Safe Haven, page 14
"No good conversation ever starts like that," Lucy replied.
"We need to prepare to fight for when this army returns."
Lucy pulled back from him, the same way Emma had. She looked at his face trying, hoping to see humour there. There was none.
"Sweetie...tell me you know I love you." Mike nodded. "So I'm saying this in your best interests, in my best interests, in everybody's best interests...that's insane." His face didn't change. "Mike. We would be wiped out. You said so yourself."
"We will be wiped out if we didn't ready ourselves, Luce. We can do this. I know we can."
"My God. Listen to yourself. A small handful of us against an army of god knows how many? This isn't the Seven Samurai, Mike. This isn't make believe."
"This is doable, Luce. We just need everyone to work together, and we need to start straight away."
Lucy took a deep breath and looked around the drab confines of the small bedroom. "I kidded myself that this day wouldn't come, but I knew it would. If you're right and that army is coming back to finish the job, then we need to get the hell out of here. To think we can fight them... Can't you see how mad that is? Please tell me you are not so detached from reality, Mikey."
"I know how it sounds, but listen to me," he took her hands. "I've got a plan Luce. I know how to do this." Mike's face was serious. His eyes intense. At that moment, she didn't know whether to be scared, to pity him or to believe him.
"Oh Mike. Listen to yourself, please sweetie. Look at least talk to someone with military experience. Talk to Shaw or..."
"For fucks sake Lucy!" He immediately let go of her hands and feral Mike was back. The scary uncontrollable one. "What the fuck is it with you and that man?"
"Don't start this again," she said, turning equally defensive. "Give me a break and stop being such a self-righteous prick!"
***
Sue sat down in her favourite armchair. It faced out towards the bay. Her living room had turned into a homeless shelter for the night much like the rest of the house. Sleeping bags with sleeping bodies were strewn over the floor, but she couldn't sleep. She had said goodnight to old and new friends in the kitchen and acted as if nothing was wrong. But something was very wrong. Up until this night, she had only had suspicions. But now she knew. She had faced her grandson. She had looked into his eyes and she had known. Right then. Right there.
***
"Have you ever done something you regretted so badly it ate you up inside?" Lucy asked.
Images flipped in Mike's mind. He was on top of that priest in the hospital, pummelling him with his fists. The man's face barely recognisable as a face by the time he had finished. Screams filled that hospital corridor as frightened patients, some young, some old, witnessed the bloody violence. Three men dragged Mike off that broken figure. He tried repeatedly to get back to him, to finish the job, but couldn't.
There was the time Mike's dad tried to lash Emma and his mum with his leather belt. Mike was just ten, but he broke a chair over his father's back. His drunken father barely noticed, but turned his attention to Mike. He threw the belt against the wall and threw Mike to the ground where he stayed, desperately trying to protect himself from his father's foot as it kicked him in the stomach, time after time after time.
Then there was that boiling sunny day when the family had been holidaying with Gran. Mike and his father had gone out swimming. His father had had a couple of beers, but nothing out of the ordinary for him. They were about sixty metres out, and then...then Mike's father had run into trouble. Thick, leathery snakes of seaweed had caught his legs and he started to struggle. He called out to Mike for help. At first Mike just looked on, but then thought better of it as he heard, "Help me you little bastard," in between gurgles of sea water. Mike dived down and saw his fathers feet were caught well and truly. The more he kicked, the worse it got. Mike swam back to the surface and watched his father splashing and spluttering in the water. "HELP ME, YOU LITTLE SHIT". His voice almost demonic in between coughs. Mike took a deep lungful of air and dived again. He wrapped, two more thick belts of seaweed around his father's ankles and pulled down with all his strength. For a short time, the kicking and struggling intensified, and then...nothing.
***
Sue looked out into the bay. How she used to love this view. She had seen it and she had loved it every day and every night. This bay. This view. It was poison now. She hated what her son had done to his family, but she could never hate him. Her eyes continued to look out across the shimmering water. Her breathing gradually becoming a little more erratic with each second, each beat. She felt a tightness in her chest. Her mouth fell open, but nothing came out. Her heart pounded and pounded and pounded and then...nothing.
***
It seemed like forever, but only a few seconds had passed by.
Lucy asked again. "Well Mike. Have you? Have you ever done something you immediately regretted? Something that eats away at you? Something you'd take back a thousand times if you could?"
"No," he said and turned to leave.
He walked back out to the Kawasaki, climbed on and powered away. He was not interested in greeting his friends back from their expedition. He was only interested in being alone. Mike headed up Deadman's pass and didn't slow until he reached the peak. The chill of the night air didn't bother him as he dismounted and released the kickstand. He had no idea what time it was, other than it being late. Other than it seeming like he had been awake for ages.
He was used to people calling him mad, calling him insane, but it still hurt when it came from the lips of someone he loved. He wasn't an idiot. He wasn't blind to the situation. But he knew that 10 men or 10000 men would not stop him from fighting for his family. The shadows of the landscape looked magical. He loved this place, he always had. He had loved Leeds, but Leeds had fallen. This place had not and he was not going to give it up for anyone or anything.
***
"He wants to go head to head with them?" asked Hughes.
"Yep," replied Lucy, dimming the light to the static caravan. Most of the occupants of this makeshift infirmary had finally drifted off to sleep. She stepped out into the cool night air and took a deep breath.
Hughes, Shaw, and Barnes followed her. Shaw and Barnes lit cigarettes and each took a long drag. Shaw finally exhaled a long plume of smoke. "I'm with Mike."
"What?" the other three replied in unison.
At that moment, the sound of a bike engine cut through the quiet and while Shaw's words still hung in the air, the Kawasaki rolled back into the camp ground. Mike turned off the engine and the bike came to a stop. He climbed off not missing a beat.
"Let me guess, you're discussing where you can get a straight jacket for me at this late hour?" he said half smiling.
Hughes looked distant as the two men hugged. Mike and Barnes clapped their hands together in a firm shake and Shaw and Mike nodded at each other. He and Lucy just exchanged a glance.
"Shaw just told us he thinks you're right," said Lucy, still in a state of shock.
"You do?" Mike asked, turning towards Shaw. A look of surprise swept across his face to match that of Lucy's.
"If we run what's to say they won't track us down? We would have lost the advantage we have here. This place is easily defendable…"
Suddenly, Mike was paying attention. He could never forgive Shaw for what he had done, and in truth, if it was not for Lucy, he would probably have killed him by now, but Mike wondered if there wasn't a little more to the man than he had given him credit for. After all, it had been Shaw who had saved Emma and Jenny and now he was echoing Mike's own thoughts.
"Exactly," Mike said. "I've already told Gran and Emma, we need a meeting tomorrow morning. We need everyone there."
"Listen, Mike, Shaw," began Hughes. "You're not thinking straight..."
Mike was about to interrupt, but it was Shaw who replied. "Hughes. This is our only option." He was going to continue when the thrum of an engine from one of the box vans made them all turn as it entered the camp ground. It skidded to a halt, and stone chips sprayed into the air.
It was Beth who jumped out and ran towards them. She started talking then stopped. She was clearly distressed. "Mike..."
"What's wrong?" asked Lucy.
"It's your gran, Mike," she replied with a sob.
"What about her?"
"She's gone."
"Gone? Gone where?" replied Mike.
"I'm so sorry Mike. She's dead."
"What... what hap... How?" he said.
"I think it was a heart attack or something."
Mike staggered back, and Lucy grabbed his arm, placing her other hand on his back. She guided him over to the infirmary and sat him down on the step. She sat down beside him, placed her arm around him and kissed the side of his head. The three soldiers stood there in stunned silence. They had just spent weeks in Sue's close company. They had all come to think the world of her, and now this.
"I need to head back. I need to see her," said Mike, trying to get back to his feet, but finding his legs had turned to jelly.
"We'll go in a second, sweetie. I promise you, I need to see her too. But just take a breath." Lucy took tight hold of his hand and began rubbing it gently.
"It's all my fault," he said to himself.
"Whatever happened, Mike, it's not your fault."
He turned to look at Lucy in the moonlight. "It is...we need to go now. I need to see her, Luce. I need to see her."
This time he did manage to get to his feet. Lucy kept tight hold of his hand. He slowly walked across to the three soldiers.
"Will you organise the meeting?" he asked. "It needs to be everyone...it needs to be first thing... I have to go now...I have to go home.
"Of course mate," said Hughes.
"I'm so sorry Mike," said Shaw patting him on the back twice. "She was a lovely, lovely woman."
"So sorry, mate," echoed Barnes.
"Thanks guys," said Lucy as she led Mike to the waiting van.
Beth climbed into the driver's seat. She clunked the gear stick into first, and they pulled away.
"Fuck!" said Hughes as the van disappeared into the night.
"It's shit, but it doesn't change anything. We have to have that meeting tomorrow," said Shaw as he walked up to one of the crowded residential caravans and knocked on the door.
***
Mike could hear Emma crying as he walked through the door. The candles were still lit. Lanterns were hanging in places and there was enough light to see the morose looks on people's faces. He walked past the sea of strangers and up to his sister who was kneeling beside their gran's chair. Sarah was cradling Emma and they were both sobbing.
"Em?" said Mike.
She looked up and outstretched her arms like a child begging to be held by a parent. He fell to his knees, breaking his hand away from Lucy's, and wrapped both his arms around her. He kissed her head and held her tightly.
Lucy knelt down beside him and placed her cheek on his back for a moment before kissing him and then turning her attention to Sue. She looked at her...still untouched. Her mouth and eyes still open. She checked for a pulse, but there was little danger of finding one, the body was stone cold. Whatever happened was sudden. Without a proper medical examination, Lucy's best guess was a heart attack. She gently closed Sue's eyes. Time to rest now. You got to see your family again before bowing out one last time. I'm so sorry Sue.
"It was probably a heart attack," she said to Mike and Emma. "It would all have been over in a flash. No pain, no suffering."
Mike broke away from Emma and turned towards Lucy. Fresh tears were in his eyes. "She was fit, healthy, she looked after herself...I don't understand," he said with a childlike innocence.
"Sometimes it's just time. There's no rhyme or reason. Sometimes it's just your time to go." She leant forward, kissed him, and then cradled his head into her.
"She'd want to be buried here," said Emma. "She loved this place since the first day she saw it. She'd want to be buried here"
"Don't think about any of that now," said Lucy. We'll get her moved up to her bedroom and we can take care of that in due time. She kissed the top of Mike's head as she got to her feet and took Beth to one side. "Could you take care of moving the body upstairs? I don't want Mike or Emma to have to do this," she whispered.
"Course I can," replied Beth. "Don't worry about anything. Sammy was heartbroken. She said her goodbyes, but she's fast asleep now though. All this has been too much for her."
Lucy looked back at the grieving siblings as she left the room. She quietly climbed the stairs and tiptoed along the hallway to her and Mike's bedroom. The house was crowded with strangers but their room had been left unoccupied. She knelt down and felt under the bed. No... no... there! The tape made a noisy rip as it peeled away from the underside of the bed. She pulled the pill bottle free and held it in front of her. Lucy sat down on the bed. The bottle there in her hand trying to seduce her... trying to suck her back in, but no. Shaw had helped her kick this habit. He had been through the same thing. He had seen the signs in her. He had made her strong. There was no way she was going to get dragged back in. She opened the lid and popped one into her hand, then replaced the bottle under the bed before going back downstairs.
"Emma...sweetie...we need to get you to bed."
Emma rose to her feet.
"Take this," said Lucy, putting the small tablet in her hand. It will help you sleep. Emma didn't even ask what it was, she just put it on her tongue and swallowed.
Emma bent down and kissed Mike on the top of his head. "I love you Mike." she said before walking out of the room hand in hand with Sarah.
Lucy saw that Beth had got a couple of blankets and had recruited a helper to move the body. She nodded and Lucy bent down to where Mike was still knelt. "How about you and I go for a walk?" She knew sleep would be impossible. She knew neither of them wanted to be in a house full of strangers when something so personal had just happened. He didn't say anything, but got to his feet and let himself be led out into the night.
"What time is it?" he asked as they walked into the shadows.
"I have no idea," Lucy replied. "Late...early...it doesn't matter. Let's just walk."
The pair held hands like lost children in a wood. They meandered down to the private cove where they had spent so many afternoons. Just being away from the house, being away from that scene relieved them.
"Thanks, Luce," said Mike as they both sat down on the cold sand. "For everything."
"I haven't done anything."
"You have. I know you're always looking out for me. Don't think for a second I ever take that for granted."
Lucy took hold of his hand and gently caressed the back of it with her thumb as they looked out at the calming waves.
"It was my fault, Luce," he said softly.
"Mike..."
"I killed my father." Her thumb stopped. "We were swimming in this bay, he got into trouble and rather than helping him, I pulled him down further. I murdered him. And today...today, gran finally figured it out."
He pulled his hand away and wrapped his arms around his legs pulling them to his chest. He started sobbing uncontrollably.
Lucy looked across at him, then out to the silhouettes of the small islands in the distance. She finally broke her silence. "This is the drunk who beat his wife and children? This is the drunk who used to get loaded then drive down to the store to get more liquor? D'you think I don't know what's inside of you, Mike? D'you think I don't know what you wouldn't do to save your family? To save the ones you love? It's who you are. It's what makes me love you. This wasn't some innocent. This was a man who cared about no one but himself. This was a man who could have ended up killing you, or your sister, or your mom...or another little girl like my daughter." Lucy's voice broke and she began to cry.
Mike looked across at her. "Luce, I..."
"I miss her so much," she said in between baying sobs. Mike immediately sidled up to Lucy, drawing her close. "I miss my little girl so much. I'd do anything to see her again just one more time. It was a drunk just like your father who killed her." Tears dripped off her face as she buried her head into Mike. She clawed her fingers into his chest with vice like strength, making him grimace. "You didn't do anything wrong," she whispered when her cries eventually died.
Mike kissed Lucy's head and angled her face up towards him. "You have no idea how much I love you, Luce." He kissed her lips and wiped away her tears with his fingertips. "You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, and you are my best reason for carrying on."
Her fluttering breaths calmed, and she moved her hand up to his cheek. "I feel the same," she said, her voice breaking a little, "but it's so good to hear it from you." She moved her lips up to meet his and withdrew. Her hand caressed his face then gently moved to the back of his head and pulled his mouth towards hers once again. They stayed like that frozen in time. They finally withdrew and gazed at each other in the moonlight. It was kind to them. It didn't show the stress lines or the grief, it just showed the two faces that fell in love with each other at the beginning of this journey.
"I love you," he said.
"I love you too."
CHAPTER TWELVE
The village hall was packed as the sun began to warm the morning air. There were faces both strange and familiar. Jules's people had joined the ranks of the locals, for after all, they were locals too now. The previous village meetings had been chaired by Sue and a small elected committee had sat alongside her on stage. Lucy, Emma, Raj, and Shaw were all that were left now. They were joined by Mike, who opted not to sit behind the table, but perch on one end of it. His hot-headedness was the reason he had not been asked to help form the committee, but today, he insisted on having a voice.
"Okay everybody, please quieten down, and we'll bring this meeting to order," said Shaw, rising to his feet. "Before I start, some of you may already have heard the sad news that Sue Fletcher passed away last night. She was a lovely lady, and I'm sure you'll all join me in giving Mike, Emma, and the rest of Sue's family our deepest sympathy."
