The Beekeeper's War, page 14
‘Hugo’s supposed to be taking things easy after a bit of a setback last week, but when he heard that people had been hurt, he refused to keep away. I hope our being here isn’t too disruptive.’
‘Not at all,’ Pru said, aware that Matron would have something to say when she discovered visitors in the wards out of visiting hours. ‘I think Hugo’s exuberance is exactly what we all need right now. It’s been a bit heavy here since the fire and I’m sure you can imagine how well Jack’s taken to being admitted to the ward.’
Verity giggled. ‘Not very well at all, I imagine.’ She studied him. ‘Is he badly hurt?’
Pru shook her head. ‘Not really, but he has burnt his arm and hand a bit. He also has cuts and bruising and some smoke damage to his lungs.’
‘Will it stop him returning to do his duty? He’d hate not being able to fly.’
‘No, it’s only temporary.’ She was thankful he was still able to do what he loved and should be back to full strength in a week or so, although dreading him leaving to return to his unit again. She wasn’t sure how she was going to face his departure from her, especially after the shock of losing Milly, and was aware she was feeling fragile emotionally. ‘He’s a bit impatient about being restricted here though, so any distraction Hugo can provide will give him something else to focus on and that can only be a good thing.’
She realised Verity was watching her closely. ‘Would you be able to take a few minutes to walk with me?’ Verity asked. ‘I’ve been cooped up for days with Hugo and would love a little fresh air and someone different to talk to for a bit.’
Pru knew Matron was busy elsewhere and liked the thought of getting to know Verity a little better. It felt only right that she do her best to be friends with those closest to the man she loved.
‘I’d like that,’ she said honestly. She looked over at the men and seeing they were oblivious to whether she and Verity were there anyway, happily left them to their conversation. ‘Let’s go this way. We’re less likely to be seen.’
‘How thrilling.’
Pru hurried through the passage to the back door, unsure if a lady like Verity had ever passed through this way before. ‘You don’t mind, do you?’
‘No, silly. I’m loving this. It’s the most excitement I’ve had for weeks.’
They laughed. Pru wasn’t sure if Verity was teasing or telling the truth. As they reached the back door and made their way around the house to the formal terraced gardens, she couldn’t help thinking that most people probably imagined upper-class women like Verity, married to men with magnificent estates, probably spent all their time partying and entertaining – when in reality that seemed not to be the case at all.
‘What are you thinking?’ Verity asked as they walked leisurely. Pru couldn’t think how to reply. ‘Are you thinking that my life isn’t how you imagined it might be?’
Stunned to hear Verity put her thoughts into words, Pru stopped walking. She knew she needed to be honest if she wanted to be friends with this woman. ‘I was. Is that dreadfully rude of me?’
Verity grinned. ‘No. It’s honest of you and I appreciate that. There aren’t many people, apart from Hugo and those adorable men in there, who are truthful with me.’
Encouraged by Verity’s reply, Pru decided to ask about her relationship with Hugo. ‘How long have you known them all?’
Verity gave her a wistful smile. ‘Hugo was friends with my older brother, Will.’
Pru couldn’t recall meeting him. ‘Was he at the party?’
Verity shook her head slowly. ‘I wish he had been. No, he was killed early in the war.’
‘I’m so sorry. I didn’t know.’
Verity’s perfectly erect shoulders drooped slightly. ‘The men don’t talk about it much. We all loved him enormously, and then one day he was gone. I think we all grieved deeply for a long time in our own ways.’ She shrugged. ‘But what ifs and wishing don’t bring a person back to life, do they? Somehow you have to find a way to keep going.’
Pru felt a pang of fear. Was that what she would have to do if Jack didn’t return? ‘You do,’ she agreed quietly.
‘I’m grateful he lived long enough to attend my and Hugo’s wedding. He was thrilled when we fell in love, bless him.’
Pru could see how much Verity needed to confide in her and wondered how many close female friends she might have. She listened quietly as the woman spoke.
‘He always said we were perfect for each other.’ She beamed at Pru. ‘Yes, I know I’m taller than him and we do look a little odd as a couple, but he understands me and knows me better than anyone ever has, including Will. I can’t imagine loving anyone more than I do Hugo.’
Pru felt a rush of love for the woman who, like so many others, had suffered so deeply. First the loss of her beloved brother and then her husband being terribly injured. ‘It must have been terrifying to learn that Hugo had been hurt.’
Verity’s right hand went to her chest and she stopped walking for a moment. ‘I thought I would give up and die if Hugo didn’t survive. When they told me about his injuries, I think that a lot of people expected a flighty woman like me to walk away from our marriage, but that was never an option.’
‘I don’t know you very well at all,’ Pru said thoughtfully, ‘but even I can tell that your love for each other is incredibly deep. You have the sort of bond that most people would give up everything to experience, even for a short time.’
Verity looked as if she was about to cry. ‘Thank you, dearest Pru. I’m not sure if you’re right about people thinking that, but I’m grateful to hear you say it. I love him. I love his character, his funny ways and most of all I love that I’m the most important person in his life. He is devoted to me and I would walk away from everything in my life in a heartbeat if it meant keeping Hugo.’
Pru swallowed away the lump in her throat. This vile war had a lot to answer for, but one thing it had shown her, time and again, was that it not only brought out the worst in people but also the very best. She felt Verity’s delicate hand on her forearm.
‘Please don’t cry, Pru. I never meant to upset you.’
‘You haven’t, I promise. I’m happy for you both that you found each other.’ She placed her hand on Verity’s. ‘I’m very grateful Jack took me to your home that night.’
Verity pulled her into a hug, her delicate flowery perfume filling the air. ‘I’m jolly glad I met you too, Pru. You’re an extraordinarily kind and giving girl. Jack is very lucky to have found you.’
‘Thank you, but I feel like I’m the lucky one.’
Verity’s arms dropped away and they began walking again. ‘We were told what Jack did, racing back into the building when he realised that Monty and your friend were trapped inside. I worry sometimes that he’s too brave for his own good. He was lucky this time, as he has been several times before.’ She went silent and Pru could tell Verity was leaving many things unsaid. ‘We just have to hope he doesn’t put his own safety aside again. I worry that Jack Garland’s like a cat and always landing on his feet but at some point he’s going to use up all of his nine lives.’
Pru shivered. ‘Let’s hope this war ends before that happens.’
Sixteen
Jack
September 1917
By the end of the first week in the ward Jack was irritable and by the second he threatened to discharge himself if Doctor Parslow didn’t allow him to spend time doing what he chose. He loved seeing Pru each day but the frustration of being near her and keeping things sensible between them while also wanting to take their romance to another level and risk leaving her a widow was getting to him.
‘I’m going crazy stuck here,’ he moaned, not wishing to admit how hard he found it, being near to her each day and having to act as if there was nothing between them; having to contend with snatched smiles across the ward and her hand grazing his whenever she tended to his dressings. ‘I need to fly again.’
He didn’t miss the hurt expression on her face and tried to soften his words. ‘I at least need to be let out of this place to go for a walk. It’s my hand and arm that are burnt, not my feet.’
‘I’ll speak to Doctor Parslow and see what he says.’
‘It’s fine. I’ll do it.’ He checked no one was listening. ‘I need to be busy, Pru. I can’t be stuck in there any longer.’
‘I imagine you need some privacy, too,’ she said, bandaging his arm, having changed the dressing. ‘I think I’d go a bit mad being in here night and day without a little time away.’
He reached out and took her hand, keeping it below the level of the bed so no one could see he was holding it. ‘I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be grouchy and I have loved being able to see you for longer, but I’d rather we were alone and able to talk freely.’ He lowered his voice. ‘I need to kiss you.’
He saw the sides of her mouth turn up in a smile and her dimple appear in her left cheek and was glad he had cheered her up again after snapping at her earlier.
What was he doing saying such things to her? He felt irritated with himself. He needed to hold back. He might be stuck in this place now but soon he would be returning to fly and that meant risking his life once again. He needed to be sensible, and telling the woman he loved that he wanted to kiss her was hardly that.
‘It’s probably a good thing that I am stuck in here and you’re busy working.’ He smiled to soften his words. She slipped her hand from his and continued finishing what she was doing. He watched her concentrating on pinning the end of the bandage neatly and didn’t think he could love her more than he did now. She was so caring, thoughtful and loyal and he couldn’t be the one to chance ruining her life by encouraging her love for him.
‘There,’ she said, taking the scissors and the bowl with his old dressing in it. ‘You’ll do for now.’ She smiled at him and they stared at each other. He could see how much she longed to be alone with him. ‘I’d better be running along. Speak to the doctor and maybe we can take a walk to see your beehives a bit later?’
He nodded then watched her walk away. She was even happy to go with him to watch the bees, though he doubted she really had any interest in them. Maybe in time, he mused.
Having put his foot down with Doctor Parslow, Jack waited for Pru at the end of her shift.
‘This is what we all need,’ he said, holding her hand as they walked along the path and into the shade of the woods. ‘Fresh air, and plenty of it.’
‘I don’t care where we are as long as I’m with you,’ she admitted. ‘I wish you didn’t have to leave me behind again.’
He put his arm around her shoulder and bent to kiss her. ‘I feel the same way, sweetheart. But you’re safer here, I can assure you.’
Her frown made him want to kick himself. Why didn’t he think before speaking when he was around her? ‘I’ll be fine though,’ he said, wondering why he was giving her false hope. ‘I’ll do my best to stay out of danger. Hopefully this war will end soon.’
‘We keep saying that,’ she answered, her voice hollow as if she was losing hope of that happening.
He stopped walking and gave her a pointed stare. ‘It will, Pru. Believe it. Then all this will be over and…’ He hesitated, wishing he knew for a fact that he would be around when the fighting came to its conclusion. ‘And then we’ll be together. We have to be positive, my darling.’
‘I know, but it doesn’t make it any easier.’
He tucked a loose strand of hair behind her left ear. ‘When we’re married, we’ll only have ourselves to please. Where would you like to live?’ he asked, determined to take her mind off all that had happened recently. He knew it was wrong to give her false hope but they could dream, couldn’t they? What was life without dreams?
She sighed happily. ‘I’d like to live in a cottage near the sea somewhere.’
He pictured a stone cottage on the shores of an isolated beach where they could live peacefully alone. ‘How would it look?’
‘Um, it’ll have a pale-blue painted door with a window with blue shutters either side, which we’ll close during storms.’
He pulled her closer picturing their imaginary home. ‘There will be storms?’
‘Or course!’ She laughed. ‘But we’ll be tucked up safely inside in front of a roaring fire while the wind is howling all around us and the waves are crashing against the beach.’
Her words conjured up images of the two of them waking in their bedroom the morning after a storm, the sunshine streaming through the slats in the closed shutters and nothing for them to do all day but lie in each other’s arms. ‘It can’t come soon enough for me.’ He kissed her neck, making her shiver.
‘Nor me,’ she said dreamily. ‘I think about it every day.’
‘I’ll picture this when I’m back flying,’ he said. ‘It’ll be the thought of you and me in our cottage that will keep me going.’
She turned to him and wrapped her arms around his waist, clinging on to him. ‘I wish with all my heart that you didn’t have to leave me again,’ she whispered. ‘I’m sorry.’
‘What for?’ he asked, kissing the top of her head as it rested against his chest. ‘I feel the same way you do.’
‘But it’s not your fault you have to leave,’ she said, not looking at him. ‘I’m sorry. I’m being selfish.’
Putting a finger under her chin, he raised it so she had no option but to look up at him. ‘You’re no more selfish than me. I promise I’ll do whatever it takes to come back to you. Never doubt that for a moment, my darling. While there’s a breath in my body, I’ll fight my way back to you. Remember that.’
‘Oh, Jack, I love you so very much it hurts.’ She stood on tiptoes and slipping her arms around his neck, pulled him down to her so their lips met. ‘I never knew love could be this wonderful, or this painful.’
He held her tightly, never wanting to let her go. ‘I was thinking the same thing.’ He sighed heavily. ‘We’re lucky to have met each other, if a little unfortunate with our timing, I guess.’
‘I know you say you don’t want to leave me, but whenever you return to flying there’s always an excitement in your voice,’ she said, taking him aback.
‘What do you mean?’ He knew full well what she was alluding to but hated her to think that it was because he did want to leave her.
He moved back slightly and looked her in the eye. ‘It’s not so much excitement as determination to go and do what I can to pay back those responsible for killing Verity’s brother Will and so many of my men who never made it home. Even Monty and Hugo, who are back where they belong, are shadows of their former selves. It’s that anger and determination that stops me from being afraid.’
Pru looked aghast at his words. ‘You? Afraid?’
He grinned at her. ‘I might have done a few things that some people, like Monty, consider brave, but believe me when I say I’m only human and I feel fear like everyone else. I probably just hide it better than most.’ He hugged her to him. ‘Don’t look so shocked.’
‘Actually that makes me feel much better.’
Confused, he frowned at her. ‘How?’
Pru laughed. ‘Because, Jack, if you feel fear then it means you’ll take time to consider whether or not the danger you’re putting yourself in is worth it.’
‘It does?’ Now he was the one feeling bemused.
‘Yes, because fear makes you stop and think, if only for a second.’
‘If you say so, then I’ll have to take your word for it.’
She slapped him playfully on his arm and he yelled in pain, grabbing it with his other hand.
Pru gasped. ‘Jack, oh heavens. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.’
He let go of his arm and pulled a face at her. ‘I’m only teasing.’
‘You brute,’ she said, slapping him harder. This time it did hurt a little but he had no intention of upsetting her further by letting her know.
‘Let’s go and see your beehives now.’
He took her hand and they walked through the woods, then the wildflower meadow, each lost in their own thoughts. This was all he needed, he reflected, breathing in the sweet summer air. His hand in hers, a summer’s day and peace and quiet. Would they be lucky enough to experience this together after the war?
They stood in the walled garden near the beehives, his arm around her slender shoulders and hers around his waist. ‘Would you mind if we had a couple of beehives behind our cottage?’
Pru smiled up at him. ‘You can have whatever you want.’
‘It’s going to be perfect, isn’t it?’ he said, allowing himself the luxury of dreaming about their future again.
‘Make love to me,’ she said, her voice quiet.
Jack froze. Had he misheard? ‘Pardon?’
‘I think you heard me.’
He didn’t know what to do. ‘I, er…’ His mind raced. If he agreed, which he desperately wanted to, then he was going against all he had promised himself where Pru was concerned. If he said no then she would feel rejected. Hurt. He couldn’t do that do her.
Seventeen
Pru
September 1917
Pru wasn’t sure it he was stunned or horrified by what she had said. She felt him tense and braced herself for his rejection. Now that she had said the words aloud, she realised she needed him to show her what it would be like to be loved by him, just in case. She forced the thought away but it bounced right back. What if, despite Jack’s best efforts, something did happen to part them and he was unable to come back to her? Would she regret never making love to him? Yes, she thought.
‘Jack, you’re going away soon.’ She took a deep breath to muster the strength to say what she needed to share with him. ‘I’ll hope and pray with all my heart that you come back to me.’
