Homerun Daddy, page 11
part #1 of Timberwood Cove Series
Monday morning I got up earlier than both Bryce and Liam and headed into the kitchen. I wanted to make today special. The day I told my mate I was a shifter. I had it all planned out, but I wanted everything to be a surprise. So I got to work putting together a picnic brunch before the sun even rose.
I managed to finish it all up and get breakfast going by the time I heard the boys stirring. My boys. They were mine. My heart thudded faster knowing I was close to having the family I’d dreamed of. The entire weekend had been perfect, and I didn’t want to spend another night apart from them. Hopefully after today, I wouldn’t have to.
“Hey, buddy,” I said to Liam as he ambled into the kitchen and grabbed the plate I’d just made for him. “How did you sleep?” He looked a little more tired than usual.
He shrugged and grabbed a fork, gathering up some eggs. “Okay. I had a bad dream.”
I frowned and pulled out a chair, spinning it around and straddling it as I faced him. “Want to talk about it?”
He glanced toward the doorway, like he was looking for Bryce. When Liam didn’t see him, he turned his gaze back to me. “It was about my mom,” he said, his voice almost a whisper.
My heart skipped a beat. I still didn’t know the full story about what happened to Liam’s mother. All I knew was that whatever it was had also caused Bryce’s injuries. I’d wanted to ask, but I hadn’t wanted to push him. I figured if it was something he wanted to talk about, he’d prefer to be the one to bring it up. I reached out and squeezed Liam’s shoulders. “I can’t say I know what it’s like to lose a parent, but I can kind of relate.”
He looked up at me, curious. “What do you mean?”
“I was adopted,” I told him. “Never knew my birth parents, and my adoptive father had lost his mate before I was born. So I only grew up with one parent too.”
He nodded. “It’s why you want to take care of us.”
I paused, not sure what to say with that. I hadn’t really thought of it that way, but Liam had a good point. I definitely wanted to make sure Liam had everything he needed, but I’d not actually considered the underlying reason was because of my own circumstances.
“Does that bother you?” I asked, knowing this kid had an adult’s wisdom, and deserved complete transparency from me. “Are you afraid I might try to replace your mom?”
He shook his head. “No. Not at all.” He smiled then, shaking the weight off his shoulders. “I’m really happy you’re here, Jaxon.”
“Me too, buddy,” I said, ruffling his hair. “Me too.”
A couple of seconds later, Bryce came in, freshly showered and dressed. “You ready?” he asked Liam.
Liam jumped up and grabbed his backpack. “Yep!”
I walked up to Bryce and kissed him good morning, right in front of Liam, who giggled and raced out of the house.
“Good morning, gorgeous,” I murmured.
“Good morning,” he replied with a smile, wrapping his arms around my neck. “I see you got Liam all taken care of, yet again.”
“I did. Let’s get that boy to school.” I paused, looking down into his eyes. “After we drop him off, I’d really like to talk to you.”
His brow furrowed in curiosity, but he simply nodded. “Sure.”
I grinned. “Great.” Then I led him to the car, which I’d already packed up with everything we’d need today. It felt so natural to drive up to the school together with Bryce and Liam and see Liam off to school. Like he was ours. I couldn’t keep the goofy smile off my face thinking about us as a family.
“What?” Bryce asked, turning to me once Liam got out of the car and darted across the school yard.
“Just thinking about how lucky I am.”
Bryce flushed but his smile was pleased. “I think I’m the lucky one here.”
I chuckled. We were both lucky, and we had fate on our side.
“You want to go for a drive?” I asked, pulling out of the school parking lot.
“I thought you wanted to talk.”
“Yeah, but I know just the spot. We can talk, and…other things.” I shot him a grin.
“How can I say no to that?” he asked with a laugh.
I rolled down the windows and headed toward the highway on the west of Timberwood. There was a scenic drive along the coast, and I knew it would be gorgeous this time of day with the weather we were having. The wind whipped in, blowing through our hair as I turned onto the highway and cruised at an easy pace.
Every time I looked at Bryce, smiling as he watched the ocean sparkle to our left, my heart felt full. I turned on the music, and we fell into companionable silence.
But after a few minutes, I saw Bryce stiffen beside me. “Where are we going?” he asked, his eyes darting around frantically.
“Bryce?” I frowned, reaching for his hand. “Are you okay?”
His skin felt clammy, and a shudder ran through him.
“Bryce?” Now I was worried. He started breathing heavily, practically gasping, his eyes wild. He began shaking harder now, muttering to himself. With a quick glance in the rearview mirror, I jerked the car to the side of the road. Was he feeling sick again? He’d seemed fine since Saturday, but as I looked at his pale face and saw how shaken he looked, I knew this wasn’t illness. Something was very wrong. It was almost like he was having a panic attack. I squealed to a stop and turned to Bryce, gripping his face. “What’s wrong, baby?” I asked, not sure what to do.
He shook his head frantically, his mouth moving but no sound coming out. He was staring ahead at a rise in the road, a hill that opened up to a great view of the ocean, just where I wanted to take him.
“Look at me,” I said, and his eyes finally settled on me. They were wild and frantic. Full of fear.
“I—I can’t—” He swallowed hard, his eyes going back to the hill. Another shudder started to wrack his body.
There was something about where we were that was causing him to react like this. The only thing I could think to do was turn around and head in the opposite direction. I kept my gaze on the road as I sped back toward town, toward Bryce’s house, but I cut glances at him and kept telling him he’d be okay, telling him to breathe, that I had him. He was safe.
I didn’t know what was going on, but that was something I would make sure of; that whatever had him upset never did again.
As soon as I pulled into his driveway, I darted around the car and helped him out. He leaned on me more heavily now, his limbs unsteady, and I pulled him in tightly to my side, not even worrying with the cane. His legs faltered. Fuck that. I swung him up in my arms and carried him the rest of the way into his house, straight to his bed.
I quickly got him settled, murmuring softly to him all the while, reassuring him that I had him. That I was here. Then I climbed into bed beside him and wrapped my arms around him, holding him to my chest. I could hear his heart thundering.
“Just breathe, baby,” I whispered, stroking his back.
Eventually, the shakes subsided and he began to breathe more evenly, slowly drawing ragged breaths in and out. I remained silent other than my soft murmurs, not wanting to push him if he wasn’t ready to talk about this. However, I was prepared to wait it out. I needed to know what just happened.
Finally, he drew in one more deep breath before turning to look at me. “I’m sorry.”
“What the hell do you have to be sorry for?” I captured his cheeks in my palms. “I just want to know if you’re okay.”
He nodded slowly, huffing out a breath. “I am. I’m just sorry that happened. I never expected it to affect me like that, but I haven’t been back there since…”
He squeezed his eyes shut and the muscle in his jaw throbbed. I let him have a moment to gather himself. When he opened his eyes again he looked steadier. I reached for his hand and gently held it.
“That hill we were driving toward. That was where my sister died.”
I felt an icy chill race through me. Oh my god. No wonder he’d been so upset.
“I… I was driving…”
“Shh,” I said, lowering my forehead to his. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.”
He shook his head. “No. I want to. I need to, I think. I haven’t talked about this with anyone other than my therapist. I think it would be good for me. And…” His gaze softened on me. “I trust you.”
My stomach did a little flip at that. He was admitting he trusted me with something he didn’t share easily. Just like I wanted to do with him by telling him I was a shifter. I felt even more sure that we were headed on the right path now.
“Thank you for trusting me,” I said, softly. “But only if you want to talk about it.”
He nodded. “My sister. She was my twin. The closest person to me in the whole world. Part of my soul, though I don’t know if you can understand that.”
I understood it more than he realized. Because that’s how I already felt about him. Like he was the other half of my soul.
“I was driving her back into town to get some construction supplies—I’d promised her I would fix her deck but I’d forgotten to grab things in town before I went out to her place. Liam wasn’t with us, thank god. It was already dark, and the moon wasn’t out.” He swallowed hard, and I rubbed slow circles on his back.
Another deep breath. “As we topped that hill, my headlights caught a wolf standing in the middle of the road.”
That icy shiver I’d felt earlier was back, now a cold chill deep in my bones. A wolf?
“I swerved to avoid it, just at the top, and I didn’t see the headlights on the other side of the hill. We ran head first into a semi-truck.”
Oh god. My eyes widened and I sucked in a sharp breath. This was so much worse than I could have imagined. I had no idea his sister had been killed in such a horrific way. And from the sound of it, he blamed himself.
“Bryce,” I said, staring intently into his eyes. “You know it wasn’t your fault.”
His lips pressed into a flat line. “Not completely.” He paused, his eyes filling with a mixture of guilt and anger. At himself? At the wolf? My stomach clenched, horror filling me at the prospect. Just the idea that a wolf was involved in the accident… Had it been a regular wolf? Or a shifter? I couldn’t even process the sheer horror of that possibility.
He jerked his gaze away from mine. “We flipped multiple times,” he explained, his voice flatter now. “Ending up in a ditch and eventually slamming into a tree. Lorelei didn’t make it, and now I can barely walk.”
I pulled him to me, whispering his name over and over, and all his pent-up emotions came pouring out. His body shook, this time with sobs as he broke down. I let him cry it out, hoping it was good for him, that getting all of this out there made him feel a little better.
There was so much more he’d had to deal with than I’d realized. He was dealing with guilt, blaming himself for the loss of his twin. My heart pounded. He also blamed that wolf. I could tell. And if it had been a shifter…
How the hell could I ever tell Bryce about myself now?
12
Bryce
3:32
That’s what the glowing red of my bedside alarm clock read.
I didn’t know what had woken me up from my deep sleep. I closed my eyes and rolled from my side to my back. My arm brushed up against warm skin.
Eyes flying open again, I caught my breath when I turned my head slightly and saw Jaxon’s sleeping form next to me. He’d stayed the night?
I didn’t remember him crawling into bed next to me. I really must have been sleeping like the dead. Though it was better than the alternative—staying awake replaying the car accident over and over. Maybe my mind had sought to shield me from it and just shut off.
I tried to recall what had happened yesterday after Jaxon brought me home after my panic attack. I’d told him all about Lori and the accident. Made it clear it was my fault. Then I’d broken down in his arms. All that was clear, but it didn’t explain why he was still here.
I’d seen the look of horror on his face when I’d told him what happened—how Lori had died because of me. Jaxon apparently thought I was to blame too. And I was, obviously. So why was he still here?
Snippets of the day before came back to me. Jaxon going to pick up Liam from school. Making sure he had both an afternoon snack and dinner. Playing catch again in the yard. I remembered Jaxon checking up on me several times through the course of the afternoon and evening. Each time when I wasn’t actually out of it, I’d pretended to be asleep, not wanting to have to see the look on his face now he knew the truth.
I gazed at him again. He was sleeping, his breath shallow, his face relaxed. I took the opportunity to really study him. The wide set of his jaw, his full lips. The dark lashes that rested on his defined cheekbones. I almost reached out to brush his dark waves from his forehead, but then caught myself. I didn’t want to wake him.
My mind working now, I knew I wouldn’t be falling back asleep any time soon. I slid from the bed as quietly as I could, reaching for my cane, then limped out the door. With one final glance at Jaxon, I pulled the door shut then went into the kitchen.
With a heavy sigh, I hobbled to the counter and pulled out a teacup then set the kettle on the stove. Maybe if I drank something calming I might be able to go back to sleep. It might also help settle some of the churning I felt in my stomach, though I wasn’t sure if that was a residue from the nausea I’d felt Saturday or if it was just my nerves.
As I waited for the water to boil I leaned against the counter and squeezed my eyes shut. God, how I wished I could take back everything that happened yesterday. I hadn’t known where Jaxon was taking me, but the minute I’d seen that hill, I’d lost my shit. I hadn’t had a breakdown like that yet, even more than six months after the crash. Just being in the same vicinity shouldn’t have had such an impact on me, but maybe I hadn’t fully worked through my emotions yet.
Well, there was no maybe about it. My therapist had told me there wasn’t much more she could do for me until I was able to open up about what happened and face my problems head-on. While I had to admit that coming clean to Jaxon had felt cathartic, now I regretted it.
Would this make him finally see me the way I saw myself? What if he’d changed his mind about me? What if I’d lost him? I already didn’t understand why a man like him would love someone like me. I’d pretty much written that possibility off, yet here he was. Still in my bed. He said he loved me. That he wanted to be with me, and I believed him, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that something had changed in Jaxon yesterday… That look on his face.
I shook my head as the kettle began to whistle. I quickly removed it from the heat, pouring the steaming water over my tea bag. I turned off the burner, and then made my way over to the kitchen table, lowering myself carefully in case my legs acted up. They didn’t seem to be bothering me much right now, though.
I heard a noise behind me and turned in my chair. Jaxon. He was leaning against the door frame watching me.
“Couldn’t go back to sleep,” I muttered before bringing the teacup to my lips, not caring it was still scalding hot. I needed something to do with my hands, my mouth.
I felt more than heard Jaxon push from the wall and cross the floor. The air around me seemed to thicken with awareness. His mere presence sent my entire body into overdrive.
Pulling out a chair next to me, Jaxon sank into it then reached out for my hand. He wove his fingers through mine, holding me gently. I braced for the worst. Maybe this would be it. Maybe he finally realized he didn’t want to be with me, and he wanted to get it out of the way now. Part of me realized that was ridiculous, especially in light of everything Jaxon had said and done so far. Still, I simply couldn’t get that look of horror on his face out of my mind. With it came a wave of crushing guilt. I didn’t deserve him.
“Are you okay?” he asked softly. A little reserved. A lot concerned.
He studied me closely, his brows drawn together. I took a minute to soak him in before answering. The vulnerable twist of his mouth, his deep green eyes. The strength of his shoulders and arms that belied just how gentle he could be.
Then he reached up with his other hand and ran his knuckles over my cheek. “How are you feeling, Bryce?” A tender smile pulled at his lips.
That wasn’t what I’d expected. After a pause, I shrugged. “I guess I still feel a little nauseous, but I’m not really in a lot of pain, if that’s what you mean.” Not a lot of physical pain, at least. Emotional pain was another matter altogether.
“It’s been several days,” he murmured, his eyes darting back and forth between mine. “You’re still feeling nauseous?”
I nodded. “It comes and goes. Maybe I just caught a bug or something and it wasn’t the heat, after all.”
Jaxon narrowed his eyes slightly. “But it hasn’t gone away completely?”
“No,” I admitted. “I’d hoped the tea would help settle my stomach. Maybe I should eat some crackers or something.”
Out of nowhere, Jaxon grinned, his eyes lighting up.
“What?” I asked, confused.
Instead of answering, Jaxon captured my face in his hands and leaned in to kiss me. He pressed his mouth hard against mine, breathing me in, then released me. I gasped for a breath. I hadn’t expected that.
Then he was up and scouring my pantry. “Ah, here we go!” He came back to the table with a box of crackers. “I’ll be right back.”
He rushed out of the room and I heard him doing something in my room. When he reappeared in the kitchen, he was fully dressed, keys in his hand. He came up to me again and kissed me just like before—hard, animated, determined.
I was so confused. “Where are you going?”
He just smiled. “Just stay right here and don’t move. I won’t be long.”
Then he was gone. What the hell was going on? I sat there for a few minutes, dumbfounded, then decided I might as well finish my tea before it got cold. I managed to get a couple crackers down too, which helped some of the acidic feeling in my stomach.
