Guarding my heart, I try to find anything in his words that indicates that he’s lying, or that he’s actually been with others besides me, but I can’t detect anything. He’s telling the truth.

  “I’m such a fucking idiot,” I cry, burying my face in my hands.

  Everett laughs deeply and pulls me into his arms again. “You’re not an idiot, Lanie. You’re just passionate. And I think that’s so sweet. But I promise you, you’re my girl. You’re the only one I want, okay?”

  It takes a moment, but I finally nod and look up into his eyes again. I know he doesn’t want me to say it, but I feel like such a stupid bitch. I overreacted hardcore, and now he and Sidney both probably think I’m a nutjob or something.

  After I’ve calmed down, Everett sits me on my bed and rubs my leg. “Are you feeling okay now?”

  “Yeah,” I say, nodding slowly. “Yeah, I’m okay. Gloria’s probably worried sick about me. We were making cookies when Sidney showed up. They were supposed to be a surprise for you.”

  “You should get back to that. I do love cookies after all.”

  “Okay,” I smile bashfully. Everett spends a few more minutes with me before he heads downstairs to have his meeting with Sidney. Now that I’m alone, I take a few deep breaths and head to the bathroom. My makeup isn’t ruined, thankfully, but my eyes are a little red. I take a drink from the water faucet, then straighten up.

  I’m okay. We’re okay.

  11

  Everett

  I can’t stop thinking about what Lane said to me last night. She was open and honest about her feelings, and she told me everything I ever wondered about us. This isn’t all in my head. I’m not projecting more onto her than she is onto me. Knowing that we’re on equal footing is both exciting and unnerving at the same time.

  Not very many women ever affect me in the same way Lane does. I can’t remember the last time I wanted to be better for someone else and not the other way around. But that’s the truth. I want to be a better man for Lane, and if that means showing her that I care about her and I’m not fooling around with other women, then I have to do something big and prove that to her.

  In my office a few days later, I get a call from Sidney.

  “Morning, handsome,” she says, and I can practically hear her smirk through the phone.

  “How are you?” I ask, distracted.

  “Wow, not even a ‘beautiful’ or ‘gorgeous’ attached to that?” she teases.

  I blink when I realize that I didn’t reciprocate. “Sorry, I’m just reading emails right now. I do want to talk about that, but we can put a pin in it. What’s up?”

  “Well, I wanted to know if Lane was willing to paint something for me. Does she do commission?”

  “Not usually,” I say. “But I’ve also never asked her to.”

  “Well, do me a favor and see if she’s interested. While she was giving me the tour of the house, I saw some of her artwork, and it was beautiful. I’d love to hire her to paint something for me, and I’m willing to pay her twice as much. You know, as a way to make up for what I said.”

  I smirk. “What did you say?”

  “I might’ve been suggestive about my relationship with you,” Sidney laughs. “I didn’t know you two were seeing each other, or I never would’ve mentioned it in the first place. My apologies.”

  I hand wave the apology. “Please, no need. I’m trying to smooth things out with her right now, actually.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “That’s what I wanted to talk about. You know I adore your company more than anything, right? But I feel like our relationship makes Lane uncomfortable. All the flirting, playful banter.”

  “Wow,” Sidney says. She pauses for a moment, then laughs. For a second, I worry that I’ve upset her, but then she says, “I can’t believe Everett Grisham, serial playboy, is settling down.”

  “I’m not settling down,” I say, almost defensively.

  “You can’t fool me. You’re worried you’re going to lose your girlfriend if you don’t stop flirting with other women, and you’re right. A pretty little thing like that won’t be at a loss for men, and you’d be a royal fucking idiot to blow it with her. So, no, I don’t mind calming things down. I completely understand.”

  I let out a sigh of relief. She’s essentially said everything I felt so that I don’t have to. This is exactly why we’re such good friends. She understand me. “Glad to hear it.”

  “What else are you going to do?”

  “Hm?”

  “About making sure Lane knows you’re seriously committed to her.” Sidney never hides her true feelings, and now she sounds like she’s talking to a child that’s slow on the upswing.

  “Oh, I wasn’t…”

  “Everett, please tell me you aren’t going to say you weren’t planning on doing anything else besides talking to me?”

  I laugh with embarrassment. “Maybe.”

  “God,” Sidney sighs. “Okay, here’s what you’re going to do. You’re going to do some big huge gesture to show her that you only care about her. You make her the center of attention. You treat her and prove that you only have eyes for her. Do you think you can do that?”

  “Yeah,” I nod, the wheels in my brain slowly starting to turn. “I’ll plan an extravagant dinner and maybe even pick something up from the jewelry store.”

  “See, that’s exactly the kind of thing that would get you underneath my skirt.” There’s an awkward silence before she laughs softly. “Bad habits.”

  I crack a smile. “I appreciate the effort. And also thank you for talking to me about this. I have to get going, though, because I want to have this dinner tonight.”

  “Then you better hurry!” she says. “I’ll speak with you later.”

  “Looking forward to it,” I say, then hang up. Quickly, I unlock my computer and begin typing. I need to plan everything perfectly, and I don’t exactly have much time to get it all done.

  “Everett,” Lane laughs, stumbling over her feet. “Where are you taking me? Why can’t I look?”

  “Because it’s a surprise,” I say. I keep my hands over her eyes and carefully steer her into the dining room, making sure she doesn’t fall over anything or bump against the table. Davis looks up at me from across the room with his typical, disinterested expression, and Gloria pokes her head out from the kitchen. She gives me two thumbs up, which I appreciate.

  “Okay, are you ready?” I ask.

  “Yes!”

  “Ta-da.” I pull my hands back and watch as Lane blinks, taking in everything. “I had Gloria prepare all your favorites. I remember the few times we all had dinners together, so I asked her to make your favorite chicken and broccoli alfredo, dinner rolls, and a side salad similar to the one we had when we were in New Mexico a few years ago. And for dessert, Gloria truly outdid herself. Cookies, brownies, whatever your heart could ever want.”

  Lane looks like a kid in a candy store, and she takes a moment to absorb it all before she looks at me. “This is amazing,” she whispers. “Thank you, Everett.”

  When Lane hugs me, it makes it all worth it. I hate that she has this effect on me, because I’ve spent so many years building up my defenses, only for her to tear them down with one quick hug or a kiss on the cheek. She’s Kryptonite, this girl.

  I pull out her chair, and Lane takes a seat. Once I’m seated on the other side of the table, she says, “I can’t believe you remembered all of this.”

  “Of course I did,” I reply. “It was important to you, and even though my time with Justine was short, I… I really did love being around you. I still do.”

  “No one’s ever done this for me before,” she murmurs, picking at her pasta. “I just want to apologize for being childish yesterday. I know I shouldn’t have been so jealous, but I… I don’t know. There are no excuses.”

  “Lane, I get it. Sidney isn’t even bothered. In fact, she agreed that we can tone down the flirting because it upsets you, and that’s the last thing either of us wants. She also wants to buy one of your paintings.”

  Lane looks shocked to hear this, and I can’t help but laugh at the look on her face. “Wait, mine? Why? You sell so many more talented artists.”

  “She just said she wanted you to paint something for her. Would you be up for it?”

  “Um—yes!” she exclaims.

  Dinner goes perfectly, and after we have dessert, I take Lane out to the backyard. The garden is beautiful at night, and even Lane says so once we take a seat. She brushes a strand of hair behind her ears and looks up at me.

  “How come we’re out here?”

  “I wanted to be somewhere private when I gave you this.” I reach into my pocket and pull out a small red box. When I hand it over to Lane, her smile softens. She opens the jewelry box and gasps. Sitting inside is a necklace with a diamond pendant.

  “Everett, no…”

  “Yes,” I insist. “I want you to have that. I want you to look down and see that every time you start to question whether I care about you or not.”

  “It’s so beautiful.”

  “Here, let me help you.” I turn Lane in the opposite direction and brush her hair to one side so I can slide the necklace on even easier. I connect the two clasps and Lane turns around to face me.

  “You look stunning.” I want to say something more prophetic or deep, but all I can think about is how gorgeous Lane looks in the moonlight with this necklaces brushing between her collar bones. Paired with the white dress she wore to dinner, she looks like something out of a fairy tale. Without thinking, I draw her in and steal a soft kiss.

  Lane doesn’t shy away from returning the favor, either. She pulls me even closer so that she’s practically in my lap, kissing me back. She tastes like brownies, and I could spend all night here tasting her.

  “You didn’t have to do all this for me,” Lane says once we’ve finally paused to catch our breath. “But I’m so glad that you did. I know I was immature, but I’m just scared, Everett.”

  “Scared of what?”

  “Scared that all of this will be over before I can really appreciate it.”

  I crinkle my face and say, “Lanie, why would you think that?”

  “Because…” She shrugs, and a sad look flashes in her eyes. “Because that’s how it always is for me. Things are never stable. My life is good for a moment, and then suddenly it’s all up in the air. Dad left me. Mom left me. I’m scared that you’ll be the next one to go.”

  Hearing her worries makes my heart ache, and I want to fix every doubt she’s ever had. I want to move mountains to show her that I’m not going anywhere. I’m not like her parents, or any other man in her life.

  “Lane, I promise you that I’m going to be here for you. Not matter what happens, no matter how many times we fight, or you get jealous, or we both can’t stand the sight of each other. I’m not going anywhere. Not until you want me to.”

  Tears sparkle in her eyes, but they’re not sad. She kisses me again and again, then stops to wipe her eyes. “You’re too good to me, Everett. I don’t deserve you.”

  The irony of that statement. With all the shitty relationships I’ve had in my life, I’m the one that should be saying this to her, because it’s true. I don’t deserve someone as special as Lane. I don’t deserve to have all of her affection and care.

  I refuse to shoot myself in the foot, though. I’m not going to talk myself out of this relationship with this incredible woman. The old me, the one that still resides somewhere deep inside, can’t believe I’ve turned into such a mushball, but he doesn’t understand it. I’ve searched everywhere for a girl like Lane, and now that she’s here, I’m not going to do anything to ruin this or let her get away.

  I know what I’m feeling. I know this feeling well. It’s love. It’s the kind of love I’ve wanted for the longest time. The kind of love that sent me down the road of online dating and meeting women at bars. The kind that I thought I had with Justine, before she momentarily convinced me that it didn’t exist.

  But it does exist. It exists in Lane. Kindhearted, caring, and vulnerable Lane. This is love, and I’m fucking in love with her.

  12

  Lane

  P ainting is surprisingly hard to do while continually touching the pendant Everett gave to me. Go figure. I try to keep my mind from wandering back to it, but something about the way it feels between my fingers keeps me from making any real progress on my painting.

  No one has ever given me a gift like this, and I don’t know how to keep my hands from it. I could stare it all day. When I look back up at my painting, I sigh and decide to slip the necklace over my head and into my pocket. I need to focus on getting this done. Sidney is going to want her painting soon, and I don’t want to keep her or Everett waiting.

  I dip my brush into the gray color and continue the mountain scene, switching colors to add the snowcapped peaks on top. It looks like something Bob Ross would be quite proud of, and I smile to myself as I continue working.

  I’ve always enjoyed the act of creating something from my mind onto the canvas, and though I don’t think I have any kind of future with this, I do know that it’s something that brings me joy and makes me forget about the world around me. It helps me block out the occasional nightmare that Leon and his friends are going to come back for me. It helps me forget the fact that I haven’t been able to reach Mom in two months.

  Something isn’t right with her. We never go that long without talking, and now it’s been nearly nine weeks since I last spoke with her. Everett tries to keep me from worrying, but it’s in my nature. I don’t know whether she’s just ignoring my calls or she’s lying dead in a ditch somewhere. Both options scare me for completely different reasons.

  I know she isn’t exactly reliable, but she’s my mother. I just want to talk to her again.

  Before I can make myself upset, I close my eyes and take a deep breath, centering myself. I need to keep focused on this project and get it done soon. Once I’m not having a mild panic attack, I pick up the brush and continue to paint, humming to the song playing on my cellphone. I dip into the mossy green color and lay down some bushes, peppering them with a small collection of pink, yellow, and purple flowers.

  After another thirty minutes, everything looks complete. It’s beautiful, and I pat myself on the back for another job well done. I cross the room and take off my apron, checking the time on my phone. Almost ten. I hope Everett gets home safe, with the storm outside and all.

  Everett’s out with a new client, so I have the entire house to myself. You’d think I’d be running all over the place in my underwear like a scene from Risky Business, or calling up my friends to have an impromptu party at the mansion, but what I want to do most is pop an oven pizza in and hang out in the living room. Gloria went home for the night, so rather than having her cook me something, I unwrap the cheap freezer pizza and toss it into the oven, grabbing a bag of carrots to munch on while I wait. It’s not going to combat all the greasiness from the pizza I’ll be eating, but it makes me feel a little better.

  In the living room, I flop down on the sofa and begin flipping through channels. Since Everett made things official with me, he’s tossed aside majority of the rules, which means I’m not locked into a bedtime like some child of his. The only rule he kept intact was the one for meal attire. We still have to dress up for every meal, but it’s gotten more manageable. It also gives me an excuse to constantly order new clothes on his card.

  After fifteen minutes, I check on my food, pulling it out of the oven when it’s finished. I grab a knife from the large block on the counter, and as I start to cut into it, there’s a loud, booming knock at the door. I jump, spinning around suddenly.

  Davis usually gets the door, but he had to visit his sick brother, so I slowly make my way to the foyer, trying to peak out the window to get a better look at the person. I can’t see anything, and I’m forced to open the front door a crack.

  “Hello?” I say, looking at the man before me.

  “Hi,” he says, giving a small wave. “I know it’s late, but I was wondering if you had a phone I could use? My car is giving me trouble, and I can’t get any service out here.”

  I narrow my eyes to get a better look at him, but with the heavy rain and the coat he has over his head, I can only see his nose and mouth. Everything inside me says to close the door in his face, but I’ve also been in his situation. The only reason I was able to get Whitney to come and get me is because of the kindness of the old lady who owned the house I visited.

  “Uh…” I start, uneasy.

  “Please, I just need to call my insurance company and have them send a car out. It’ll only take a few minutes.”

  I chew on my lip before finally saying, “I have a cellphone I can let you use? I have pretty good service.”

  “That would be perfect,” he says excitedly. “I’ll even stay outside. I just really need to get home. My sitter is probably worried sick.”

  “One second,” I say. I close and lock the door, then hurry to the living room to pick up my phone. When I return, the man is still standing outside, dripping from the rain. “Here you go,” I say, handing the phone over.

  “Thank you so much,” he says. He starts dialing a number, then stops. “I just remembered something.”

  “What?”

  “I don’t need the phone.” Before I can say anything, he grabs the side of my head and slams it against the door frame. I cry out, and stumble backwards, tripping over my own feet. As my vision grows darker and my eyes fall closed, I see the man step inside the house and lock the door behind him.

  —

  I slowly come to, blinking and wincing at the intense ache in my head. Everything is fuzzy, and when I try to wipe my eyes, I realize that my wrists are bound behind me. Panic bubbles in my stomach, and I look around, trying to see where the stranger is. The last I saw him, he’d stepped into the house.

  “There she is,” he says, walking around me and coming into view. He pulls his hood back and I feel my stomach sink to my toes. I recognize him immediately. That scar across his face is unforgettable, and that wicked smile sends chills throughout my body.

 

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