So True a Love (Daughters of His Kingdom Book 2), page 17
“I’ll meet you there.” The stranger dashed away as Nathaniel raced up the road toward his barn.
He grabbed his bag and leapt onto his mount, kicking Astor into a full run. The stars whizzed above him and the trees blurred as he raced to the scene of some accident or illness that was most certainly grave.
The road made a sharp curve. Nathaniel pulled hard on the reins when a thick shadow in the center of the road halted his speed. His pulse pounded, but he clicked his tongue and nudged Astor on at a slower pace. Nathaniel scanned the shadow and breathed harder when the silhouetted figures of mounted men grew clear in the moonlight. Was the injured person among them?
Three large men on horseback sat shoulder to shoulder, blocking the road.
Nathaniel clung to the reins with one hand, and pulled Astor to a stop as he casually reached for the pistol at his side with the other. He grit his teeth. No weapon.
Nathaniel sat higher. “Let me pass.” His voice boomed through the trees.
The riders shifted on their mounts, not a sound spoken from them, when a realization that should have nudged Nathaniel earlier crashed like a falling tree.
No one was injured. No one needed him at Gray’s...
Yanking hard on Astor’s reins, Nathaniel kicked the horse’s flanks. If he could out run them in the first few seconds he could make it to safety. Roars exploded behind him as the men yelled to one another and in moments the strangers came along side, careless of the horses’ dangerous speed.
One man drove his horse into Astor and slammed his body into Nathaniel, gripping him around the shoulders and pulling while another groped for the reins and yanked them from Nathaniel’s hands. Nathaniel gripped with his thighs and strained to shake off the attacker but Astor reared and Nathaniel plunged to the ground, slamming against the dirt with a smack that ripped the air from his lungs. He struggled to push up, but the ground swayed as lights flashed in his vision.
Get up. Get up now!
“Don’t mess him up too much,” someone said. “But make it look real good.”
Then the night went completely black.
Chapter Seventeen
Kitty sat on the bed, her knees tucked under her chin, still wearing her day-dress. The solitary candle that flickered on the table in the quiet room had been her non-judgmental companion for several hours already, and would continue to be, until it flickered its last glowing flame. Throat aching, eyes burning from the shedding of so many tears, she watched another drop of wax as it meandered down the ever-lowering stick. She closed her eyes and rubbed her aching head. How could I have done such a foolish thing? Dread combed over Kitty from head to foot and back up again, as it had from the moment she tore herself from Nathaniel’s consuming embrace. The pain in her joints and limbs continued to lament, continued to deepen. How tired she was, how weak. Her body, her mind needed to rest. But rest would not bring its needed companionship until her servitude was ended.
Cupping her hands over her face, she breathed deep to hold back the sobs that pushed for escape. Cyprian was no simpleton. He would make good, and the only thing Kitty could do now was wait until he did. Lord, I plead with thee, do not let my actions cause harm to come to those I love.
A knock at the door jerked Kitty from her prayer. Her heart plunked against her ribs, but she breathed through her lips to calm her quivering voice before answering.
“What is it?”
“’Tis I, Kitty. May I come in?” Eliza’s calming voice eased through the door.
Kitty rubbed her eyes and exhaled, trying to break free from the frightening truths that clung to her like heavy chains. Although Eliza likely knew something was amiss, Kitty might at least be able to blame the changes of personality on subtle illness—which might be more fact than fable, from the way her head throbbed—and keep the darker secrets from surfacing.
Kitty called toward the door. “Come in, Liza.”
The door creaked and Eliza entered, a single brown braid hanging over her shawl-draped shoulders. Her white nightgown brushed the tops of her stocking feet as she tip-toed toward the bed. She smiled, and crawled onto the feather pallet, pulling the covers up to her waist as she used to do all those years when they’d shared a bed. Eliza sighed and brushed her fingers along her small, but growing belly.
“You were not with us at supper.” The casual nature of the comment didn’t match the worry that turned Eliza’s dark eyes an even deeper shade of brown.
Kitty’s throat thickened and she stared at the end of the floral quilt, hugging her legs ever tighter. How could she eat when the oppression she suffered killed what appetite she might have had? How could she do anything when Cyprian was so angry over her failings? And now to know that because of a foolish kiss her family would surely suffer? A cold shiver raced over her, making her suddenly yearn for a blanket. Was she really so chilled, or was it merely the nipping regrets that cooled the air?
“Your spot in the kitchen has grown lonely of late. ‘Tis not like you to be gone so long from your favorite activities.” Eliza scooted closer and rubbed gentle circles on Kitty’s back, soothing her enough to allow Kitty to rest her forehead on her knees.
Eliza sighed as if trying to keep back a bushel of questions before settling on one. “You are not yourself Kitty, and I cannot help but worry over you. Thomas as well. What troubles you?”
Lord, I want to share this burden, but I fear that revealing such will do more harm than good.
At the thought, the travails of the past weeks pressed harder and clamored for release, but Kitty refused them, breathing tight and pressing her lips together to keep the moisture from her eyes. Kitty shrugged one shoulder and turned away.
Eliza continued the circles on Kitty’s back and gave a quick hum in reply, obviously dissatisfied.
“Father taught that keeping our burdens to ourselves is both unhealthy and unwise. You know this, Kitty.” The circles on Kitty’s back stopped. “From the beginning Nathaniel feared you were hiding something about your attack. I’m beginning to believe he is right.”
The mere sound of Nathaniel’s name broke the levy around Kitty’s tears and they flooded from her. Coursing and purging from the deepest cracks in her heart, she wept the fears and regrets that plagued her like a chronic pain. Her shoulders quivered and she gripped her legs harder with every sob. The more she cried, the more her body revolted—spilling out the tears like a cold winter rain.
Eliza cooed and whispered, wrapping her arms around Kitty’s shaking shoulders. “Kitty, please tell me what pains you. I want to help ease your burden but I cannot if I don’t know what troubles you.”
Kitty wiped her face on her skirt and tried to speak through her whimpers. “I haven’t been feeling well, ‘tis all.”
Eliza tugged Kitty against her and enclosed her in an embrace that soothed the gash in her heart. She tucked a tear-dampened lock of hair around Kitty’s ear. “We’ve been through so much. ‘Tis no wonder you have sorrows that beg for release.” She placed a gentle kiss on the top of Kitty’s head before handing her a handkerchief. “God knows your sufferings, Kitty. He will help you heal. I know He will.”
Wouldn’t God have helped by now? Kitty wiped her nose on the soft white square, but didn’t answer. She refused to give up her hold on her legs, comforted by the small shape she’d molded herself into.
Eliza sat back against the pillows and took up rubbing Kitty’s back once more. “I know it may seem as if God does not hear our cries, Kitty. But oft times we are waiting for Him to pluck us from our troubles, when ‘tis the very struggle that molds us into the person God intends us to become.”
Kitty glanced up, her throat growing impossibly tighter. How could such a thing possibly be? Not for her troubles, surely. God didn’t work through blackmail like Cyprian’s, and He certainly didn’t work in oppression and tyranny such as this. She had learned nothing, except to fear her enemy.
“Good evening, ladies.” Thomas’s voice echoed through the room. “How are—” He stopped in the doorway when his gaze fell on Kitty.
She turned her face away, but not before she caught the look of concern that painted his expression; the drop of his mouth and the instant wrinkle in his brow. “What’s happened?”
Kitty wriggled her toes and focused on the colorful fabric under her feet. ‘Twas bad enough for Eliza to witness such a display of emotion, but now Thomas? She couldn’t bring herself to speak. Again the waves of fatigue undulated up and down, and the longing for sleep clawed at her eyes.
Blessedly, Eliza answered for her. “She’s had a trying day.”
Kitty looked up and stalled, hoping the confession would be enough to subdue him, but it was not. Thomas’s blue eyes lingered, driving through the shield she’d raised to protect herself, as if he were trying to extract some kind of truth and at the same time heal a pain he knew was there.
“Is this about Nathaniel?”
Kitty’s face went from hot to scalding. She closed her eyes, unable to stand Thomas’s pointed gaze any longer. Did he know what had happened between them, or had he simply spoken thoughtlessly?
Eliza propped forward on her hands. “Did you and Nathaniel have a disagreement, Kitty?”
Turning to Thomas, Kitty hurled daggers with her eyes. If he did know, he had better not say.
Thomas pulled back, his jaw open. “For one who speaks so openly, I’m surprised you have yet to tell your sister.”
He does know!
“Kitty?” Eliza asked, eyes round.
Kitty would have thanked Thomas for relieving her of the emotions of moments past, if not for the undesirable, nay wretched subject he chose to discuss. “’Tis nothing, Liza. I assure you.”
“Nothing?” Thomas shifted his weight and flicked his gaze between them, as if gauging his next move as carefully as one might a chess piece on a board. Finally his stare landed on his wife and he spoke with enough candor to make Parliament proud. “Nathaniel has kissed her.”
Kitty groaned and dropped her head in her hands.
Eliza gasped and tugged on Kitty’s arm, her tone carrying equal measures of delight and concern that made Kitty want to evaporate into vapors. “Did he really, Kitty?”
Kitty pulled away and met Eliza’s wide stare. Better to confront the truth than deny it. “Aye, but ‘twas a mistake and won’t happen again. Are you satisfied?” She directed the last to Thomas.
He stepped closer to the bed, the softening muscles in his face reading like the tender care of a sibling. “I cannot bear to see you suffer the pains of a broken heart, Kitty.”
The tight muscles in her neck relaxed the longer she stared at him, the anger suddenly fleeing at the concern in his eyes. Though his disclosure was unwelcome, the tenderness was not. “Thank you, Thomas. My tears are not for Nathaniel. I can assure you my heart is fully intact.” Once the words flipped out, she snapped her mouth shut. For that was a lie. Her heart was in shambles.
Eliza’s mouth tipped up at the corners and her dark eyes seemed to reflect the candle’s glow even more than before. “I won’t press you to share that which you wish to keep to yourself, but I must know if—”
Just then the downstairs door smacked open. “Thomas! Thomas!”
Thomas’s face went white as the frantic sound of his name speared the quiet. He spun around and hurried from the room. “Who’s there?”
Eliza jumped out of the bed, holding tight to her gray shawl as Kitty sprung from her huddled position and ran for the stairs behind her sister, praying her tearful pleadings had not gone unanswered.
Once in the parlor, the horrid scene forced Kitty against the wall and wrapped around her neck like the cold hands of the enemy.
Nathaniel!
Body limp, head awash in blood, Nathaniel hung between Joseph and Roger as they dragged him through the door and laid him on the rug.
She could not take a breath, could hardly see for the fear that choked and pressed her conscience near to death. Please, Lord, he cannot be dead.
Thomas knelt beside his friend, his face ashen. “Eliza go into the kitchen and fetch some water. Kitty we need bandages. Quickly.” Thomas looked between Joseph and Roger before returning his attentions to the blood trickling down Nathaniel’s face. “How did this happen?”
Joseph started first, kneeling on the opposite side. “I found him crawling from the woods not far from Gray’s farm. When I reached him he went unconscious. ‘Twas a miracle I was even there.”
Kitty pressed her back against the hard wall. The truth punched her in the stomach with as much force as if she had been struck by Cyprian himself.
Dear Lord, no!
Kitty stumbled sideways, trying to keep her legs from losing their strength. She gripped the wall. Focus, Kitty. Remain strong. Bandages. He needed bandages...
But she couldn’t tear her gaze from Nathaniel’s wounds. The blood that oozed from the cut above his eye seemed to call after her, blaming her for its incessant shedding. Kitty looked at her feet, willing them to move. They refused. Blinking, she tried to make sense of such a nightmare. She should have told! She should have warned them what was to come. Vision wavering, Kitty clutched her throat. But how would that have stopped Cyprian’s tyranny over her—over them? He would still have had his way.
She was trapped.
And now look what she had done.
Attempting to swallow, she stared at Nathaniel’s motionless body when Thomas’s clear voice snatched her out of the mire of her thoughts.
“When did you find him?”
“Not twenty minutes ago.” Roger stood back, his shoulder glistening from Nathaniel’s blood.
Eliza rushed in from the kitchen, a bucket of water under one arm and a wad of rags in the other. Water sloshed to the ground when she hurriedly dropped the heavy bucket and knelt at Nathaniel’s head. Her eyes suddenly widened then narrowed and she pushed up and stood in front of Kitty, ducking her head to meet Kitty’s drifted gaze.
Eliza gripped Kitty’s arms. “He will be well. But in this moment you must be strong. You know more of medicine than any of us, and we need your help. Nathaniel needs your help.”
Kitty could not keep her limbs from quivering. She pulled her lips between her teeth and peeked over Eliza’s shoulder at the man she loved.
Oh dear Lord!
She cupped her mouth. I love him.
Eliza continued to plead. “Kitty?”
Kitty sucked in a choppy breath and shook her head ever so slight. “Nay, I cannot. I’ve never cared for someone so hurt.”
Thomas rushed forward, his face crumpled. “Please Kitty, you know more than any of us here.”
Tears blurred her vision. Lord, give me strength.
Just as the prayer floated from her mind, the terror cleared enough to allow the blood to once again pump through her limbs as if God Himself had touched her with His all-powerful hand.
She inhaled a breath that chased away the remaining tremors. Thank you, Lord!
Kitty rushed forward. After what she’d done, if anyone would save Nathaniel, it should be her.
“Bring him to the kitchen.”
The men grunted in unison as they heaved him from the ground.
Kitty raced into the dark room, lighting a candle as the men rested Nathaniel’s body on the vacant table. Candlestick in hand, she spun around and tried not to whimper. Nathaniel’s hair stuck to his face where the blood drained above one eye. Another trickle oozed from his nose.
She handed the candle to Roger. “Thomas and Joseph, remove his coat, we must check his chest for injuries.”
Gingerly, the two men pulled Nathaniel’s limp arms from his dirt-covered jacket. Kitty snatched a pair of sheers from the drawer in the corner cabinet and cut Nathaniel’s already ripped and blood stained shirt. Removing the linen away from his torso, she scanned his chest and breathed more deeply. No bruising. Dare she hope his injuries were not as terrible as they appeared?
She trained her voice to remain even. “Joseph, remove his boots so I may check for breaks.”
He nodded and immediately complied.
She smoothed her fingers up Nathaniel’s right leg, then his left. No breaks. Lord in heaven, I thank thee.
Moving around the table she tenderly tugged at the blood-matted hair that clung to the open cut above his eye, her heart bleeding the same as his wound. She pushed out a hard breath and straightened her shoulders, encouraging the strength that wavered to remain erect. She met Thomas’s pained gaze. “This cut on his head appears to be the worst of it.” She leaned closer to inspect the extent of the injury. “’Tis deep. I will need to stich it.”
Eliza stepped forward. “What do you need?”
“Your sewing kit.”
Eliza darted from the kitchen and returned moments later, the basket over her arm. Kitty pressed a quivering hand to her mouth. How could she do this when her fingers refused to remain still?
A warm hand covered hers, and Kitty turned to her sister. The trust in Eliza’s eyes looked akin to Father’s, granting Kitty enough strength to calm her shaking. Be with me, Lord, I pray thee.
As another, more oppressing wave of pain and weakness crashed over her, she plucked a needle from the basket and threaded the tiny tool, rehearsing in her mind the vow she must now and forever cling to, for the lives of those she loved surely depended on it. She must stay away from the man she loved. She must never again fail at her post.
Keeping him alive, keeping him safe, was all that mattered now.
Chapter Eighteen
Nathaniel yanked the wrap from his head and hurled it to the floor of his bedchamber. “I am the doctor, Thomas. I should not be abed. Not when there are patients to be seen.”
The afternoon sunlight blazed through the half-open window and the absent sounds of the road not far from his home sung of the Sabbath. If only his friend would leave, he could have his home to himself and be about his regular business. “I am not a child to be coddled.”
