Dreams of Hell (The Protector Guild Book 3), page 10
“If you manage to kill the creature, however,” Atlas said, his eyes flashing to me, brow arching in clear challenge, “you and your partner will get to choose the team you join at the end of the year. This is the only time you will be given direct power to choose your future path. You’ll be given one weapon, so select wisely and pair up. There are different strengths and weaknesses between vampires and werewolves. You’ve studied them thoroughly, now choose your fate.”
Ominous. If anyone else uttered that phrase, it would sound like a cheesy line from a video game; but Atlas’s delivery just drilled in the importance of our decision.
I rolled my neck, trying to distract myself from my traitorous body. I was trained to kill vampires and werewolves. So why did the idea of killing Darius fill me with a prickly dread?
He was evil. I knew that. Except...well, maybe he wasn’t? I wasn’t entirely sure, not the way that I had been before meeting him. The dude was a clusterfuck of confusion and every time I encountered him, I was left annoyed and wanting to break something. That had to mean evil. Evil. Yeah, I was going with that. I forced my brain to focus on the fact that he killed a protector right in front of me—drained him dry like his life meant nothing. And if he hadn’t been recaptured by Six, there’d probably be a trail of bodies following him by now.
I would focus on that. I would not let myself think about how he helped me save Ralph’s life. That was just a mutually beneficial trade for both of us.
Jer squeezed my hand, harder than he probably meant to. “Go with the wolf, Max. That vamp—he’s stronger than he looks and he’s been in captivity so long that he’s not totally there, if you get what I mean.” Without another word, he walked away, heading for the doors.
I watched as he left the gym, suppressing my desire to go with him. I didn’t want to do this. Between Darius and Atlas, my feelings about monsters were impossible to dissect.
But Jer? What was his deal here? Protectors loved this shit, so why wasn’t he staying to watch the big show? Glancing around at the crowd, it seemed like the room was practically vibrating with anticipation. Jer’s expression had been filled with a solemn dread.
“You’re my partner,” Ro said, walking towards me looking all stern and bossy in that way only older brothers knew how to pull off. There was no ask in his tone, and I found myself scanning the room for Izzy. “Izzy is going to partner with someone else, I already told her I’m with you.”
I nodded, too nervous about the exercise to fight Ro on this. Ever since the first vamp attack a few months ago, he’d been extremely protective. But after that night in the woods? His brotherly instincts had become downright suffocating.
I couldn’t blame him though, not really. If the situation had been reversed, and he’d been the one experiencing one too many close calls with death, I’d be attached to him like a leech too.
“And I want us to take on the wolf,” he said, running a hand through his light blond hair. For someone who was a bossy badass, he looked a lot like the typical guy-next-door trope. The soft edges mixed with hard always gave me pause—there was so much going on in his head. Not for the first time, I wished for the ability to peek inside, to smooth the bubbles of concern that would show up in a forehead crease here, a heavy sigh there.
“We go for the vampire,” I said, turning away from him to select my weapons. I was short at five-foot-four, so I never bothered with the swords. They were too bulky and cumbersome. And as much as I admired the people who used them, all dance and grace and precision, I knew they would never suit me.
I was one hundred percent all about the daggers. Grabbing two, I strapped them into a thigh holster and walked back towards the main ring, writing our names underneath the list of recruits signing up for the vampire.
I breathed out a sigh of relief, when I saw that most people opted to go for the werewolf. I wasn’t sure if it was because she was smaller and female, or the fact that Darius had a bit of a feral gleam in his eyes, like he was actually looking forward to fighting us all.
Whatever it was, I scolded myself for being pleased that she would have to fight off more protectors than Darius. It looked like he mostly had the bigger guys and the ones who felt they had something to prove. I was unsurprised to find Reza on his list—she wanted free reign to pick Team Six, so I knew she’d be going for a kill shot. And with the dynamic between her and Alleva, I knew that she wanted to make a splash, prove her value in a big way. Killing a vampire was her ticket in.
I watched as the first two boys took on Darius. One of them was Theo, Izzy’s older brother who she barely tolerated, and the other was a guy I hadn’t officially met yet.
My head started to get fuzzy until I realized I was holding my breath. I unclenched my fists, and glanced at Atlas, unsurprised to see him studying me as he leaned casually against the wall, like this was nothing but a lazy, typical afternoon and not a blood-hungry battle.
Theo opted for a sword, which meant he was aiming to decapitate. Generally speaking, swords were too bulky for protectors to do fieldwork with, so this was pure hubris on his part. His partner had a set of daggers, like me, and his footwork was a lot more impressive. I made a mental note to tap him for a sparring match later on.
They danced around Darius, so that one of them was on either side of him at all times. Darius watched, his eyes shining with amusement, like a lion waiting to spring on a couple of mice. In a flash, too fast for any of Six to prevent, he moved briefly to the side, grabbing Theo and wrapping his hands around either side of his neck.
“No!” I screamed, unable to keep it in. Theo was a douche, no doubt about it, but he was Izzy’s brother and if he died, she’d be devastated.
Shockingly, Darius stilled, shoving Theo away instead of snapping his neck. I let go of my breath, relief trickling through my body.
Atlas and Declan glanced at each other, communicating in silence, their faces expressionless.
Atlas took a step forward, and looked down with disgust at Theo. “One minute, you’re done. The vamp could have broken your neck.”
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” Theo yelled, face burning red with anger and shame. “I had him, I was just spreading out the fun.”
“You’re done,” Eli said, nodding his head for Theo to get off the mat, the threat in his eyes clear as day. “Greg, if you want you can find another partner and go again later today. I recommend choosing based on competence, not friendship.”
Theo stormed out, slamming the door closed as he disappeared.
“He’s going to be insufferable to be around now,” Izzy said, sliding up next to us. “Serves him right for being so cocky though. Maybe another few months of training will knock some humility into him.” She caught my questioning stare and shook her head. “They say that you have to go through another year before joining a team formally, but they almost never make you do more than six months. Especially now, with the rush order on all of us as it is. They don’t have the womanpower to wait that long for us to get out into the field. I’m taking on the werewolf with Will.”
I’d met Will a few times, and he seemed nice enough. A bit shy, but he kept to himself and got his work done, which was a win in my book. He was also stacked with muscle, and surprisingly quick on his feet, so I knew he’d be a good partner for Izzy.
“Just between us girls,” Izzy said, winking at me and Ro, “I think he has a bit of a crush.” She shrugged, a grin creeping up her face. “Which speaks to his impeccable taste, of course.”
“Max, Rowan, you’re next,” Eli called, avoiding eye contact as he gestured for us to come forward.
“Good luck,” Izzy said, her hand closing around my wrist until she had my full attention. “Don’t let your guard down, no matter what. There’s something off about that one.”
“Let’s just make this quick. I’m going to go for a decapitation and hopefully we’ll be done within the minute. Then, we can angle ourselves for joining Ten officially,” Ro said, whispering in my ear.
My body broke out in chills as we walked across the platform. I met Darius’s teasing eyes and swallowed thickly as we took our starting positions.
“Always a delight to see you again, little protector.”
Chapter Ten
Max
I pulled a dagger from my holster, my fingers suddenly feeling like rubber as I stared Darius down. He was easily a foot taller than me and looked a little worse for wear since the last time I’d seen him. My stomach dipped as I considered what they must be doing to him down there. The research unit ran a ridiculous number of tests on Ralph when he was locked up. And I imagined they were doubling down on Darius now that he’d escaped once already. It was probably a twisted form of punishment.
Ro looked in my direction, taking in my stiff posture, and the sweat breaking out on my forehead. The concern on his face was palpable, and he was probably afraid I was freezing up again. And, I was, just not for the reasons that he probably thought that I was.
I’d always meant to fill Ro and Izzy in on what happened that night with Darius, but every time I tried, the words dried up and died on my tongue. I didn’t know how to explain to them why I trusted Darius in the first place, because I still didn’t understand it myself.
Before Ro could initiate his attack, I went running towards Darius, swiping the edge of my blade against his cheek. A slim line of blood emerged, and I felt sick to my stomach that I was the cause. And even more disgusted because I knew that I wasn’t supposed to feel guilt for this; that killing vampires would be part of my daily job soon enough.
Darius grinned, recentering his focus on me, not concerned at all by the small slice. If anything, he seemed excited by it. He licked his lip and stalked closer.
I wasn’t afraid of him though, which scared me more than anything else. He was a vampire, a stone-cold killer. It was my job, my whole purpose, to hate him.
So why didn’t I?
My feet dug into the soft mat as Darius pounced. Suddenly, in a single blink, he was pinning me down to the ground beneath him. I squirmed as his unusual eyes came to meet my own. He was so close, and I was suddenly aware of all of the points of our bodies that were touching. A blush heated my skin as Darius chuckled, his breath blowing against the shell of my ear. My entire body shivered at the sensation, and I forced myself to concentrate on the task at hand.
My body wasn’t supposed to react like this when a monster had me in such a vulnerable position. I should be afraid, should be using my adrenaline to get out of this very precarious position and turn the fight to my favor.
In my peripheral, I saw Ro lifting his axe, trying to assess how he could strike at Darius without hurting me. At the same time, I saw Eli, Declan, and Atlas all tensed and ready to interfere.
It was now or never. I released the daggers in my hand, dropping them at my side. Then I stared deeply into Darius’s eyes. “Please,” I whispered, so quietly almost no sound left my lips, “you have to work with me.”
Curiosity flashed in his eyes and I used the moment to twist my hips, flipping us over so that I was on top now. The maneuver would never have worked if Darius hadn’t allowed it to, hadn’t helped it along.
He was trusting me. Positioning both of my hands on either side of his head, I used all of my strength to snap his spine, watching as the whisper of a grin left Darius’s face, until all that was left was an alarmingly blank stare—different only in color from the blank stare that haunted me in so many of my nightmares.
Cheers broke out through the room, and I heard Izzy chanting about how her best friend was a badass as I climbed off Darius, doing my best to swallow any concern that might have leaked through my walls.
I could feel Ro’s questioning look eating through my skin, but I avoided looking back at him. The smart thing would be to decapitate Darius now, while he’s down for the count unable to react. But I couldn’t do it, and I couldn’t let Ro do it either. I just had to hope that no one else would take the opportunity.
Ro was the one person I couldn’t lie to, and I didn’t think he was ready to hear the truth.
Hell, I wasn’t ready to hear the truth, wasn’t ready to admit that I wasn’t okay with Darius dying. Losing Wade had changed everything, and I wasn’t ready to lose anyone else, even if it included a snarky, infuriating vampire. And I was far too uncomfortable with that realization to examine it any further, let alone speak it out loud.
“She didn’t kill him though,” Reza said, her arms crossed over her chest as she curled her lip. “So it’s not a true win.”
She was right. Vampires couldn’t be killed by a broken neck. Darius would be knocked unconscious for a few hours, but he’d survive, waking up in his reinforced cell with a gnarly headache, nothing more. But it was better than if Ro got a solid hit on him. I couldn’t risk the chance of Ro killing him.
And I also wasn’t willing to trust Ro’s life in Darius’s hands. I didn’t think Darius would kill me—probably not, anyway—but I wasn’t so sure about how he’d handle Ro if he came swinging in with his axe.
“A big part of our job is bringing monsters back to Headquarters,” I said, desperately trying to quell the shake in my voice as I turned towards Reza. “Alive. A lot of times, that’s the more difficult thing to accomplish.”
My fists clenched as I desperately hoped that the room would buy that line. It was the one chance I had; the one chance Darius had.
“It’s a pass,” Atlas said, stepping up and nudging Darius with his foot. “Not a win. The rest of you will take on the wolf. The vampire is going to be incapacitated for the rest of the session today.” He turned in my direction, coldly examining me as I looked away from Darius’s lifeless body.
I let out the breath I didn’t realize I was holding, squirming under Atlas’s scrutiny. Without another word, I left the mat, walking over to Izzy. I limply let her hug me congratulations and listened halfheartedly to her play-by-play descriptions as everyone fought the female wolf.
Ro walked over and stood behind me. I could feel all of his silent questions lapping at the back of my neck, but I focused all of my attention on ignoring him. Instead, I cheered lazily when Izzy cheered, booed when she booed, and otherwise stood in silence, my thoughts swimming through my head as the room spun around me.
What the hell was I doing? And why was I so fucking confused all of the time? It was one thing to protect Atlas. He was a protector, at least partially anyway. He’d been raised with our morals, at any rate. So I could vaguely convince myself that even though he occasionally turned into a werewolf, he wasn’t a completely awful dude.
But Darius? He was one hundred percent vampire. And more than that, I witnessed him murder a protector. The only reason he even helped me rescue Ralph in the first place was because I unlocked his cell and helped him escape right along with my hellhound. It was a temporary, risky, thoughtless alliance. An alliance that was supposed to be broken as soon as the terms were met.
And now what? Would Atlas, Eli, and Declan know that I snapped his neck as a way to save him from Ro? Did Ro know? My breathing started to feel erratic, like my lungs couldn’t fill enough or couldn’t fill quickly enough. What would Cyrus say? I was already in some serious shit with Seamus and Cyrus because of the breakout to begin with. And now I was throwing spars and fucking up real missions.
Izzy’s hand gripped my wrist, jarring me back to the moment. I was silently thankful for her fingernails as they dug into my skin, it helped ground me, give me something other than my thoughts to focus on. I breathed in slowly, the scent of plastic mats and sweaty bodies filling my nostrils. I heard...nothing.
And then the room broke out in a loud wave of cheers.
“Shit,” Izzy said next to me, her head shaking back and forth. “She’s going to be insufferable after this. More insufferable anyway.”
Confused, I glanced up at the mats. Reza was standing triumphantly, her smooth skin sticky with sweat as she swept stray pieces of hair against her scalp. Her perfectly white teeth were stretched into a wide smile filled with pride. My eyes traveled lower, until I saw the reason for all of the excitement.
In her left hand, Reza was gripping the werewolf girl’s head by the hair, her fingers entangled in the red locks. The body lay forgotten several feet away.
She won.
Reza’s bright blue eyes scoured the crowd until they landed on Atlas. If possible, her smile grew even bigger. We all knew which team she would be claiming as her reward.
***
“I’m sorry, Max,” Izzy said as she sifted through her pile of workout clothes. She held up a pair of back leggings, examining them for holes, before she tossed them into her bag. “Seriously, it’s absolute shit, and if I could sneak you in with me, I would.”
“Don’t even think about it,” Ro said, his tone drier than usual. He walked into Izzy’s bedroom without either of us knowing. Turbulent blue eyes met mine and I broke contact first. “She shouldn’t be going. Cyrus is right, a few more weeks will be good for her before she gets back out on the field. That last mission was too much, too soon. You’ll be back out there in no time, just not yet.”
I clenched my jaw so tightly that I half expected to crack a tooth. Izzy and Ro were getting ready to leave for another mission with Ten. They’d be gone for a few days.
But I wasn’t going with them. I was more or less on protector timeout, all thanks to Ro.
“What did you say to him?” I stood up, my fists balled at my sides. It wasn’t often that Ro and I didn’t see eye-to-eye on something. And more than staying behind, it killed me that he’d gone behind my back. That he was the reason I would be left alone in this cabin for who knew how long.
Was this just about the mission? Or was this about how I handled the fight with Darius?
Ro let out a frustrated sigh before settling some of his weight on Izzy’s desk. “The truth, Max. You almost got yourself killed during the last mission. I don’t know where you were, but you weren’t there with us. And then the other day? With that vampire? You went off book and jumped him without even working with me.” He ran a hand through his blond hair, mussing it up in multiple directions. I watched as it all fell back down, perfectly in place. “I couldn’t find an in—couldn’t swipe at the vamp without risking your neck too.”
