Aunt Effie's Ark, page 12
“Caligula-Nero-Brutus, Kaiser-Genghis, Boris!” she called, and the dogs came baying down the stairs. “Lick all these plates and pots clean,” Aunt Effie told them. “And make sure you lick them good and dry. There’s nothing worse than finding you’ve put a slice of toast on a plate still wet with dog slobber!”
She looked out the door. “Those asparagus trees are growing over the path. We’ll cut them back hard once they’ve finished bearing.”
Peter and Marie looked at the rest of us, and we knew to keep quiet. When we’d shifted the path, we should have shifted back the row of asparagus trees.
“It must have rained during the night,” said Aunt Effie. “The ground’s quite damp. Our early spuds are doing well,” she said. “And look at the way the kumaras are coming on! I just hope we don’t get any late frosts.”
We looked at each other again. We’d only planted the potatoes and kumaras that morning and already they were up. Some of the potatoes were even flowering.
Back in the house, Marie brought out the pieces of the big carving plate we’d broken playing footy in the kitchen.
“It’s called an ashet,” said Aunt Effie. “Oh, well, I should have got up earlier, but I just thought I’d have a little lie-in this morning.” She had no idea she’d been asleep all winter, we realised.
“That’s not all,” said Peter. “We were playing tiggy in the parlour, and we broke your Royal Doulton teaset.” We held our breath and waited for Aunt Effie to explode. Daisy went “Hmph!”
“I never liked that teaset,” said Aunt Effie. “Those tasteless pink roses painted all over it, and the scalloped lips on the cups so the tea went down your front when you tried to drink out of them. And the silly spout on the teapot that always dribbled. It was a wedding present from Queen Victorious,” she said, “when I married Chief Rangi, or Captain Flash, or the Reverend Samuel Missonary. I can’t remember which. Good riddance to bad rubbish!” she exclaimed. “I’d rather drink my tea straight out of the billy, any day!”
“Tsk! Tsk! Tsk!” went Daisy.
Lizzie opened her mouth, but Becky put her hand over it, and turned Jessie away. We all knew they were going to say we’d met Aunt Effie’s old husbands. “Look!” Becky pointed. In an asparagus tree sat a bird with a greeny-blue back and a silver and white barred chest. It whistled – several rising notes, then a long falling cry.
“The first shining cuckoo,” said Aunt Effie. “Spring’s really here!” The shining cuckoo flew down and dropped a white clematis flower at our feet.
“Pua wananga!” said Aunt Effie. “Another sign of spring.” She sighed. “It seems almost no time since we put the Margery Daw into her winter quarters. What say we catch the Rotorua Express up to Auckland? We could get our oars from Greasy Mick’s fish and chip shop in Freemans Bay, put the dinghy into the water and let it take up while we have a feed of greasies, and row up the harbour tonight. Tomorrow we could be sailing across the Hauraki Gulf.”
“What about the farm?”
“The neighbours won’t mind doing the milking. And the stock can look after themselves for a while. Anyway, we won’t be away all summer. We’ve got to be back in time to make the hay. And we’ve got to put up a new fence round the bull paddock. And there’s the drains to clean, and a new gate to go on the race. But I’d like a good sail first! I don’t know why, but I feel as if I’ve been asleep for months.”
Away up the Matamata line we heard a sound like “Ooowhooooo!”
“Quick!” said Aunt Effie and ran. We followed her all the way in to the station. There she stood in the middle of the railway lines and stopped the Rotorua Express returning to Auckland.
The engine driver leaned out of the cab and shouted something. He had dark lines all over his face, probably coal dust, we thought. The stoker leaned out off the footplate and we noticed he wore his white collar back-to-front.
The guard jumped down, blew his whistle, and said, “The Rotorua Express doesn’t stop here!”
“Nonsense!” said Aunt Effie. “You just did!” She put one hand against the front of the engine and pushed. The couplings jingled, the locked wheels skidded, the whole train went backwards, and the guard turned white.
“All dogs must travel in the kennels provided in the guard’s van,” he said.
“How would you like to be heaved off the train?” asked Aunt Effie. “And what’s that water stain around the carriage walls?”
“We had a flood. That’s where the water came up to before we closed the doors and windows.”
“Well, see it’s scrubbed clean and repainted before we come back. All right, you can tell the engine driver to start.”
The guard blew his whistle, leaned out and waved his green flag, the driver blew his whistle, “Ooowhooooo!” and we all looked at each other.
“Chuff! Chuff!” The Rotorua Express headed fast through Wardville, Morrinsville, and Frankton Junction, the whistle blowing “Ooowhooooo!” at the crossings, steam hissing from the pistons, smoke rolling out of the funnel and across the paddocks.
“I’d like a cup of tea,” Aunt Effie said to the guard.
“I’m sorry,” he said, “but the Prime Minister said people will just have to wait till they get to the dining rooms at Mercer for a cup of tea.”
“I’ve never heard such nonsense. Go and make me a cup of tea in your guard’s van at once!”
The guard saluted, blew his whistle, and scuttled away.
“Did you notice that guard’s strange-looking head?” Aunt Effie said to us. “I’m sure it’s pointed under that silly cap he wears. You know, for a moment I thought he was wearing naval uniform.”
We’d noticed the guard looked like Captain Flash. And the engine driver and the stoker looked remarkably like Chief Rangi and the Reverend Samuel Missionary. But all we could think of was getting to Auckland, catching the steam-tram to Freemans bay, and sitting on the beach and eating a wheelbarrow load of Greasy Mick’s fish and chips while the dinghy took up. Then we’d row with the tide up the harbour and have a look at our scow, the Margery Daw, and see how she’d survived the winter.
“Look!” said Lizzie. There on the horizon, we could see the peak of a hill. And right on top of it was a single tree.
“One Tree Hill!” said Aunt Effie. “That means we’re almost there! Have you all been to the dunny? You know you can’t go once we’ve stopped in the station?”
“Yes!” we said because we’d been going to the dunny all the way to Auckland. Alwyn had told us about a little boy he knew who slipped down the hole when he flushed the dunny on the Rotorua Express, and he was never seen again. So we’d tried pushing each other, but nobody was small enough to go down. We were disappointed and told Alwyn he was just making it up.
“You should really be wearing shoes,” said Aunt Effie looking at our bare feet. “Auckland children all wear shoes all the time.”
“I’m wearing my best shoes!” said Daisy.
“Shoes best my wearing I’m,” said Alwyn, and we all stood on our seats to be first to see the sea, and the Hauraki Gulf, and Rangitoto, and the Coromandel Peninsula faint blue and far far away like
Daisy’s Glossary
“I wrote this glossary so everyone would know what the difficult words mean. Whenever I come to a word I don’t know, I look it up.” —Daisy.
“For goodness’ sake, Daisy! Why don’t you just tell people to keep reading the story. I never understand half of what I read, and it’s never done me any harm. Now, don’t go getting the sulks. And, if you’re going to write a glossary, let everyone have a go at it.” —Aunt Effie.
“Humph!” —Daisy.
“Hpmuh!” —Alwyn.
adze a tool like an axe, but with the blade set at right angles, handy for shaping masts and spars
afghans crunchy dark biscuits made from cocoa “A racist term!” —Daisy. “Pakehas are crunchy pale biscuits made from white cocoa.” —Alwyn.
alleys big glass marbles “Good for smashing dubs!” —Jared.
baron a huge joint of beef, two sirloins joined at the backbone “Yummy!” —Isaac.
Barry Crump a famous deer culler and writer
bilges where water collects in the bottom of a boat “They talk bilge in parliament.” —Jane.
block a sailor’s term for a pulley “Blockhead – another name for Daisy.” —Alwyn.
blunderbuss a short gun with a huge barrel firing barbed wire, broken glass, and bent nails “It’s hard to miss with a blunderbuss.” —Casey.
bob old money for ten cents
bobstay a rope that holds down the bowsprit “So a Lizzie-stay must be a rope that holds down Lizzie.” —Jessie.
boohai a remote place “Like the Vast Untrodden Ureweras.” —Ann.
boom a spar to which the foot of a sail is fastened and stretched
bowse to haul down “Not to be confused with booze.” —Jazz.
bowsprit a spar that sticks out from the bows
brail to truss up a sail so it doesn’t catch the wind
breeches buoy canvas harness hanging from rope, for pulling somebody from ship to ship, or to or from the shore
buggers afloat fried scones “Yummy!” —Victor.
bulkhead a wall inside a ship or a plane “Someone with a big head.” —Isaac.
bulwarks the sides of a ship above the level of the deck “Something that bulls do.” —Alwyn.
camp oven a heavy iron pot you can hang over the fire, stand in the ashes, or bury in the embers. It boils, bakes, roasts, fries better than any stove. “I got my muscles lifting the camp oven off the fire.” —Jazz.
capstan a vertical drum around which ropes and chains are wound to raise and lower heavy weights such as the anchor
caulk to stuff the cracks between planks with watertight material
chamfer to shape the edges of planks so they fit together snugly
Chinese gooseberry the correct name for kiwifruit
chook the correct name for a hen “Casey’s a chook!” —Jared.
chopper boys helicopter deer hunters
chutty chewing gum “My tongue makes a noise like “chutty” when I’m chewing gum.” —Lizzie.
clench to fasten something firmly “Daisy clenches her teeth at us.” —Ann.
clinker overlapping planks
clotted cream thick yellow cream made by scalding milk “Yummy!” —Jane.
cocky a farmer
cocky’s joy golden syrup “Yummy on buggers afloat!” —Isaac.
cod-end the bottom end of a trawl net with an opening through which fish are released on deck
companionway ship’s staircase between decks
condor a very big South American vulture
crimp to make pleats with a hot iron
cross-staff an old instrument for finding the sun’s altitude
cuirass armour covering the chest and back “Useful for playing softball.” —Lizzie.
cuts the strap “Mr Jones just pretends to give us the cuts.” —Casey.
daisy “A tough flower that’s always having swounds.” —Alwyn.
Dead Man’s Ears dried apricots
Dead Man’s Eyes sultanas or currants
dodo an extinct bird with stumpy wings that were too small to make it fly “Daisy’s a bit of a dodo.” —Alwyn.
Doldrums a large part of New Zealand
dolphin striker a short spar sticking straight down under the bowsprit “People shouldn’t strike dolphins!” —Jared.
dub small clay marble easily smashed by an alley or a steelie
fid like a marlinspike, a pointed tool to separate strands of rope when splicing; also, a wooden pin
flute to make folds like grooves with a hot iron
fly-camp an overnight or makeshift camp
fo’c’sle or forecastle the raised part at the bows of a ship, and the cabin underneath in which the crew used to live
fore-and-aft rig sails set lengthwise on the ship
forestay a supporting rope from the foremast to the bowsprit
frap to tie down “I’ll frap you kids if you won’t sit still!” —Aunt Effie.
gallows a steel frame holding a block over which a trawler’s wire ropes run down to the net “They hang murderers on gallows.” —Victor.
gammon to fasten “It also means a smoked ham. Yummy!” —Casey.
genealogy the study of a family’s history “Fun, but about as reliable as palmistry, reading the teacups, and horoscopes.” —Aunt Effie.
glassies glass marbles
glut a wooden wedge
goffering iron an iron heated to crimp and flute frills and pleats into lace
greaves armour covering lower legs “Good for playing hockey.” —Jessie.
greenheart a tough, green-coloured American timber used in shipbuilding
gudgeon a socket the rudder pintle fits into; together they hold the rudder to the stern and let it turn
halberd keep reading and you’ll find a description of one
Harry Wakatipu a lazy, thieving packhorse “A noble beast!” —Harry Wakatipu.
headsails sails ahead of the foremast “But footsails are not behind the mast.” —Jessie.
heel the bottom end of a mast, sometimes called the foot
hibernate to go to sleep for winter “Who said I hibernated?” —Aunt Effie.
huhu a delicious grub found in rotten logs “Yummy!” —Casey. “Yuk!” —Daisy.
huia an extinct New Zealand bird that was hunted for its beautiful white-tipped feathers
insomnia sleeplessness
jib-boom a spar that lengthens the bowsprit “A bit like Pinnochio.” — Jazz.
jill to move idly to and fro in a boat “What’s to jack and jill?” —Jack.
kauri a very big, beautiful New Zealand tree
kedge a small anchor for pulling off a grounded ship
keepsie a marbles game where the winner keeps the loser’s marbles “Good fun if you’re winning.” —David.
kike kahikatea, white pine, a New Zealand tree
kingaseeny a playground game
konaki a horse-drawn sledge
kudu an African antelope with spiral horns “Like Dr Dolittle’s pushmi-pullyu, but with only one head.” — Jessie.
Lane’s Emulsion an awful patent medicine that looked a bit like condensed milk but didn’t taste anything like it “Yuk!” —Bryce.
latitude position on earth measured north or south of the equator
leery sly, suspicious
lubber’s hole a hole in the platform around a mast – used only by lubbers “Real sailors climb upsidedown over the edge.” —Aunt Effie.
maire heavy, dense New Zealand wood, hot and slow burning “Your head’s as dense as a bit of maire.” —Mr Jones.
marlinspike a pointed tool for separating strands of a rope when splicing
maul a bushman’s wooden headed hammer for driving wedges
missionary someone who wants to tidy up other people’s lives “Daisy is a missionary.” —Alwyn.
mizzen-mast the mast nearest the stern
moa a large, flightless, extinct New Zealand bird that was hunted for its meat “I’d like to eat one.” —Jane.
Ned Kelly a famous Australian prime minister who wore a home-made suit of armour
nikau a New Zealand palm
Number One a pee
Number Two a poop
oakum caulking made from old ropes soaked in tar
Parrish’s Food a dreadful patent medicine with a furry taste “What you all need is a good dose of Parrish’s Food.” —Daisy.
Pinocchio a boy whose nose grew longer every time he told a lie “A bit like a jib-boom.” —Jazz.
pintle a vertical pivot for the rudder; with the gudgeon, it works like a hinge
plough-line light rope used for the reins of a plough
plum duff rich boiled suet pudding with raisins, spices, currants and anything else you want to put in “Yummy!” —David.
port left side of ship looking ahead
pound old money for two dollars
puku belly
purchase a tackle rigged to lift something more easily
quid a pound in the old real money before dollars came in
ran-tan a disorderly riot; to go drinking and whooping it up “A lady does not go on the ran-tan!” —Daisy.
ratlines a ladder of ropes up to the masts
reeve to thread a rope through a block
rewarewa a New Zealand tree, also known as the honeysuckle tree
ricker a long, slender tree trunk
rimu red pine, a New Zealand tree
roc an enormous bird in old Arab stories “I saw a roc pick up an elephant and a whale and fly away with one in each claw.” —Alwyn.
royal the sail above the topgallant
scalded milk milk brought almost to the boil
scalloped wavy edged
scow a flat-bottomed sailing vessel built in New Zealand from 1873 to the 1920s for the coastal trade “Read Aunt Effie, and you’ll find out how to build and sail one.” —Marie.
shanty a sailors’ song to make pulling and pushing and lifting easier
schenam creamy mixture of whale oil and shell lime that keeps teredo worm from eating wooden ships “I fell into a barrel of schenam, and Aunt Effie said I’d be safe from the worm.” —Lizzie.
sheerlegs a tripod of three poles fastened at the top and carrying tackle for raising and lowering heavy things
skillion a lean-to part of a barn or shearing shed “Not to be confused with scullion.” —Daisy.
skim dick skimmed milk left after the cream is separated. “There’s a thin boy at school everyone calls Skim Dick.” —Jessie.
snarlers sausages “The best ones snarl and bark in the frying pan.” —Jared.
snatch-block a pulley with a hinged opening for inserting the bight or loop of a rope instead of its end “Handy when you’re in a hurry.” —Peter.
