Bloodline Contingency: An Urban Fantasy Academy Novel (Bloodline Academy Book 12), page 14
“Potato, tomato,” I said. “Also, I’m human. How is it that I could even do that? How did you know I could do it?”
He plucked at the bond, and it roared with satisfaction. “Haniel’s new vessel is not your first creation, Alessia.”
I couldn’t even fathom it.
In the present, the seraphim circled me like sharks. “Perhaps we should allow Alessia some time,” Raphael suggested.
“She has been missing for over a week,” Michael rebutted. “And now she has returned with that.” He pointed to where Haniel was sitting on the end of the bed.
We were inside Sanctuary. Raphael was doing his best to examine Haniel. From the bewildered expression on Raphael’s face, it wasn’t going well. On his part, Haniel took everything as gracefully as he always did. Only now he did it with a mortal vessel. One Lucifer and I had created for him.
Avahrah. Create.
In the light of reality, it seemed bigger than it had previously. Michael didn’t care how awed I was by what had happened. He was more concerned with what it meant. For the first time, Michael lost his composure. He turned his disbelief on Lucifer.
“You never change,” Michael accused.
Lucifer rose, irritated in the way only Michael could elicit. “Neither do you if you can’t open your eyes and understand that things are different now.”
Michael blew smoke out of his nostrils. Some of the elite guards cringed. “Have you enlightened Alessia about what you were doing in that place before you tricked her into doing this?”
Okay, now this was getting insulting. In the time that it had taken me to heal enough to return, I had put two and two together. Lucifer wasn’t all that complex.
“He’s trying to create himself a new vessel,” I answered. “Seriously, what’s the big deal?”
If we were backed into a corner, and Astaroth destroyed Lucifer’s vessel, having a backup seemed like a good thing.
“The big deal is that we are seraphim. We do not disrupt the flow like this.” Michael paced. “The last time Lucifer dabbled with creation, he made the demonic race.”
Haniel sighed. “I do not feel demonic,” he said.
He didn’t look it either. Or sound it. By all accounts, he looked like a very tall, very graceful version of his essence. He wasn’t classically handsome, and there was nothing noteworthy in his light brown eyes or curly brown hair. On the street, nobody would spare him a second glance. Unassuming was the word I would use to describe him.
Yet there was something so utterly calming and trustworthy in his presence. He sat watch with me the first night while I slept, and not once did I stir. His innate drive as a malachim meant that as a human, I was at ease in his presence.
Michael was not appeased. “You are not at fault,” Michael reminded Haniel.
“So, I am?” I sputtered.
Shaking his head, Michael paused his pacing. “I did not say that, little one.” His ire was all directed at Lucifer. “You go too far, brother.”
Lucifer scoffed. “This was why you couldn’t defeat Astaroth in the first place. This isn’t the heavenly realm anymore. We are not fighting a war of intellectual possibility. If you can’t evolve, we will be lost.”
A storm gathered on Michael’s face. His eyes clouded over. He had always been so stoic. A contained warrior. “If we stoop to Astaroth’s tactics, we are no better than he is.”
Right then I understood why Astaroth would have won the war if Lucifer hadn’t been the way he was.
“Aside from your aversion,” I asked, “is there anything wrong with that we did to Haniel?”
Michael’s mouth opened. He frowned and traded a glance with Raphael. Finally, he grabbed the back of his neck like there was a too-heavy burden on his shoulders. “It is impossible to know the consequences,” he said. “This is not to be tried again.”
He glared at Lucifer. “Have you told Alessia the scale of power it would take to fashion another vessel for you?”
Lucifer’s scowl and my lackwit expression answered him. “There are very few souls that can furnish you with that power. I take it Alessia had no idea she’s one of them?”
That tracked too. Maybe I was just getting too used to shocking news because that didn’t surprise me at all.
After a brief pause, Angus got up from where he was sitting against the wall. “What happened?” he asked. “Haniel says the Hell dimension is closed off?”
Their acceptance of it spoke volumes. I corroborated Haniel’s account. “Death has taken the Hell dimension. Not like Famine did. This time, we have no more control over it.” My gaze flicked to where Haniel was now propped up against the headboard. “Did they…” I thought back to the human he occupied. “Were they experimenting on humans?”
Haniel nodded. “There were sacrifices. My human, the woman, she endured much.”
I gulped. Guilt swarmed me again. I’d taken her soul and used it as fuel to save myself. Haniel rose from the bed. He glided over to me, still as graceful as he had been as an ethereal creature.
“She would have been lost anyway,” Haniel said. “If I had vacated her body, she would have died from her wounds. Her soul would be reaped by Astaroth. At least she was able to give you life before she was destroyed.”
“It’s not fair,” I said.
He nodded. He brushed a strand of hair behind my ear. “Yes. I agree.”
What shut my mouth real quick was when Tyler and Professor Mortimer marched through the door. Both men were subdued.
Professor Mortimer shook his head at the enquiring look Angus gave them. “It’s not just the Hell dimension,” the professor said. “All the barriers that came down during the Wild Hunt are now sealed shut.”
So, this was what it felt like to be an animal in a cage. The elite guards didn’t enjoy it either. Angus turned to me and then reluctantly to Lucifer. “Can you access the other dimensions?”
“Of course,” Lucifer said.
“Painfully,” I admitted.
Angus huffed. “Painfully seems to be the way Death wants us to go.”
Just for good measure, Raphael examined me after he couldn’t find anything wrong with Haniel. Calling it an examination was a bit of a stretch, though. My physiology had always stumped the seraph.
“How do you feel?” Raphael asked.
“The same.” Weirdly, I wasn’t lying. Aside from the shellshock that we had created a vessel for Haniel, I didn’t physically feel any different.
“What of those demons?” Raphael asked. My guilt twinged, but I shoved it down. Since there was no way that I was going to try this again, I couldn’t allow myself to fall into despair about the demons.
The moment I finished that thought, my guilt swarmed me. The bond tried to rise and steady my suddenly overwrought heart, but I shoved it back. Bile clawed its way up my throat. Jumping up, I raced into the bathroom, slammed the door shut, and was immediately sick.
Not much came up besides bitter liquid. I dry retched until I thought my eyes were going to pop out of my head and my intestines were going to explode.
“Alessia,” Raphael called.
Without responding, I teleported to the Sea of Souls. My knees crashed down in front of the flowing river. I lurched forward, palms flat on the grass, and took in heaving gulps of air.
The river ebbed and flowed as though it had a sense that my soul was in complete turmoil. Eyes blinked back at me from calm faces. Though they didn’t speak, I thought I heard their question loud and clear.
Why not me?
It was the eternal question. One I had wrestled with Azrael about more times than I cared to count. This time, when I felt his presence appear beside me, I already had an answer for him.
“I don’t want to lose anybody else,” I said.
Azrael placed his hand on my back, and I knelt there gulping. After I finally managed to calm myself, Azrael asked, “Why do you question yourself now?”
“I have to.”
“Why?”
It was the hardest question in the world, and also the easiest. “Because if I don’t, I’m exactly like Lucifer.”
“What is your answer then?”
I shook my head. He gathered my hands in his. “It is my duty to lay their souls to rest,” he said. “Not yours.”
“But you said I can’t decide who lives and dies.”
“I said what I said because I am who I am.”
His riddle was making my brain hurt. “Michael is who he is. As is Lucifer. Who are you, Alessia?”
“I don’t know.”
“Yes, you do. You are only confused by our expectations. What you want or need is not wrong.”
“I don’t get it.”
He brushed the back of his hand against my cheek. “The beauty of being mortal and human.”
I didn’t see any beauty in it. “This sucks.”
“Does it?” he asked. “You saved a being who has known nothing besides torment for millennia. It is done now. Even if it was wrong, will clinging to guilt help anybody?”
“If I don’t feel guilt this time, how will I stop myself next time?”
Azrael smiled at me. “What stops you from unleashing all the Angelical into the world?” he asked. “You have known how to create from the beginning. Why is this the first time you have contemplated it?”
He cupped my cheeks. “You are not Lucifer,” he reminded me. “You are not me, or Betty, or Hilary.” He squeezed once. “If we have done our job right, you are better. Lucifer might not want to accept that, but I fear Astaroth has. His choice to take Bartholomew as Death is not simply to unnerve you. Perhaps creation is not such a bad thing.”
We sat quietly while I got myself under control. While I wrestled with this burden that was slowly pulling me under.
“I can’t bear children, but I can somehow create whatever Haniel is now,” I muttered, pulling out grass from the banks of the Sea.
Azrael stilled my vandalism. “Humans create their own magic through their offspring. Perhaps this is your way of compensating.”
“Don’t romanticise it! This is messed up!”
Even Azrael couldn’t spin that positively.
When I returned to Sanctuary, most of them were weary from waiting. Some of the elite guards were even snoozing. My return caused them to startle.
“It’s done,” I said to the room. “I can’t take it back.”
His acceptance of it made it slightly easier for me to bear. Hatred slugged me through the bond. I jerked forward only for Haniel to steady me with an arm around my back. Lucifer’s caustic emotions radiated through me.
Haniel frowned. “I cannot protect you from him anymore,” he whispered quietly. Regret laced his words.
In his current form, Haniel was no longer stronger than Lucifer. The devil had also acquired better hearing. His face contorted to perfectly embody the foul stench of his feelings. Even in his heightened state, he still despised Haniel.
“That’s okay,” I told Haniel in my normal octave. “Just knowing you’re safe is enough. What will you do now?”
He raised his head towards the elite guards. “My knowledge of the Abyss under Death’s reign will be useful.”
I didn’t doubt it. Neither did the elite guards. “What do we do about the humans?” Matthew asked. “We can’t get into Hell to rescue the ones in there, and we can’t very well watch over all the ones on earth.”
“What exactly is Death experimenting with?” Ivan asked.
I could tell we were all thinking of Rune. And of the way Death had corrupted Professor Flint. Humans weren’t strong as humans, but as demons…there was no telling what they could do.
Angus leaned against the wall, his muscles locked hard. There was nothing worse to a guard than being unable to protect. Every one of the faction heads had gained their position through power and competence. But they weren’t made for heartless decisions. That was the realm of politicians. Or the Council.
With Lucifer around, there was no need for even that kind of decree. “We must destroy Death,” Lucifer said. “And then we eliminate Astaroth. There is no other way to save the humans. I suggest you all stop lollygagging around this invalid and get back to work.”
The elite guards spat curses behind his back and in his direction. I was the only one game enough to follow him out. He knew it too, because otherwise, he would have teleported away.
“You can protect them,” I shot at his back. “The humans. Shield them so Death can’t take them.”
“Go back to Stormhaven,” he ordered.
Right. Because that had worked so well before. His stride was three times the length of mine now. He widened it even further to make me have to sprint to keep up with him. If I had more strength, I would have teleported. As it was, I couldn’t keep up.
The edges of his physical being frayed. Unable to think of anything else, I caught hold of the bond and tugged. He stopped dead like he’d hit a brick wall. When he whirled on me, his blue eyes were iced over.
Crap! I really didn’t think things through.
Lucifer stepped towards me. His jaw was immovable. “Why on earth would I want to protect the humans? They are less than insects. If they’re stupid enough to give in to Death’s whispers, then that’s their problem.”
“What’s the point then?” I asked. “If everyone is disposable, then what’s the point in trying to save this dimension?”
He cocked his head to the side and sneered. “Who said anything about saving this dimension? I bargained for the heavenly realm. When did I ever mention the earth dimension?”
My breath caught. That bloody bastard. He was right. When he’d told me about his bargain with Astaroth, he’d very clearly left out this dimension. I had just been too preoccupied with the part about him sacrificing me to pay attention.
“Where will I go then?” I asked him. “Clearly I’m not made for the heavenly realm.”
His eyes narrowed. A sick, bitter feeling rose from the bond. I heard a message filtering through it. Leia was a heavenly key. She could exist in the heavenly realm. As a Nephilim, so could Kai.
After I died and Lucifer blooded Leia, they could all remain in the heavenly realm. Smugness permeated my cells. It would have pulled me under if not for the dozens of times over the past month when Lucifer had made it abundantly clear that he would crush Leia’s skull if I wasn’t getting in his way.
Just because I couldn’t have kids didn’t mean I hadn’t been around them. I recognised the signs of a sulk of seraph proportions. Bringing Haniel back had upset him and now Lucifer wanted to upset me. Mission accomplished.
“You are just unbelievable,” I hissed. “Are you really going to let the humans die just because of my friendship with Haniel?”
It wasn’t even just friendship. Haniel was a guardian. I was the human he had chosen to guard. Each of us was playing out a role our natures dictated.
“Loyalty doesn’t allow for diverging interest,” Lucifer said.
“Who said I would be loyal to you anyway?” I yelled at him. The bond corroded against the assault I pushed back at him. Reminders of all the times I had chosen Kai, or Basil, or Azrael over him.
Fury set fire to the aura around him, making it halo above his head. The first points of the Morning Star radiated around him. Lights came on in response in the towers of Seraphina and in the ballrooms.
“You are such a wretched–”
“Maybe,” I said, my temper at its end. “I probably am a wretched little insect with only a speck of your capacity for greatness. But at least I’m not a sad, bitter old seraph whose capacity for love is so tiny that he can’t contemplate sharing it with anybody else.”
There was nothing else to throw at him, so I took off my right sneaker and launched it in his direction. It hit him squarely in the chest because he was standing stock still.
“Alessia,” he said, his voice suddenly stripped of anger.
Too incensed for words, I turned my back to him and teleported back to the Stormhaven dorms.
15
The girls were all in their pyjamas, watching a replay of what happened in the MirrorNet. The angle indicated that someone in the ballroom had taken the footage. Every one of them stared at me wide-mouthed.
“Do you really have to?” I asked them, indicating the mirror. They were still recording. Despite telling them off, I couldn’t help watching the points of the Morning Star wrapping around Lucifer. Even from this far away, the brightness hurt my eyes. The smile on his face, however, was brilliant. Much more beautiful than anything confined to Pestilence. He rose steadily in the sky and then winked out of existence. The loss of his light made the darkness all the gloomier.
Oppressiveness settled over the room. Sophie rose to turn the MirrorNet off. She gave me a small smile on the way back to her bed. “At least you finally admitted it,” she said.
“Admitted what?” I asked.
Diana snorted. “If we have to explain it to you, you’re probably not ready.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Do you want to watch it again?” Isla asked. She jumped up and hit the play button even though I gagged and said no. The sequence began again from the start of where the person had begun recording. Lucifer speed-walked out of Sanctuary, with me following hastily behind.
“Mirror,” Isla asked. “Fast forward to the section where Lex told Lucifer she loves him.”
My heart almost burst out of my throat. “Come again?” I screamed.
The MirrorNet complied. It sped up the image until my screaming face filled the mirror. “…not a sad, bitter old seraph whose capacity for love is so tiny that he can’t contemplate sharing it with anybody else!”
“I didn’t,” I started. “That’s not what…”
Six expectant faces stared back at me in contradiction. “He can’t have…” I kept going. Somewhere along the line, I had sat down on the edge of a bed.
Sophie came over and sat down on my right. Her arm wrapped around me. “It’s okay,” she said. “You can’t help how you feel.”
Winnie blew out a breath. “Yeah, it sucks sometimes. Gaia knows we’ve loved some assholes before.”
