Sedona Sin, page 7
Connie’s phone call taunted me, but I tried to push it away. “I think Adam’s right.”
He turned toward me. “Even if I was willing, no one will respect a bitten Alpha.”
“Says who?” I asked, wishing my earlier conversation with Connie hadn’t popped into my head.
He looked like he might answer me, but then he broke eye contact. “Doesn’t matter. I think Luke and Raven might be coming down to visit tomorrow. They’re all the help we’ll need if the jaguars come to town looking for trouble.” He crossed his arms as another gust of cold wind slammed into us. “What happened with Connie? Bart said she upset you.”
Oh shit. This wasn’t a good time to verify his fears about not being accepted as an Alpha. But dammit, I sucked at lying. Luckily, I excelled at changing the subject. “It’s not important. Now, what about that Jeep ride you told the boys about?”
His smirk made it clear my segue way wasn’t as smooth as I had hoped, but thankfully, he didn’t press it. “It’s pretty cold.”
I took out a pair of gloves from my pocket and pulled them on. “We’ve got gloves and hoods.”
“You’re sure?” Asher asked. I nodded, and he treated me to a grin. “Let’s do it.”
God, I loved seeing him smile. And I loved knowing I had something to do with it even more.
CHAPTER 9
Asher
We got the car seats fastened into the back seat of the Jeep, then buckled in the two wriggly, pint-sized werewolves. The temperature had dropped steadily when the sun vanished behind the mountains. I’d have to take it slow tonight; I had precious cargo on board. Naomi got into the passenger seat and buckled up. The wind blew her dark hair across her face, and her scent filled my lungs. Jasmine and something else. Sage? Didn’t matter. She smelled like heaven.
Suddenly, my wolf was agitated and wide-awake right below the surface. It would have been expected if the full moon were coming soon, but we were two weeks away from that. When we’d touched earlier in her kitchen, the connection had been primal, a possessive recognition. It wasn’t a big leap to assume it was what Luke had warned me about: the wolf recognizing its mate. But I didn’t trust myself to know for sure.
I cared about Naomi. Hell, last night, when I’d thought I was too late…damn. She and her boys were the sunlight in my world. What were the chances I’d be lucky enough for her to be my one mate for life? Probably pretty slim. Since the brush of our hands, I worried that I had imagined the connection, exaggerated how it felt, because I wanted it to be her.
Her gloved hand came to rest over mine on the gearshift. “Are we going?”
“Yeah.” I chuckled and started the engine. “Sorry. Got distracted.”
With the hood up on her coat, and that sly smile on her lips, she had my heart in knots. God, she was beautiful.
I forced myself to focus on the road and pulled out of the lot. In a few minutes, we were off the pavement, bouncing slowly along a firebreak road with a blanket of stars twinkling above us. I worried at first that it might be too cold for them in my open Jeep, but Bart and Ben squealed with delight from the back seat, and every once in a while, a bump had Naomi joining them.
Shit. I may never stop smiling.
Once we reached a lookout point over the valley, I killed the lights and turned off the engine. Naomi scanned the sky overhead. The waning moon was barely a sliver in the sky, allowing the stars to shine brighter. The dusting of snow on the top of the Red Rocks glowed in the dim starlight.
She rested her gloved hand over mine. “It’s gorgeous out here.”
“I see constag…consta…constaglations,” Ben said from the back seat.
“Constellations,” Naomi corrected.
I pointed up at a bright star to the north. “Recognize that one?”
The little guys followed my arm. Bart narrowed his eyes and finally shook his head. “I don’t know that one.”
I lowered my arm, twisting back to look at the boys. “It’s the wishing star. Make a wish.”
“I wish…for a new LEGO set,” Ben said with a solemn, reverent tone. “The real ones, not those big DUPLO blocks.”
“I’m still thinking,” Ben replied without taking his eyes off the star.
I glanced over at Naomi. “What about you?”
“I wished for our pack to pull together and be stronger for the next generation.” She met my eyes. “Your turn.”
I lost myself in her eyes. My true wish was for my wolf to be right, for this amazing woman, my friend, to be the other half of my soul. But out loud, I answered, “That whatever comes our way, I can keep all of you safe.”
We stared at each other for a moment. Could she see my true wish in my eyes?
Bart snapped us back to reality. “I wish for a dad.”
My gut twisted. I reached back to grasp his ankle, and his bright eyes met mine. “Your dad was a good guy.”
He nodded. “Mom said he saved us from the bad man.”
“Yeah, he did.” I faced forward again.
Next to me, Naomi was staring up at the stars again. When she glanced my way, tears welled in her eyes, but she smiled in spite of them. “Seems like a waste to come all the way out here and not throw a single snowball.”
Sedona got a dusting of snow each winter, not enough for a snowman, but we could muster enough for a few snowballs. The boys whooped their approval. I scanned the area. There hadn’t been a scent out of place since we left my office. Tomorrow night, all the boys would be on lockdown during the new moon so we could protect them from any rogue jaguar shifters.
I finally nodded. “Okay, but you need to stay close to the Jeep, understand?”
Ben was already working at unbuckling his car seat. “Yes!”
I got out and popped my seat, pushing it forward so I could get to Bart. I unfastened him and lowered his feet to the ground.
“Thanks, Uncle Asher.” He ran for a snow drift, bumping his brother on the way.
Naomi came around to stand beside me. I looked down at her, but all her attention was on the boys. I kept my voice low, hoping the wind might keep our conversation private from little ears. “You never told me what Connie had to say.” Her shoulders visibly tightened, and I could hear her heart rate quicken. Having heightened senses made it easy to spot when someone was hiding something. I frowned. “Are you okay?”
She glanced my way. “Cole was right about his parents being less than excited about having a bitten werewolf as our Alpha.”
I’d expected as much. Hell, I sort of agreed with them. But getting confirmation that I didn’t fit in—again—pissed me off. I ground my teeth, watching Bart bean his brother with a snowball. “Maybe it’s for the best.”
Naomi turned to face me, a crease marring her brow, her dark eyes narrowing. “How can you say that?”
I shrugged. “This isn’t new for me.” I focused on the boys again. “I just want you to be safe. I don’t give a shit who they make Alpha.”
Naomi grabbed my jacket in both hands, tugging me closer. My gaze cut to hers. Her voice was even, intense. “You better start giving a shit, because I don’t trust any of those born wolves to lead us. Wake up, Asher. They didn’t say a word while Caldwell had us bitten and stole our futures. He didn’t hold a gun to their heads. They chose not to see the horror because they didn’t think they could fight him with Bo and Blake at his side.” She pointed to Ben and Bart. “My boys were born shifters, but I’ll be damned if they ever look at us as lesser because we aren’t.”
I searched her eyes, my pulse speeding up to match the sound of hers pounding in my ears. She was right. But somewhere along the way, I’d learned to be an outsider, accepted it.
“They can only judge us if we let them.” She dropped her hands to her sides. “Don’t let them, Asher.”
I yanked off one of my gloves and brought my warm hand to her cool cheek. I needed to touch her skin. The Earth didn’t tilt this time, but my wolf calmed inside me. Everything did. I bent to kiss her and paused, enjoying the heat of her breath on my skin. She fused her lips to mine, touching, caressing. Her mouth opened as my tongue swept past her lips. She moaned, and my pulse quickened. My other arm slid around her waist, pressing her tight against me.
And suddenly an icy ball of snow connected with my ear, followed by raucous giggles. I broke the kiss, whispering against her lips, “War was just declared.”
She grinned, releasing me, and I chased after Ben and Bart, launching snowballs in return fire until we all collapsed on the ground, shivering and laughing. I turned my head and caught Naomi smiling at me.
For the first time in my life, I was right where I belonged.
By the time we got back to my office, the boys had dozed off. I transferred them, while they were still in their car seats, from the Jeep into the back of Naomi’s car without either of them waking.
I straightened up with a chuckle. “I think we finally tired them out.”
She stared up at me. “I guess I better get them home.”
I did not want her to leave, but I nodded slowly. “Probably.” I caught her hand. “Maybe I should follow you over there. Just to be sure there aren’t any jaguars waiting.”
A smile toyed at the corners of her mouth. “I didn’t smell any.”
“Me neither.” Her pulse matched mine again. I cleared my throat. “Guess I’m just not ready to say goodnight yet.”
“Then don’t.”
I raised a brow. “If I go with you, I might not be able to resist kissing you again.”
“Oh, I’m counting on it.” She grinned. “Get in.”
I went to the passenger side, my mind racing. This was uncharted territory for me. Relationships were never really my thing. It wasn’t for a lack of trying, but I’d managed to sustain one past the one-year mark. Naomi and I had been friends for almost three. Suddenly, I wasn’t sure if I was willing to risk that bond. And if I fucked things up, I wouldn’t just be losing her but the boys, too. And then there was the whole pack.
She pulled through the security gate of our pack compound and glanced my way. “You’re awfully quiet over there.”
“Sorry. Just wondering if this is a good idea.”
She parked and turned off the car before meeting my eyes. “If what is a good idea? Being Alpha? Coming here with me?” She paused and then whispered. “Kissing me?”
Aw, fuck. The hurt was plain in her voice even without werewolf hearing.
“Kissing you was the best idea I’ve had in years,” I said. She smiled, but it faded as I went on. “But you’re my only real friend in this pack. If I decide to force the issue and try to lead, I’m going to need you at my side.”
Her head tilted slightly, questions lining her face. “You’re afraid if we get involved as anything more than friends, I won’t be right there beside you all the way?”
“No.” I shook my head. “But I don’t trust myself not to fuck it up. You could end up hating me.”
“So…it’s you, not me?” She rolled her eyes. “We’re seriously going there already?”
I wasn’t sure how she did it, but she coaxed a chuckle out of me. “I sound like a dumb shit.”
“A little.” She agreed way too quickly. “Let’s get the monkeys to bed and then we can talk, okay? Clothes on and everything.”
I carried Ben into the house after Naomi and Bart. The boys awoke for a minute while we got them changed and into their beds.
“Night, Uncle Asher,” Ben mumbled against my ear.
I kissed his forehead. “Night, champ.”
We tiptoed out of the room to the kitchen where Naomi filled a kettle with water. “I need some tea. You want some?”
“Sure. Thanks.” I sat on a stool at the bar, watching her every move. There was a fluid, athletic grace about Naomi. And now that I’d kissed her and held her in my arms, I was noticing other things I hadn’t allowed myself to see before. Like the way she wet her lips as she turned the knob on the stove and fired up the burner, and the way her hips swayed when she crossed the room to grab mugs from the cupboard and drop a teabag into each one.
She spun around with a sparkle in her eyes. I was pretty sure she just caught me staring at her ass. She came around the bar and took the stool next to me while the water heated. “You’re my friend, so I’m just going to blurt this out and you can’t freak out.”
I chuckled, pretty damn sure she was about to scare the shit out of me. “All right.”
“Yesterday, when you came out of the bathroom in a towel, I just about choked on my tongue.” She fanned herself playfully until I swore heat was rising in my cheeks. Then her smile faded, her gaze locking on mine. “And this morning when I came out and saw Ben sleeping on your chest—” she shook her head “—my knees went weak.”
I opened my mouth to reply, but she silenced me with a slow, tender kiss. My heart hammered against my rib cage when she pulled back and whispered, “Then you touched me and my wolf… I don’t know what it was, but something happened.”
I nodded. “I felt it, too.” I traced my finger along the edge of her jaw, struggling to put everything into words. “My turn to tell you something…and you can’t freak out, either.”
“This sounds promising.” She smiled as the kettle started to whistle. “Hold that thought.”
She poured the water into the mugs and carried them over. Steam twisted up as she blew over the surface of the tea. She took a small sip and nodded. “Okay. I’m ready.”
“Luke told me that even though we were bitten, we would have mates. Raven was like us, and when she touched Luke, they both knew.” I waited for that to sink in. When her eyes met mine, I whispered, “I think you’re my mate.”
I don’t know what kind of reaction I expected, but her calm, knowing smile wasn’t it. “That’s what I was trying to say—in a super lame, try-not-to-freak-him-out kind of way. But I wanted to be sure you knew I was having a tough time keeping my feelings for you platonic way before my wolf got involved.”
She sobered, picking up her tea again. Her gaze was locked on her mug as she went on. “The whole ‘mate’ concept is a struggle for me since Caldwell. It seems like it should be romantic, but it’s not a big leap to see it as a prison.”
I reached for her free hand, brushing my thumb over her knuckles. “I wish we had gotten rid of Caldwell sooner.”
“No.” She shook her head, her eyes lifting to meet mine. “If I hadn’t been bitten and assigned as a mate to Brock, then I wouldn’t have Bart and Ben. I’m not going to allow regret to steal any of the joy they bring into this world.” She blinked back tears and cleared her throat. “I’m just saying that, at least for me, this isn’t some kind of pairing that is out of our hands like when Caldwell was alive. I chose you as my friend because, out of this entire pack, you were the one I trusted. And if I’m going to give my heart to someone, it’s going to be my choice, not my wolf’s.”
I lost myself in her eyes for a second as her words turned me inside out. My voice trembled under the weight of my emotions. “I’ve spent my entire life never really fitting in anywhere. That’s part of why I love being outdoors. The Red Rocks don’t care if you’re an orphan. They don’t give a shit about the color of your skin or how pure your bloodline is.” I laced my fingers with hers. “I feel that same sense of peace and acceptance when I’m with you, and that has nothing to do with my wolf or yours. It has everything to do with who you are.”
CHAPTER 10
Naomi
I’d known Asher long enough to know he was usually a man of few words, and he was as far from a player as you could get. If he dated at all, I didn’t know about it. I also never caught him in a lie. So when he told me his attraction to me was about who I was, not because of some primal wolf instinct, I believed him. I wanted to pinch myself.
But then he kissed me. Only this wasn’t a sweet, chaste kiss like the one we’d had in the snow. This was a hungry, possessive kiss. I surrendered to the passion, my desire for him consuming me. My fingers slid back into his long, silky hair, clutching fistfuls and enjoying the growl rumbling his chest. He got up from his stool without breaking the kiss and lifted me into his arms as though I weighed nothing.
My teeth grazed his lower lip as he walked us down the hall toward the master bedroom. Holding me with one arm, he closed the door and then lowered me until my feet touched the ground. I slid my hands under his shirt, lifting it over his head, and he did the same to mine before claiming my lips again. The heat from his body warmed me all over as he held me tight against him, and I suddenly needed to get rid of my bra, my pants—Hell, everything had to go. I didn’t want anything coming between us. Ever.
“Need you naked,” I gasped into the kiss, my voice so breathless I almost didn’t recognize it.
Dear god, I’d never seen such a sexy smile on Asher’s face before. Wolfish. Damn, if he ever discovered the power of that grin, I was in trouble.
“You first.” His voice was deep, raw, and even sexier than his smile, if that was possible. He had my bra unhooked and off in record time. His fingers worked on my jeans as he kissed me again. My hardened nipples brushed his chest and I moaned, heat curling low in my belly. I ran my hands down his chiseled abs and unbuttoned his pants. I slid his boxers and jeans down over his perfect ass. He caught the front before his erection got in the way, and his pants fell to the floor.
I wriggled out of my own, and suddenly, insecurity swamped me. I hadn’t been naked with a man of my own choosing since before I was bitten, and with no one at all since I gave birth to twins in that storage facility. The last time I’d had a boyfriend, I didn’t have stretch marks right below my belly button, my boobs were probably perkier, and although I was still fit, my bikini body was long gone.
Asher’s gaze wandered over me, and I fought the urge to cover myself. His head cocked slightly. “What’s wrong?”
I walked my fingers up his tan, rock-hard abs and finally met his eyes. “Truth?”
“Always.” His large hand slid up my back as he drew me closer to him. His touch was reassuring, and while his erection pulsed between us, his gaze remained patient. The desire was there, but he clearly wasn’t going to rush me.
