Beatrice and the Beast, page 36
‘Don’t my feelings count?’
‘We must both put our feelings for each other aside and make the best of what our destinies dictate. Please don’t make it harder than it already is. It will break my heart when we have to go our separate ways, but it will be best for both of us. Surely you must realise, I will only hamper your work. I’m not tough like you and will hold you back if you are constantly having to lookout for me.’
For one fleeting moment, anger clouded his face, only to be replaced by resignation as he realised, she wouldn’t be swayed by any promises he made about building a ranch for her and how could he blame her? The early years would be incredibly hard for if she opted to stay with him. She would need to toil alongside him for long hours every day, if they were to make any kind of a success from the venture and it would take years to build from small beginnings. Why would she be willing to throw herself into such an arduous and demanding task when she could walk into instant luxury with Zimmerman?
‘When the chips are down Miss Mellowday, you are tougher than any man I know. You just don’t know it yet. You did what you had to do back there and did it better than any gunny alive.’
‘Killing two men isn’t a feat to be applauded Mister Zelletta.’
‘I agree, but you did what was needed to be done to survive and you did it with great skill, as though you were born to it. Some men practice for years to obtain the kind of skill with a rifle that you possess. Yet to you, it just comes naturally.’
‘It is unlikely I will pick up a rifle ever again after what I did.’
Zelletta resigned himself to losing her and after finishing his coffee, rose from the table and looked down at his beautiful companion in the realisation he was a damned fool to think he would ever have a chance with someone like her.
‘If you’re ready Miss Mellowday, I’ll escort you to your room. Please don’t leave once you are inside.’
She looked up at his set features and saw the disappointment he was trying to hide.
‘have we finished the conversation Mister Zelletta?’
‘I figure there’s nothing more to say.’
‘I’d hoped we may have spent more time conversing as it’s our last evening together.’
‘No point in putting off what’s gonna happen anyhow.’
‘Will you go to a saloon after I have retired?’
‘I thought about it, but after what happened last time, I figured I’d stay close by.’
‘Please don’t let me keep you from your whiskey. I’m not the same naïve girl I was then.’
‘No, you’re not. You’ve come a long way from being the girl I first met in Wichita. You’ll do to ride the river with any man.’
She giggled softly
‘Charlie explained to me about that compliment.’
‘I guess he told you it means you’d make a damned good travelling companion and any man would trust you to watch his back.’
She smiled as he stood behind her chair and pulled it out, allowing her to stand up from the table. Then she impulsively, linked her arm through his as they walked from the restaurant as though they were a couple in love, which, in truth, they were.
FORTY-ONE
Zelletta lingered outside her room full of indecision, for many minutes after she had closed the door. After the exchange they’d had in the restaurant, he felt the urge to head for the nearest saloon and drink a few whiskeys if only to help him forget her for a few hours. Maybe if he got drunk, he would sleep better, free from the vision of her he’d been haunted with every night since they met. But he knew deep down, drinking wouldn’t help, she was in his head and no amount of alcohol would remove her. Truth be known, he enjoyed her presence in his mind every night, it meant he could still look upon her beauty, even though she was just a thought, or, when he finally managed to sleep, a dream.
He decided against having a drink and instead opted for an early night. There was much to do the next morning. If he could find one, he planned to hire a carriage so she could arrive at her destination in style without having to get sweaty and dusty from riding a horse. He felt he owed her that even though it felt he was preparing to hand her over to the devil.
Once in his room, he placed his pistol in a handy position on a small bedside cabinet beside the small oil lamp that was the only other object it held, and stripped down to his underwear. Then, after lying down on the straw filled mattress, he pulled the blanket up to his waist before turning down the lamp so it produced, just a small glow. As usual, her face filled his mind and he revelled in the vision, even though it caused loss of sleep. However, he did eventually, begin to drift away into insensibility, only to become instantly alerted by a light knocking on his door. He propped himself up on an elbow, grabbed the pistol, cocked it and trained it on the door before speaking loudly.
‘It’s open.’
He watched with the pistol held steady and ready to fire as the door was tentatively pushed open. He did not know who or what to expect when it was finally, fully open. But what he did not expect, was Beatrice dressed in a white cotton night dress that reached to the floor, standing perfectly still in the doorway. A lamp that illuminated the passageway also illuminated the girl from behind and there was little doubt, she was naked beneath the gown.
‘What’s wrong?’ He whispered. ‘Are you okay?’
He was shocked when, instead of answering his enquiry, she closed the door behind her and appeared to glide, like a ghost, to the bed, before silently, climbing in beside him.
‘What are you doing?’ He asked incredulously. ‘Has something frightened you?’
‘Put the gun down,’ she replied.’ I want to spend our last night together, with you holding me in your arms.’
She pressed herself close to him and he felt her soft, naked curves melding to his hard, muscular body.
He un-cocked the gun and replaced it on the cabinet.
‘Do you know what you’re asking?’ He whispered. ‘You are practically, naked. I may not be able to control myself.’
‘I’ve never slept with a man before but I know, once we are married, I will have to sleep with an old man who I don’t even love. It will be my duty as a wife to do that and allow him to satisfy his desires. But if I must lose my virginity, I want it to be you who takes it Mister Zelletta. I am very inexperienced in such matters but you are the one I love and I know you love me too. All I ask is that you be patient and gentle with me and help me to learn the experience of what is to come with my future husband. Tomorrow we will part and may never see each other again, but we can have this one night together and remember it for a long time after we do.’
He gazed at her lovely face in the half light from the lamp and was able to make out the small, but apprehensive smile of encouragement she gave him. He enfolded her into his arms and she impulsively, snuggled closer to him and pressed her face into his neck. She seemed so small and tender against his huge muscular frame and he feared, if he held her too tight, she would surely break.
‘We don’t have to do anything more than this if you’re afraid,’ he whispered. ‘I would never do anything that would frighten or hurt you.’
‘Yes,’ she answered. ‘I am afraid. But not as afraid as if my first time would have to be with Jacob. In that case I would be terrified. But with you, I feel safe knowing you love me and will be considerate and gentle. You are the one I love Mister Zelletta and because I love you, I want my first time to be with you.’
FORTY-TWO
Mid-morning the next day, they sat side by side in the two-seater carriage Zelletta had hired and headed south east on the well-worn trail that took them in the direction of Zimmerman’s ranch.
They’d breakfasted later than Zelletta had planned and apart from the odd polite remark and constant surreptitious looks, they’d eaten in relative silence. Possibly, because each of their minds were occupied with thoughts of the previous night and did not know how to express themselves in the cold light of day.
When Zelletta awoke, he’d been elated to find he hadn’t dreamt the occurrences of the night before but nevertheless, found it hard to believe when he felt her body pressed tightly, against his with her face resting on his shoulder. She was sleeping soundly with her steady breathing directing her warm breath onto his neck and despite the feeling of numbness in the arm upon which she lay, he refused to move in case he really was dreaming and she faded away.
By the time she finally stirred and her eyelids fluttered open, he would, under normal circumstances, have been up and about, had his breakfast and been going about his business. Instead, he was languishing in the small bed with an angel snuggling into him and a feeling he was in paradise.
When she finally awoke, Beatrice lay still for a few moments while she came to terms with her situation and when she became fully aware of everything that had happened, she treated herself to a secret smile and her heart began to beat faster as the memory returned and she relived it in her mind. She turned her face upward to look at him and her big brown eyes held his green ones.
‘Good morning Mister Zelletta,’ she whispered shyly. ‘I hope you slept well.’
He nearly burst out laughing at her polite greeting after the night of passion they’d enjoyed. But recognized, that was her way and laughing at her would result in confusion and hurt feelings.
‘Good morning Miss Mellowday. I slept very well thank you.’
After that, they lay in a slightly embarrassed silence, both aware of their combined nakedness, for a very long time. Until, Beatrice finally, broke the silence.
‘I should go back to my room Mister Zelletta, we cannot stay here all day.’
He felt he would love to stay there all day. He would have loved to stay there with her in his arms forever if that were possible. But he recognised nothing good lasted forever and there were things to do before they made the final leg of their journey.
‘I must wrap myself in the blanket so you don’t see me naked Mister Zelletta.’
‘Aren’t you bothered about seeing me naked Miss Mellowday?’
‘I won’t look.’
‘Why don’t you put on your night dress?’
‘I don’t know where it is.’
‘It’s on the floor.’
‘Can you reach it?’
‘No, you were in such a hurry to get rid of it last night, you tossed it across the room.’
She giggled shyly.
‘Oh, Mister Zelletta, please don’t embarrass me.’
He loved the sound of her delightful laughter.
‘I’m just telling it how it is.’
‘Why don’t you get dressed? Then you can pass my night dress to me.’
‘My clothes are across the room along with your night dress.’
‘Oh dear,’ she gasped. ‘What will we do?’
‘I’ll turn away and won’t look while you get your night dress.’
‘Do you promise you won’t look?’
‘Yes, I do and I never break a promise.’
‘Turn the other way then and stay that way until I say it’s alright to look.’
He eased his arm from beneath her and turned over and immediately felt her begin to climb out from beneath the blanket.
‘Don’t look,’ she cried as she hurried across the room.
It took all his will power not to take a small peek. But he managed to control his curiosity and remain looking away. Then after a moment, she spoke.
‘Alright, I’m decent now.’
He turned to face her and even after a passionate night and a long sleep, her beauty never waned. Her long hair was mussed and locks of it fell over her face but she still looked like an angel.
‘You were always decent Miss Mellowday.’
‘You know what I mean Mister Zelletta. Are you going to get dressed?’
‘I will, after you have gone back to your room.’
‘I need you to check that the coast is clear so to speak.’
‘Alright, bring my clothes to me and turn your back.’
She felt it was ludicrous they should feel bashful over their nakedness when they’d recently spent the night together in passionate embraces and had made love for a good part of it. But she complied with his wishes and carried his pants and shirt to him, before turning her back and directing her vision at the door.
…
Because she’d become very attached to the horse and didn’t want to lose him, Zelletta had made Beatrice a gift of the sorrel. He’d attached him to the back of the carriage with a rope and halter and the animal had been quite happy to trot along behind them free of a saddle and rider.
During the short journey, he’d made several attempts to make her change her mind and accompany him on his travels. He recognized he was asking too much of her but had to ask. He knew his assurance to buy some land and build a ranch was a somewhat hollow promise, because if she came with him, he would be unable to receive his fee for bringing her to Zimmerman, therefore, he wouldn’t have enough money to buy land and it would take a few years of bounty hunting before his plans would come to fruition. How could he possibly expect her to travel the west on horseback, for years, facing danger every day while he hunted killers and rapists. Eating and sleeping most of the time in the open air was not the kind of life a woman like her would be able to endure for a long period of time, even though she had adapted very well during their journey from Wichita.
Naturally, though he’d never thought about it before, he was envious of Zimmerman’s wealth and everything the rancher was able to offer the young woman, whereas he could only offer love, hardship and danger. Therefore, because he loved her so much and because of the extreme hardship she would endure if she submitted to his pleas. His overtures for her to go with him, were only half hearted.
When they arrived at the outskirts of the ranch and before they reached the main building, they negotiated a half mile drive along a straight, dirt road with fenced off fields on either side containing many horses. The main house, when she beheld it, long before they came to the end of the road, took Beatrice’s breath away. It was a big two-story building in the style of a Spanish Hacienda and was one of the grandest buildings she had ever seen.
‘Oh, my goodness Mister Zelletta,’ she enthused. ‘I have never seen a more beautiful place. It is like a palace and I cannot believe it will soon be my home.’
‘Yeah,’ he replied sardonically. ‘You should fit in perfectly.’
She heard the bitterness in his tone and instantly, regretted her enthusiasm for the place. She touched his arm lightly.
‘I’m so sorry Mister Zelletta. It was very insensitive of me to be so eager about my new home when you and I have become so close and after what happened last night.’
‘Close?’ Is that what you call it? You told me you loved me. Are you having doubts now? ‘Cos I sure as hell ain’t doubtful about it. I love you just as much as ever. That ain’t changed and never will.’
Tears glistened in her eyes.
‘I do love you Mister Zelletta. That hasn’t changed either and never will. This is very hard for me and I beg you not to make it harder. I will always remember last night and I swear, I will never forget you.’
He briefly, glanced her way and his face was set like granite.
‘Don’t worry Miss Mellowday, I won’t say a word about what happened. I just wanna collect my fee and be on my way.’
‘Oh, Mister Zelletta,’ she cried. ‘I didn’t mean…I wasn’t trying to buy your silence. I would never do that. I simply meant I will be heart broken when we part and your hurt is making it harder.’
They had entered the spacious courtyard by then and Zelletta drove the carriage through the middle archway of three fashioned into a high wall that surrounded the main house. On the other side of the wall was a smaller, tiled courtyard surrounded by the buildings of the main house in the shape of a square. Each section was two stories high with a balcony going all the way round contained by ornate walls. Each of the upper tiers had many windows whilst the lower ones had several doors as well as windows. Each of the highly polished, wooden doors was set inside an ornate archway and as the carriage came to a halt, one of the doors opened and a man appeared, followed by a woman.
Beatrice’s heart was beating rapidly, because she recognized the man immediately. The tin-type picture he’d sent her didn’t do him justice, for, although he was clearly an elderly man, he was far more handsome and athletic looking than she had expected. He stood tall and straight and cut a striking figure in his immaculately tailored, grey pants and vest over a pure white shirt with the pants tucked into expensive looking, leather boots. He was bareheaded and his hair was silver grey and long enough to cover his shoulders with long, thick tresses. His whole bearing was one of superiority which left Beatrice in absolute awe of him.
He made his way purposely to Beatrice’s side of the carriage and as he did so, nodded to Zelletta and spoke curtly.
‘Zelletta.’
Zelletta nodded back but remained silent, refusing to be browbeaten by the man’s air of superiority. However, Zimmerman’s focus was centred on Beatrice and if he noticed Zelletta’s indifference, he didn’t show it. Instead, he went to the young woman’s side of the carriage and smiled up at her whilst offering his hand.
‘Welcome my dear,’ he said smoothly. ‘You are even lovelier than I hoped or envisaged.’
Beatrice wasn’t sure if she should be flattered or insulted but gave him the benefit of the doubt and smiled back while accepting his hand allowing him to help her down from the carriage. But when he pulled her into a tight embrace and placed his lips to the side of her neck, she stiffened and felt very uncomfortable. Whether or not he noticed her discomfort, didn't become apparent because he continued to hold her close while she remained perfectly still with her arms pinned to her sides. However, Zelletta seethed with anger and it took all his will power to turn his eyes away from the scene and come to terms with the fact she was Zimmerman’s intended and he had no right to interfere.
