Tangle of Lies, page 24
“But Hadley. What other choice do you have?”
“To go quickly. Without losing my hair and poisoning my body and driving back and forth to the hospital for treatment after treatment after treatment. When the time comes, I’ll find a way. I’ll…make sure I go quickly.”
“Are you telling me you came home to die?”
“No. I could do that anywhere.”
The answer was obvious. “You’re here to find a new home for Madison.”
Hadley nodded. For a moment it seemed she would cry. But she took a deep breath and continued. “I need someone to raise my little girl. When I heard my cousin Jeff and his family had moved back here, I thought maybe they would be the ones. They already had small children and they were—are—my closest living relatives. But after today, that option is out. Even if they agreed, I wouldn’t want them anywhere near my daughter.”
“Were they here earlier looking for the ring?”
“Yes.” Again, Hadley battled tears. “I tried so hard to get to know them, to create a bond. But they were never interested in me or Madison. All they wanted was that emerald.”
Jeff’s father made sure he got all of Frank’s money. And now he had to have the emerald too? That level of greed was disgusting to Bobbie. “To hell with them. You and Madison don’t need people like that.”
“I wish we didn’t need them. But who else do we have?”
“What about Madison’s father?”
Hadley paused for what seemed like an inordinate amount of time before finally answering. “When I told him I was pregnant, Luke begged me to get an abortion. Since Madison was born, he’s only seen her twice. When I found out about my—growth—I contacted him. He said there was no way he could raise Madison if something happened to me. To be honest, even if he was willing, I wouldn’t trust him with her. So to answer your question, Luke is not an option either.”
Bobbie had suspected as much. But she wondered why Hadley had hesitated before answering. Did her reluctance to answer have something to do with the crumpled letter outside? Bobbie had only been able to read the letterhead, but it was certainly suggestive. She would have to follow up on her hunch, but for now she had to make this young woman understand she wasn’t alone.
“You have more friends in Tangle Falls than you realize. My mom and me. Stella. We’re here for you.”
“But this is ovarian cancer. It’s a killer, Bobbie.”
“Is that what your oncologist says?”
“I don’t need an oncologist to tell me. I lived through it with Mom.”
Bobbie grew suspicious. “But you have met with an oncologist? You have asked for your options?”
Hadley remained silent.
“How do you even know you have cancer?”
“When I started getting pains, I went to see a doctor in Victoria, and she confirmed I have a growth. She said they’d need more tests to determine if it was cancer, but I already knew. Look at my family history. My mother and grandmother both dead from cancer before they were sixty. Of course, the growth is cancerous.”
“Oh Hadley, but what if it isn’t?” She studied the young woman’s face and finally understood. Hadley was too scared to hope. In fact, she was terrified.
Bobbie moved beside her. She took both her hands and squeezed them tight. Hadley was a wisp of a woman with delicate bone structure and fair coloring. From the outside she might appear weak. But Bobbie knew that inside was a core of steel. She just had to help her tap into that.
“You think you’re being brave. You think you’re protecting Madison. But the opposite is true. You need to get those tests. You need to find out the results. And then, if the worst is true, you need to be brave and fight.”
“I-I don’t think I’m strong enough…”
“Your mother tried so hard to live. She knew you and Madison would need her one day. And she wanted to be here for you. As her friend, I know she would want me to step in now. To offer you the support that she would have dearly loved to give you.”
“Oh Mrs. G. It’s too much to expect. I can’t—” And then, finally overcome, Hadley broke down in sobs.
“Child, you go ahead and cry. You’ve earned it.” The trauma of losing a mother, the possibility of having incurable cancer, and worry for a three-year-old daughter was enough to make any woman breakdown. Bobbie went in search of tissues and came back with a box of them.
Hadley grabbed a handful. “You’re so kind.”
Bobbie’s instincts were telling her what she had to say next. Her more prudent side cautioned her to wait and reflect. Consult her family. But instinct won out.
“If anything did happen to you—and I’m praying it won’t—I would be happy to become Madison’s guardian. I’ll welcome her into my home, and love her, and foster her curiosity and passions.”
Hadley instantly stopped crying and stared at her. Seconds ticked by while they both processed the words that had been spoken. Bobbie wondered if she would come to seriously regret this moment. But she thought it was more likely that she would regret not saying the words, if she hadn’t.
“Do you mean that?”
“Yes. My mother and I already love Madison. But the real point here is that you have to stop worrying about your daughter and start taking care of yourself. Your first step has to be making a doctor’s appointment. Immediately. Am I clear?”
A faint smile emerged. Hadley blew her nose. Then she agreed. “Yes, Mrs. G. You’re clear. I promise I’ll make an appointment, first thing Monday morning.”
Bobbie sank back into her chair, relieved. She might be retired, but she hadn’t lost her touch.
*
The next morning Bobbie messaged her nephew to see if he had time to stop by for a brief visit. “I’d like to talk to you about something.”
“Can it wait for Sunday dinner?” There were sounds of a ruckus in the background. “The boys and I were about to go out for a bike ride.”
“This is something we need to discuss in private. Grandma is at her Tai Chi class right now, so I’ve got a window of about an hour. It shouldn’t take long. You’ll still have lots of time with your boys.”
In a strained voice he said, “I feel like a kid being summoned to the principal’s office.”
Sadly, Bobbie had the same feeling.
*
Five minutes later, Jesse parked his truck outside her front door and came bounding up the stairs and through the unlocked door. She was in the living room, waiting for him. She hadn’t bothered with refreshments or any other niceties. With a gesture she invited him to sit.
“Thanks for coming Jesse. There’s something I need to ask you. Normally it wouldn’t be any of my business. But something’s happened that trumps the usual social protocol.”
“What’s up?” Jesse perched on the edge of his seat, jangling his truck keys in his hand. They were on the silver key chain with the stylized “J” that she and Colin had given him for his sixteenth birthday.
“I’m afraid I can’t tell you everything.” She couldn’t betray Hadley’s confidence about the tumor and her worries it was cancer. “But it has something to do with my next-door neighbors.” She gestured, through the window, to the small bungalow on the other side of the street. “Hadley and Madison.”
“Oh.” His voice sounded small, and he looked at her with the eyes of the hunted.
She so did not want to do this. But she had to know.
“There’s no easy way to approach this, so let me be blunt. Jesse is there any chance you could be Madison’s father?”
All color drained from her nephew’s face. As a boy, he had never tried to lie or make excuses when he was caught out doing something wrong. His basic honesty was something she loved about him, and already, even before her suspicions were confirmed, her heart was finding reasons to excuse him.
He lowered his gaze to his keys, which he was still fingering like worry beads. “There is a very slim chance. I recently asked Hadley to submit a paternity test so I could know for sure.”
“Oh Jesse. Did the two of you have an affair?”
“Not an affair. We had a night. One night, almost four years ago. We both happened to be in Osoyoos. I was on a golf trip with Rene and his pals, she was with the band playing at a bar we happened to stop in at.”
Bobbie took a moment to absorb this. “Does Fallon know?”
“No. Or maybe she suspects something. She’s been weird about Hadley since she moved back.”
Thinking back to their conversation a few Sundays ago Bobbie said, “I think you’re right. Fallon is concerned about your relationship with Hadley. Jesse, are you happy with Fallon? Is there any chance she has a reason to worry?”
“God, no. I love Fallon and I love our life together. I was a fool thinking one indiscretion wouldn’t hurt anything. I wish to God I could take back that night.”
“Are you going to tell Fallon about it?”
Jesse tipped his head back and groaned. “I may have to. If the paternity test comes back positive, if I am Madison’s father, I can’t just ignore that. I wouldn’t want to. I’d have to tell Fallon. And the boys and my parents…” He groaned again. “What a fucking idiot I am.”
It seemed he didn’t know the results yet. Hadley must have just found out herself. But the test had to be negative or else Hadley wouldn’t be so stressed about Madison’s future. She had to know that if something happened to her, and Jesse was the father, he’d look after Madison.
“I can’t believe I screwed up so badly. But how did you find out Aunt Bobbie? Did Hadley tell you?”
“I just did some reading between the lines.” More like reading of a letterhead. “If you’re not the father, what will you do?”
“I’m torn. Part of me wants to get this off my chest and tell Fallon even if Madison isn’t mine. But it would cause her so much pain. And…what if she left me? What if this ends up destroying my family?”
The prospect of that was more painful than Bobbie had imagined. She hated to think of the ripple effects. On the twins, on Jesse’s parents, on herself and her mom. “Don’t say anything rash Jesse. I’m not an advocate for dishonesty, but if your reason for admitting to the…lapse…is to clear your own conscience, then I would suggest a better way to do that is to be the best husband and father you can possibly be.”
“Yeah. I hear you.” Jesse jangled his keys some more. “Sorry to confirm your worst suspicions of me.”
“Oh, Jesse. We all make mistakes. I’m not condemning you. I just hope your family can weather this.”
“Me too.”
As he stood to leave, she pulled him in for a hug. His remorse was so intense it made it difficult to be angry with him.
As she walked Jesse to the door, something she’d noticed about his keys came back to her. “Why do you have those tattered threads dangling from your keychain?” She took it from him for a closer look.
The cords were actually a severely frayed old friendship bracelet that had been looped through the ring that held all of Jesse’s keys. At the top she could still see the pattern…a little orange jack-o’-lantern on a black background.
Hadley had a friendship bracelet with the same pattern. And Bobbie suddenly remembered, so did she. It had been a gift from one of her former students. She thought it was upstairs with a stash of her favorite mementoes from her teaching years. But she couldn’t remember which of her many, many students, had given it to her.
“Where did you get this?”
“Um…I’m…hm…I’ve had it so long, I sort of forget.”
Bobbie narrowed her eyes. He hadn’t been able to lie to her about cheating on his wife. Why on earth was he lying about this bracelet?
Chapter Forty-Five
“You crazy kid.” Stella put her hands to her hips. “Of course, you can have time off to go to the doctor. Your mother put off getting medical help too long, for the same nutty reason. She didn’t want to take time off work. I felt like throttling her when she admitted that.”
Hadley tossed her apron into the laundry bag. They’d closed the diner fifteen minutes ago and it had taken her this long to work up the nerve to ask for time off tomorrow. It hadn’t taken Stella nearly that long to pry the reason out of her.
“My mom worked for you forever. I’ve barely been here a month.”
“Jesus, kid. This is a diner. The world will keep spinning if I’m short a pair of hands for a day.”
“Thanks Stella. But if I’m honest, the real reason I put off making an appointment is because I’m scared. I know this is cancer and I know it’s going to kill me. I’m just not ready to hear the doctors tell me that. Or worse, give me false hope. And I sure don’t want Madison riding that wave of hope and despair with me.”
“Oh Hadley.” Stella crossed the diner to give her a big, hard hug. “Two things you got to know. Not all tumors are cancerous. Not all cancers are incurable. You’re giving up too easy.”
Hadley wished she could take comfort from Stella’s words. She knew both statements were true.
But she also knew what had been true for her family. Her grandmother, dead at age fifty from ovarian cancer. Her mother, dead at age fifty-seven from ovarian cancer. If only she’d had her ovaries removed after Madison was born. But she’d thought she had time, at least a decade, to make that decision.
“My appointment’s at nine.” She patted her back pocket to make sure she had her phone. “I’m not sure how long it will be, but I hope to be at work no later than eleven thirty.”
“Like I said, no rush. Take the day if you want.”
“Thanks.” But she hoped she wouldn’t need it. Stella might think she was being helpful, but Hadley needed her weekly paycheck.
*
Hadley’s shoulders were tight as she walked toward the daycare to pick up her daughter. Her worries about the tumor had preoccupied her weekend but now she was thinking about the letter from the lab. Jesse had already sent a text asking if she’d heard back. She wished she knew what the right thing to do was for all concerned. Should she reveal the truth…or conceal it?
She passed a group of teenagers with ice cream cones, their conversation punctuated with bursts of laughter. If only she could step back to that July when she was seventeen, before she met Luke, when she was still in love with Jesse, and Fallon was her best friend, and her biggest problems were minor friendship dramas and the daily chore list her mother left her every morning.
Her life had been paradise back then and she hadn’t even known it.
But she felt better today than she had in long while. Bobbie had come over early that morning and given her the number of a good doctor and then she’d waited to make sure Hadley booked an appointment. More importantly she’d given Hadley the name of a lawyer. Hadley was meeting with her tomorrow too. She’d make a proper will, name Bobbie as guardian, and then track down Luke and get him to sign whatever papers were necessary to keep him out of the picture.
She didn’t anticipate it would be a hard sell.
The relief she felt knowing that whatever happened with her, Madison would be okay, was profound.
The kids at the daycare were splashing in and out of a series of kiddy pools that Fallon had placed all over the yard. Madison, the youngest, the smallest, was clearly having a blast. Still, when she saw her mother, she came running.
Oh, these hugs. She would fight like hell to stay alive if only for these hugs.
Fallon’s smile seemed a bit warmer today. “On Wednesday I’m planning to take the kids to visit my in-laws’ ranch. We’ll pet the horses and feed the chickens and pick strawberries in the garden. If you’re okay with it, I need you to sign this form.”
“Would you like to visit the ranch?” Hadley asked her daughter.
“Yes please! Fallon says there are kittens!”
“That’s right. I forgot to mention them. I may also have forgotten to mention that my in-laws are hoping a few of those kittens will find new homes.”
“How devious.” Hadley scrawled her name on the permission form, then thought, why not a kitten? It might prove a welcome distraction for whatever hard times lay ahead. She turned to her daughter. “If you find a kitten you really love we can think about adopting it. I’d have to meet the kitten first.”
There was quite possibly nothing she could have said to make Madison happier. As her daughter skipped and danced ahead, Hadley handed the form back to Fallon. “Do I bring her here at the usual time?”
“Yes. Jesse and I will drive the kids to the ranch and my parents and Angie are going to help supervise and keep everyone safe. And at the end of the day, you’ll pick Madison up here, as usual. And I promise there won’t be any kittens.”
“Thanks. This will be exciting for Madison. She’s never been to a ranch before.”
Fallon’s face softened as she watched the little girl happy dancing on her front lawn. “She’s a real sweetheart.”
“Remember when we were teenagers and we talked about the kind of families we hoped to have? You wanted daughters. I wanted sons.”
Hadley waited for Fallon to freeze her out again. But to her surprise Fallon laughed softly.
“We had no idea, did we? How much you love your children. How they seem perfect exactly as they are.”
“So true.” For the first time since she had moved home, Hadley felt she was glimpsing the old Fallon. It gave her hope that the two of them could become friends again. In time.
She thought again about the letter which she’d shoved to the bottom of her underwear drawer. Why could nothing in her life ever be simple?
Chapter Forty-Six
For the first ten minutes after leaving Grand Forks, Hadley was quiet, and Bobbie didn’t press her with questions. She’d offered to drive her neighbor to her medical appointments in order to offer moral support, but so far Hadley hadn’t leaned on her much. Bobbie did know that Hadley had been fast tracked. She’d gone from her appointment with Bobbie’s GP—who had also been Hadley’s mother’s GP—to a clinic for an ultrasound, then back to the GP.
Now she sat, pale-faced, shoulders slightly hunched, eyes fixed on the road ahead. Occasionally she sipped from the iced latte they had picked up at a drive-thru on their way out of town.
