Long Journey Home, page 14
Cordelia tried to rein in her unruly daughter, but it never lasted very long. The moment she was released from Cordelia’s embrace, she was a one-girl running disaster again. At times, Mr. MacArthur laughed at Cordelia’s frustration—remembering his own frustration with her when she was young. Nora was an energetic child, but compared to Emma Grace, she was sluggish.
However, thinking of her now, Mr. MacArthur couldn’t think of anyone that hadn’t been won over in the end with one impish smile from Emma Grace. She was a lovely little girl. Her hair was soft brown, like her father’s but it was a tangle of curls like her mother’s.
Her eyes were the color of his late wife’s. There was no way to tell if they were gray, green, or blue, for they seemed to change with every outfit Cordelia managed to put on her, or with every mood that captured her. When she cried, which was often and loud, her eyes were bright green, almost like Cordelia’s. When she was outside, they reflected the deep blue of the sky. And inside, they were their usual mixture of gray-green-blue.
Finally, exhausted, she’d fall asleep wherever she happened to be when she ran out of energy—sometimes under a table or draped across two stairs, sometimes tucked into a tight corner behind the divan or sprawled across her grandpa’s desk.
When she slept, she was angelic. No matter the level of irritation she evoked before her nap, when you saw this sweet baby sleeping, no one could resist her. So sweet. So delightful—that is, until she woke and began her reign of terror once more—giggling all the way.
Each member of the household dreaded the sound of absolute silence. That meant one of two things—either Emma Grace was into something or she’d fallen asleep somewhere. Either way, silence was their cue to find her.
She’d already made some permanent additions to the patterned wallpaper in her grandfather’s study. That was the day she found his ink bottle. And then there was the time she found Cordelia’s oil paints. The wall in the hallway outside the kitchen door showed signs of that escapade.
Once, she ran into the parlor covered with ash. There was ash in her hair, all over her face and mouth and on her little arms and hands. The front of her little dress was covered with it.
Cordelia slowly approached and knelt down before her.
“Emma Grace, have you been playing in the fireplace?” she asked.
Emma, knowing she was not to play there, looked straight into her mother’s eyes and shook her head.
“Are you sure?” Cordelia asked again, hoping to get a more truthful response. “Do you promise?”
She nodded without any hint of guilt on her face.
“Look at your hands, baby. What is that?”
Obediently, Emma Grace held her hands up and gazed at them.
“What is that, Emma?”
She shrugged.
“That’s ash from the fireplace. Do you know how it got all over your pretty dress and your hands and your face?”
“No.”
That was the occasion of her very first spanking. Her mother took her upstairs to the nursery and cleaned her up. Then she patiently sat with her perched upon her lap. She reminded her that good little girls must not lie to their mother and since she lied, she would be forced to punish her. She asked her to lean against the bed, which she did. Then she swatted her little behind two or three times.
Emma Grace’s face screwed into a painful grimace before she bellowed loudly, tears cascading down her cheeks in a flood. Cordelia picked her up and held her.
“Mama loves you, Emma Grace, but you must never lie to me again. Do you understand?”
“Yes… Mama,” she managed through her sobs.
“Okay, let’s go downstairs now,” Cordelia told her softly.
When Emma Grace tore out of the room and went down the stairs backwards on all fours, Cordelia hid her face behind the nursery door, not wanting her daughter to see her own tears.
She could hear her downstairs now, already running through the house. Cordelia shook her head and slowly descended the stairs to find out what mischief she’d found.
Instead of joining in, Little Nora took Cordelia’s hand and sat, sedate and proper, next to her. She looked deeply into her eyes.
“Why are you crying, Mama?” she asked.
Squeezing her into a big hug, Cordelia kissed her face until Nora’s laughter filled the parlor.
“I’m not crying now, baby. You’ve made me all happy again,” she smiled.
At some point in the past year, Nora had begun to attach herself more to Cordelia and less to Lucy. When they worked with Emma Grace on saying, “mama,” Nora picked it up, too and applied that name to Cordelia.
In a way, Lucy’s feelings had been hurt, but in another way, it freed her. She was finally able to continue her studies in between her tasks in the house. At long last, she was a student in a real school, the Baltimore Association for Moral and Educational Improvement of Colored People located within walking distance at the corner of Calvert & Saratoga. As expected, Lucy proved to be an apt pupil. She enjoyed the classes and had made several new friends.
~*~
Today was just another in a continuation of days devoted to keeping Emma Grace from destroying too many things, and trying to maintain some semblance of peace and quiet.
Cordelia had long since forgotten the days she enjoyed before Emma Grace was born—days when she could sit and daydream, or sip hot tea, or read a book. On the other hand, she’d never known the kind of joy that being a mother brought her. That was a huge surprise to everyone—including Cordelia.
Her attitude about children had always been, “oh, how adorable… and how glad I am I don’t have one.” Now she found herself absolutely devoted to this little creature. It seemed as though she constantly ran after Emma. Caring for Nora was relatively easy.
Today she was reading to them and they both seemed to enjoy the story. Even Emma Grace was sitting quietly. She snuggled next to Nora as Nora, like a little mother, put her arm around her little sister’s shoulders.
Suddenly, Emma shrieked, “Look, Mama! Look!” and ran to the front door, trying with all her might to reach the big iron doorknob. Gazing out the front window in the direction her excited daughter pointed, Cordelia was surprised to see the tall, dark soldier walking up to her front door.
He was looking down at a slip of paper he held in his hands and the brim of his hat covered his face.
“Who on earth… ” Cordelia began. “Robert?” she timidly whispered, her heart soaring with hope.
When he got to the first step, he raised his bright blue eyes to the door and she could see his face at last.
“Todd!” she cried, dropping the book at her feet.
She threw open the door and ran onto the porch in time to fairly leap into his embrace. “Oh, Todd, I’ve missed you so. Why didn’t you tell us you were coming? It’s so good to see you. What are you doing here? How long can you stay?” She laughed when she caught herself sounding like Glory with her incessant jabbering.
After Todd returned her embrace and lowered her to the porch, he looked around her to see a pair of striking blue eyes peeking around the door frame at him. He was so captured by them that he didn’t see Emma Grace until she hit him—almost literally as she grabbed him around the leg and held on for dear life, giggling.
“Emma Grace! Let go of him! Come here,” Cordelia ordered, picking up her little girl. “Todd, this is Emma Grace. And this,” she said, holding her hand out to Nora, “is someone you might want to get to know a little better.”
Nora, suddenly bashful, ran to the security of her grandfather’s lap.
“Come in, Todd. It’s warmer in here and the two of you can get acquainted. Oh, it’s so good to see you!”
Inside the house, Todd’s eyes quickly adjusted to the dim light of Mr. MacArthur’s study. Cordelia’s father stood, shifting Nora to his left side so he could extend his hand to Todd.
“Father, this is Captain Todd Otis. Todd, my father, Howard MacArthur.”
“Pleasure to meet you, Captain. My daughter has told me so much about you. You’re very special to her.”
“Thank you, sir,” he answered. “And may I say that your daughter is one of the most remarkable women I’ve ever met—and if I may amend that statement, let me say, that she is one of the most remarkable ‘people’ I’ve ever met.”
“Why, thank you, Captain—a sentiment with which I heartily agree. Please, have a seat, son.”
Todd sat on the divan and Emma Grace quickly joined him there, staring up at him with rapt attention. She reached over to pick at the gold buttons of his uniform with her tiny fingers. Cordelia gently swatted her hand away.
“Leave him alone, please, Emma Grace.”
Cordelia motioned for Nora to come to her, but she clung to her grandfather as if for dear life. Something about this stranger seemed to make her very uncomfortable.
Mr. MacArthur motioned for Cordelia to hold off for a moment so she sat across the room from Todd and Emma Grace.
“Nora,” she said, “will you do something for me?”
Nora looked shyly in her direction and nodded her head timidly.
“Will you go upstairs and get the drawings of your mother and father?”
“Yes, ma’am,” she whispered. Hesitantly gazing at her grandfather for approval, he nodded his head toward the stairs and put her down. Watching Todd the whole time, she slipped, step by reluctant step, past him and then ran upstairs as Cordelia had asked.
“I didn’t realize you made any drawings of us, Cordelia.”
“Well, they’re not perfect but they’re accurate enough, I think. From the beginning, I’ve taught her about both of you.”
About that time, Nora rejoined them clutching the drawings in her chubby hand. Obediently, she walked to Cordelia and handed them to her.
“Thank you, darling girl. Now who is this?” she asked, showing her the drawing of her mother.
“Mother,” she said, shyly.
“Right. And who is this?” she asked, showing the drawing of Todd.
“Father,” she offered.
“That’s right. And who is that?” she asked, pointing to Todd.
Nora shrugged her shoulders and crept closer to Cordelia.
Cordelia took her little hand in hers and stepped across the room to Todd. “Look again, Nora,” she urged, holding the drawing next to Todd’s face. “Do you know who this is?”
Nora looked at the drawing and then at Todd before shaking her head.
“Are you sure?”
“Father?” she asked, tentatively.
“Yes, Nora. This is your father!” Cordelia said with great excitement in her voice, patting Todd’s shoulder affectionately.
Todd, using great restraint, merely said, “Hello, Nora. It’s very nice to see you again.”
“Hello,” she replied softly.
“You’ve grown up so much since I saw you last.” Leaning toward her, he said, “Did you know that I used to rock you to sleep when you were a little baby?”
She shook her head again.
“I did. And I used to sing to you, too. And Nora, your mother and I loved you so much. I still do. I’ve wanted to see you for a long time. And now I can’t believe I’m really speaking to you. I am so happy, Nora. So very happy. Will you give me a hug?”
She looked at Cordelia, who nodded at her.
Slowly she approached Todd and held her little arms out to him. He picked his daughter up and set her on his lap. Tears sprang to his eyes as he held her.
When he released her, she slunk off of his lap and crept to her grandfather once more.
Todd’s smile was radiant when he looked at Nora. “This was a good beginning, I think,” he said with a huge sigh of relief.
Cordelia smiled her agreement.
“Where are you staying, Todd?”
“At The Pennsylvania House on the south side of Franklin Street. Do you know it? It is quite comfortable after the lodging at Fort Sill.”
Cordelia laughed. “Anything would be comfortable compared to that. But why don’t we pick up your things and bring them here? We’ve a guest room upstairs and we’d be honored if you’d stay with us while you’re in town. Besides, that would give you an opportunity to spend more time with your daughter.”
Todd looked at Mr. MacArthur, who quickly added, “Please, my boy, we really would be honored.”
“Then that settles it. I’d be happy to stay here as long as you agree to put me out if I outlast my welcome.”
Cordelia smiled, “I don’t think that could ever happen, Todd. I’ll have Lucy get your room together.”
“Lucy! Is she here? May I see her?”
“Yes, of course, she’s in the kitchen.”
“Mama, I’ll get Lucy,” little Nora offered, scrambling out of her grandfather’s grasp.
“Thank you, Nora,” Cordelia told her, blushing under Todd’s glance at Nora’s calling her ‘Mama.’
“I’m sorry, Todd. She started calling me that when we were teaching Emma Grace to say it. I didn’t see any harm in it and I believe it’s natural for her to think of me that way. She calls Nicole ‘mother’ but she calls me ‘mama’. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Cordelia, I don’t mind. Under the circumstances, I am quite pleased about it.”
“You are?”
“Absolutely! Don’t worry. You’ve done a wonderful job raising her. She’s amazing, isn’t she? And so beautiful. I owe you so much. Thank you, Cordelia.”
Mr. MacArthur spoke up. “I agree with you, Captain. Nora is an amazing child. I can’t wait for you to get to know her because I assure you that the more you know her, the more delightful she becomes. She’s brought such joy to our lives. We should thank you.”
“Captain Otis!” exclaimed Lucy as she came into the room, Nora following close behind.
“Hello, Lucy,” he answered, standing. “So nice to see you again. I actually have some news for you from your mother. She didn’t want to write to you about this. She wanted me to tell you face to face.”
“What is it? Is it Mama? Is something wrong with her?” she asked, suddenly frightened.
“No, no! I’m sorry. No, it’s nothing like that. It’s good news.”
Looking a little like the cat that ate the canary, he grinned as he broke the news.
“You’re going to have a new little brother or sister.”
Lucy’s look of shock said more than words ever could.
Cordelia rushed to her side. “Lucy, are you all right?”
“Did you hear what he said, Miz Lawson? He said… I can’t even say it.”
“He said that Bess is going to have a baby.”
“But she’s too old to have a baby. Isn’t she?”
“My goodness, Lucy, she’s not quite thirty years old,” Cordelia laughed. “Of course that’s not too old to have a baby. Are you unhappy about the prospect then?”
“No, not unhappy really. Just… well, I’d never considered this before.”
Cordelia took Lucy’s hand and told her, “Once, when Jeremiah was driving me to the Cheyenne encampment, he told me that he would like to have a child someday. But he quickly added that if Bess didn’t want to have more children, he would honor her wishes and love her no matter what. So the fact that she is with child means that Bess wanted this, too.”
Todd walked to Lucy, taking her arm gently. “I’m so sorry, Lucy. I thought you’d be thrilled. I was. And Bess fairly glows with happiness these days. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“That’s all right, Captain Otis. I suppose I’ll get used to the idea soon enough. It’s just that she has her whole life out there on the prairie and… and I’m not a part of it anymore.” Suddenly her eyes brimmed with tears. “Please, excuse me,” she said as she turned and slowly left the room.
“Well,” Todd began, looking uncomfortably at his boots, “I suppose I handled that pretty badly.”
“You handled it just fine, son,” Mr. MacArthur assured him. “Lucy will get used to the idea before you know it. Just give her some time.”
“Maybe she just needs to know that she is still part of Bess’s life,” Cordelia offered.
Todd nodded, as he sat again on the richly upholstered divan.
“Todd, I can’t get over the fact that you’re actually here. But I suppose it shouldn’t surprise me. Your last letter said that you were supremely bored at Fort Sill.”
“Yes, due to shipping irregularities, the delivery of sufficient supplies for the men and for the Indians has been delayed time and again. That has prevented us from any extensive movement. We’ve had to content ourselves with scouting the adjacent countryside.” Laughing, he continued, “We certainly know that part of the country very well indeed. And the time has been well employed in preparing both men and animals for the work at hand as well as joining in the construction effort at the fort. It was an opportune time to request a leave. They will function just fine without me, I assure you.”
Cordelia admitted to herself how much she’d missed those laughing blue eyes. She hadn’t given much thought to the comfortable days back west when she shared her dinner table on a nightly basis with the Captain—then a 1st Lieutenant.
Those were fine memories, but brought about such sadness when she thought about losing Robert the way she had. Once she realized she wasn’t going to die from her broken heart, she’d had to move forward with her life.
Life doesn’t stop while you recover from blows like that. Cordelia found that dwelling on such things interfered with her ability to give herself fully to her life without Robert. So she refrained from spending too much time remembering—at least during the day. Those were thoughts she reserved for bedtime, when she had the luxury of time, solitude and quiet for her pondering… and her tears.
Glory came to the doorway to announce that lunch would be served shortly. Cordelia introduced her to Todd. She seemed to take an immediate liking to him, as she did with almost everyone.
