Sex Crimes, page 2
I just couldn’t wrap my head around Libby falling pregnant that night. I know I was real careful with condoms and shit. I think I did fall asleep for a bit so they might have got into it then because as I recall, I was the only one that got some real action. Chris actually made us get into some girl on girl action. It was kind of fun but freaky. We just hammed it up and all those acting classes came in handy. It was like some silly porno performance. Libby seemed to get into it. Bit creepy.
I hoped Libby knew what she was doing. If it was me? I’d have been to the doctor asap to have it removed. I wouldn’t have given it a second thought. Just whoosh. Gone. I wouldn’t throw my life away for a baby now. I’m sixteen and I’ve got a lot of partying to do before I settle down. This whole drama was going to cause a rift in my friendship with Libby. I could tell. Even back then. She’d be fat and miserable for months and then tied down with a screaming baby. She was being a fool. But she was stubborn and there was no telling her anything. Stupid bitch.
My phone made a noise in my pocket. I thought it was set to silent. Beekman was a no-phones school and that would have been an instant detention if a teacher had heard it. I checked the new notification. No shit. It was Megan K. Bergin. She’d accepted my friend request. That was totally awesome. I took off like a jack-rabbit to the loos and locked myself in a cubicle. Call Libby, I hissed at it. I could not wait to tell her the good news. We were uber-detectives and we were closing in on our target.
3.
Lola Kelly
I like Chester. He’s a bit of a goof-ball but he’s funny and kind of cute in a Shaggy from Scooby-Doo sort of way. He’s usually so laid back he’s nearly asleep so he really freaked me out when he grabbed me by the wrist and dragged me into the photography room.
‘We need to talk,’ he’d almost growled.
I wasn’t scared. More like a bit alarmed. I’d never said more than a handful or words to him unless we were paired up for some impro during open classes.
‘What’s the matter, Chester?’ I said. ‘Let go of me.’
He let me go roughly and I stood facing him, leaning back against the long bench-desk and raised my eyebrows, indicating that I’d like some answers.
‘Brent told me that you’ve been whispering around school that Libby O’Neil is pregnant.’
His eyes were wild and he looked like he was shaking a bit. I just shrugged lamely.
‘That’s really cruel and bitchy. Saying that kind of shit really can mess with a girl’s reputation. What’s she ever done to you!?’ he fumed.
I took a deep breath. Shit. This business was getting out of hand. I’d only told Jacinta. That’s all. And maybe Hayley. But it was Abigail doing most of the whispering as far as I was concerned. But this was not my problem, it was Libby’s and I’d be damned if I was going to cover her arse.
‘Chester,’ I said slowly. ‘I would never be such a bitch. I only know what I’ve been told and I have it on good authority that Libby O’Neil is in fact, pregnant. And word is that she is keeping it.’
He looked at me intently. Scanning my face. Reading me. He cocked his head, his mousy brown hair falling over his face and he looked completely spooked and even more like Shaggy.
‘Shit!’ he muttered.
‘What’s it to you anyway?’ I asked and stood up to leave. ‘Since when did you give a crap about Libby O’Neil and become her champion or whatever?’
He shrugged and didn’t look at me. I bent down trying to figure what the hell was his problem and saw that his face was pink and his eyes were, yes, his eyes were wet.
‘Are you crying?’ I asked.
‘No!’ he snapped back. ‘I’ve got a cold.’ And he gave a wet sniff as if to prove it.
‘OH. MY. GOD.’ I said heavily as it dawned on me. ‘You. It was you! Did you do Libby O’Neil? She’s in Year Ten and you’re a senior. Ew.’
‘I…it wasn’t,’ he stammered and I knew I had him.
‘I won’t tell anyone. Abigail told me, well, as much as told me that it was someone Libby met at that Drop Dead Gorgeous gig last month. That was obviously just to throw me off the scent.’
‘But are you sure, Lola? This might be just a stupid rumour or Libby trying to get attention. She is a drama queen.’ Chester stammered.
He had a point. Libby O’Neil was a bit of an attention seeker. Actually more than just a bit.
‘True. But I think it’s real. She’s going to the school counsellor next week and she’s telling her parents then.’
‘Oh, shit!’ Chester shook his head. His blue eyes were hectic, darting this way and that. ‘I’m going to be in the shit. When my parents find out…oh shit. Why doesn’t she just…you know…have a termination?’
I shrugged.
‘You’d have to ask her.’
‘Say nothing, Lola. If you blab…I’ll tell everyone that you gave Hobbsy a blow job in the dark room.’
I looked at him. Shocked. Bloody Michael Hobbs must have blabbed to his mates. Arsehole. Chester looked wild and I knew he wouldn’t hesitate to follow through with his threat.
‘Fine. Your secret’s safe with me,’ I said and I really meant it.
I liked Chester. He was actually really cute when he got animated. I hadn’t noticed that before.
We walked back out into the sunshine together and I gave him a little pat on the arm. His skin was warm and the light hairs on his arm were soft.
‘It’ll be okay, Chez.’
I had to finish Wuthering Heights for English so I took myself off to the big fig tree in the courtyard and sat against the trunk and began reading. It was a good story but the language was a bit turgid and heavy. I didn’t relate to Cathy at all. She was wild and a risk taker. That’s not me. I play it safe. I couldn’t believe Chester knew about that BJ I gave Michael. It was the first and only time. I was still carrying my V card and that sort of gossip would have totally destroyed my reputation. Unfortunately if Chester knew, then probably his little group of abstract performers did too. Hopefully it was contained to Chester and Michael’s little club of outsiders. Maybe Michael only told Chester. They’re tight. Like bro’s. It was concerning.
I may have blabbed a little about Libby and the ‘tummy bug’ but I made a firm commitment to myself that day to keep Chester’s secret, at least until it became common knowledge. Which it would. Stuff like that goes like a bush fire. It spreads. Fast and furious. On that particular day Libby’s pregnancy was like a flint sparking on dry leaves but it was going to be fanned by teenage speculation and I just decided right then to keep out of it because I for one did not want to get burned.
***
4.
Chester McNaughton
She’d been totally avoiding me. For two weeks. I knew she was at school for one day during that last week because everyone was talking about it. There was an appointment at the school counsellor’s office and everyone, and I do mean everyone, was watching, when Mr and Mrs O’Neil arrived and everyone was also watching when they left, dragging Libby behind them an hour later. All of them had clearly been crying. I caught Libby’s eye but she just gave me a faint, almost imperceptible head-shake. What the hell did that mean? She couldn’t avoid me forever. I had a stake in this.
I looked at her front door. It was solid. Wooden. Smooth and had an old-fashioned brass knocker. Taking a deep breath, that felt like dry ice in my chest, I leaned forward and rapped three times. It was louder than I expected. I’d been to this house a hundred times. My folks are best friends with the O’Neil’s. My dad teaches at Sydney Uni with Tom O’Neil. Stuffy academics.
I’d been losing sleep wondering if Libby had told them about me. It’s not like we were an item. We weren’t going out or anything. Just friends. But we crossed the line back there that day and who knew it was going to end up like that. I was kind of hoping it was the beginning of something between us but I wasn’t thinking ‘baby’, more like a casual sort of dating arrangement.
Libby was a cool sort of chick. Pretty in an elfin sort of way and she’d been very affectionate that day. Almost rabid really. She certainly didn’t force herself on me but she was what you might call, ‘pretty forward’. It took me by surprise really because up until that point she’d always been a bit distant and aloof with me. Laid back and cool. But the day of her father’s birthday party, she’d dragged me up to her room and just offered it up. As if I was going to refuse.
The door opened and it was Mrs O’Neil. Her eyes looked like they’d been sown in with red cotton and her nose was chaffed from all the tissues she’d been blowing into, I presumed. Not a happy woman.
‘Chester? Hi there,’ she smiled and nodded.
There was a hard lump in my throat but I was fairly certain from her voice and the hint of warmth in her eyes that Libby had most definitely not told her mother about my role in this drama.
‘Is Libby home? I noticed she hasn’t been at school for a bit and wondered if she was sick. Is she okay?’
Casey O’Neil looked nervous and her smile melted. She was a good-looking old broad. Maybe a bit hard around the edges. She was one of those ball-breaking career women who always seemed poised and ready to attack a lurking misogynist. She was a book publisher and a successful one. I really hoped that she’d help me get my book published one day. That was a dream I could see withering in front of me as she stepped back and welcomed me into her home.
‘She’s upstairs, in her room,’ the lean fair-headed woman said in a small voice. ‘Do you know where that is? Third on the right.’
Did I know where her bedroom was? Yes. I’d been in there plenty of times. Listening to music. Helping her with her studies. And the last time I was in there of course, I impregnated her. It was a strange question to ask. I think Mrs O’Neil had been drinking. She smelled like stale wine and she had glassy eyes. I just nodded lamely and nervously pulled my hair back into a pony-tail which I secured with the hair tie around my wrist.
I took two steps at a time, my heart pounding so hard I could actually see the pulse beneath my white t-shirt. My breathing was shallow and my face felt numb. I had no idea what I was going to say to Libby? What could I say? This was one improvisation I’d never encountered or considered.
I rapped lightly on the closed door.
‘Come in,’ her little voice called, almost chirpily.
I opened it and stood looking sheepish in the doorway. Libby was sitting on the carpet at the end of her bed, her laptop beside her and a tall half- drunk glass of juice next to it.
‘Oh shit, it’s you,’ she greeted me with a dramatic eye-roll.
My belly felt leaden. It was not exactly the reaction I was hoping for.
‘Nice to see you too, Libby,’ I said sarcastically, stepping forward and closing the door behind me. ‘Are you okay? You haven’t been at school.’
‘Knock it off, Chez. You’re not such a shit-hot actor, you know? And I can see in your eyes that you already know the deal. That’s why you’re here.’
I sighed and sat down on the carpet opposite her, legs crossed. She was wearing purple and black striped leggings and a tight black t-shirt. Her dark bangs fell across her face and she looked younger without all the make-up she often wore. My pretty little goblin girl.
‘Yeah, I know,’ I nodded. ‘I just wanted to come by and let you know that I am totally there for you. Whatever you need me to do or whatever….you haven’t told your folks it was me, have you? Your mum still seemed pretty civil down there just then.’
She had her Facebook page open but shut the screen and looked up at me with those big, green eyes.
‘Chester….if you tell anyone about what happened between us…just…it wasn’t you, okay?’ she sighed.
‘What do you mean it wasn’t me? I worked it out. I have done some biology at school you know and I know about a woman’s cycle and…’
‘Oh…don’t gross me out. Stop it. Just forget it Chester. Completely forget about it. It’s not your problem.’
‘I can handle it, Libby. It won’t be easy. My folks will have a coronary, but I’ll be there for you. This is our problem to tackle together.’ I reached out to touch her knee but she pulled away from me as if I had burned her.
‘Chez!’ she glared at me. ‘Read my lips. Not your problem. Not your baby. Someone else’s problem. Someone else’s baby.’
I felt like I’d been stung. I scanned her face. She couldn’t look me in the eye.
‘I don’t believe you,’ I said and felt my cheeks burning. ‘If it wasn’t me, who was it?’
I was getting angry at that point. How could she have put me through this for the last two weeks and not said something? Rung me to put me out of my misery.
‘Some guy in a band that Abigail and I met at a gig at the Entertainment Centre.’
I stared at her. I may not have been the best actor in the school but I could tell a fake when I saw it and she was faking big-time. But why? It made no sense.
‘We weren’t safe, you and I, Libby. I know that…and there is no way in hell you can be certain that this isn’t my baby. You told me you were on the pill. And I thought you were a virgin and it was our first time together and…’
‘Sometimes the pill doesn’t work and as if I was a virgin! But I’m going with the other guy. I’m more certain it was his …you know…his. He’s a musician and well…that’s that.’
She snapped the words out like it was the end. No further discussion required. I stared at her, feeling putrid. Her eyes were lorikeet green but as cold and matt dry as concrete.
‘That’s bullshit and you know it,’ I said, my voice wavering, exposing my pain. ‘What is it, Libby? Is it that you screwed us both and just decided to go with the cooler dude so that you wouldn’t get teased by your friends for sleeping with Shaggy from Scooby-Doo? Is it just that I’m not cool enough to come out for?’
I stood up, hands on hips, shaking. That was it. I’d called it. She didn’t want to tell her skanky little friends that she’d got it on with Chester McNaughton because I’m not one of the studs around school. I couldn’t compete with some goddamn musician.
‘I’ll demand a DNA test, Libby. And if you are bullshitting me, I will take my responsibility as a parent seriously and I’ll be wanting joint custody.’
What the hell was I saying? You can tell my mother is a lawyer. I didn’t want some kid. I was seventeen. I certainly didn’t want my first-born to be physically connected to this selfish, shallow little rag-doll. I was really hurting and I was thinking horrible things. I was deep down praying that she’d come to her senses and terminate before this got out of control. Maybe she’d miscarriage. Oh shit, that’s horrible, I know.
‘I don’t want to be your enemy, Libby. Please tell me the truth. I want to be a part of this if I’m responsible. This is not all about you. I’ve got feelings too….’
Libby stood up and looked me squarely in the face, her elfish face, twisted with an ugliness I had not thought possible of her.
‘Chester, if you make trouble and breathe a word about our one, quick, unsatisfying fuck, I will tell everyone you raped me. It’s my word against yours. And I’ll win and you’ll go to jail.’
I stared at her. Unable to speak. Unable to move. Unable to think. She continued, her voice full of hatred.
‘It was my daddy’s birthday and I asked Chester McNaughton to come up to my room to help me fix my television. He grabbed me and forced me onto the bed. I cried. I begged him to stop but he called me a prick teaser and said I’d been asking for it….’ She glared at me with eyes of cold malevolence. ‘Abigail will back me up and tell how upset I was the next day….you say one word to anyone and that’s what you’ll be facing. I fucking mean it.’
I felt sick. Really, deep, churning vomit sick. This girl, this small girl in front of me was evil. She was the real deal. There was something wrong about her. Poisonous. Toxic.
‘You are disgusting, Libby O’Neil,’ I said and spat at her feet. ‘I can only hope you are telling the truth that it’s not my baby because I’d demand that it be flushed into the sewer where it belongs because it’s related to YOU!’
She slapped me across the face and I barely felt it. I wanted to punch her in the face, wrap my hands around her little white throat. I would never hit a girl, though. But Libby O’Neil was tempting me to think about it.
Taking a loud breath of air into my lungs, I forced myself to calm down, to level out and I had to just hope karma would eat her alive. I had to believe that. I had no doubt at all that she would follow through on her rancid threat and I can’t deny that it scared me. It terrified me. It was every guy’s worst nightmare. A chick getting revenge by claiming to have been raped. The guys had talked about it and we were all totally aware of the consent thing and there was no way I would be with someone I didn’t trust. That’s what was eating me so bad. I’d trusted Libby. I’d actually been stupid enough to think that what happened between us had meant something.
‘Fuck you very much!’ I said and left the room.
Downstairs Mrs O’Neil asked me if I’d like to stay for dinner. I mumbled something about how much study I had to do and high-tailed it out of there. I felt like I’d been hit by a truck. Like I’d been beaten to a pulp in a boxing ring. I waited until I got home and then I locked myself away and howled like a baby. Oh shit, just like a little baby.
5.
Casey O’Neil
It broke my heart. Really. The tragedy of it was that for the first time in my little girl’s life, I was powerless to protect her. The right thing to do would have been to quickly and efficiently terminate this unfortunate business but apparently I did not have the legal right to force that option on my daughter. It didn’t seem right. I was her mother. Her legal guardian!
