Love Inspired Suspense June 2021--Box Set 1 of 2, page 25
A ticking sounded in Jonah’s temple as he considered the question. Human beings? The thought made him shudder.
“Ah, deer hunting?” The statement came out more like a question.
“Well, I have a couple kinds for that.” The clerk levered off the counter and crouched down, apparently reading box labels stashed below. He pulled out a small box and set it on the smooth surface, its contents shifting with a clinking noise. “I recommend this type. Take a deer out right quick. As long as you’re a good shot,” the salesman added with a slanted smile. “If you’re a bad shot it doesn’t make no difference what kind of bullet you got.”
“True,” Jonah muttered, hating the idea of shooting anything. “I’ll take it.”
He had to be ready.
To protect his family.
NINE
Liddie had trouble sleeping that night after their run-in with Dean in the parking lot at the grocery store. What if Jonah hadn’t been nearby? What if she had been unable to keep Daisy safe?
What if...? What if...? What if...?
The barrage of worries pinging in her head kept her awake all night. As the sleepless hours stretched on, she grew increasingly frustrated that no one seemed to want to investigate Dean as a possible suspect in Maggie Troyer’s death.
Oliver Applegate’s fingerprints were all over the murder weapon, so why should they bother with Dean? That seemed to be the consensus. That, and the belief that Daisy was a confused and traumatized little girl.
When the first hint of dawn softened the dark shadows of her room, Liddie stopped pretending she was going to get any sleep. She flung the quilt back and got out of bed and ready for the day. It was Sunday, but the Amish only held services every other week. She was relieved that today was an “off Sunday” and she wouldn’t have to face the community and their curious stares. However, her relief was short-lived when Ellen announced they were going to visit her daughter in nearby Apple Creek. Not in the mood to be scrutinized by Jonah’s dead wife’s family, Liddie asked to be dropped off at home. She hadn’t been there since she left for this job, and she couldn’t avoid them forever. Besides, she hoped to shut down any rumors they might have heard about her.
Would she ever get out of the spotlight?
Thankfully, when Jonah turned the buggy up the lane of her childhood home, she spotted her grandfather sitting in the rocker on the stoop of his dawdy haus. He lifted his pipe in greeting. His welcoming smile dispelled any doubts that she had about stopping by for a visit. She had really missed him.
Liddie hopped out of the buggy and looked up at Jonah and a warm flush heated her cheeks when she found him watching her. “Denki,” she said shyly as she stepped away from the buggy.
Wide-eyed, Andy jumped to his feet and peeked out from behind a wall that shielded the back seat from view. “Are you coming back, Miss Liddie?”
His earnest question caught her off guard. Her gaze automatically went to Jonah’s. More than once she had offered to leave for good and more than once, he had insisted she stay. But right now, his stoic expression made her wonder if he was just being polite. What was going on behind those serious brown eyes? Maybe yesterday’s excitement had been the last straw. Maybe that’s why he hadn’t insisted she come with them to his former in-laws’. Her heart thudded in her ears and she forced a bright smile for the benefit of the children. “Of course, I’ll be back in the morning.”
“Dat said we’re sleeping in our own beds tonight.”
Liddie could imagine Jonah reassuring his children that they wouldn’t be staying overnight at his in-laws, yet she wondered how Ellen felt about that.
Making a point not to look at Jonah, Liddie reached into the back of the buggy and patted Snowball. Daisy had refused to go anywhere without her new puppy. Her doll was squished into the seat between her and the wall. “I’ll see you both tomorrow.”
“Will you be home in time for breakfast?” Andy asked, sliding back into his seat.
Liddie smiled again. If she could only bottle this boy’s forthrightness. “As soon as my brother is done with his morning chores, he’ll bring me right—” She had been about to say the word home, but stopped herself short. “He’ll bring me back,” she finally settled on saying.
Liddie grabbed her small cloth bag with some overnight essentials and watched Jonah turn the buggy around and leave.
“The prodigal granddaughter has returned,” her grandfather said.
“Only for the night.” She scanned the familiar landmarks and surprisingly tears pricked the back of her eyes.
“I heard there was some excitement at the Troyer farm.”
Liddie’s shoulders sagged. “Nice to know some things never change.” The Amish tongues wagged at a speed that could rival the internet.
“Wie bischt du heit?” How are you today?
“Ich bin gut.” I’ve been good.
Her grandfather bit the mouthpiece of his pipe and tilted his head, as if to say, “Are you sure?”
“Yah, I just wanted to see everyone. Jonah and his children are visiting relatives and I feared I’d be in the way.” She clasped her bag in front of her and her eyes went to her childhood home. “I suppose I shouldn’t put off the inevitable.”
“I suppose you shouldn’t.” Her grandfather puffed on his pipe. “Make sure you spend some time with me before you go.”
“Of course.” Her grandfather had been a calming force in their family. First with her sister Bridget and her decision to leave the Amish and now with her. Despite his conservative roots, he seemed to be able to find love and acceptance more readily than her own parents. She suspected it was because he had his own more circuitous path to Amish baptism than most, making him more understanding of her struggle.
Liddie let out a long breath and climbed the steps of her childhood home. She lifted her hand to knock, not really sure if she should. She never had to knock before. But something compelled her to.
Her mother answered the door, her curious gaze morphing into pure joy. Her hands flew to her face. “You’re home!”
“Hello, Mem.” Emotion clogged her throat. She had missed seeing her mother dearly. The tiny scar on her cheek from where a branch had caught her when she was a little girl. The way her nose scrunched up when she smiled. The patches of gray hair that seemed to frizz just a bit more than the brown hair around the edges of her bonnet after standing over the stove.
Liddie had missed everything about her mother.
“Willkumm. Willkumm.” Welcome. Her mother stepped back to allow Liddie entrance. “Did you eat breakfast? Your father and brothers are in the barn doing their morning chores. They’ll be so happy to see you.”
Liddie smiled tightly, not wanting to burst her mother’s bubble. Her father would not be happy to see her. She set her things down on a bench inside the door. “Can I help with breakfast?”
“Yah.” Her mother breezed into the kitchen and the two of them worked on preparing scrapple and a huge bowl of scrambled eggs.
As Liddie stood side-by-side with her mother, she realized how much she had missed being part of a family. The Troyer children, especially Andy, had developed a certain fondness for her, but their grandmother had kept her at arm’s length, refusing to allow her to help in the kitchen. Daisy had wanted so desperately to connect, but couldn’t get past her grief. And Jonah seemed to be guided by a sense of guilt and reluctance to move past the tragic loss of his wife.
“How are the children?” her mother asked, drying her hands on her apron.
“Andy is very precocious. Reminds me of Caleb and Elijah when they were younger.”
“Your brothers were a handful,” her mother said wistfully. “How is the girl?”
“Daisy’s very quiet.”
Her mother made a noise with her lips. “I can’t imagine how hard it was to lose her mother.” Her own mother’s eyes grew red. “I’ve missed you.”
“Me, too, Mem.”
“I wish you could stay longer than one night.” Her gaze suddenly drifted to beyond Liddie’s shoulder and her lips twitched. Butterflies flitted in Liddie’s stomach as she turned around. Her father stood in the mudroom, still in his coat and boots.
“Guder mariye, Dat.” Good morning.
“Lydia.” Her father used her formal name, causing her to brace for whatever would come next. “I didn’t know you were coming. Did you lose your job?” The accusation in his tone stabbed her heart, and her disappointment was mirrored in her mother’s pained expression.
“Nah, I did not lose my job,” she said evenly.
“Amos, Liddie came for a visit.” That was her mother’s nonconfrontational way of saying, “Please, let it go.”
“I heard there was trouble on the Troyer farm?” her father pressed on.
Liddie felt her face growing hot. “Yah, there has been.”
A muscle started to tick in her father’s jaw, and instead of trying to defend herself—from what, she wasn’t sure—she let the silence stretch between them. Finally, he said, “I hope you had nothing to do with it.”
Before Liddie had a chance to answer, her youngest brother, Caleb, looking so grown up at thirteen, wandered into the house followed by a more subdued Elijah, who at seventeen was probably starting to think about finding a nice Amish girl to settle down with.
“Hey, Liddie,” Caleb said, while sliding into his usual seat at the kitchen table. She loved how he treated her appearance like any other morning.
“Sight for sore eyes,” Elijah said, his eyes twinkling. At least her brothers seemed happy to see her.
“Wash up, boys. Then, let’s all sit and eat. Like old times.”
Liddie took her place at her usual seat to the left of Elijah. Her father sat at the head of the table. They bowed their heads and said a silent prayer of thanks. Then her father picked up his fork and began to eat, his anger radiating off of him.
Liddie knew exactly what it meant.
How dare she bring shame once again to their family.
Liddie picked up her fork. Her mother was right. Just like old times.
* * *
“It’s a little chilly out here.” Ruthann, Maggie’s older sister, slipped outside to join Jonah where he had gone to escape Maggie’s extended family. Jonah’s visits to Apple Creek since Maggie’s death had grown few and far between.
“Just needed a moment.” Jonah took off his hat and ran a hand over his head, then stuffed it back on. He leaned back in the rocker.
“We miss the kids,” Ruthann said, wrapping her arms tighter around her middle and rolling up on the balls of her feet. “How are they?”
Jonah kept his gaze on the land in front of him. Ruthann and her husband had ten children and a bustling farm, the model Amish family. He couldn’t help but feel envious, an emotion he was ashamed of.
“Jonah?” Ruthann leaned forward. “You okay?”
He rocked back and forth slowly, considering. “Just thinking of how things should have been different.”
“Gott had a plan.”
He made a noncommittal sound, then decided to answer her original question. “Andy is great. Loves the nanny. Daisy is still quiet, but seems to be doing better now that Liddie is here. I’m sure you heard about the puppy.” He shifted to look at her. “Can you believe we let him sleep in the house?”
“Poor Daisy. She reminds me so much of my sister. It must be too quiet around that big farm.”
Jonah couldn’t help but bristle. When Ruthann and Maggie’s parents had offered their farm to their youngest daughter, there was some resentment.
“Daisy needs her family,” Ruthann said, tucking her coat under her and lowering herself onto the rocker. She let out a tired sigh. Across the field, a few of the boys kicked a ball around while their sisters spun in circles, creating fans with their skirts.
Jonah cut his sister-in-law a sideways glance, but she didn’t seem to notice. “She has a family,” he said, not bothering to soften his tone.
Ruthann wrapped her fingers around the ends of the armrests. “Maggie’s family.” She waited a beat, then added, “Imagine how she’d thrive with all her cousins around. She wouldn’t have time to sulk.”
Jonah sucked in a breath, tamping down his anger. His sweet daughter had every right to sulk, as his sister-in-law referred to his daughter’s grief. “Daisy lost her mother.”
“All the more reason. I’d be happy to take in Daisy and Andy. Then you can go off and do your thing.” Ruthann’s disdain for his construction work was palpable. It always had been. That had been the crux of the argument when Ellen and Abe had passed on the family farm to Maggie and Jonah and not Ruthann and her family. Land among the Amish was at a premium. Ruthann always complained their house in Apple Creek was too small for their large family. Why did Maggie need such a large plot of land when her husband didn’t even farm?
“I have a nanny to watch the children,” Jonah said, suddenly wondering what Liddie was up to at this very moment.
“I’ve heard about this nanny.” The derision in Ruthann’s tone was unmistakable. “Mother has told me all about her. She’s not a good influence on the children. You’re not thinking clearly.” Ruthann reminded Jonah of Ellen. Made sense since they were mother and daughter. “Please, let my mother and the children stay here with us. We’ll make plans to sell this property and move to Hickory Lane as soon as possible.” Her brow furrowed. “It might take until spring to sell this place, but we should put the plan in motion as soon as possible.”
Jonah narrowed his gaze. “Where am I supposed to live? Are you suggesting I give up my children? My home?”
Ruthann folded her hands in her lap and pushed against the wood planks with the heel of her boot, rocking slowly back and forth. “You have a lot to figure out, Jonah.” Her calm tone made him uneasy. She had obviously been considering this for awhile. Maggie’s older sister had coveted his home long before his life had been upended.
Hot blood roared through his veins, making it hard to keep his temper in check and his thoughts straight. “Ruthann, I’m not abandoning my children or my home. Besides, that’s two more mouths to feed. You already have your hands full.”
“We always have room for more.” Ruthann lowered her voice. “You never wanted that big old farm. I hear you haven’t planted crops since before Father died.” She placed her palms together and pressed the tips of her fingers to her lips. “You can work your construction jobs without the hassle and responsibility of the farm.”
“Where am I supposed to live? I moved there to help your parents.” Jonah was trying to process her outrageous suggestion.
“Your intentions were good when you moved to Hickory Lane to help my parents. I know that.” Her condescending tone ripped right through him. “Now it’s time to let me and my husband take care of things.” Ruthann tilted her head, as if she were now just sorting this all out when, in fact, Jonah had obviously been invited here for this exact conversation. “Maybe you can move in with your brother? Didn’t he move to Buffalo?” His brother had moved to Buffalo and his brother was also former Amish. That was not an option.
Jonah tapped the porch railing with his fist. “Neh, you are not taking my children. You are not moving into my home.” He stomped past her and went into the house. Andy was playing with Matchbox cars in the corner with two of his cousins who were of similar age. Daisy was standing on a step stool next to an older cousin helping to prepare dinner. He grabbed the back of a chair to steady himself. The walls of the small home crowded in on him. Was he being selfish? Would his children be better off growing up with their cousins?
Jonah stuffed down his anger and joined the men who were setting up extra chairs and tables for dinner. He might have been offended by Ruthann’s offer, but he wasn’t going to cut short their visit because of it. With winter coming soon, it might be awhile before they came back again—if ever.
His gaze drifted to Ellen, who sat reading a story to one of her youngest grandchildren.
Indecision tightened in his chest. Did he owe Maggie’s family this? What about his children? Would they be better off?
What about Liddie? His pretty nanny’s name whispered through his brain.
Gott, help me do what’s right for my family.
TEN
As the sun set over her childhood farm, Liddie grabbed her coat and a quilt and went out and sat on the back porch. Her father was inside reading the Bible and her mother was knitting. After trying to make small talk in the sitting room thick with the tension of a family who couldn’t see eye-to-eye, she had to get some fresh air. Coming home had been a very, very bad idea. Her father’s anger rolled off him in waves. She supposed he was doing his best to shun her. To use one of the best-known Amish tools to pressure his wayward daughter to fall in line. Didn’t he realize his tactics might have the opposite effect? Now, if she felt compelled to leave the Troyers’ farm to protect the children, she’d have no place to go. He’d force her hand. The end result could be her moving to Virginia to live with her sister until she figured out her next step.
Was that what he really wanted?
Liddie adjusted the quilt over her legs in the chilly night air. She drew in a deep breath and held the collar of her coat closed. She loved the fresh smell of country air as the land settled in for the long winter ahead. The sweet smell of cornstalks ready to be ground for feed mixed with the manure-rich soil. She closed her eyes and Jonah’s handsome face came to mind. She wondered if he’d ever farm the land, or if he’d continue to travel to Buffalo for construction jobs once the weather turned to spring again. What kind of family life would that be? Left alone on the farm for long days.
The door creaked and her eyes flew open. Despite the darkness, her face flushed at her thoughts. As if she and Jonah and the kids would someday be a family. She shifted toward the door. Her brother had his shoulders hunched and was making an effort to be stealthy in closing the door.
