Burn Baby Burnt: A Second Chance, Age-Gap, Billionaire Romance, page 1
Burn Baby Burnt
K.L Mann
Copyright © Feb. 2022
All Rights Reserved
Intellectual Property of K.L Mann
Author’s Note & TW’s
First of all, thanks for being here! Author’s notes are sort of like, the bane of my very existence. It’s much easier writing as someone else, than it is writing as myself. So I’ll make this awkwardness quick! Burn Baby Burnt, while being my sixth publication, is the first novella I’ve written successfully. And as a lover of all things short and smutty, it’s become a big part of this crazy writing journey. I found writing Jasper and Dixie’s story to be my most difficult project so far. Their story has a lot of plot shoved into your face quite quickly, but I’ve never been fond of patience.
If you haven’t read my challenge night series, there are character crossovers here. Aside from one thing about our Princess Arianna, there are no real spoilers that can’t be found in the blurbs of those stories. To be fair though, if you read the first couple bits of her book, you’d know how her HEA was meant to be. The girl gets what she wants. Always.
If you want to skip the bonus chapter, you can avoid the bit of information. The power is left with you all. So that’s your semi spoiler warning.
Now to get into the good stuff. This book is taboo lite, as I like to think of it. There is a large age gap and forbidden aspects at play.
The TW’s are as follows:
Infertility
Depression
Trauma/Panic Attack due to Trauma
Blackmail/Manipulation
Firearm Use
Casual Discussion of Unaliving
Swearing
Overwhelming Guilt
Now, I would also like to add that this book isn’t meant to weigh you down. There will be aspects that hurt, but the passion is worth the ache.
Happy Reading, Beautiful Souls
To Maddie and Aspen,
for your unwavering love and support. And for telling me my writing makes your day even when I can’t stand to look at it. You will never understand how much meeting the two of you has changed my life. I love you my smutt sluts.
Playlist
Don’t Forget About Me ─ Cloves
See You Later ─ Jenna Raine
Dandelions ─ Ruth B.
Love in The Dark ─ Adele
Falling Apart ─ Michael Schulte
Stop and Stare ─ One Republic
Like I Can ─ Sam Smith
Not Over You ─ Gavin DeGraw
Good Grief ─ Bastille
You Are The Reason ─ Calum Scott
The Scientist ─ Coldplay
Give Me Love ─ Ed Sheeran
Dancing On My Own ─ Calum Scott
Unsteady ─ Erich Lee Gravity Mix
Hold On ─ Chord Overstreet
Say Something ─ A Great Big World
Can’t Help Falling In Love ─ Haley Reinhart
Someone You Loved ─ Lewis Capaldi
Amber Run ─ I Found
A Thousand Years ─ Christina Perri
Home ─ Phillip Phillips
Blurb
Dixie Wallows is practically sweating as she steps onto the Aroselyn Estate property. Her heart aches in a way it has been for three years; punishingly.
Three years have molded her into a cold shell of her old self, but that shell is cracking with every step she takes toward the mansion she once called home, the one she left, leaving her soul behind in her dust.
Sacrifice for love is something she had only ever experienced in movies and nightmares. It quickly became her reality when saving the reputation of Jasper Aroselyn meant breaking his heart and crumbling her own into dust.
And now, now, she was walking into the Lion’s den to… interview him. She wishes she was given a name before accepting the responsibility because she might throw up before she even lays eyes on him, given the circumstances of the newsworthy story.
Her phone vibrates in her dress pocket, and it sure as hell isn’t an email.
It’s him.
Chapter 1: Catalyst
“A flower does not use words to announce its arrival to the world; it just blooms."
— Matshona Dhliwayo
Dixie
Present
The Aroselyn Estate is exactly how I remember it. Beautiful high ceilings, crown moldings, marble sculptures, chandeliers that cost more than my apartment, and staircases that dreams are made of. An airy, light academia feel to every inch of it, perfectly suited for any gala.
Even though it’s familiar, there’s a haunting to it now. It’s not safe or comfortable breathing in the air that settles around me as I force my feet to cooperate and send me past the threshold. Instead, every intake of oxygen feels heavy with regret. I loved living here for the short time that I did.
I loved the man that I shared it with even more.
“Are you okay?” Claire, my boss asks. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost, Dixie.”
I feel like I’m the ghost, walking through the memory of my life.
“I’m okay,” I lie, taking a sip of the champagne she hands me. “It’s just a lot to take in, I feel like we’re intruding even though we’re working.” Another lie. I feel like I’m intruding because this was my home, and now I’m an unexpected, unwelcome visitor.
She dips her chin in understanding. “You’ll feel better when the interview starts. That’s why you’re here, you're by far my best reporter at the moment and the only one willing to interview someone like Aroselyn.”
Yeah, well if I knew who I would have been interviewing before an hour ago, I would have said no. I’d rather interview the mayor again, and he gave me his phone number on the back of a coffee cup. And he’s sixty.
There are tons of fancy businessmen in Belle City, I wouldn’t have even imagined Jasper would be on the list of possibilities for this job. Especially considering I’m interviewing him and his fiancée for their wedding announcement.
Yeah, that part stings.
Fuck, all of it stings.
But I would have known if I didn’t stop meticulously keeping tabs on him this past year. The obsession with him became too consuming and if I didn’t stop following his every move, I would have gone to see him. I would have broken down so easily.
I would have ran back and told him everything, hoping he’d forgive me. Pipe dream, Dixie. You don’t deserve to be forgiven. Not after all of this time.
It’s been too long.
So I couldn’t. Destroying his life couldn’t be my fault. I don’t think I could survive it. The guilt would be intolerable.
“We have less than a half hour before the interview starts, I’m going to use the ladies room and make a few calls to check in on some leads for the Burke story.” I hand her back the half empty champagne glass and slowly make my way to the back of the entrance hall.
Eyes travel with me, sticking to me as I scramble to avoid the ache of it.
Few know who I am, my boss not included. She wouldn’t have brought me here if she were aware. She probably wouldn’t have hired me if she knew.
No one is in the bathroom when I get there, meaning I can take a damn breath and try to calm down.
That is, until my phone buzzes in my dress pocket.
Jasper: What are you doing here?
Fuck. Why couldn’t he have missed me until the interview?
He found my new phone number.
Be cold, Dixie. Keep saving him.
Dixie: Working. Is that a problem?
Jasper: Working for who?
Dixie: Belle City Digest. I’m a reporter now. I can’t get out of this. I didn’t know you’d be the person I’m interviewing until an hour ago.
Jasper: You shouldn’t have come back.
Dixie: I didn’t plan to.
Jasper: Meet me by the fountain in ten minutes.
Dixie: That’s not a good idea.
Jasper: Fountain. Ten minutes. Or the interview is canceled.
Claire needs this. Shit.
Dixie: As you wish.
Shaking out my hands, pacing back and forth a few steps around the room, I’m officially terrified.
Why the hell does he want to see me? He can’t yell at me at a gala, even the fountain isn’t far enough away for that. Christ, I’m going to see his face. I’m going to see his face and have to keep myself from crying.
Forcing myself to get out of my head my neck rolls, releasing some pressure as it cracks. I calm my nerves, trying to push myself into professional mode.
This is my job, that’s all it is. I have to be nice, gracious and polite.
I don’t even bother checking the leads on the Burke case. Choosing to leave the bathroom quickly and head toward the back exit closest to the garden. I know this place better than most, and I could get to our former spot of choice blindfolded if I needed to.
My Aphrodite fountain.
The structure isn’t illuminated and flowing with shimmery water like it always used to be. It’s dark and murky, turned off without an ounce of beauty to show for.
It’s abandoned, like I abandoned him.
The entire garden is. There are dead plants everywhere, crunching underneath the weight of my heels. The only source of light stems from a few lamp posts and some security lights attached to the pool house.
My heart aches, taking in the graveyard
A tear crawls down my cheek before I can stop it.
“Sad, isn’t it?” The buttery voice of my former love creeps up behind me. “It used to be quite a sight out here. Obviously things have changed.” I wipe the tear away quickly, hoping he won’t notice, but he does. “What exactly do you have to cry over, Dixie? You left me. You did this to the garden. You.”
“I don’t know what you want me to say, Jasper.” I can’t look at him and he can’t look at me. We’re standing side by side, staring into the remnants of our lifeless yard.
Our dead love.
A moment passes. Maybe two.
“I want you to admit it,” he growls, grabbing my arms and spinning me to see him. As he meets my eye, I’m given a look into the pain I’ve caused him. Nothing has ever felt worse than facing him here and now.
Jasper is still, deliriously handsome. Denying that would be laughable.
He’s thirty-six now, dressed in the sexiest tuxedo a man could wear. Classic black coat, crisp white shirt, with a solid black skinny tie. His hair is still dark brown and his eyes are pools of caramel that I love more than the candies themselves. His skin is tanned like it always used to be in the summer months. Strange, since it’s February. Jasper is even more fit then he was when we were together, but I knew that. He practically lived at the gym when I left.
“Admit what?” My voice cracks under the pressure of his scrutiny.
“Admit why you left. I know you lied, admit why.”
More pathetic, soft tears roll down my face. “Jasper. I can’t.”
His nostrils flare. “Why the hell not? I’m standing here, right here, asking you. After three fucking years without you, I’m standing here begging you to tell me it was a lie. Tell me, Dixie.”
“It won’t change anything. You’re engaged and your life is better now without me here to mess it up, again. I can’t Jasper, I can’t,” I chant, hopelessly starving to let the truth come out.
“What do you mean? You didn’t mess anything up, not until you left! What are you hiding?” His fingers tighten around my arms, urging me to open up.
He wants to know. He needs to know. Say it.
I–
My mouth opens as my resolve crumbles–
“Darling, are you out there?” a feminine voice calls out. Jasper's hands let me go and I immediately wipe away my tears with the backs of my hands. “There you are, the Chronicle would like a photo– oh, who’s this?”
Lilian Howard, the woman marrying the love of my life. She might as well be a damn supermodel, except she’s not a supermodel, she’s a lawyer and a ridiculously good one. Her short blonde hair is impeccable and her body is enviable.
I throw on my professional voice as fast as I can. “Dixie Wallows,” I say with a smile, holding out my hand. “I’ll be conducting your interview in a bit, I was just on a call when I ran into Mr. Aroselyn. It’s very nice to meet you, I should get back.” I smile again, fake. After shaking her hand lightly, I make myself scarce.
Not even two minutes later, as I’m finally calming myself down in a private hallway, my phone buzzes again.
Jasper: It would make a difference. Tell me, please.
Dixie: I can’t put you at risk anymore. I won’t.
Jasper: What risk? I would have done anything for you. I still will.
Dixie: I did do anything for you.
Dixie: It’s best if we just get through the interview. You’ll never have to see me again after, I swear. You deserve to be happy with her. I’ll see you in our next lives. Maybe it’ll work then. Maybe I won’t ruin it, maybe the garden will survive next time.
Jasper: Damnit, Dixie!
Dixie: I’m so sorry. It’s better this way.
“There you are!” Claire smiles as she finds me, clapping her hands together and rubbing them excitedly. “Let’s go get you set up in the interview room.”
“Sounds good.”
Luckily, this interview should take less than a half hour. Unluckily, some of these questions are going to fucking sting.
It doesn’t take long to set up the chairs and equipment.
“Hello, Mr. Aroselyn, Ms. Howard. I’m Claire Wright, senior story analyst for the Belle City Digest. This is Dixie Wallows, our special interests interviewer.” Claire introduces herself, shaking each of their hands. I shake them both in return like we haven’t met.
Special interests interviewer my ass. I interview hotheads no one else wants to deal with. Why? Because no one else will, and I don’t care enough to argue about it.
“Please, have a seat.” I try to smile and point to the chairs in front of me. My stomach rolls uncomfortably while Jasper looks at me with longing eyes. It’s torture to turn my focus on Lilian. “I understand this will be your first interview as an engaged couple, congratulations.”
“Yes, thank you. I’m very excited,” Lilian says with a sweet smile. She sets her hand in his and I almost choke.
I’m not a violent person. But when her fingers flex around his, I can see myself ripping her off of him and killing her. With my bare hands.
“That’s wonderful, I do have a few non–romantic questions but they are quick,” I promise, looking down at my questions even though they are memorized. I had an hour to prepare but, an hour of memorizing for me is a cakewalk. “Will you be pursuing the position of district attorney in the future? Given the new public image you’ve created with your last few big wins, the people of Belle City are curious.”
“Actually, I’d like to stay out of prosecution for the time being. I’m hoping to move into more pro-bono work, and continue to work as a defense attorney helping the underrepresented members of our community.”
How lovely, she has a heart.
“That’s very important work,” I comment, fixing my eyes to Jasper as the next question is for him. “What would you say to anyone questioning your ability to juggle planning a wedding and your newest business acquisition, Mr. Aroselyn?”
“I’d say it’s foolish to believe that there is anything I can’t handle, Ms. Wallows.”
Dear lord. If only you knew, babe.
“Now for the fun stuff,” I prompt with a halfhearted smile. “I’ve been told you’d like to announce a date for the big day, is that true?”
“Yes, this next Fall. The estate is beautiful when the leaves are orange,” Lilian answers, beaming with a smile at Jasper. He gives her a tight smile in return.
My heart is nearly jumping out of my chest. They’ll be married in less than a year, in our favorite season. Probably in the garden. My garden.
“Wonderful,” I fake excitement, trying to steady my heart. “Of course everyone would like to know if you are planning on starting a family, but I understand you may not be comfortable answering–”
“We’d love children, we’re hoping to have one sooner than expected.” She giggles, wiggling her brows playful. Jasper winces as she says it.
Holy. Fucking. Shit.
She’s pregnant. She’s fucking pregnant.
This can’t be happening. No. Anything but this.
He told me…
He said he didn’t want…
He said that we were enough… he didn’t need...
I’m going to throw up.
“Dixie? Are you okay?” Claire asks from her seat, looking up from her notes.
I can’t breathe.
No, I’m not okay!
“I’m so sorry, I’m not feeling well. Claire will finish the last two questions. I wish you both the best.” I practically fall out of my chair, racing out of the room.
People part ways as I storm through the building, avoiding bumping into any guests. My feet carry me out of the entire fucking building, halfway down the driveway, and then I snap. Tears spill down my face, drowning me in an uncomfortable, stuffy sadness. I don’t stop running, kicking off my shoes like a psychotic Cinderella, making my way down the driveway. I’m going to run all the way home. It’s like two hours driving, but I don’t care.
I. Can’t. Breathe.
This is all my fault.
I did this.
I could have told him.
Three years ago, I should have told him.
Once I’m off the property and outside of the gates, I slip and fall to my knees in the grass, letting a scream rip from my lungs. I scream like I’ve never screamed before. My voice cracks into a million pieces and my chest heaves as I try to breathe. I’m suffocating in my own panic. It feels like something is crushing my throat and all of the air I can get in isn’t enough.
