Music of the Heart, page 17
“I’m sorry but I’m pretty sure you aren’t in control of me. Oh wait, at least not in this part of my life.”
I turn around and storm off down the stairs. The girls are fast on my heels. When we get to the bottom of the steps, Ava stops us.
“Okay, just wait a minute. What in the hell is going on?”
Merritt fills the other three in on my situation and they are equally as pissed as I am. Of course, Laken is always the voice of reason between everyone so she has something to say in his defense.
“Ashleigh, I know what he did wasn’t right and he should have talked to you first but we can all see he loves you and he was just looking out for you. None of us want to see you damage your voice anymore than you already have. You know you need time to heal or you will be stuck working with us at Bello forever.”
“I get I need to rest but he’s such a liar. He has kept so much from me and going behind my back to the record label is unforgiveable.”
I lead the girls to the dance floor downstairs and security is hot on my heels. They know I’m supposed to be in the VIP area and they aren’t very happy with me. I grab a shot from the waitress walking around with them and turn to look at the security guards.
“Look boys. I know I am supposed to be upstairs right now but last time I checked, this was a public place and I am part of the public so I am going to dance down here no matter what. You can stand and watch me all you want and if things get out of control, you are more than welcome to throw me back upstairs.”
Grabbing yet another shot, I head to the bar and order a beer. The girls all order one as well and then the guitarist from the band on stage comes over and asks me if I would like to sing. Why the hell not? Let me end this amazing night on a high note at least!
I look at the girls when he asks and even though they know I shouldn’t, they all get grins on their faces and start nodding their heads. Ava looks at me and starts chanting my name.
“Ashleigh, get your ass on that stage and show Cross exactly what you think of him.”
I jump on stage and start singing and as I glance upstairs, I’m pretty sure you can actually see fumes coming from his ears. Job well done. I have pissed him off royally. I am singing my heart out and when I glance back up again, he’s gone and I see him bolting down the stairs with Dixon right behind him. Out of the corner of my eye, I also notice Thomas and my own personal security, Q, who has been there all night.
The song ends and I jump off the stage after I high five the band. The bartender has another beer waiting for me when I get down and I start chugging it because I am pretty sure all hell is about to break loose. I hear the growl before I see his pissed off face.
“What in the fuck do you think you are doing?”
“I’m pretty sure I am getting shit faced drunk and just sang on that stage right there. And I know it was fucking awesome. What in the fuck do you think you are doing, Cross?”
I storm off headed back to the stairs and manage to dodge in between people without being mauled by someone. I turn around and see Dixon and the girls all behind me just as Cross grabs my arm and turns me around.
“I’m not playing games with you. Why in the hell did you just get on that stage? You know you aren’t supposed to be singing. Are you trying to completely ruin everything you have worked so hard for?”
“I know I’m not supposed to be singing but you know what, I’ve had a pretty shitty day.”
I all but run upstairs back to where our friends are and head straight for the bar.
“You are cut off Ashleigh. Do not give her anything else.”
“Um, I’m pretty sure I can speak for myself and yes, she will be giving me another drink. You have no control over me so I’m going to keep drinking. Or wait, let me guess. Do you own this place too so you think you have a right to cut me off? I mean, you seem to have your hand in every other business that’s part of my life.”
All eyes go between Cross and myself like a tennis match. Dixon hangs his head in his heads because he knows I’m about to tell him I know everything.
“What in the hell are you talking about Ashleigh? No, I don’t own this club. What would make you think that? And what are you talking about me having my hand in all of your life?”
At this point, the room has gotten still and quiet even though downstairs is still rocking. I feel all eyes on me because about half of the room knows what is going on.
“Well, let’s see Mr. Harper. It’s not every day you find out that the guy you’re seeing owns the café that you go to all the time yet never mentioned. I mean, that’s not so bad but then there’s the fact that he also decided to buy the recording studio I use right out from under the owner even though he wasn’t looking to sell. But the icing on the goddamn cake is when you find out that they guy you are fucking is the very person who has ruined your life. And if you want to add some sprinkles to the top of this fucked-up cupcake, he’s the person who went to your record label and ratted you and your health out to the owners and basically decided for you and for them that you needed a break. A very long break from the only career you have ever known.”
The look on his face says it all. He had every hope I would never find out I am sure. I storm over to the bar and the bartender already has a beer waiting but I ask her for another shot because let’s face it, I need it. When I turn around, he is right behind trying to give me a hug.
“Get your fucking hands off of me Cross. You do not get to touch me ever again. Any chance and I do mean any chance you ever had with me is gone. Do not call me, do not come to my house and do not come to any dinners I am at with our friends. If you see me on the street, don’t speak to me. I cannot believe I loved you…”
I lose it. I completely and utterly lose it. I start crying uncontrollably and Cross reaches out to pull me in for a hug.
“NO! No! Do not touch me. I’m serious Cross.”
As I’m talking to him, I start pushing at him and hitting on his chest. He finally grabs my wrists and pulls me in to his chest. He holds me while I bawl my eyes out and then I realize it’s him comforting me and try to pull away.
“Please let me go! Please Cross! If you ever thought you loved me, you will let me go and leave me alone.”
Dixon walks over and pulls me away from Cross. He leads me over to Merritt who is waiting on me by the stairs with my purse. I am hysterically crying and Q is waiting to walk me out so everyone doesn’t see me. I stop and glance back one more time at Cross. Then I turn away and it feels like my heart is breaking in two.
CROSS
What have I fucking done? The best thing that has ever happened to me hates my fucking guts.
“I have to go after her. I have to explain things to her.”
My brother, Gaines, grabs a hold of me and turns me to face him.
“I’m pretty sure that is the worst idea ever Cross. Let her go man. What you need to do is let her go. Giver her space and give her time. The last thing she needs right now is you chasing after her.”
He gives me a hefty pat on the back and walks over to my sister-in-law. She gives me a sympathetic look and they head out to go home. I’m pretty sure I have ruined everyone’s night by now. Reed walks over, grabs a beer and takes a seat by me.
“Man, what in the hell just happened? I feel like I’m living under a rock because I’m trying to figure out how I did not know about this.”
“No one knew but the label Reed. The only reason Dixon knew is because he came to my office. He thought I had been acting strange and was concerned and I just spilled my guts to him. Ugh! I am so fucked!”
“Shit. Your mom is going to be so pissed. She loves Ashleigh. Dude, I hate to say it but you are fucked. Sorry man.”
I give him an eat shit look because I don’t need everyone reminding me what a dick I am right now. Dixon walks back over and takes the seat on the other side.
“Why don’t we get out of here? The last thing you need to do is sit around and mope. Let’s get you home.”
I don’t even put up a fight. I walk down the stairs to be greeted by a stern look from Thomas.
“Don’t even start Thomas. I’ve heard it all and I know I screwed up. No reminders please.”
Thomas drops the guys off and then takes me home. Of course, the first thing I see when I walk in is a note she left me before my trip. Walking to my room to take a shower, I glance on my night stand to see a framed picture of the two of us. I can’t stop staring at her in the picture. I will get her back if it is the last thing I do. She can’t stay mad at me forever, right?
Chapter Twenty-Nine
ASHLEIGH
May 21st has arrived and so has Dixon and Ava’s wedding day. After the party at the club the other night, I wanted to pack up and go home to Alabama but I knew I had a week of events for the wedding.
I haven’t seen Cross at all. He’s stayed away since last weekend and he better continue to stay away. Unfortunately, we will see each other today since we are both in the the wedding party. I assumed I would see him last night at the rehearsal but as usual, he was on a plane coming home from a quick business trip.
The wedding is at 6:00 p.m. so the girls and I have spent the morning getting our nails and hair done before we head to the Atlanta History Center where the wedding will be held.
We are all sitting in the bridal room having a glass of champagne together before we get dressed. Our hair and make-up is all finished and we have one hour before pictures begin. We begin the process of helping Ava into her wedding gown.
“Ava, you look absolutely stunning. You are a beautiful bride. Dixon is going to flip out when he sees you.”
The finishing touches are done to her gown and her veil is put in place. She is perfection. We all get our bridesmaids dresses on as well. I have to admit, we look pretty amazing. There’s a knock on the door and Elizabeth and Victoria come into the room.
Elizabeth immediately comes over and gives me a hug and pulls me to the side for a moment. I know at this moment she knows what Cross did.
“Honey, I am so sorry. My son is quite the asshole, isn’t he? He could have gone about it a different way than he did. He loves you though. I hope you know that.”
“Thank you Elizabeth. I really don’t know what to say. He hurt me and broke my heart. I fell for him and he crushed me. I’m honestly not sure what I’m going to do when I see him tonight.”
Another knock on the door signals it is time for pictures. Ava goes to do the first reveal with Dixon and the bridal party heads to the patio to wait for the group shots.
We’re all waiting and talking to each other when the hairs on my neck stand on end. Merritt looks over at me and her expression changes as well.
“Merritt, Cross is out here now, isn’t he?”
“Yeah, sweetie. He just walked outside with Mason and Reed. You gonna be okay?”
Before I can turn around to see where he is, I feel his presence directly behind me. I turn my head to the side to catch him out of the corner of my eye and thankfully Ava calls out my name for our group picture of the bridesmaids.
CROSS
She looks beautiful. All I can do is stare at her because she is gorgeous. The girls are all wearing different dresses in shades of teal green. Ashleigh has on a strapless dress that hits at her knee. Her long hair is curly with her sides pulled back. Stunning is all I can say.
It crushes me that she doesn’t even acknowledge me but I know I deserve it. I watch the bridesmaids get their group and individual pictures made and when Ava and Dixon finally get outside, pictures continue with them for what seems like days. I glance over to see the five girls getting their picture together and they are all beautiful but Ashleigh stands out.
Pictures are complete and the girls go back to the bridal room to freshen up just as Merritt who is not only a bridesmaid and the sister of the groom, but also the wedding planner go into bossy mode.
“I need all the groomsmen and ushers in place at the entrance. Guests are starting to arrive and they need to be seated. Remember, it doesn’t matter which side they sit on. There is no bride or groom side today.”
All the guests arrive and the ceremony begins. The guys all take their places by the minister. The bridesmaids begin their walk down the aisle followed by the flower girls. Ava looks beautiful as she walks down the aisle but all my attention is directed to Ashleigh.
The ceremony goes perfect and we all head to the reception area. I can’t even get near Ashleigh without somebody blocking me off. Everyone is watching out for her tonight so I am basically shit out of luck.
Dixon is always the one I talk to about stuff like this but it’s his big day and I doubt he or Ava would be very happy with me manipulating his time at their wedding reception. I’m standing up at the bar getting a beer when my brother walks up.
“What’s up little brother? You look like you could use a friend right now.”
“Shit Gaines. Everything sucks tonight man. All I want to do is talk to Ashleigh but she has every person watching out for her tonight and no one will let me near her. I really need her to hear me out.”
“Look Cross. It’s only been a week since the shit hit the fans. This isn’t something little like you forgot an anniversary or you hurt her feelings. Man, you messed with her career. And before you put up a fight with me, I know why you did it and I agree, she needed a break. Unfortunately, I think you went about it in a shitty way.”
“How could I fuck this up Gaines? The first woman to ever make me feel this way. I just go and fuck it up. I thought we had a future together. Dude, I actually saw us married and having kids together one day. Now, she acts like I’m dead to her. I’ve lost her forever.”
I glance up to look at Gaines and see my dad has joined us. From the look on his face, he overheard what I just said.
“Son, can I interrupt you for a moment?”
I look at him and just nod my head.
“You haven’t lost her. I know you think you have with the way she’s acting right now but you need to give her time and give her space. It’s pretty evident you both love each other and that’s not something that can be broken. Cross, you’ve changed since you met her but unfortunately, you still have that alpha personality and you like to be in charge. Unfortunately, her career is not something you get to be in charge of. That is her life.”
“I know dad but I honestly wasn’t trying to be all alpha on her. I thought I was doing the right thing but we all know that it wasn’t now. What the fuck am I supposed to do?”
“Win her back. Do whatever you have to do and get her back. She loves you and I know you love her. Do what it takes to get her back but don’t screw it up this time. Okay?”
My dad doesn’t wait for a response. He just grabs his drink and walks back to my mom and their friends.
I spend the next hour mingling and talking with friends while I try to stay distracted from Ashleigh. All was going well until I heard that sweet voice coming from the stage.
Chapter Thirty
ASHLEIGH
“Hey everyone! I want to first ask you to join me in a round of applause of our beautiful couple, Ava & Dixon!”
Everyone claps or whistles and yells out which makes me smile. I’m getting nervous though because what I’m about to do next is going to make a few people mad.
“Now, to celebrate this amazing couple who means the absolute world to me, I promised them months ago that I would sing at their wedding. I was not about to back out of a promise.”
I start to sing as they dance their first dance as husband and wife. They asked me the minute after they got engaged and I would never say no. I did some groveling last week and got permission from my label as well as Dr. Whitley to sing two songs at their wedding but that was my limit. We decided I would sing the songs for their first dance as well as the father-daughter dance.
After both songs are done, I step off the stage to find Merritt waiting on me with a bottle of water. I hear her mutter ‘oh shit’ which makes me look up to a very pissed off Cross headed my way. Merritt immediately cuts him off before he can make a scene in the reception area. She drags him outside to the balcony as I follow along with all our friends.
“Cross Hamilton, don’t you dare even think about making a scene at this wedding. If you have an issue with something, the least you can do is act civil about it and not cause a scene. Do you understand?!”
“Look Merritt. I wasn’t going to make a scene. I just needed to talk to…”
“The hell you do, Cross. There is nothing that needs to be said between us. I know what you were coming over to say to me and let me remind you, it’s none of your goddamn business. I think you’ve done enough with this situation already, don’t you?”
