Mr Darcy's Fight for Love, page 2
“Do you think I am ugly?” he asked, touching his scars.
Mary did not look at him, she remembered his face and his allure while she shook her head.
“Can you please talk?” he asked less sure of himself. Finally, she gazed up to find his eyes fixed with intensity on her and again fear enveloped her. What if ‘they’ were right and he was mad? However, his face was more sad than scary, and the scars did not matter to her.
“No,” she whispered, “I find you…”
“How?” he cried impatiently.
“Beautiful,” she said and blushed. It was not the best description for a boy and then she realised they were not a boy and a girl but grown-ups and she blushed again. Mary Bennet had never thought in those terms about her. This boy…the duke, made her feel like a young woman.
His sad eyes laughed again.
“You are beautiful…Mary Bennet, I am an ugly boy full of old scars which scare people.”
He did not feel he was a boy any longer…in the morning he woke up like always, the same as the last seven years but in front of this young girl he became a man of almost 21. From that horrible night—seven years ago—he had refused to grow up although his body did not listen to him. He became a man, although he wondered if she saw him as a boy or a man. For him the change was so sudden that he could hardly believe it.
He was not mad at her. In a strange way it even could be said he had waited for her. Not precisely that young lady named Mary Bennet, but a chance to change.
For some time now, he had decided to end his seclusion, although he did not know how or what to do. Sometimes he even ventured out into the park to watch the men working. Once or twice, he even approached and talked to a man who seemed his age. However, the people around were afraid to speak to him…and he wondered if it was because he was ugly or because Sophie has forbidden all of them to approach him.
In the beginning, after the accident, he cried and shouted like a mad man whenever a stranger approached him. For a long time, he had allowed only his father’s butler and the maids to attend him. He ate with Sophie or went to the library, and those were the only places he visited, then he began to enjoy staying in her parlour. It took him almost four years to walk around the house but only around the places untouched by the fire.
“Sorry,” he said, “I was thinking about this strange story…” Mary looked confused, even scared, so he added in haste, “You—appearing in my garden…”
“I am sorry,” she hastily said, “I knew it was forbidden to come near your apartment, but I did not realise I entered your garden.”
Thomas made her stop with a firm gesture, “Don’t speak nonsense; it is an enjoyable event in my life.”
They conversed for a whole hour. About books at first but then only about her life—where she lived and how her days were spent…
“I hide most of the time from my mother and sisters; they have such different interests from mine.”
And it was his turn to be confused; he could not imagine what ‘interests’ other people might have.
“They talk only about dresses and marriages and they…gossip a lot.”
“Everybody? Even men?”
“Well, I know almost only women, my mother and four sisters and their friends. The only men I know are my father and my uncle…and some neighbours.”
“But you go to the parties?”
“Only when my mother forces me…”
“I see,” he said. “In a way, you live as secluded as I do, only I am here in my home hiding from everybody.”
“Oh,” Mary sighed, “I would like so much to have a place like this and an aunt to guard me against other people.”
“Yes, in the beginning, it was the only way I could face life, but lately… You see Mary, now I want to change…I do not suffer any more like I used to and I want to see people. This is why I have allowed Sophie to reconstruct and decorate the house and the parks. I am curious to know about life outside the walls of my home.”
"But if you are so curious, why do you still hide here?" asked Mary after some time. Looking into her eyes, he did not remember anymore how he came to be the mad boy, prisoner of his past and memories.
He rang for the maid to bring the tea and as she entered the room, they both looked at how she stopped in shock and dropped the tray out of her hands, making a terrible noise. Only seconds later Sophie arrived, terrified. She was continuously afraid he would do something terrible and kill himself. It was her constant fear that she would not be capable of taking care of him. She imagined the tragedy so many times that it was like a sort of reality.
But the scene she found was so far from her nightmares—sitting in front of the Duke of Sommershire, at the table, was that strange girl who disappeared with a book, some hours ago. Sophie, for once, was stymied, she did not know what to do or say. They seemed to be good together but she did not dare to hope that a miracle had taken place and he was enjoying being with someone…a young woman.
Mary got up in a hurry, blushing, “I am sorry, madam!” she cried, ready to run away. To Lady Sommershire’s total amazement, Thomas took the girl’s hand and obliged her to sit, “Be calm, Mary, nobody is scolding you!”
“No! Of course not!” Lady Sommershire exclaimed and she clapped her hands to hurry the maids who were cleaning the mess, “Faster, my girls, bring Miss Bennet and His Grace more tea.” She prepared to leave and let Thomas enjoy the tea and the company, but his voice stopped her.
“Sophie,” he said, “please invite Mr Gardiner and the other ladies to dinner.”
If an angel from the sky had arrived on a cloud in their home, Lady Sommershire would have been less surprised. But she managed to remain calm; she nodded with a pale smile and shut the door, leaving them alone. Once in her parlour she let her tears flow and her tremendous emotion burst in front of a terrified Elizabeth. When the incident happened they were alone, chatting, while Jane walked around the art galleries with Mr Gardiner.
Lady Sommershire sat down on the couch and took Elizabeth’s hand, making her also sit.
“It is a miracle!” she whispered. “A miracle!”
Elizabeth did not understand what was happening, yet it was not a tragedy, Lady Sommershire looked stunned but not desperate.
“Your sister, I do not remember her name, the one who left with a book…”
“Mary,” Elizabeth answered, more and more worried. She could not imagine a circumstance—happy or unhappy—to have Mary as the principal character. She was a shy girl who, most of the time, looked out of place…in so many ways, Mary was still a young girl unaware of the world around her.
“Mary was with my nephew…talking!”
Elizabeth looked at Lady Sommershire, wholly confused. She suspected it was not a bad thing that they were together, but she could not understand how the shy and timid Mary arrived in the duke's room…or what the repercussions would be.
“I am sorry, Lady Sommershire, I thought she understood not to approach His Grace’s apartment,” Elizabeth said, not knowing for sure how to react to the news.
“No, no my dear,” Lady Sommershire answered. It is a miracle, we need to make it last. It is the first stranger he has allowed near him since…well since the accident.”
They stood in silence for some time; Lady Sommershire too shocked to speak, Elizabeth wondering again how her sister found herself in the duke’s apartment. She was not worried about her reputation; she just wondered how such an event could take place.
“She probably went to his garden, and he saw her. My dear, this is not all; he wants me to ask you to stay for dinner…”
Lady Sommershire did not know what he meant by dinner, was he going to dine with them, or did he want to be alone with Mary? In any circumstance, she was ready to do whatever it took to make sure that dinner would go on exactly as he wanted.
She took Elizabeth’s hands in her own saying, “My dear, help me, please help me! It is the first time in seven years he is interested in real life, I had lost all hope. We all did—all the people who love him.”
“I will do whatever it takes, madam, to help him,” Elizabeth agreed, feeling that she wanted to help that sad woman and her unhappy nephew.
“Call me Sophie…let us not be formal anymore. I need a huge effort from your part, and I do not know if Mr Gardiner will accept…they…well, Thomas…if he wants to dine alone with her…your sister.”
Elizabeth began to understand. “My uncle knows well your ordeal, and I am sure he would not be against them dining alone.”
“Of course, we will also have dinner. I am thrilled to have someone like you and your sister Jane at Sommershire.”
∞∞∞
Mr Gardiner listened in disbelief to Lady Sommershire’s story. She was not completely coherent and clearly on the verge of tremendous emotion.
"Our Mary?" he asked for a second time making her ladyship smile. "Yes, your Mary, has an amazing influence on my nephew.”
Like Elizabeth—only minutes ago—he was asking himself how it was possible for the shy girl he always thought to be a little simple, to meet that boy who seemingly never grew up to be a man.
“Of course, my Lady,” he said, “we will do whatever it is necessary to please His Grace! We gladly agree to stay for dinner.”
“But…you understand Mr Gardiner that they may have dinner in his dining room while we will have ours in the grand one.”
“Yes, of course, Lady Sommershire, I repeat we will gladly do what it is best for His Grace.”
Elizabeth looked at Jane and then at her uncle. If a man ever asked one of them to dine alone, their uncle would have said no. But Mary…they considered her to be just a girl in a grown-up body. Nothing could happen between them, and no harm could be done to her reputation.
Still, Mr Gardiner imagined how he would tell the whole story to Margaret and his sister, hoping they would approve his decision. Meanwhile, having dinner at Sommershire Palace was a rare honour he could use in the future for his business. Or, who knows, even his nieces could benefit from it.
Just a few hours after their arrival Elizabeth and Jane were no more accompanying their uncle but guests. They received an apartment to rest for a half an hour and refresh for dinner.
The sisters could hardly contain their delight.
“It is wonderful yet strange,” Jane said, “I still cannot believe it is true. And all this because of Mary. I hope she behaves like a young lady.”
“Well, I suppose neither is the duke aware of how to behave in the society which is probably why they liked each other.”
The sisters laughed with benevolence. They tried so many times to make Mary accept she was a young girl and not a child anymore, but she always escaped into her own world, ignoring their advice.
“I hope she remembers at least a part of our words or advice,” Jane said while looking around the large bedroom, wondering how it was to live in such a place. “The palace is breathtaking; I am so proud of our uncle and all the work he has done!”
Elizabeth looked out the window toward the park imagining she was at Pemberley, the mistress of the house.
Chapter 3
“Are we going to eat alone?” Mary asked, looking at the table where there where only two plates, both at the same end.
“Are you disappointed?” asked the young duke while he led her to her place.
“No. I do not know how you arrived at this result.” She was stunned but happy; a strange combination never experienced before. It seemed all her life, until Thomas, she had been in a kind of unpleasant fog that continuously made her uncomfortable and unworldly. At home she feared her mother, she despised Lydia and ran away from Kitty. Only Elizabeth and Jane had always been kind to her and tried to understand her moods and her wishes. She rarely could understand the world or feel comfortable near her family.
“I have many people around me, some even benevolent, yet I always had this impression that I could not communicate with them,” she said. She felt better telling him what was in her heart.
“It is strange because it is how I felt the last seven years…but my life…before…was not like this. I remember how close I was to Mama, how we laughed…” he said and stopped as tears fell on his face, but he was not ashamed or embarrassed. It was like Mary had always been in his life and she knew all his sorrows and secrets.
“I am sorry, Thomas!” she said, her beautiful face reflecting deep sadness. “I do not know what I can tell you; I do not want to see you suffer.”
The maids came in with the dinner, silently waiting for a sign that they could begin serving. But the duke was so grieved he seemed not to observe them. Mary, who had not given an order all her life, looked around hoping someone else would come but finally said, “Please, begin to serve.”
It became evident that the young lady had his agreement, so the maids bowed, served the soup and left.
Thomas’ look was full of gratitude, “Thank you!” he whispered.
Then he took her hand visibly feeling better. "You can speak whatever you want. I am also astonished by my behaviour; it is not manly to cry…that is what papa always told my brother and me…I had a brother, and his name was Arnold, yes, and a sister, Annabella. You know what happened to them."
“Yes, I know, but when you wish to remember them, I will be here.”
“Do you promise?” he asked
“Yes, I do not know what it will take to spend my time with you, but you can use your influence to make them understand it is so important for us to see each other…”
“You do not need to worry; the only accord I need is from you.”
They spent the perfect evening, hardly eating. It was fun to be together and chat for long minutes, over and over again, about how they had met. It seemed a miracle how good they were together—so powerful was the bond between them.
Late in the evening, when finally Mary had to leave, for the first time in years, he came to meet their guests. He imagined Mary’s sisters were glancing at him with much curiosity, but it was only half true. They looked the same toward Mary as neither of her sisters nor Mr Gardiner had ever seen her in a similar situation. They kept looking at her as she fell asleep the very moment the carriage left the park, discovering on her face a smile they did not know.
The Duke of Sommershire followed the carriage until it disappeared. He was in the middle of new feelings he hardly recognised yet he said with a firm voice, “What do you say, Sophie, if we invite Mrs Bennet and her daughters to stay a week here with us?”
The smile flourishing on Sophie’s face was so beautiful that Thomas wondered how he could have been so selfish as to make her feel only despair and helplessness. For seven long years!
“I am sorry, Sophie!” he said, with tears on his face.
They did not need many words to understand each other. She stood up and took him into her arms like a mother, he was her child, and he was born again, "Do not talk nonsense, please do not have any regrets, you are the bravest man I have ever met!"
For a long time her arms had been his only refuge. During the first days or weeks or even months—Thomas remembered—he could not breathe if she were not near him.
“You saved me, Sophie, you obliged me to live even when I did not want to.”
“I did not see many results,” she said, but Thomas shook his head, “There were results, sometimes imperceptible, I was alive and, for a long time, it was enough.”
∞∞∞
Mr Gardiner and the girls were received with a sense of concern. Mrs Bennet looked attentively to all her daughters searching for a sign of illness or other misfortune, but everybody was apparently well.
“What happened?” Mrs Gardiner asked.
They had received a short message from Mr Gardiner saying they were invited to dinner and probably would be late. Never in the past, had Mr Gardiner been invited to dine in a house where he worked. She suspected, even if her husband never complained, that sometimes he was not treated fairly by his employers. To be invited to dine at Sommershire Palace was an incredible circumstance.
Upon their arrival, Mary went to bed while Jane and Elizabeth followed the others into the parlour where Mr Gardiner, a glass of brandy in his hand, began his unbelievable story.
“Lady Sommershire is a very human and warm person, but this would have never happened without Mary!”
He looked at his wife and sister to see the effect of his words and indeed, the astonishment was so great that Jane and Elizabeth began to laugh.
“You did not know, Mama, what you raised!” Elizabeth continued her uncle’s story, still laughing.
Mr Gardiner was eager to speak, it was his niece’s doing, but it was finally his victory. “While Mary was strolling through the huge park, she trespassed into His Grace’s garden. We do not know for sure what happened, but it seems that the secluded duke invited her to take tea and then they chatted. It was the first time in years he accepted a stranger and this stranger was our Mary.”
They were telling the story all at the same time.
“Lady Sommershire was so happy that she could hardly talk, she cried in my arms for minutes,” Elizabeth said.
"It was very emotional," Jane continued.
Mr Gardiner was smiling. The tiresome, exciting day and the brandy had their effect, he was incapable of keeping his eyes open although from his chair, he wanted to boast of his triumph.
“But how?” asked Mrs Bennet, who knew her daughter well. Sometimes she did not even speak to them a whole morning.
"Mama," Jane said, "Mary was astonishing. I do not know how it is possible, maybe it is our fault that we did not insist sooner to make her look her age; she is a young woman and we kept on treating her like a little girl."
Elizabeth was nodding, “We almost did not recognise her when she appeared after spending some time with the duke.”
Neither Mrs Bennet nor Mrs Gardiner asked details about Mary and the duke being alone in his apartment. In their eyes it was not a problem.
