Seascape, page 23
She heard a thump and a curse, and Tess wiggled out of the compartment. She stood up, rubbing her head, and turned around.
“God, Melissa, you…Oh. Britt.”
Britt wasn’t sure how to interpret her tone. Did she sound pissed? Dismissive? Exhausted after last night’s sex with Karla?
“Hi, Tess.” Her own voice sounded lovelorn. No doubt about it.
“You’re back.”
“Yes.”
This was going well. They had whittled down their conversation to single words. At this rate, it would take them all night to share even simple concepts, let alone the complex one Britt had come here to discuss. She took a deep breath and started again.
“I went to Olympia after I left. I had to sign papers for the grant before the money could be transferred, and I went to Evergreen while I was there. Then I went to Seattle, and then I came here, which was strange because I retraced the route I took when I ran away, but this time I wasn’t quite as shell-shocked, so I saw more than the broken yellow lines.” She paused and took another breath. She hadn’t been shell-shocked this time, but she’d been worried about how Tess would feel about seeing her again. “I even stopped at the Olympic Cellars Winery and bought a bottle of wine.”
For us to share, she added. She’d save that sentence for later, though.
Tess was watching Britt in her usual unperturbed, calm way. “Evergreen has a beautiful campus.”
“Yes, it does.”
Tess looked out toward the horizon with a visible sigh and ran her hand through her hair. “How was Seattle?”
“Interesting. I had a lot of questions and I think I found the answers I needed.”
“Good, Britt, I’m glad. Now, I have more work to do here, and I’m sure you need to get back to the city, so I’ll see you later.”
She left Britt standing in the wheelhouse, unsure what to do or say next. It took her several minutes before she realized what emotion Tess had been trying to hide behind a veneer of nonchalance. Not anger or indifference or a Karla-induced lust. It was fear.
She slowly walked through the narrow door and onto the deck, where Tess was uncoiling and recoiling a rope.
“That looks like an important job,” Britt said softly, standing close behind Tess.
“It’s a high-tech piece of killer whale research equipment. If it isn’t coiled just right, it won’t work.”
Britt saw a hint of a smile on Tess’s face and she exhaled slowly. “Can we sit down for a while and talk, Tess? I’ve made some decisions and I’d like to share them with you.”
“I guess so. Okay.”
They were heading to the bench where Britt had sat on her first boat ride when Melissa and Jake flung themselves out the back door and jumped on the boat.
“A good sighting,” Melissa said, panting. “Not far.”
She and Jake started unmooring the boat, and Tess turned to Britt. “Do you want to wait here? We can talk when I get back.”
“Are you kidding? You can throw me overboard, but I’m not leaving on my own. I want to see killer whales.”
Tess gave her an actual grin this time and went to help the other two. Britt sat on her bench as they motored out to sea. She pulled her thick winter coat tightly around herself as they left the inlet and the breeze turned into a biting wind. Her loose hair whipped across her face.
Tess was back soon, and she sat down a few feet away from Britt. “So tell me about your decisions.”
Britt hesitated. She had imagined talking about her new plans while she and Tess were alone in her cabin, curled up together and sipping their wine. She brushed her hair out of her eyes and decided this was an even better setting because it was a reflection of Tess. And, unless she was prepared to swim back to shore, Tess wouldn’t be able to run away before Britt was done talking.
“While I was walking around Evergreen’s campus, I was looking at the different buildings and trying to decide what department I would choose if I was back in college and starting over. I guess it’s what I’ve been doing all along, looking for one subject or passion to replace the one I was prepared to leave behind.”
Tess leaned closer to hear Britt’s voice over the sound of the boat’s engine and the heavy wind. She wanted to touch Britt. To tuck her gorgeous, wild hair behind her ears. To kiss her and let her know how much she had missed her. To grab her and keep her from leaving ever again. But from the moment she had looked up and seen Britt standing in the wheelhouse, all her old habits had come rushing back. Mask her emotions. Don’t seem vulnerable. Don’t care. She focused on what Britt was saying because she sensed that she needed to feel heard right now, and Tess would do that for her. She’d deal with her own mixed-up emotions after.
“But I realized it’s what got me into this mess in the first place,” Britt continued. “Getting so single-minded that I couldn’t see anything beyond my narrow world. That day in court forced me to look deeper and wider. I knew I needed to change, but I was just trying to find a substitute for chemistry.” She paused and pushed her hair off her face again. “Does this make any sense?”
Tess nodded, understanding exactly what Britt meant because she had noticed Britt had always seemed delighted when she saw connections between subjects, but she had been determined to find only one to pursue.
“Well, after campus I went to the courthouse to sign those papers. I was sitting on this god-awful bench and thinking about trials, and all of a sudden I realized I was only seeing one side of the courtroom in my memory. There’s another side. The ones defending the environment or animals or the people who are trying to protect them.”
“Oh,” said Tess, quickly catching up with what Britt was saying, and seeing the potential it held for her. She would be formidable if she channeled her energy and passion into a career like that. Tess couldn’t contain her grin, even if she had still been interested in trying.
“It’s a great idea, Britt. So how many lists about it have you made so far?”
“Two full notebooks. I’ve even written one about vegetarian options for my sack lunches on school days.” Britt shook her head. “You really think it could work?”
“Absolutely.” Tess put her arm across the back of the bench, wanting to get closer to Britt, but not wanting to touch her until she figured out where she stood with her. Britt might be here just to get her opinion, or to use her as a sounding board. A friend. “What did you do in Seattle?”
“I talked to a couple of people in admissions at UW and Seattle University, and I met with two lawyers who are friends with Cathy.” She hesitated. “I signed up to take the LSAT,” she said in a shy-sounding voice. “If everything goes according to plan, I could be starting classes next fall.”
“That’s a big deal,” Tess said, knowing exactly why Britt’s whole demeanor had changed when she said it. Making lists, meeting with people…those were part of the thought process. Scheduling a test was a physical move forward. “Your first action step.”
Britt nodded, looking pleased at Tess’s statement. “My second was to come here. I had to take at least one on my own first, though.”
Tess realized she was holding her breath and she exhaled. “Seattle is close to Olympia,” she said.
Britt smiled and sat back on the bench until her back was pressed against Tess’s arm. “That’s exactly what I was thinking.”
Tess shifted until her arm was draped over Britt’s shoulders, with her fingers trailing up and down Britt’s upper arm.
“Maybe—if you aren’t too busy with your studies, that is—we could constantly go on long-lasting dates that would be permanent parts of an unending relationship.”
Tess moved a little closer with each word, until she was only a breath away from Britt’s lips.
“Oh, my,” Britt said softly. “That’s a lot of antonyms for temporary.”
“The word no longer exists in my vocabulary, at least where you’re concerned. I’ve replaced it with the word love.”
“I love you, too, Tess.” Britt closed the tiny gap between them and kissed Tess. Tess pulled Britt nearer, one hand tangled in her windblown hair and the other around her waist. Britt put her hands on Tess’s cheeks, and their chill intensified the sensations Tess was experiencing. Elation, arousal, joy. She lost herself in the feel of Britt’s lips and tongue, the hint of citrus mingling with the sea air, the irritating sensation of someone jabbing her on the back.
She turned around and saw Jake standing a few feet away, using the handle of a broom to get her attention.
“What?” she asked, highly annoyed by the interruption. He pointed to port.
“Oh,” Britt said on a long, awed breath. They stood up and joined Melissa and Jake at the railing, watching the rhythmic movement of graceful black fins as they cut through the water.
“Sorry, Jake,” Tess said quietly. He smiled and shook his head, waving off her apology.
“How many are there?” Britt asked. “I can’t tell.”
“Five,” Tess said. “The one in front is the matriarch, and the two with the taller fins are her sons. Then there’s a daughter, with a calf of her own.”
Tess was mesmerized by the sight, even though she had seen similar ones countless times. She could only imagine how it was affecting Britt, who was seeing them for the first time in their natural habitat, especially after the type of soul-searching she’d been doing for the past months. Tess watched as the mother broke the surface with a puff of air and water, followed immediately by the baby’s tiny spray of breath. Over and over, in a beautiful harmony.
She stood right behind Britt and placed her hands on her shoulders. “Look how the pod surfaces and breathes, matching their rhythms to each other. They’re connected instinctively. It’s called synchrony.”
Britt turned her head and looked at Tess. Tess leaned forward and kissed her softly on the mouth. When she pulled away, they both exhaled at the same time.
Britt smiled.
“Synchrony,” she agreed.
Chapter Twenty-five
Britt entered the parking lot of the marine center and pulled into one of the few empty slots. She didn’t see Tess’s car, but sometimes she carpooled from Forks with Cara. Tess wouldn’t be expecting her until tomorrow, and Britt hadn’t called to let her know she was taking a day off from work to give them a long weekend together.
She went inside, waving at the student who was talking to a group of tourists at the reception desk, and followed the jumbled sound of multiple radios into the office. The difference between the Center on her first visit and now still amazed her. Evergreen had descended on the sleepy little lab and brought it to life. At least a half dozen students were wandering through the space, working on computers and making notes on wall charts. She saw another similarly sized group through the back windows, swarming over the Delta Flyer and its equipment. One thing hadn’t changed, however. No matter how much new equipment glistened on tidily organized desks, or how many locals and visitors were now given tours of the lab, the focus was always on the killer whales and other marine life. Learning about them and protecting them. Tess made sure of that.
Britt was about to go through the back door to find Tess when Cara came out of the tiny kitchen, with her hands wrapped around a mug of something steamy.
“Hey, Britt. You’re here early this weekend.” Cara gave her a kiss on the cheek, and Britt caught the distinctive scent of Earl Grey tea wafting from her mug.
Britt grinned. “I wanted to surprise Tess. Isn’t she here?”
“You just missed her,” Cara said, leaning back against the kitchen’s doorjamb. “She came in with the tide at about four this morning, so she left a little early.”
Even better. Britt had been working as a receptionist at an environmental law firm in Seattle while she waited to hear about her admission to the university. She loved her job and was soaking up as much knowledge as she could, but her favorite time was when she and Tess were able to spend weekends together, either on the Peninsula or in the city. She certainly wasn’t going to complain about finding Tess at home rather than at the lab. “I’ll catch her at the house, then,” she said, turning toward the front door again.
“Yeah, okay. Well, good luck, and all that.”
Britt hesitated, caught by the strange tone in Cara’s voice. “Why do I need luck? What’s wrong?”
“Oh, nothing,” Cara said, not meeting her eyes. “It’s just…never mind. You’ll find out soon enough.”
Britt suddenly realized how quiet the hallway was. And nothing was attacking her ankles. She looked around frantically. “Oh God. Where’s Cupcake? You didn’t give us Cupcake, did you?”
Cara gave an indignant gasp. “She’s in the storage room with Jake. He brought a ham sandwich for lunch. And you’d be lucky to have her.”
She marched off in the opposite direction, and Britt hurried out to her car, heading toward Forks and the house she and Tess were renting. Britt loved the old place, even though Tess had nearly hyperventilated when they signed the lease because it was only three blocks from her parents’ home. Britt spent a few minutes of her drive wondering what Cara had been trying to warn her about, but soon turned to the more interesting prospect of the weekend ahead. She’d walk on the beach, challenge Jim and Alec to a Scrabble tournament, and help Tess’s dad install the new expansion pack she’d picked up in the city. Most of all, she’d be with Tess. Britt sighed happily as she parked in the driveway, finally releasing the tension from a busy workweek and the long drive out to the coast.
“Britt? Is that you?” Tess’s voice called from the kitchen when she came through the front door. “I wasn’t expecting…”
Tess halted as soon as she came into the living room and saw Britt. “Wow. Either you were chosen to be the university’s mascot, or you got accepted to the law school.”
Britt glanced down at the clothes she had bought this morning. A purple hoodie with a large gold husky paw on the front, matching purple socks, a baseball cap with UW on it, and a school lanyard. “I got in!”
“Of course you got in.” Tess was beaming as she hurried over and grabbed Britt in a tight hug. “I never doubted you would.”
Britt handed Tess a bag. “I got you a matching sweatshirt, and a…wait, what’s that?”
She pointed at the couch, suddenly understanding Cara’s dire warning. She should have taken it more seriously. “Did you buy a guitar?”
“I did,” Tess said, going over to the sofa and picking up the instrument. She strummed some random notes. “I realized the reason I wasn’t improving was because I only got to practice when I managed to sneak Kelly’s away from her.”
“Right. That’s why,” Britt said weakly. It certainly had nothing to do with Tess’s blatant disregard for music theory and her inability to remember any chord for more than two minutes.
Tess sat down and patted the cushion next to her. “Do you want to hear a song?”
Britt fidgeted with the empty plastic card holder on her lanyard. She wouldn’t mind hearing a song, but she had serious doubts about Tess’s ability to play one. She should just be thankful Tess wasn’t trying to play the drums or a tuba. And thankful that she had come into the house in the first place with a determined plan to distract Tess from whatever she had been doing.
She slipped the lanyard over her head and tossed it next to Tess. “You can play the guitar, or you can come over here and find out exactly how much school spirit I have,” she said, pulling off her cap and letting her hair tumble down to her shoulders. She tossed the hat toward the couch and Tess caught it before it landed. She propped the guitar against the end table and balanced the baseball cap on top.
“I’ve had enough guitar for the day,” she said, getting up and walking over to stand in front of Britt. “I want to play something else now.”
“I was hoping you’d choose me,” Britt said, raising her arms as Tess tugged off her hoodie, revealing a logoed sports bra.
“Every day, every second, every minute I choose you,” Tess said. She cupped Britt’s breasts in her hands and rubbed the pads of her thumbs over Britt’s nipples. When Britt moaned and rocked against her, Tess bent her head and kissed along the top of her shoulder, snapping the bra strap with her teeth.
Britt wrapped her arms around Tess’s neck, loosely enough to give Tess room to reach down and unbutton her jeans. She went still for a moment—even though Tess’s inspection of her UW underwear made it nearly impossible to keep from squirming—and savored the peace of this in-between place. After a long but fulfilling week at work and the thrill of receiving her law school acceptance letter, and before Tess finished undressing her, and she returned the favor. After a long journey to reinvent her life and find her place in the world, and before Tess reminded her that no matter where else she went or what else she did, her true home was right here, in Tess’s arms.
She hesitated in between until she could no longer resist the urge to move forward. She grabbed Tess’s T-shirt and pulled her close with enough force to knock them both off balance and against the front door. Tess laughed, bracing her hands on either side of Britt’s head and kissing her with as much strength and passion as Britt had just shown. When she paused, nuzzling against Britt’s neck and hair, Britt was breathing in short gasps, all thoughts of slowing down and savoring the moment banished from her mind. Tess grinned at her, pressing close and nudging her knee between Britt’s legs.
“Welcome home,” she said.
About the Author
Karis Walsh is a native of the Pacific Northwest, where she finds inspiration for the settings of her contemporary romances and romantic intrigues. She was a Golden Crown Literary Award winner with Tales from Sea Glass Inn, and her novels have been shortlisted for a Lambda Literary award and a Forward INDIES award. She can usually be found reading with a cat curled on her lap, hiking with a dog at her side, or playing her viola with both animals hiding under the bed. Contact her at kariswalsh@gmail.com.
