Tank, page 22
“Who said anything about sleeping?” I gently take his forearm and lead him into the bedroom. I walk slowly and try my best not to rush him, even though all I want to do is throw him to the ground and ride him like a damn pony. His injuries wouldn’t thank me for that, and he’d certainly be feeling a tad resentful if it caused him to bust open those stitches he keeps pawing at like a wounded puppy.
“Lie back and I’ll make it all better,” I say, and he eases back onto the nest of pillows surrounding the headboard. Carefully, I work his pants down his hips, mindful of his leg wound, and a devilish smile turns my mouth up at the corners when I see how hard he is for me. I remove my own clothes and crawl up the bed towards him.
The two of us have been cooped up in this house since he came home from the hospital, and you’d think that with nothing else to do we would have seen our way to getting lost in one another again, but he’s been so badly injured, and me? Well, I’ve been doing a little healing of my own.
While I haven’t so much as looked at a line, the craving hasn’t exactly gone away. There have been a handful of times since we fled that house that I’ve been tempted to drown out the memories with any sort of drug I could get my hands on, but what would be the point? It won’t take the pain away indefinitely, and in the end it just makes me feel worse. Besides, killing myself with smack after Tank fought so hard to be here, to be with me, just seems kinda rude.
Gingerly, I climb into his lap and slip a hand between us. I stroke his cock, sliding the head back and forth through my wet heat before positioning him at my entrance. Grasping his shoulder for support, I slowly inch my weight down. I’m met with no resistance, just a satisfied grunt, but when I start to rock gently back and forth, Tank winces.
“You okay?”
“Yeah,” he says, but his jaw is clenched tight and his eyes are squeezed shut. Unsure, I gently circle my hips. He sucks in a sharp breath that I mistake for pleasure, so I do it again. “Ow. Ow. Fuck, babe, get off.”
“Oh God, I hurt you.” I scramble from his lap, and wind up accidently kneeing him in the balls.
“Jesus, fuck,” he shouts, attempting to cup his hands around them, but he can’t with the casts.
“Maybe we should give it another week.” I laugh, but I’m met with a scowl.
“Maybe you should be fuckin’ careful where you’re steppin’,” he says
I give him a condescending little pat on the shoulder. “Aww poor baby. You need me to kiss it better?
“Yeah,” he snaps. “I’m thinkin’ that’s the best fuckin’ idea you ever had.”
I crawl down the bed, making sure to give him an eyeful of my pink pussy as I go. Before I’ve even laid a hand on him, Tank groans, and I allow myself a secret smile while I’m facing the opposite direction, because it’s nice to be appreciated.
I settle on my knees beside him, and take hold of his cock, sliding my hand up his hard length. He groans, and I feel him relax further into the bed. I lower my head and run my tongue along the slit, collecting a sticky drop of pre-cum and I swallow it down, and then I swallow him down too, all the way to the base of his cock, until I’m gagging on it.
“Fuck,” he groans, and pushes his hips towards me.
This time I do choke. And I release him, my throat burning and eyes watering. “Bastard.”
“You love it.”
“I love you,” I whisper, with a grin. And he sends me this pleading look in an attempt to direct my mouth back to his cock. I narrow my eyes when he doesn’t respond, and he rolls his.
“You need me to do this now?” he asks, exasperated. I just glare at him, which of course means that I do need him to say it now, and he’s an idiot for asking. “Fine. I love you enough to put you on the back of my bike and keep you there for good. I love you enough to be the only woman I bring home to my mother—even if you did steal her drugs—and I love you enough to ask you to stay here with me, permanently.”
I swallow past the lump forming in my throat. Tank’s eyes are fever bright and his brows pinch together like he’s in pain. “I love you so much that the idea of losing you to anyone makes my blood boil in my veins. I love you enough to take down every motherfucker who might try to take you from me.” He reaches the better of his two injured hands toward me, and gently strokes my cheek. “I love you enough to ask you to be my old lady for good.”
I sit up, warily meeting his eyes. “What are you saying, Tank?”
“I’m sayin’ I want you to fuckin’ wear my ring and show every other bastard on the face of the planet who you belong to.”
“Jonah—”
“Shit.” He allows his head to fall back against the headboard, closing his eyes as he says, “I didn’t think this through at all.”
“Oh,” I say, and I try not to sound as dejected as I feel, but … fuck, that hurts. It’s not that I’m dying to get married. Hell, before this conversation I’ve never even thought about it. That was something other women did, not club whores, but I find that it hurts as if I had really wanted it.
“Relax, Warrior Princess, I meant what I said. I’ve thought about it a lot. For a long-arse time. I never wanted to get married. I never wanted anyone dependin’ on me, you know? But I think about you heading back to the clubhouse, or going it alone now that you’re free, and I don’t want that. It isn’t safe with me. I’m always gonna have people gunnin’ for my head, and maybe I’m fuckin’ selfish for even askin’, but I fuckin’ love you, babe.” He shakes his head and gives me a wry smile. “Much as I don’t want to, much as I tried not to feel anything, you had to get under my skin and pitch your fuckin’ flag there, and that’s where you’ve damn well stayed since the day we met.
“So I’m a cunt for asking you with my dick hangin’ out, and I ain’t got a ring, ’cause I’m an arsehole like that, and you know I’m gonna be a pain in your arse more than I’m gonna be the fuckin’ man of your dreams. But I’m askin’ if you’ll make me the happiest man on the fuckin’ planet?”
Tears spill over my cheeks and I think it’s the first time I’ve ever cried from being truly happy, but all I can do is bury my face in my hands and shake my head.
“Well, don’t leave a man hangin’. Is that a no or a fuckin’ yes?” he asks, and the pinched expression, the worried gaze, the look of sheer terror on his face is priceless.
“Yes, Tank. I’ll marry you.”
He smiles. “You will, huh?”
I nod and scramble closer, throwing my arms around him. Tank flinches, his whole body going rigid as a board, and he bares his teeth in a grimace.
“Shit, I’m sorry,” I say, scurrying away from his injured side.
“Come ’ere,” he says, tilting his head in a gesture that implies that I should cuddle up to him. I smile pitifully and climb over his lap, carefully settling in on his opposite side. His arm slides around me, his cast gently resting on the curve of my naked hip. “Love you, babe.”
A contented laugh escapes me. “I know.”
I glance at my hand, wondering what it would look like with a wedding band on it. Alien would be my guess, and I’d likely have to start taking better care of my nails, which kinda sucks.
“We’ll get you a ring,” Tank says.
I shake my head. “I don’t care about that.”
“I care,” he says, and the look he gives me is warning enough not to argue. “It’s gonna be a really fuckin’ big ring that every motherfucker on the planet will see. I’m gonna get one so big that fuckin’ thing will be seen from space.”
I shake my head. I don’t want a big fuck-off diamond. I just want him. But if it’ll make him happy, I’ll wear whatever the hell he wants me to, and I’ll love every second of it. I cuddle into his side and wonder what our wedding will look like, what our life together will look like.
“Now, how about that blow job?” he says.
I sit up and give him an incredulous look. “You’re a pig.”
“Yeah, but I’m your pig,” he says, grinning like a damn fool.
“Yes you are,” I say, and I slip down the bed and show him with my hands and lips and tongue just how happy that makes me.
Tank may not be the perfect man. He may be stubborn, demanding, infuriating, and an outright arsehole when he wants to be, but he’s mine. Just like this crazy fucked up life I’ve led is mine.
And I may make more stupid decisions along the way. I may always battle with my addiction. There may be times when I remember all that my father did, and I may be tempted to check out early. Who can say what the future will hold? It’s certainly been no fairy-tale so far.
I’m not a princess in a castle. There’s no extravagance in my past, nor is there likely to be any in my future. But there is love, and endurance, and the knowledge that I didn’t give up. I fought to be here.
I’m not a hero, I’ve never saved a life, but I saved my own, and that’s enough.
We’re enough.
Carmen Jenner is a thirty-something, USA TODAY and international bestselling author of the Sugartown, Savage Saints, and Taint series.
Her dark romance, KICK (Savage Saints MC #1), won Best Dark Romance Read in the Reader’s Choice Awards at RWDU 2015.
A tattoo enthusiast, hardcore MAC addict and zombie fangirl, Carmen lives on the sunny north coast of New South Wales, Australia, where she spends her time indoors wrangling her two wildling children, a dog named Pikelet, and her very own man-child.
A romantic at heart, Carmen strives to give her characters the HEA they deserve, but not before ruining their lives completely first … because what’s a happily ever after without a little torture?
Stay up to date with Carmen’s latest works at: http://www.carmenjenner.com
Welcome to Sugartown (Sugartown Series #1)
Enjoy Your Stay (Sugartown Series #2)
Greetings from Sugartown (Sugartown Series #3)
Now Leaving Sugartown (Sugartown Series #4)
KICK (Savage Saints MC #1)
Revelry (Taint #1)
COMING SOON
Harley and Rose
HURT (Taint #2)
CLOSER (Taint #3)
JETT (Savage Saints MC #3)
GRIM (Savage Saints MC #4)
KILLER (Savage Saints MC #5)
Acknowledgements. The very thing that strikes fear into the heart of every author. Wait, maybe that’s just me. You’d think this would be the fun part, right? You spend months writing the book, slowly leaking little bits of your soul into it and day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute, second by second you come closer and closer to the end. Finally all of your heart, all of the parts of you that are yours to give, bleed out onto the page and the book is complete. You’re sated, the book gods are happy you’ve paid the tithe in blood and feels, and days of unkempt hair, and chipped nails, and sadly, yes, some days that you haven’t even bothered to change out of your pyjamas. The book is done, and you’re happy, you’re free, but then the dread creeps in … what if I forget to thank someone?
Seven books on and this never gets any easier. The first time you release a book it seems as though there are entire villages of people to thank, and as you release more books, you find your own feet, the network of people involved in the making of your little slice of literary heaven becomes smaller, but no less important.
So let’s hope I don’t forget anyone …
To my darling non-husband Ben, you saved me then and every day since. I love you so much! Read my damn books already!
Ava Rose and Ari Danger, I love you more than the sun, and more than the stars, and more than the moon, and more than mars, and WAY MORE THAN … CHICKENS!
To my gorgeous family both blood and extended, I LOVE YOU!
To my beautiful beta readers Kristine from Glass Paper Ink Bookblog, Ali from Black Heart Reviews, and Author Simone Nicole, you girls are always there. You always make time in your crazy schedules to give me thorough and honest feedback, and I appreciate you all so much! I can’t imagine ever releasing a book without having your eyes on it first. THANK YOU!!!
Kristine, more than MAC, baby cakes! More than MAC!
Ali, what do I say after all this time that hasn’t already been said in the previous six novels? THANK YOU! I love you, and where’s my fucking ranch dressing?
Simone, I’m not giving you another book to beta until you give me yours. Get writing, missy. Love you, lady!
Lauren McKellar (#McStellar), thanks for McStellarising my words, for fitting me in and working around our ridiculous schedules, for the encouragement, the sprints, and for always making me laugh during the editing process.
Arijana Karčić from Cover It! Designs, thank you for creating such incredible covers for this series! Without that first pre-made, the Savage Saints MC might never have happened.
Heartfelt thanks to Emily from E. M. Tippetts Book Designs. You and your team are superstars! Here’s to many more beautiful interiors together!
To my Sugar Junkies, I’d be lost without you! Thank you for the hours of man candy on #SexySaturday—no really, all Carmen Jenner characters past and present thank you for contributing to their super special Alpha hotness—and for rocking my world with your excitement, your kindness, your extreme pimping skills and your reviews, no matter how long or short!
Kylie from Give Me Books, I ADORE YOU! Thank you for taking on my Cover Reveals, Release Day Parties and Blitz’s! You go above and beyond, lady! Working with you and your team is so damn easy! Special thanks to Caroline for putting up with my sporadic replies while editing TANK.
Beth Cranford, no one rocks a release day party like you, baby! Thanks for enduring the long hours, and for keeping the laughs coming even though I’m sure sometimes you’re dying to curl up and go to sleep! I freaking adore your face!
And finally a huge, heartfelt THANK YOU full of red lipstick, cupcakes, margaritas and sexy man candy—all of my favourite things—to the readers and bloggers who follow, support, pimp, review, talk me up, share in the excitement of a new release, who come out to signings, and who keep coming back for more. No matter how messed up I make my character’s. Without you I wouldn’t get to do what I love!
TANK
Copyright © 2015 Carmen Jenner
Published by Carmen Jenner
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews.
This is a work of fiction.
Names, characters, businesses, organisations, places, events, and incidents are either of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This book may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you are reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should return it to the seller and purchase your own copy.
Thank you for respecting the author’s work and for not making me set some very pissed off Savage Saints MC bikers on you.
Published: Carmen Jenner September 24th 2015
carmenjennerauthor@gmail.com
Editing: Lauren McKellar
Cover Design: © Arijana Karčić, Cover It! Designs
Formatted by:
www.emtippettsbookdesigns.com
Table of Contents
Title Page
About TANK
Quote
Dedication
PREFACE
PROLOGUE - TANK
1 - IVY
2 - TANK
3 - IVY
4 - IVY
5 - TANK
6 - IVY
7 - IVY
8 - TANK
9 - IVY
10 - TANK
11 - TANK
12 - TANK
13 - TANK
14 - TANK
15 - IVY
16 - IVY
17 - IVY
18 - IVY
19 - TANK
20 - IVY
21 - IVY
22 - IVY
23 - TANK
24 - IVY
25 - IVY
26 - IVY
27 - IVY
28 - TANK
29 - IVY
EPILOGUE - IVY
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
MORE FROM THE AUTHOR
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Copyright Notice
Carmen Jenner, Tank
