Pheromone, page 33
part #1 of For the Love of Aliens Series
“How long did it take you to figure out you’d grabbed the wrong woman?” I ask with a smirk. I shouldn’t do it, poke the bear and all that, but I can’t help feeling like he isn’t going to hurt me. “After you’d raped her and stolen her blood?”
He takes a step away from me, wings spreading fully out to either side of him. I wish I could lie and say they were ugly or weird, but they’re not. They’re absolutely stunning, filling the entire space from wall to wall and still unable to extend to their full span. Chemicals and pheromones swirl in the air, and I have to close my eyes to stay standing. His smell. Goddamn it.
“I have never—nor would I ever—bed another female,” he hisses at me, like legitimately. It’s part of an overall sneer as he turns, his antennae swiveling away from me like he wishes he could get as far from me as possible. “I had but to lick your blood directly from her skin, and I was brought to my knees with sickness.” He closes his eyes and lets his wings fall. They swirl like fabric behind him. He glares over his shoulder at me, but I refuse to look directly at him. It’s easier if I stare out the window at Abraxas’ planet. I’m not imagining it: it’s getting smaller by the minute. “I was so ill that I could not get back to the stall in time to purchase you.”
“Abraxas—the Aspis male—he saved my life.” I smile tightly as I finally force myself to look back and meet his gaze again. “Looks like you owe him yours, too.” The prince and I, we could be so happy together. The thought doesn’t feel like my own, and I choke on it. No way would I ever have such sappy thoughts about someone I just met. Abraxas … I was starting to have sappy thoughts about him.
I’d made up my mind to stay with him.
“Nothing in this life is free or easy. To get something worthwhile, one must give something up in return.”
I’d be willing to do that, to give up fucking everything. A love like I felt with him, someone who is always trustworthy and honest, who proves themselves day in and day out with actions, that’s rare. It’s a once in a galaxy event, and it’s been stolen from me.
“I will have his corpse brought to your rooms,” the prince breathes, and I can see it written all over his face. He’s in abject shock. He can’t believe I’m standing here defying him like this. He better get used to it if he intends to keep me around.
I step forward and—willingly this time—put my hands on the prince’s shoulders. His gloved hands immediately find my waist, and even through the fabric, I can feel the heat of him. Just as Abraxas said: the blood sings. I can feel my own pumping and pushing at my skin, wanting this man. I can feel him yearning just as desperately in return. I put my lips near his ear, and he sweeps his wings around me. They settle against my back, so soft and warm and comforting. I grit my teeth.
“If you hurt Abraxas, I will never love you.”
It might seem like a weird thing to say, but I know he has to hear it. Because that’s what he wants. I am more than just my blood. He wants me to want him. He’s desperate for it. It’s my only power on this stupid ship.
“You consent to my feeding?” he asks, sliding his gloved hands from my naked waist to my hips. I exhale and close my eyes, pushing back the deep sadness inside of me. I’m sorry, Abraxas. I’m so fucking sorry.
I don’t know what a feeding from him entails exactly, but it’s going to happen whether I want it to or not. He’s starving to death. He doesn’t even have a choice. I close my eyes.
“I consent.”
The prince exhales against the side of my neck, and then he bites me. His teeth sink into my skin, right over the spot where Abraxas last bit me. Pleasure arcs through my body in a shameful, horrifying wave. My knees weaken, and it’s only his strong grip on my hips that keeps me upright. I fall into him by accident, and he tucks me close, one hand against my back, the other around my middle.
He draws back slightly, his breath feathering against the wound, and then he dips his tongue to the bloodied spots on my throat. He doesn’t just lap at the liquid. Oh no. That’d be too easy. His tongue slides into one of the holes. I can feel him inside my skin, in my very veins.
And it feels great.
It feels amazing.
Tears slide down my cheeks as I squeeze my eyes shut as tightly as I can, trying and failing to resist succumbing to the heat of him, to the strange intimacy of being both food and sex, to the moan that slips from his throat. It’s entirely raw and so unbelievably personal.
Rurik withdraws his tongue, and I feel every inch of it as it slides from my body and retreats into his mouth. With a sigh, he pulls his wings back and lets go of me entirely, stepping away to study me. I almost fall, but he catches me by the shoulders and sets me in the room’s only chair.
The prince rests his hands on the backrest, an arm on either side of me.
“If only you didn’t look like your entire life was over.” He kisses me on the forehead with those bloodied lips of his, and then stands up. I wrap my arms around myself and turn away, face blazing with heat, body trembling. I’m so turned-on right now, and I hate myself for that.
I don’t want anyone but Abraxas.
Even if I did, I definitely wouldn’t want this guy.
He watches me for some time before picking up the discarded device from earlier. He tucks it onto his head and taps the earpiece.
“Bring the princess’ handmaiden,” he says, and I finally drag my gaze back to him.
Looking into his eyes is like being punched in the heart.
“Do I have free will?” I ask him, but he doesn’t respond. He just blinks so slowly at me that I wonder if he’s ever going to open his eyes. “Then my entire life is over.”
The prince doesn’t respond, taking a red robe from a hook on the wall. He swings it around my shoulders and clasps it for me, arranging the fabric to cover my body. A panel in the wall slides open, and there she is: it’s Avril, the medic. I owe her my life, and I never had the chance to thank her for that.
“Eve!” she shouts, and I’m surprised and pleased that she remembered my name. She stumbles into the room, but Rurik steps between us. Avril comes up short at his glare as several guards crowd into the room behind her, weapons out but not yet pointed at anyone. They don’t have guns, by the way. Oh no. They’re wielding spears.
“Is this the etiquette you were taught?” the prince asks, his voice a terrifying whisper. It doesn’t need to be loud. It’s saturated with authority. “Is that how one of your station should greet the Imperial Princess?”
The Imperial What’s-It-Now? I know it makes a certain bizarre sense. If I’m the prince’s … whatever … then I guess princess is a fitting title. Weird as fuck though. I’m sure I’ll have as much power as princesses had in Earth’s history. Which is to say, none at all.
“My wings should be torn from my back,” Avril breathes, dropping her head. Her red hair hangs loose, one small braid on either side of her face with flowers woven in. Her face glitters with makeup—a dramatic recreation of the natural two-toned pattern on the faces of the … what did Abraxas call them? Vestalis. Right.
Avril wears a ridiculous collar of shimmery red fabric. It’s a good foot or more higher than her head, paired with a cloak that looks heavy enough to buckle the knees. Underneath all of that, she wears a long-sleeved dress with a dramatically low necklace and full skirts. It’s as white as the prince’s wings, with a red furred belt at the waist.
I’m still processing the outfit when the prince steps to the side and Avril bows, dropping to one knee and placing a single finger against her lips.
“Your Imperial Princess, it is my greatest pleasure and infinite privilege to serve you.” Avril remains where she is on the floor as I gape at her.
“What have they done to you?” I whisper. It’s not like I knew the girl well. Hell, I knew her for all of five bloodstained, alien-filled seconds. But she was fierce. She and Connor, they saved my life, threw the lawyer under the bus (or in the slug, so to speak), and defended us with makeshift weapons.
“My wings should be torn from my back,” Avril repeats without looking up.
Erm.
‘Kay.
“This girl will serve as your lady-in-waiting. She is still being trained, but I believe you will benefit from human companionship.” I don’t look at the pompous ass when he speaks. I’m still gaping at Avril. She lifts her head slightly and notices my, uh, lack of proper clothing. I’ve just shifted and the robe has fallen open up to the thigh, revealing everything but the glow between my legs. Luckily nobody can see that without, you know, getting up close and personal.
The prince hisses, and the guards turn in near perfect unison to face the wall. When Avril doesn’t immediately avert her eyes, he steps toward her like he intends to punish her somehow.
“Stop that.” I shove up to my feet, arranging the robe so that I’m covered. “You don’t own my nakedness.”
“Yes, I do.” He says that like it’s the most reasonable statement in the world. Or … the galaxy? Whatever. “Come. I will escort you to our rooms.” He makes another sound, and the guards turn back toward us, stepping aside to leave the doorway clear.
A girl steps into the opening. She looks human, but with exaggerated features. Big, red eyes. Shock-white hair that fans around her dramatically and falls all the way to her calves. She’s delicate and petite with small breasts, narrow hips, and a flouncy white dress with a belt like Avril’s. She’s even got the ugly cloak with the collar on. Red metal rabbit-ear antennae stick up from the crown of her head. Also, she’s barefoot and really, really weird looking.
Something about her bothers me instantly.
“We recovered this Cartian female”—there’s that word again, Cartian—“from the ship fragment. She explained that you had become close recently, and I thought you might appreciate the additional companionship.” The prince looks from her to me, as if he’s expecting a thank you of some sort.
The girl kneels and places a single finger against her lips.
“Your Imperial Majesties, my name is Raina, and it is my pleasure and privilege to serve.” She drops her hand and then lifts her gaze up to mine, the edge of her lip curving up in the slightest hint of a smirk. I swear to God, if this is who I think it is … “For those who are uneducated in binary code and could not make the prior translation, I may also be known to some as Zero-One-Zero-One-Zero-Zero-One-Zero—” She goes through the laborious process of repeating all forty digits.
My eye twitches.
Yep. It’s Zero alright.
The AI chatbot bitch has a body?
“Was she a brain in a vat?” I ask, turning to look at the prince. He seems startled that I’ve actually asked him a question—and in a relatively peaceable tone, too. “Or a computer?”
“Her cerebral system was located in an emergency medical hold onboard the ship, if that is what you are inquiring about.”
I glare at him.
“So she is a person and not a computer?” I clarify as he tries to make eye contact with me. I won’t look at him. When our eyes meet, I feel things. Not my own feelings, mind you, but whatever manufactured garbage he’s forcing on me.
“She is a Cartian female whose cerebral system has been placed into an android.” The prince sighs and steps into the hallway, looking back to see if I’m following. I just stand there. “She will be serving us for the length of our natural lives in exchange for this host body, and will function primarily as your personal bodyguard.”
Fantastic. Not only am I trapped on this ship, but I’m trapped here with Zero. If given the choice between her and Tabbi Kat … I’d fling myself into the darkest recesses of space.
“She’s going to try to kill me,” I tell him matter-of-factly, and he frowns down at her.
“You claimed to be a trusted companion of the Imperial Princess.” The prince stares at Zero, and she rises to her feet. But not like it’s of her own volition—like it’s his volition. Her eyes meet mine, and I see for the very first time how afraid she actually is. She’s looking at me with a silent plea that a rational person would ignore, but that I … Damn it. I thought all along that I was a cold, heartless, apathetic bitch. That doesn’t necessarily appear to be the case. “Shall I have your head removed and dissected down to its most useful parts?”
Holy shit. I have to fix this.
“Wait, wait, wait.” I finally step forward, sweeping past poor Avril who’s still kneeling down on the floor. I guess she’s waiting for a command or something? I have no idea. “Avril,” I hiss, gesturing rapidly with my arm. She scrambles to her feet to join me and we slip out the door and into the hallway.
There’s an entire wall of windows here, a vast galaxy of stars and glittering cosmic dust and distant planets sparkling like gemstones. I almost puke again, slapping a hand over my mouth. I turn to the prince and force my arm back down by my side.
“What I mean to say is, how do you know that she won’t go rogue in that android body of hers?” I stare at the markings on his face so that I don’t have to look at his eyes. He notices, and it pisses him off. I catch a glimpse of his bloodstained lips curling up in a sneer.
“This.” He taps two gloved fingers against Zero’s neck, and I follow the motion, noticing a glowing red lace choker at her throat. It was partially obscured by the cloak before, and I didn’t quite notice it. Looks like a much prettier version of the creepy veins that are all over the ceilings and walls in this room, too. “I have complete control over her at all times. But if you do not like her, I will have her replaced immediately.”
“No!” Maybe I’m being too forceful, but the sound comes out in a near shout. The prince narrows his eyes on me, but doesn’t respond. “She was right. We’re best friends.” I give Zero a look and now it’s my turn to smirk. I’m royalty here, bitch. Even if I don’t want to be. And if I am, you know what? I have the upper hand here. “Zero is sweet and submissive, and she understands that I’m the superior one between us. I don’t think we’ll have any problems.”
Ooooh boy, the look she gives me. I hope like hell the prince knows what he’s talking about or else Zero really is going to kill me in my sleep.
“Good. Anything less than complete submission and deference to the Imperial Princess will be punished severely.” He curls his lip at Zero before he moves past her to stand in front of me. This close, the heat of his body is like a punishment. And his scent? I know I keep harping on it, but it’s like a drug. It makes me forget what’s going on and what I need to be fighting for.
Abraxas. Jane.
He holds out an arm for me to take, and I just stare at it. Should I play nice instead? I’ll admit: that thought did not occur to me until literally just now. Why shouldn’t I schmooze the guy and try to get what I want out of him? He’s desperate for me to like him, and I have no idea why he cares. He could just as easily lock me in a room and have his way with me whenever he pleased.
My body erupts in a cold sweat, and I take his offered arm. Maybe I should try the nice route first?
“Where are we going?” I ask as he starts down the hallway in a confident stride, boots loud against the floors. They’re shiny and white with a crimson runner down the center. Sconces adorn the wall between each window, flickering with what appears to be red flames. A chandelier hangs in the foyer just ahead of us, the space decorated with chaises and chairs, all of which have those special wing notches in the backs. Not … what I was expecting from a spaceship.
“To our rooms,” he repeats, and my throat clenches on that word. Our.
“Before we go, can I see it?” I ask, and it hurts to even get the question out. I’m terrified that he’s going to tell me that he got rid of it. And by ‘it’, I mean the den. “The ship fragment?”
Rurik turns to look at me and this time, I meet his eyes. If he feels even a fraction of what I feel when I stare at him, he’ll be more likely to take pity on me.
“Why?”
That question … it hits like a hammer. It’s full of fury that I don’t understand, that I don’t want to understand. I don’t care what this guy’s motivations are. His actions are what I’m fixed on. His actions and not his … fucking pheromones. I turn away and cover the lower half of my face with a hand.
“Why?” he repeats, putting his hands on my shoulders. Heat hits me in the stomach like a kick, and I jerk away from him, turning and putting my back against the window. I’d choose space over this guy.
“Does it matter to you?” I don’t know why I’m even asking. This is an alien. It’s not a person. It isn’t fucking human, and it’s seriously pissing me off. All of a sudden, I remember: I don’t belong here. I want to go home. I just can’t decide if by home, I mean Abraxas or Earth. No, screw that. I know what I mean. I want my damn mate back. “Let me see it.”
Rurik shakes himself out, wings ruffling with agitation. He storms past me and I follow. At the end of the hall, there’s a large glass wall blocking off the rest of the space. On the other side of the glass, things float. Like, there’s no gravity and they float. I see chairs and side tables and a rug. Um.
“What is … why is that …?” I just stop talking as the prince turns to look at it like it’s nothing, like he sees this shit everyday. Like meaty walls and arteries on the ceiling don’t mean anything to him either. That red muscle tissue, those blue veins, it’s like the ship is alive.
“Breach in the hull,” he says, turning toward another door. He pauses there and looks over his shoulder. “I think it might’ve been a comet; I do hope we’re okay in here.” He leaves me there, the sound of his boots pounding across the floor.
I feel so dizzy right then, like I might not be able to stay standing. I’m in space. There’s no ground. One crack in one piece of glass and we’re in trouble. I don’t want to die in space. Something about that frightens me in a way I can’t explain. I was nervous enough about it when I was on Abraxas’ planet. But now? Where will my spirit go if I’m not on Earth?
The ground comes up quickly, and I fall—not fast enough for the prince. He catches me and then immediately puts me back on my feet. I sway and he snags me by the elbows. The concern in his expression is very real, and I don’t know how to feel about that.
