. Darcy was.

  By now, it was time to say goodbye, and Mr. Darcy took Elizabeth by her hand and assisted her into the carriage. And although this was not the first time their hands had met, it was undoubtedly the first time such a powerful frisson of excitement raced through her whole body. That the gentleman held onto her hand a second or two longer than was necessary did not go unnoticed by Elizabeth.

  Neither had his intimate gesture gone unnoticed by her dearest aunt, Elizabeth surmised by the knowing look the older woman bestowed–a look Elizabeth pretended not to see.

  Chapter 4

  “I wager you are quite pleased in having overcome your reservations and agreeing to visit Pemberley, my dearest niece,” said Mrs. Gardiner when she could, later that evening after supper at the inn.

  “I confess, I do not regret my decision. But, Aunt Gardiner, things could have unfolded most unpleasantly were it not for–” Here, Elizabeth did not quite know what to say.

  How much was it safe to reveal to her aunt without fully revealing the small piece of her that had clung to the impossible hope that she might indeed see Mr. Darcy again–that they might reconcile the differences between them–that perhaps there might be more?

  “If not for what, Lizzy?”

  Elizabeth shrugged. “I suppose if not for Mr. Darcy himself,” she replied. “He might just as easily have thrown rocks at me and chased me away from his home with a stick after the manner of our last meeting,” Elizabeth said, her voice conveying a hint of playfulness she did not truly feel deep down inside.

  “Oh, Lizzy, how you enjoy making light of something so serious as meeting the gentleman who might very well have been your betrothed–perhaps even your husband, by now, had a confluence of circumstances not conspired against you.”

  “A confluence of events seems quite an understatement. After seeing Pemberley for myself this afternoon, I assure you nothing would have persuaded me to behave as I did in Kent. Did you not see the size of the place? The beauty? The splendor? I daresay I would have married my cousin, Mr. Collins, had he been the master of an estate one-tenth Pemberley’s grandeur.” Again, Elizabeth spoke in jest.

  “No–I shall not allow you to distract me with such silly conjectures. Be serious. You are a fine studier of people. Pray, do you believe there is a chance Mr. Darcy might renew his proposal?”

  “Dear Aunt, I must beg to differ with you, for were I as astute a studier of people’s character as I long professed to being then surely I would have realized that Mr. Darcy had fancied himself in love with me so much so that he offered his hand to me in marriage.”

  “I have not known you to doubt yourself like this before.”

  “I am afraid it took Mr. Darcy’s proposal and the events that happened as a consequence of my refusal to teach me that I never really knew myself at all.”

  How despicable her behavior had been toward Mr. Darcy. How humiliating! In courting prepossession and ignorance where her good opinion of Mr. Wickham was concerned, Elizabeth had totally misunderstood Mr. Darcy.

  “You are being very severe on yourself, and thus I will try not to do the same. However, I cannot let this conversation end without questioning something you just said.”

  “Oh?” Elizabeth cried.

  Mrs. Gardiner nodded. “You said Mr. Darcy fancied himself in love with you. Surely you do not mean to suggest that the gentleman was merely infatuated–that he does not know his own mind. The gentleman I had the honor of meeting and spending time with this afternoon strikes me as anything but a man of a capricious nature.

  “Indeed, he presents himself as a very serious man–perhaps a tad too serious. Saying that, his character is just as it ought to be for one tasked with so much responsibility at such a young age. I daresay he wants nothing but a bit of liveliness in his life, and no doubt he knows it too, which is the reason he fell in love with you, I believe, and which is why he offered his hand to you.”

  Elizabeth did not wish to expose herself to false hope, but her aunt’s words were too persuasive for her to dismiss them out of hand.

  “Even if what you are positing is true–even if I wanted to believe that everything you are saying is true, and I am not saying your sentiments are not, for I am not too presumptuous to believe my limited experience renders my opinions more valid than yours, what would it matter? Surely such a gentleman as Mr. Darcy would never propose to a woman who has rejected him once before?”

  The older woman arched her brow. “Who is to say how a man who was persuaded he had met the woman with whom he wished to spend his life might react given the right circumstances? As for myself, I should like very much to find out, but here is the material point, my dear Lizzy: would you?”

  * * *

  That night as Elizabeth lay awake in bed waiting for quiet slumber to carry her off to places she could scarcely imagine, a persistent thought occupied her mind.

  Oh, why did I allow myself to be so easily persuaded to tour Pemberley when I might well have complained of a headache?

  Of course, she had used such an excuse before in an attempt to elude Mr. Darcy. That was when they were in Kent, just after his cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam, had informed her, however unintentionally, of Mr. Darcy’s role in separating Jane from her lover, Mr. Bingley.

  Elizabeth had been no more successful in evading Mr. Darcy then than she had been that day. In defense of the chambermaid who had mistakenly said that Mr. Darcy was away from Derbyshire, even the gentleman’s own housekeeper had no awareness of his return ahead of the rest of his party.

  Seeing Mr. Darcy conversing with her relations with the ease of long-time acquaintances, even after she had expressly told him they were her uncle and aunt from Cheapside, caused the flicker of hope she had tried so hard to suppress upon seeing Pemberley to ignite into a full-blown flame.

  A part of her wanted to laugh out loud at this new awareness, the same part that silently argued, I shall wait until I see Mr. Darcy again tomorrow, and then I shall know how to feel.

  Meanwhile, within five miles away, Darcy was nestled in his great big comfortable bed for the first time in months. Having finally found the woman with whom he wished to spend the rest of his life, he had thought surely he would never again occupy that bed alone. Yet, there he was, his thoughts of the bewitching Miss Elizabeth Bennet, his sole companions.

  I wonder if Miss Elizabeth is fast asleep, or perchance, she is thinking of me. Dare I wish?

  I daresay the manner of our parting was a cause for hope, especially when she turned and looked back at me as her carriage drove away.

  I pray she is just as eager to see me tomorrow as I am to see her.

  Darcy smoothed his hand over the empty side of his bed, wishing with all his heart that Elizabeth was there—not five miles away in Lambton.

  What will it take to make Miss Elizabeth mine? My woman. My wife. My lover.

  With such thoughts as these, at length, he drifted off to sleep: the happiest place in the world for him ever since first laying eyes on her, for in his dreams Elizabeth already was his.

  He already knew every inch of her body. Her light and pleasing figure. Her sensuous curves. The soft touch of her hands exploring his body as eagerly as he explored hers.

  He loved the taste of her: the nape of her neck, the swell of her bosom, her sweet, sweet nectar.

  Indeed, in Darcy’s dreams, Elizabeth was his in every way, night after night until the morning came. Awakening with that very thought in mind, Darcy breathed a heavy sigh.

  Pray, my dreams will soon come true.

  Chapter 5

  Having had the advantage of espying Miss Georgiana Darcy descend the Darcy carriage with the aid of her older brother, Elizabeth was quite prepared for the formidable introduction when Mr. Darcy presented his sister to the Gardiners and herself.

  Elizabeth marveled at the irony. When she was under the spell of George Wickham’s charms, she had been entirely persuaded that Miss Georgiana Darcy was haughty and proud. Meeting the young woman for herself, Elizabeth had detected not the slightest hint of haughtiness in Miss Darcy.

  It pained Elizabeth, knowing she had believed the false testimony of the man who had been the means of breaking the young woman’s heart. She silently prayed there would be no lasting effects of Wickham’s treachery on young Miss Darcy’s ability to trust and one day fall in love again.

  With such a patient and caring brother as Mr. Darcy to guide her path, no doubt, Miss Darcy’s future happiness is assured.

  Watching the young woman conversing with Mrs. Gardiner, some thought of who else might be influencing Miss Darcy’s life entered Elizabeth’s mind.

  Colonel Fitzwilliam, her co-guardian along with Mr. Darcy to be sure, Elizabeth surmised. What of Lady Catherine de Bourgh, or Mr. Darcy’s other aunt, the Countess of Matlock? Heaven forbid, Mr. Charles Bingley’s pernicious sister, Miss Caroline Bingley, might influence Miss Darcy.

  Before Elizabeth had time to dwell on that particular line of thinking, another guest was shown into the room: Mr. Charles Bingley himself. As this was the gentleman’s first occasion of meeting the Gardiners, all the introductions were made in the usual way.

  It did not take Elizabeth long to detect a change in the young man.

  He was anything but the jovial, amiable gentleman whom Elizabeth recalled. Indeed, he was rather shy, smiling just a little and awkwardly, at that, and saying even less.

  Does his altered state have anything to do with his guilt in having taken his leave of Hertfordshire on the morning after his ball and his failure to return when he said he would–as he had promised my sister Jane he would?

  Seeing him in the same room with young Miss Darcy confirmed that which Elizabeth was all but certain she already knew, for there was no symptom of love between the two of them whatsoever. Miss Bingley had lied about her brother’s feelings for the young woman in her letter to Jane informing her that Mr. Bingley had no plans to return to Hertfordshire.

  Indeed, through the entirety of the morning visit, the two of them had not spoken to each other at all. There were certainly no stolen glances between them, for when Miss Darcy was not looking at her brother as though silently taking her cues from him on how she ought to act, she was either looking about the room or at times looking at the floor.

  Elizabeth was amazed, indeed, when Charles Bingley called on her soon after he had taken an earlier leave with the Darcys. Though the Gardiners were out, she was perfectly happy to receive him, supposing he had likely come to retrieve something he had left behind during his earlier visit. Glancing about the room, she could not imagine what that might be.

  The gentleman’s real purpose soon became apparent.

  “Miss Bennet,” he began, “I fear I owe you and your family, your elder sister, especially, a great apology for not returning to Hertfordshire as I had promised. I fear there has been something of a misunderstanding–though hardly an excuse, mind you–”

  “A misunderstanding?” Elizabeth interrupted.

  Bingley nodded. “I–I allowed myself to be persuaded that returning to Hertfordshire was in no one’s best interest and that I was misguided in my belief that your elder sister cared for me. Although, if such is indeed the case after the manner of my behavior and my continued absence, then I have no one to blame but myself. I should have relied on my own counsel and thus followed my own heart.”

  “Are you saying that you have knowledge of my sister’s true feelings–knowledge which you have chosen not to act upon?”

  Here the young gentleman nodded again. “Knowledge I only received on the way here to see you. Darcy felt it incumbent upon himself to lay out the whole of it.”

  “Mr. Darcy? This morning?”

  “Indeed, he even confessed to having knowledge of your sister’s being in Cheapside earlier this year, very likely in the hopes of seeing me. He confessed your part in enlightening him to your sister’s true feelings, which is why I made some excuse about having to remain in Lambton a while longer this morning. I wanted to see you–to speak with you in privacy.”

 

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