Building Blocks (By Design Book 7), page 16
Candace felt the knot in her stomach tighten measurably. She braced herself for the rest of Laura’s inevitable story, hoping that she was wrong about the direction it was about to take.
“He was almost thirteen then. I knew if I told anyone he would make it worse, so I didn’t.”
Candace nodded. She watched as Laura’s eyes filled with tears and Laura’s posture slumped in despair. “Take your time,” Candace encouraged the young woman.
“Mark...I finally told my mother,” Laura said. “At first, he just came into my room at night. But…Well, when my mother started going out more, I was about twelve, Mark was seventeen, almost eighteen—then he started…He was in charge, you know? I would get home from school and he would be waiting.”
Candace sensed Laura’s difficulty in continuing. “I think I can imagine,” she told Laura gently.
Laura looked at Candace and the pleading in the young woman’s eyes nearly broke Candace in two. Candace reached out and pulled the young woman into her embrace and began to rock her as Laura’s tears overflowed. “I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” Candace said.
“I told my mother,” Laura choked through a sob. “She told him—my father,” Laura continued.
Candace sighed and held Laura protectively. “You did the right thing telling her,” Candace said.
“No, I didn’t. He didn’t do anything,” Laura wailed. Candace closed her eyes as the waves of pain rolled off of Laura. “I heard them arguing,” Laura explained. “He told her that I was exaggerating. He was sure of that. Mark…. Mark was the star,” Laura sobbed. When my mother challenged him…”
Candace readied herself. “It’s okay if you need to stop.”
“No, I want to tell you…I need…”
“Okay,” Candace tried to reassure Laura. “Just slow down. I’m not going anywhere.”
“He told her that I was like her. She was unreasonable and overly dramatic. She yelled back and he…He hit her or he pushed her—hard. I know he did. I heard her hit the floor and her cries,” Laura finally managed to get the words out. “After? It was worse, like he wanted to punish me for telling. The only reason he stopped was that he went away to college,” Laura said. “I made sure not to be home when he was.”
Candace continued to rock Laura gently. She mentally processed the information. “I’m so sorry,” Candace said genuinely. “That you had to go through any of that.”
Laura collapsed into Candace gratefully. “I’m so sorry.”
“Sorry? Sweetheart, why are you sorry?” Candace asked.
“If it weren't for me, he wouldn’t be trying to hurt you so much.”
Candace pulled back and directed Laura to look at her. “Laura, what your father does through FVI…When it comes to me and to my family—that started before you were even born, honey. Please, listen to me. You have done nothing wrong, not then and not now.”
“I want to tell them,” Laura said.
“Tell who, what?” Candace wondered.
“Do an interview, tell someone how he is—who he really is. I want to help you.”
Candace sighed. She wiped the tears from Laura’s cheeks and shook her head. “No, sweetheart, you don’t. Just listen,” Candace said when she saw Laura ready to protest. “Don’t put yourself through that. Have you ever talked to anyone about this? What happened with your brother?” Candace wanted to know. Laura shook her head. “Mmm. No one?”
“Just when I told my mother, but we never talked about it. We never really talked much after that. She barely looked at me to tell you the truth.”
Candace nodded. She guessed that Laura’s mother had been suffering from guilt and fear—guilt that she had been too fearful to protect her daughter. It made Candace wonder what kind of man Lawson Klein truly was. She had always deemed him a bigot and she had long regarded him as arrogant and selfish. Candace knew that Lawson Klein and FVI were willing to play dirty, even resort to violent tactics. While the group had never been directly implicated, FVI had been linked to several violent protests and abortion clinics. More than once, someone equated with FVI had been arrested for an assault on someone affiliated with a women’s health clinic, and most recently a man who had beaten a transgender teen in Ohio had been linked to the group. Family Values International always publicly distanced itself from any such incident. Whether or not FVI directly involved itself in the incidents was debatable. It was evident that FVI held influence over many of the people who propagated such attacks and protests.
Lawson Klein was technically the Media Director at Family Value International. It was a well-established fact that the Klein family had bankrolled FVI’s beginnings and continued to be one of its most lucrative sources of funding. Lawson Klein’s influence went far beyond the scope of press releases and interviews. He was not simply the face of FVI; he provided the fuel for its engine. Laura’s revelations did not so much surprise Candace as they did dishearten her further. The idea that any parent would allow their child to suffer to save public face disgusted Candace beyond description.
Candace let Laura continue to cry in her arms. “Listen to me now, okay?” Candace said. “You let me fight this fight. I’ve told you before; I know that it is not the same. I do know that, but you are part of this family, and I want you to remember that.”
Laura continued to cry uncontrollably. “I’m horrible,” she croaked almost inaudibly.
“Why would you say something like that?” Candace asked.
“I wish you were,” Laura mumbled. I love my mom,” Laura said.
“Of course, you do.”
“But, sometimes I wish you really were my mom,” Laura confessed.
Candace understood Laura’s feeling and the sentiment perfectly. Candace loved her mother but she had never felt the bond to her mother that she had felt instantly with Pearl. And, Candace had seen that in Jonah with Jameson. He loved his father and he had liked Jessica, but Jonah and Jameson shared a bond that went far beyond friendship or step-parent and step-son. He regarded Jameson as his parent and Candace was positive that as strange as it might have seemed to some people, Jameson felt exactly the same way. She kissed Laura on the head as her thoughts turned to Cooper. Candace and Jameson had not given birth to Cooper. They had not been the ones to care for him the first few years of his life, but Cooper was every bit as much their son as The Three Stooges, as Candace affectionately referred to her children. And, Candace had no doubt that in Cooper’s mind and heart she and Jameson were his mothers.
“You know,” Candace began. “Families are really what we make them,” she told Laura. “I understand. I love my mother. She’s my mother. But, Pearl? Pearl is truly my mom. Whether I skinned my knee or had a broken heart, Pearl was always the person I sought. She still is.”
“But, you’ve known Pearl forever.”
“True,” Candace said. “Rick was my son—as much as Jonah or Cooper or Lucas,” she said lovingly. “Cooper asked Marianne if he could have three mommies,” Candace told Laura.
“Not really the same,” Laura said sadly.
“No?” Candace raised her eyebrow. She smiled at Laura and directed Laura to look at her. “I think it is exactly the same,” she said. “In some ways that makes it all the more special. I chose Pearl. Pearl chose me. My kids all got me. Rick and Cooper, they chose me. I chose them. Just like I choose you,” Candace said. Laura fell into her again, a new wave of emotion overtaking her. “Love doesn’t have limits, Laura. You can love as many people as you choose, and in my experience when you love someone, you will always love them. That doesn’t mean that they are beside you forever. Things separate us—our choices, their choices, even death. You don’t have to stop loving one person because you find refuge in another.”
Laura held onto Candace and Candace let the young woman cry out all of her tears.
“Would it still be okay?” Laura asked hesitantly.
“Would what be okay?” Candace asked.
“You said once that if I wanted to, I could call you Mom,” Laura’s voice dropped.
Candace felt the warmth of a tear bathe her cheek. “I would be honored.”
***
“Want to talk about it?” Jameson asked Jonah.
Jonah nodded and accepted a beer from Jameson. “J.D., I don’t know how to help her sometimes.”
“Laura?”
“Yeah.”
“Maybe the best thing you can do is just listen,” Jameson offered.
“If I didn’t think it’d destroy her, I would beat the shit out of them.”
“Her father?”
Jonah nodded again. “And Mark.”
“Her brother?” Jameson asked for clarification.
“J.D….”
“What is it, Jonah?”
Jonah shook his head disgustedly. “He touched her, J.D. Not once either. Often. From the time she was small until he left for college.”
Jameson’s pulse immediately picked up its pace and her ears began to ring. “What do you mean he touched her? Mark? You mean he abused her?” she asked. Jonah sighed and nodded.
Jameson felt her stomach flip and pushed back the urge to be sick. Abuse was something that Jameson understood from a unique perspective. She had been a naïve teenager and had begun dating a young man three years older. He had made the decision for both of them that it was time to be intimate. Jameson had protested but fear forced her into submission. It was an experience that still haunted her at times. She had struggled with intimacy and trust for years. Candace was the only person Jameson had confided in about the experience. And, it was Candace who had gently nurtured and reassured Jameson when memories surfaced. Jameson took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
“J.D.?”
Jameson smiled at Jonah as best she could. “All you can do is listen and keep assuring her that she is safe with you,” Jameson said. She saw Jonah’s unspoken question and addressed it. “I can’t even imagine one of my brothers doing that,” Jameson said. “And, I can’t…. Well, it’s bad enough when you are old enough to understand.”
“J.D…”
“I was a teenager, kind of a naïve teenager. He was older. I thought…. Well, what I thought doesn’t really matter. He had different ideas.”
“He…”
Jameson nodded. “What I can tell you, Jonah is that no matter how many times I’ve told myself that it wasn’t my fault, no matter how many days or weeks pass that I don’t think about it. Eventually, something brings it back. It never goes away. You learn to move through it. You learn that it can’t define you or conquer you, but it is part of you—part of your life.”
“Does Mom know?” Jonah asked.
“Yeah, she knows. And, Jonah, the fact that Laura told you…It means she truly trusts you, not just that she loves you. Your mom is the only person I have ever talked to about what happened to me…Well, until now.”
“You didn’t have to tell me,” Jonah said honestly.
“No, but I trust you, and I think maybe…Maybe I can help you understand how she might be feeling.”
“I hate them, J.D. I hate them for hurting her, for what they have said about Mom …Now, for doing something that might hurt Coop. I hate them.”
Jameson nodded. “You’re angry and you have a right to be angry. I get it.”
“No, J.D., I’ve never hated anyone. I swear to you, Lawson and Mark Klein? I…”
“Jonah,” Jameson gentled her voice. “I understand how you feel. Believe me, when I tell you—I do. You need to let that go. That’s not what she needs.”
Jonah rubbed his hand over his face in frustration. “When will it end?”
“I don’t know,” Jameson replied honestly. “You have to trust us now, okay? Let your mom and me handle Lawson Klein.”
Jonah looked across the table at Jameson and closed his eyes. “It’s not your job to defend…”
“We’re your parents. It is our job,” Jameson declared without hesitation.
Jonah opened his eyes and finally let the hint of a smile show on his lips. “Weird, huh?”
“A little,” Jameson admitted. She laughed. “Never thought I’d be anyone’s momma.”
“You’re pretty good at it, you know?”
Jameson shook her head. “I have no idea what the hell I am doing most of the time,” she confessed.
Jonah laughed. “Me neither,” he said. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“Being married…Are you glad you and Mom got married?”
Jameson tried not to laugh. “Caught the bug, huh? First Shell, now you.”
Jonah shrugged. “I just worry.”
“About?”
“Being a husband. I mean, poor J.J. is stuck with me. Laura gets a choice.”
“Seems to me that she has already made it,” Jameson reminded Jonah.
“Were you scared? Asking Mom, I mean?”
“Terrified.”
“Did you think she would say no?” Jonah wondered.
“No, not really,” Jameson answered. “I wanted my proposal to be perfect, you know? Memorable. Your mom is…Well, I wanted it to be perfect.”
“It was,” Candace’s voice replied.
Jameson looked up at Candace, who was smiling in the doorway. Jonah turned in his chair and Candace smiled at him.
“Mom?”
“She’s okay,” Candace told Jonah. “She needs you right now, though. She went upstairs to wash up,” Candace explained.
Jonah nodded and hopped to his feet. He stopped and hugged his mother. “Thanks, Mom.” Jonah turned to Jameson. “I don’t know what we’d do without you—both of you,” Jonah said sincerely.
Jameson smiled. “You’d pay for babysitting,” she teased.
Jonah chuckled and nodded as he left the room.
“So? Am I guessing we will be paying for two weddings soon?” Candace asked.
“If I liked to gamble, I’d say the odds were good,” Jameson said. She pulled her chair out and Candace moved to sit in Jameson’s lap. “Perfect, huh?” Jameson asked.
Candace leaned in and captured Jameson’s lips in a tender kiss as her reply. She let her head fall against Jameson’s gently as their kiss broke and sighed.
“You’re not going to let this one go,” Jameson said knowingly.
“I can’t this time,” Candace said. “They’ve done too much damage. At least, without FVI, it will be harder for him to be heard.”
Jameson sighed. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”
“I never enter a battle that I can’t win, sweetheart.”
Jameson kissed Candace sweetly. “You are not in this alone.”
“I know. That’s why I can do it,” Candace said.
“You really think you can take down FVI? Candace, they have a lot of money and a lot…”
“And, more skeletons than a graveyard, Jameson. Trust me on this.”
“If you’ve known that all along, why now?” Jameson asked.
“You think that I haven’t been working on this all along?” Candace laughed. “I have. Many people have. It takes time. I’ve just stepped up the pace. The less airtime Lawson Klein and his hate mongers get, the better. I don’t have the luxury of time anymore,” Candace said. “Not when he targets my children.”
“I know. I just worry about Laura.”
“So do I,” Candace agreed. “Jameson…”
“I know,” Jameson guessed where Candace was turning their conversation. “I told Jonah…About me, I mean. I’ll talk to her.”
Candace smiled compassionately. “Only if…”
“I’m fine,” Jameson promised. “I have you.”
“Yes, you do.”
“I love you, you know?”
“Yeah? Enough to go get Chinese?”
Jameson rolled her eyes. “Yes.”
“Really?” Candace was surprised.
“Yeah, Jonah loves Chinese take-out. I’ll get you some soup.”
“Soup?” Candace asked indignantly.
“Yep. Soup. If you behave, I’ll get extra fortune cookies.”
Candace arched an eyebrow? “Why? Hoping your fortune will predict you will get lucky?”
Jameson moved Candace off of her lap. “I don’t need Chinese for that,” she said as she made her way to retrieve her coat. She opened the back door and looked back at Candace. “Besides, I know where your stash is anyway.”
“You do not!”
Jameson shrugged and gloated as she stepped through the door.
“Jameson!” Candace went to the door and called after her wife. Jameson waved without turning around. “She does not,” Candace muttered.
“Hey, where is J.D. going?” Marianne asked as she entered the kitchen.
Candace shook her head and started laughing. She turned back to Marianne and smiled. “Lunatics.”
“What?” Marianne asked.
“Nothing. Nothing a little Chinese food can’t cure.”
Marianne was puzzled. “Okay….”
“Come on,” Candace gestured to her daughter. “Sneak me a small glass of wine before she gets home.”
“Mom!”
Candace waved off her daughter. “I’m over twenty-one.”
“And on antibiotics.”
“Want that free babysitting to continue?” Candace teased.
Marianne laughed. “One small glass.”
***
“I really don’t think it’s a good idea,” Michael Weller offered his unsolicited opinion.
Lawson Klein took a sip from his coffee cup and shrugged casually. “What’s wrong? Starting to like the governor?”
“I’m more concerned with how some people might perceive this where Laura is concerned.”
“I told you, she made her choice.”
“Lawson, I am telling you that you are rolling the dice pushing this. Laura is still your daughter. A lot of our donors have expressed some concern in your dismissiveness. She is your daughter. You do remember what FVI stands for?” Weller challenged.
“I ought to. My father funded it.”
